“Listen honey,” said Betty, “Somehow we are going to have to fit in here. I’m not liking the idea of you doing things like that around them.”
“But then what was the point of leaving? I want to be myself and not have to worry about what people think.”
“Bonnie, my love, you have been hurt. I cannot pretend to understand all that you have been through, and I have been there with you for nearly all of it. But I love you dearly, and nothing destroys me more than seeing you go through pain. You know how much I love you, dear, don’t you? I ask you to trust me. You’re going to have to hide your powers.”
“What?” cried Bonnie.
“Shhh,” whispered Betty, “I’m sorry dear. But this isn’t like before. This isn’t about people who will hurt you. This is about people who are much, much weaker than you. We have to learn how to live among them. I want you to be part of this world and enjoy all it has to offer. I want you to have friends and go to school like everyone else, and then have a job and a career, and one day have a relationship, and maybe get married and have a family of your own.”
“And nobody will ever know who I really am?”
“Now listen. I didn’t say never. You will grow up and you will find your place in this world. And I believe you will figure out how and where you can use your powers to the benefit of the people of this world. Believe me when I tell you that this is not a simple thing to understand. But we’re going to have to begin by hiding our powers. This is just a necessity.”
And so, they hid their powers, and lived as humans. And Bonnie had gone to school, and graduated. And she loved this world, and cherished it. It would always be the planet she belonged to. And yet she did not fully belong. She was not human, and would never be. Yet somehow, she needed to find her place.
Rain was falling as Bonnie returned to New York, but she could scarcely have noticed, for she descended much faster than any raindrop. She soon emerged from her closet. Then she took out a few comic books and read. And now, reading about the many misfits and their adventures, at last she found some peace.
“Ah yes, Tracy,” said Betty over the phone, “Lisa did say she had a date. She didn’t tell you? Oh. Well, I’m sorry about that. Uh…no. She didn’t tell me details. She just left after she told me…Well, I am sorry she kept this from you, but she is a sensible girl. I’m sure she’s perfectly safe…Well, right. Yes! When she gets home is a different argument. I think she had to know you’d find out. I’m the same way. I always know where my girl is, and she doesn’t always make it easy, but I have my ways, and I see that you also have yours. Ah, you too, dear. So long, Tracy. Talk to you tomorrow.”
Hanging up her phone, Betty listened as her daughter returned. She walked over to Bonnie’s room, and saw her daughter reading her comic book.
“Good night dear,” she said.
“Good night Mom,” said Bonnie.
Betty returned to her room, where her TV remained on through the night. That was her companion, this night as well as all others, her solace for her many regrets, and for the secrets she kept all to herself.
5. Making the Case
Bonnie woke up the next morning with a start. She was sweating, and just barely catching her breath. As she sat up in her bed, she tried to remember her dream.
Her nightmare was dim now. All she could recall was that she was fleeing. She was running, flying, swimming, trying to get away somehow. There was a punishment! That was it. She was desperately running away from something that was going to be done to her. But whatever she did, whichever way she flew, it seemed she kept hitting an impenetrable wall. That was all she could recall.
Why was she having so many nightmares lately? It was starting to feel like every night. Could it be the rise of Johnny Gunn?
As much as he disgusted her, he did have a large and enthusiastic following. Many of his fans saw a savior. That was what was so dangerous about him. They believed he could deliver safety by cruel, tyrannical approaches. It seemed they were sold on Gunn’s own inflated vision of himself.
Hearing speeches from Johnny Gunn reminded her of the world she had fled from, of cruel men who believed themselves above all laws, and who had caused unspeakable misery for so many. Having escaped from an extreme dictatorship, she was now faced with the possibility that her adopted country might fall to the same fate.
That morning, Hal was walking home with his friend, Teddy. They had just exited the “7” train, and in the relative quiet of the morning, faced only a short line and a minor inconvenience at the checkpoint. More importantly, both were waved on, a privilege they scarcely considered the significance of.
