by Leddy Harper
There was nothing else like it.
Except maybe a sound.
Kenny stood motionless—eyes wide, mouth gaping, one hand clutched to her chest—and gasped. It was unmistakable. Over the sound of rushing water, over the echo of each splash, I heard her gasp. It was enough to still my heart. Enough to make me stop and take notice. Enough to fill me with a happiness I’d never felt before.
It was like I couldn’t smell or hear prior to her.
Suddenly, I realized that, because of Kenny, I finally understood poetry. She had exposed me to a world where normal words couldn’t begin to describe the colors, sounds, and scents that I experienced when I was around her.
My chest ached, constricted so tightly that I worried my heart would burst like a child’s balloon. She would be leaving in a few days. Taking that world with her. Taking away the colors and sounds and scents. Leaving me with muted senses, as if they refused to function without her.
“Oh my God, Drew. This is beautiful.” Her soft voice, filled with awe, broke through the gloom that had invaded my thoughts.
“The most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen,” I admitted while staring at her, paying no mind to the spray from the falls that acted as a veil between us and the rest of the world.
We were on the backside, locked in an alcove hidden in the rocks. The cascading water warped the soft sunlight, basking us both in an ethereal glow. And when she turned to face me, her eyes glistening, she looked like an angel. My angel.
“How did you ever find this place?”
I fought against the need to move her hair away from her face and tuck it behind her ears. To give my hands something to do, I toyed with the hem of my shirt. “I was just climbing the rocks one day, trying to get closer to the waterfall. I’m sure I can’t be the only person who knows about this place, but in all the years I’ve come, I’ve never seen anyone else.”
“Do you come here a lot?” She sounded out of breath, and I wondered if it was fear or something else. And if it was something else, I desperately wanted to know if it was the same reason I struggled to breathe.
“I did when I was younger. Ever since my responsibilities at the resort increased, I haven’t come here nearly as often as I used to. I don’t really get that much time anymore. I have two days a week, and at least one of those days I go out on the boat.”
She glanced over her shoulder, back at the wall of roaring water, and asked, “So what do you do up here?”
“Whatever. Usually I sit and think, and then I jump.”
“That seems really dangerous. Doesn’t the water drag you down?”
“Not at all. I’ve done this more times than I can count.”
At least she didn’t seem as fearful as she had before we got here. Maybe it was the power of this place—the healing power.
She held out her hand and ran it over the backside of the water, as if touching a solid piece of glass. The wonderment on her face—her parted lips, curved corners of her mouth, sparkling eyes—reaffirmed my decision to share my piece of heaven with her.
With fingertips playing the falling water like a cello, plucking at invisible strings, Kenny glanced my way. A wave of peace seemed to wash over her, or maybe it was her fear melting away, but it happened the same time her sparkling eyes met mine. The definition of absolute happiness curled her lips and colored her cheeks. It was a sight I wanted to breathe in. It was as though I needed it to live, needed it to pump blood through my veins and supply oxygen to my brain. It was a feeling I’d never experienced before. One I never wanted to forget—it was that powerful.
I took one step. Then two.
Then three.
Until I found myself standing directly in front of her. Until her exhales hit my neck and the heat from her body wrapped around me, adding a striking contrast to the cool spray coming off the waterfall next to us.
“So beautiful.” The words floated up my throat, crawled over my tongue, and flew past my lips in a confession delivered in a bundle of air. That familiar veil of embarrassment fell over her face, and it took everything in me not to take her in my arms and show her everything she didn’t have to be embarrassed about.
Instead, I carefully rested my hands on her hips and pulled her to me. As soon as I had her body against mine, her eyes flashed with recognition. She responded by wrapping her arms around my neck, toying with the hair on the back of my head.
She regarded me expectantly. I knew what she wanted, what she anticipated. What she yearned for. But I couldn’t give it to her—not yet. I knew that our interaction would likely be limited after kissing, so I took my time memorizing every feature on her face.
When she realized I wasn’t about to kiss her, she whispered, “What are we doing?”
“Dancing,” I whispered back, as if telling secrets in a room full of people.
“Oh, yeah? What music are we dancing to?”
“You don’t hear it?” I knew she wouldn’t, because unless you make yourself aware of it, it wasn’t noticeable. Taking the lead, I began to sway our bodies to the beat of the dripping water. The roar of it rushing past us, cascading over the rocks. The crash of it falling into the lagoon below. The hums and groans and howls of the white noise ricocheting off the stones surrounding us, the random dimensions adding depth to each echo before it wrapped around us and trapped us in its rhythm.
Dropping her gaze and lowering her chin, she pressed her cheek against my chest.
