by Karen Cogan
Andrew nodded. He pointed to Jed.
The colonel studied Andrew gravely. “That’s all, young man. You may rejoin your family.”
He turned to Jed. “Mr. Mason, have you anything to say in your defense?”
Jed lurched toward Andrew, only to be restrained by his guards.
“It’s all a lie. Caroline and the Yankee made it up so people would think bad of me instead of them.”
The colonel stroked his chin. “Miss Ashcroft, would you be willing to take the witness chair?”
Caroline felt as though her heart had stopped. Legs trembling, she came forward.
“Did Mr. Mason ever make any threats toward our officers?”
Caroline licked her dry lips. “Yes, he said they’d be sorry they came here.”
“And was he wearing a weapon on the night he threatened to burn your house?”
Yes.”
“You may be excused.”
Caroline avoided Jed’s eyes as she returned to her seat.
After questioning Nate about what he could remember about the shooting, the officers huddled in deliberation. They reached a verdict in less than fifteen minutes. The colonel cleared his throat. He folded his hands.
Wearing a solemn expression, he faced Jed. “Our court finds you guilty, Mr. Mason. We sentence you to justice by firing squad tomorrow at sunrise. I suggest you make peace with your Maker.”
Jed’s face, which had been hard as granite, turned pale. Though Caroline felt no doubt as to his guilt, she felt a lump rise in her throat. The war that had brought her Nate had destroyed a childhood friend.
She watched with a heavy heart as they led Jed away.
Nate placed a hand on her arm. “I’ve asked one of the men to bring the buggy to the back of the jail. You can leave without facing the crowd. It could get ugly.”
Caroline knew what she had to do. “Please, I have to see Jed. I can’t let him die without telling him the plan of salvation.”
James overheard. “I don’t know how you can face him after what he did.”
“I have to.”
Nate nodded.
“I’ll talk to the colonel.”
He returned after he secured permission.
“Would you like me to go with you?”
She shook her head. “It would be better if I went alone.”
One of the guards unlocked the door and led Caroline to the block of cells.
Jed sat inside, head in his hands. He looked up as the guard unlocked the cell door.
Caroline stepped inside. The guard cast a dour look at Jed and touched Caroline on the elbow. “I’ll be here if you need me.”
The hatred had gone from Jed’s eyes, replaced by glazed disbelief. “I never meant for things to turn out like they did. I never wanted to hurt you or Andrew. I sent Dobbs and Nelson to scare Andrew out of testifying. I felt bad they came back, telling me he was dead.”
Caroline shivered, remembering the last time she’d seen the white-hooded deputies riding beside Jed.
She swallowed hard. “For awhile we thought he might die.”
Jed lowered his eyes. “Dobbs and Nelson are clear out of the county by now, but I want you to know I’m sorry for what happened. I know you can’t forgive me for everything I’ve done, but I want you to know I did love you.”
Caroline breathed deeply, stilling her mind and pushing aside all the hurt and anger Jed had caused.
“I do forgive you. More importantly, God will forgive you, too.”
Jed gave a derisive snort. “It’s too late for that.”
“The Bible tells us God forgave David for arranging the death of Bath-Sheba’s husband. If you repent and give your life to the Lord, even now you can be forgiven.”
Jed sat quietly.
“We’ve all fallen short of the glory of God. Still, God allows us to escape the penalty of the law by giving our lives to Jesus and accepting what He’s done for us. Can you do that, Jed?”
His eyes drew to her face. She saw tears clinging to his lashes. “Maybe later. When I’m alone.”
She bit her lip, accepting his wishes. “I’ll pray for you.”
He took the hand she offered, his fingers so cold they made her shiver, reminding her of death. The understanding that her mission was over filled her with an urge to escape the dismal cell.
“Good-bye, Jed.”
She did not look back as she left. She had done all she could. The remainder rested with Jed.
She met the others at the back door. Nate helped her into the buggy. He stood staring up at her. “I want you to know I don’t take any pleasure in seeing this man die. It’s only justice I want.”
Caroline studied his honest face. “I know. That’s why I love you.”
They sped away, leaving Caroline to remember the concern on Nate’s face and the torment in Jed’s eyes.