Now as they reached a distance from the noisy elevated rails, the Sunday morning calm persisted over the Woodside streets. Metal awnings covered the stores that were not yet open, and the puddles served as a reminder of the previous night’s rain, together with the cool morning dew that settled in the air. As they departed from the elevated rail structure, they talked and laughed. But Hal had much on his mind.
“Thanks for letting me stay over,” said Hal, “It’s great spending time just playing video games and eating pizza, just like college. I miss that.”
“Hey! We good!” said Teddy, “I miss my home-dog!”
“Well…sure. Of course. Besides, I needed a night off from my family.”
“They still mad crazy, right?”
“They still…umm, well my parents are still fighting nonstop. That’s pretty…I don’t know. It just sucks. So, Teddy, I wanted to ask you something…”
“Yo, shoot brotha!”
“I’ll take that to mean ‘Okay go ahead?’ Am I right?”
“You is ganging!”
“And you ain’t gangsta no matter how much you try to talk like it! C’mon, Teddy Boy. You’re a middle class white kid. You’re so white, you’re from Whitestone!”
“Alright Hal,” said Teddy, “What did you want to ask me?”
“It’s about a girl you work with,” said Hal.
“There’s no girls in my department,” said Teddy, “Electronics is all guys. The guy training me says they don’t like it there, but I think he’s the problem. He’s got a rep for being all grab-hands.”
“I don’t mean electronics,” said Hal, “I’m talking about a cashier. Her name is Bonnie. Kind of dark, petite.”
“Ah, you like her. I know who you mean. She’s kind of loud. Not that pretty either. She’s Lisa’s friend, so she’s probably two years older than you.”
“Hey, I like her.”
“Then why don’t you just ask her out?”
“I don’t know her. I’d rather not just move in like that.”
“Yeah,” said Teddy, “That’s why you have no fun, not even in college.”
“Maybe this is the last thing I should think about,” said Hal, “I have a lot to deal with right now. There’s still no luck on the job front either, and I really should be attending to that.”
“When you get to be a TV reporter, then you be scoring all the chicks you want!”
“That’s not what it’s all about. I’m a journalist. I’m interested in the events going on around me. I want to help keep people informed.”
“That’s your problem. You think too much!” said Teddy, “You should just party, enjoy yourself!”
They soon arrived at Hal’s building, a medium-sized brick apartment house. As they reached the depression leading to the entrance, Hal started to feel dread. What was one night away when every day with the family was now misery?
“Yo, we out!” said Teddy.
“Sure,” said Hal, “We out, except I’m going in.”
“You know what? I don’t have work for another hour. Why don’t we look for some girls? You know, it can be like college.”
“Well, I don’t know...”
At that moment, a little girl came running out of the lobby and jumped into Hal’s arms.
“Hal!” she cried.
“Hi Stacy!” said Hal, “You shouldn’t be
down here all by yourself.”
“Mom and Dad don’t even notice anymore. They’re too busy screaming at each other. Can you take me to the park?”
“Sure!” said Hal.
Teddy looked dismayed. “You’re not taking her with us, are you? We can’t cruise with your baby sister.”
“Sorry Teddy,” said Hal, “I have my date.”
Lisa tiptoed quietly into the kitchen, thinking to take a roll or cold cuts out of the fridge, then sneak out to work and eat her breakfast as she walked. But as she reached the fridge, she failed to notice her mother creeping up behind her, next to the entrance.
“Good morning, Lisa!” said Tracy Lin, “So, dear daughter, how will you spend day number seven hundred and ninety five?”
“Oh no, Mom! Not again!”
“It’s more than two years since you graduated. I’ll bring it up all I want.”
“And why are you even asking?” said Lisa, “Whatever I might be doing, you would already know about it! Why do we even bother with conversation?”
“Because this is not alright,” snapped Tracy.
“Oh right. That’s why. You need to criticize.”
“Lisa, I want you to achieve. Just because I’m an office manager doesn’t mean you have to be. I will not apologize for assuring my child’s success. It’s you who has to take it to the next step.”
Lisa finally sat down at the table. It was clear that there would be no escaping this discussion. Maybe if she approached it from a less confrontational standpoint, she could effect a shorter version of it. However, from her mother’s expression it was also looking very much like another topic was imminent.
“Can you please trust that my future is on my mind?” said Lisa.
“As much as boys?” said Tracy, “You certainly know how to take the initiative when there is a boy that you like.”
There it was. There was no question that her mother knew about the night before. “Alright Mom, spill. What do you know?”
“You asked a boy out.”
“Yes.”
“I’m sorry,” said Tracy, giving her daughter a piercing look from behind her glasses, “but I was raised very differently.”
“So?” so Lisa, eyes rolled.
“Let me ask you something,” said Tracy, “When you come on like that to a boy, what message are you sending? Don’t you think there are reasons for tradition? Maybe you don’t. Well, when your best friend is Bonnie Boring…”
“Can you please stop picking on her? Wait…she’s not the one who told you, is she?”
“Of course not!” said Tracy. “I don’t ask her anything. Bonnie’s a space cadet. I’m not sure if she even knows what’s going on with her own life. However, I wouldn’t have minded if you told me you were on a date last night. I shouldn’t have to ask Betty Boring. So why do you tell your best friend’s mother you have a date, and not your own mother?”
“Honestly Mom,” said Lisa, “Normally I wouldn’t. I just needed to make my exit. She kept asking me questions about Bonnie.”
“So, she’s getting you to tattle on Bonnie,” said Tracy, “Hmm. I knew I liked her!”
“But wait a minute,” said Lisa, “I just told her I had a date. I didn’t tell her that I asked him out…”
“Hey, about Betty. You’re there a lot. I mean…you’re pretty sure…Well, do you know if she’s…”
“Mom! I’m not going to gossip about other families with you!”
“Huh! Too good for gossip? Well, just don’t expect me to stop asking about you!”
“So, who told you I asked him out?”
“You really need to think towards your career. Don’t make your father and me choose it for you!”
“Who was it who told you?”
“Did you hear what I just said?” said Tracy.
“Mom,” said Lisa, “It’s the seven hundred ninety fifth rerun of that! But who told who about…”
“I know it’s a rerun. Your reruns are worse. Do you think we can rerun supporting you forever?”
“Who told you?”
“Julia.”
“I knew it.”
“There. Now, your career…”
“Sorry, Mom. Gotta go to work.”
“Wait!” shouted Tracy, “You have to tell me about the boy!”
As Lisa arrived at work, Julia greeted her enthusiastically.
“So, Lisa,” said Julia, how was your date with Mike?”
“Well,” answered Lisa, “he’s good looking and all. The problem was, he was way too dominating. He totally talked over me the whole time. I wonder if he was compensating for the fact that I was the one who asked him out, but if that’s the case, he can cry me a river. So yeah. No second date.”
“What kind of kisser is he?”
“Oh Julia!” said Lisa, “Forget it! I’m not telling you any of that!”
“Oh come on!” begged Julia, “Just a little…”
“By the way Julia,” said Lisa, “Everything I told you just now, my mom already knows. So, you know, no point in telling her again.”
“Sorry Lisa,” said Julia, “She called last night. She got my mom asking me what happened. She wouldn’t lay off me until I told. I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” said Lisa, “If it wasn’t you, it would be someone else.”
“Still my friend?”
“Of course!”
“Well, sure!” said Bonnie, “Any time a guy doesn’t respect me, I’m heading right for the door. Get out now, or you’d be sorry.”
“I figured you’d see it that way,” said Lisa.
“So wait,” said Julia, “What if he was rich?”
“Oh no!” said Bonnie, “Don’t fall into that trap!”
“Trap?” said Julia, “What do mean? I want to be taken care of.”