The evening passed with little conversation as each remained consumed by sad expectation. At last, only Caroline and James sat alone in the parlor. He studied his hands.
“What Hattie said wasn’t true. This wasn’t your fault.”
Caroline frowned. “That hardly seems to matter. The bitterness toward this family will not end as long as I stay here.”
He surprised her by nodding. “I’ve been thinking hard the last few days. I saw so much misery in the war. I began to feel the only safety was to put myself in control. I wanted to keep you and Andrew safe and protected.”
Caroline opened her mouth to sympathize. He held up his hand to stop her. “When I saw you kneeling beside Andrew and saw the trust you had in God’s providence, I realized I’m not in control of anyone’s life. Only God is. Go west if that’s where God calls you. Your destiny and protection lie in His hands.”
She felt her doubts melt away. “You can’t know how I’ve struggled between my desire to stay here and my longing to be with Nate. I’ve been praying if it was right to go, you’d come to peace with the idea. I feel sure that God has answered me.”
He studied her with earnest sea-green eyes that reminded her of their Pa. “I want you to be happy. I’m sorry my fears nearly caused you to lose a good man like Nate.”
“I guess my idea of happiness changed when God took away frivolous things I thought would make me happy, leaving me to see what was really important.”
They sat in companionable silence until they retired to bed. Caroline tossed under her light covers. The excitement of going west mingled with the anxiety of knowing Jed’s life would end when dawn arrived. Though she had despised the man he’d become, she took no comfort in his death.
She drifted off at last, only to be awakened at first light by what she thought were gunshots. She sat up with a start, heart pounding. She took a deep breath and came to her senses, realizing she lived too far from town to have heard the firing squad. Not gunshots, but the staccato sound of a horse’s hooves pounded up the drive. She looked out to see Nate dismount and hitch his horse.
She slid into a cotton dress and ran barefooted down the stairs. Gran would object to see her hurrying to meet a gentleman with her hair down and bare feet, but she must know what brought Nate so early.
She met him in the doorway. His grim expression chilled her heart. “Is it over?”
He took her hands, drawing her into the parlor. “It was over sometime during the night. Jed hanged himself in his cell.”
She gasped as she absorbed the news. He led her to the settee where she sank onto the velvet cushion.
“I presented the Gospel…” The image of what Jed had done formed a knot in her stomach.
Nate caressed her hands. “I know. Still, Jed made his own decisions, but God is merciful. You know that. You’ll have to put all of this behind you now.”
She lifted her eyes to his face. “Far behind me. I want to go west with you.”
“You’ve made me the happiest man alive.”
Caroline smiled. “I’d only want a small wedding, just Gran, James, Andrew and Mary. We could be married in th
e parlor by our minister.”
Nate sighed, and then a smile lit across his face. “How soon could you be ready?”
“Saturday afternoon. I could wear Mother’s wedding dress, so there’s very little preparation.”
Stirrings in the house told them the others were arising.
Nate cocked an eyebrow. “Shall we tell them?”
Caroline’s heart felt as though it would burst with excitement. “Why not?”
The rest of the week seemed a blur of packing and sewing for her trousseau. Storage would be tight on the wagon for the trip west. Still, Caroline wanted to arrive at her new home with the basic necessities.
Saturday morning, Gran helped Caroline pile her dark hair atop her head and don the satin and pearl wedding dress.
The white layered cake sat iced atop the table, and all was ready when Nate and the pastor arrived.
Caroline took James’s arm and walked down the long stairs and into the parlor where Nate awaited, splendid in a black suit. His eyes shone in azure approval as she entered the room.
“You look beautiful,” he whispered.
She blushed under the veil.
Mary took her bouquet of roses as the ceremony began. Looking into Nate’s eyes, she had no second thoughts as she repeated the vows and accepted the simple gold band that would accompany her into her new life.
After the ceremony, Mary caught her arm. Tears glistened in her eyes.
“I’m so happy for you. I’m only sorry you won’t be here to be matron of honor for my wedding.”
Caroline bit her lip. She was glad she would not be here to put Mary in an awkward position. Mary was too loyal to think of shunning her. Yet her mother would want a lavish church wedding with invitations for nearly everyone in town. With feelings running the way they were, Caroline knew her presence could ruin what should be the happiest day of Mary’s life.