“Not how Bonnie sees it,” said Lisa, “I’m pretty much with her here.”
“Earn your own money, girl!” said Bonnie, “You do not want what you think you want!”
“That’s silly,” said Julia, “How do you know…”
“I know it sounds lovely, being in the protection of some powerful man, but it’s a trap! It comes at a price.”
“Well, yeah. He wants to get lucky…”
“Sure,” said Bonnie, “Someone like that considers you an object, and that should certainly be enough to wake you up. But that’s not all.
“Men like that are terrified of you. They live in fear thinking of what you might be capable of. That’s why they go to great lengths to lock you up at all costs. You’ll be cloistered, and it will be a lovely cloister with beautiful gardens and many luxuries, but you’ll be lost there! You will have no choices in life. There will be no escape. It’s a gilded cage!”
Julia looked at Bonnie for a moment in confusion before she broke out in laughter. “Bonnie! You are hilarious! I’d love to see you turn down that guy if that offer comes! I mean…yeah. I know. It’s not like we’re getting it, But…I mean, Yeah, right! You’re hilarious.”
But Bonnie was not laughing, and neither was Lisa. It wasn’t that Lisa completely agreed with Bonnie; while she shared her friend’s distaste for dominating men, she certainly did not think that every rich or dominating man was evil, or a would-be jailer. It was just that she was pretty sure she knew where this talk was coming from. Somewhere in her friend’s past there were terrifying memories that she would never speak of directly. This was one way these stories would come out. Moreover, considering the length of time they had known each other, it seemed unlikely that the experience she was describing had involved a boyfriend at all.
“From the world to your block at The Big Box!” said Bonnie with a smile.
“Uh…thank you?” said the man as he slowly loaded his order on the conveyor belt.
“So how was that?” called Bonnie to Maria. She seemed not to notice the struggle the customer was having.
“Uh…Bonnie?” she called back.
“Here sir,” said Lisa, “I’ll load this fo
r you. Do you need help bringing this order out?”
“Bonnie,” said Maria, “You have to pay attention to things like this. Some customers have special needs.”
Bonnie was silent for a moment. “You’re right, Maria. I’m sorry.”
“Hey!” called the next customer, “Hi! Nice to see you again.”
Bonnie picked up her attention when she heard him, “Oh! Hi.”
It was Hal again. He was with Stacy. “Hi. Second time in a row and you’re taking me again.”
“Well isn’t that lucky,” said Bonnie.
“By the way, my name is Hal Holstein. This is my sister, Stacy.”
“Hi. I’m Bonnie Boring.”
Both Bonnie and Hal smiled at each other quietly for a moment. Finally, Hal broke the silence. “Oh, I’m just buying band-aids. She took a little spill at the park.”
“Oh…”
They looked in each other’s eyes one more time. Hal looked down for a moment, as if he was about to ask Bonnie something. Then he stopped. “Thank you. Very nice to meet you, Bonnie.”
As Hal left, Bonnie watched him intently. He was even better looking than she remembered him. She mouthed to herself, “Bye, Handsome Hal.”
Lisa returned soon after. “Maria!” she called, “I’m back! Sorry it took so long.”
“Hey Lisa,” said Maria, “Don’t worry. I saw. That man was slow. Must have taken you a while to load his order.”
“Uh, well, yeah. That’s one thing. Um, there’s something else.”
“I noticed he was a little rude to you. I’m sorry about that. I’ve seen him before. He’s made some racial slurs.”
“Well, yeah, he did, but it’s not that. I didn’t notice until he pulled out, but he dropped his wallet. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t worry. Happens all the time. We’ll see if he comes back for it…”
“I guess if he doesn’t, I’ll look for I.D. and find him.”
“Seriously? I’ve never done that before. I wouldn’t go that far.”
“He clearly needs help. I can tell. Look, it’s just the right thing to do.”
Ms. Infinity (Book 2): Where Infinity Begins Page 4