Caroline hugged her tightly. “I’ll think of you on your wedding day and pray for your happiness.”
They wiped away tears as James enclosed them both in his arms. “I hope these are tears of joy and not a reflection of your feelings about marriage.”
Caroline laughed as Mary swatted playfully at his arm.
After cake and good wishes, they spent the afternoon trying to comfort a pouting Andrew, who wished to head west on their adventure.
At Caroline’s request, they spent the night in her room, the last night she would spend on her beloved plantation. The next day they planned to head north to visit Nate’s family for a final good-bye.
She awoke after dawn, surprised to find Nate’s warm body curled next to her. As her memory flooded back, she brushed back a strand of dark hair that had fallen over his forehead. Still aware of the comforting sound of his even breathing, she crept from bed to peer out the window.
She drank in the scent of flowers and grass, magnolias and honeysuckle. She studied the stately oaks and verdant grasses, heard the robin calling to his mate. She wanted to remember, with all of her senses, all that she loved—to be able to recall it at will. She would miss the dogwood when it bloomed next spring and the endless fields of cotton when the brief flowers appeared. She hoped she would find a similar joy in the unique scenery of the west.
Her attention focused on her memories so completely that she did not hear Nate stir until she felt his warm arms around her.
“It is a beautiful view. I can see why you love it here. I hope you’ll be happy in the west. I want you to be happy always.”
She snuggled deeper into his arms. “Wherever you are, I’ll be happy.”
The aroma of breakfast drew them downstairs where a feast awaited.
“Never start a trip on an empty stomach,” Gran advised.
In spite of her excitement, Caroline found she was quite hungry.
Andrew joined them, looking glum. “I don’t see why I can’t go west right now. I’m old enough to know my own mind.”
Nate wiped his mouth with a napkin. “James needs you here to get the place up and running again. If you still want to come out in a few years, you have an open invitation to come to us.”
Andrew sighed. “I’ll wait, but I won’t change my mind.”
All too soon, Caroline found herself standing beside the wagon as Nate and James loaded her trunk.
Gran wiped tears from her eyes. “I’m going to miss you so much.”
Caroline hugged her close. She wanted to say they’d meet again. But with the miles that would separate them, she feared it was unlikely.
“I’ll miss you, too. Soon you’ll have great-grandchildren in this house. That should keep you busy.”
“That will be a blessing. But that doesn’t mean I’ll forget the granddaughter I love so much.”
Nate stood waiting beside the wagon. “All loaded.”
Caroline gave her brothers a hug, and then threw her arms around Gran for a final embrace. ““I’ll write when we reach Nate’s family.”
Nate assisted her onto the wagon. She settled in, adjusting herself to the thought that this would be her new home for several months.
Nate shook the reigns and the wagon moved forward. Caroline looked back at her family until they disappeared behind a bend in the road. She wiped the tears from her eyes and watched the familiar landmarks from her childhood slip away. And then she turned forward. There would be no more looking back as she turned her heart to the future.
Fragile Dreams
One by one, she was losing the people closest to her and perhaps, her home as well. Appealing to God had seemed about as helpful as whispering to the wind. If God chose to heap problems on her and not lift a finger to ease her distress, she wouldn’t give Him the pleasure of hearing her pray. She could look to no one but herself for decisions that would affect her future.
She stood at her bedroom window and watched the full moon slip between the clouds in an overcast sky. She breathed the comforting scent of the damp earth of her home, shivering in the chilly air as she began to unhook the tiny buttons that closed the back of her dress.
She blinked, staring hard as a dark form moved from the barn toward the pump at the old well. She held her breath as she tried to make out what had collapsed near the well and was now lying still. As the moon made a brief appearance through the layer of clouds, Caroline could see the prostrate figure of a man.
Table of Contents
Fragile Dreams
CHAPTER ONE
CHAPTER TWO
CHAPTER THREE
CHAPTER FOUR
CHAPTER FIVE
CHAPTER SIX
CHAPTER SEVEN
CHAPTER EIGHT
CHAPTER NINE
CHAPTER TEN
CHAPTER ELEVEN
CHAPTER TWELVE
CHAPTER THIRTEEN