Without warning, static filled my ears, replacing the sounds of the water we swayed to. Electricity danced over my skin; the outer edges of my sight dimmed. And a calmness settled over me. My chest became light, my breathing effortless, and as if it were possible, every muscle completely uncoiled, softened, went into a state of rest as if falling asleep. It was as though I wasn’t in charge of my body yet remained in complete control of everything.
Like I was attached to strings, and I was the puppeteer.
I stepped into her, making her match each move in the opposite direction. We didn’t stop until I had her back against the wall of water. After gripping her wrists and dragging her arms away from my neck, I once again linked our fingers together and held them out next to her head, against the back of the waterfall. Cold splatter decorated my arms while I held her in place, trapped between me and the sheet of liquid glass. Her body softened when I lowered my face to hers, and there was no mistaking the moan enveloped in a gasp that came from her.
There wasn’t a force on Earth strong enough to hold me back.
No amount of restraint could’ve kept me from her any longer.
I released her hands and cradled her face. In an instant, my mouth covered hers. Kissing Kenny was unlike anything else. Indescribable. The warmth and softness of her lips. The way her tongue met mine. How she gripped the front of my shirt and deepened our connection, and the short intakes of air through her nose. Before I knew it, I had my arms wrapped around her, holding her to me, breathing her in.
She dropped her head and broke the kiss, leaving me lightheaded and hard as steel. With her forehead resting against my prickly chin, waves of heated, panting air hit my neck, which only added to the inferno building within me.
“You’ve got to stop kissing me like that.” Her breathless words were laden with desire she couldn’t hide.
“Why, does it bother you? Do you want me to stop?” My heart pounded against my ribcage like a drum in a parade as I waited for her response.
Instead of pulling away like I assumed she would, she pulled me into her. With her fingers twisted in the front of my white T-shirt, she dragged me closer until her lips found my neck, where she peppered kisses until her mouth reached mine again. That’s when she wrapped her arms around my torso and held me to her.
“We need to hurry up and jump,” she whispered against my lips with her eyes tightly closed. “Before I climb you like a tree.” If it hadn’t been for the lilt of laughter at the end, I would’ve taken her seriously and laid her out to have my way with her.
/>
Instead, we separated, still facing one another. “You sure you’re ready?”
She twisted her lips to the side and squinted her eyes. “No, but yes.”
“We don’t have to jump right now. We could wait a bit longer.”
With a deep inhale—one I wasn’t sure she’d ever release—she moved to stand at my side and grabbed my hand. “Nope. For both of our sakes, we need to jump now.”
I didn’t want this to end, but Kenny was right. If we stayed behind, even for a minute, we’d find ourselves in a situation that would be very uncomfortable on a rock. “Okay, on the count of three…”
Chapter Nine
Kenny
“Wait, wait, wait,” I shouted and took one step back. “As in…one, two, jump? Or we jump after three?” This was pertinent information to have before leaping off a rock to my potential death.
Drew laughed and shook his head, his shoulders jumping as he tried to contain his amusement. “Whichever one you want, Kenny. You pick.”
“All right…one, two, jump.” I hesitantly stepped forward and readied myself again. “One—”
“Wait.” This time, Drew was the one pulling back. “I forgot to tell you that, once you hit the water, let the current weaken before swimming to the top. And make sure to swim outward, away from the falls. Got it?”
“Anything else you forgot to tell me?”
“No,” he said on a chuckle.
I took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a moment. I needed a second to run through his instructions in my head so I wouldn’t forget. But that only seemed to fuel more questions. “What about my shoes?”
He glanced down at my red Converse Shoreline Slips. “What about them?”
“Won’t they make it hard to swim? Especially if I’m caught in a riptide?”
“There aren’t any riptides, Kenny, but if you’re worried, take them off and hold on to them.” He held up one finger in front of my face. “But don’t do that until after you land. Otherwise, you’ll lose them.”
When he prepared to jump again, I tugged on his arm. “What about my clothes?”
He eyed me up and down and said, “You’re wearing athletic shorts and a tank top over a bathing suit. I’m pretty sure getting wet won’t hurt them.”
“I know, but won’t it make it harder to swim?”
This time, Drew didn’t even try to hide his amusement and just barked out deep, throaty laughter that echoed all around me. “Have you ever been swimming before, Kenny? Like, do you even know how?”
“Of course.”
“Then why do you keep assuming things will make it harder?”
I shrugged, unsure where I’d heard it. Probably the same person who told me I had to wait thirty minutes after eating before going swimming, otherwise I’d drown and die. I should remember to thank my mom for that when I called her later.
“Are you ready now? You’re the one who said you didn’t want to wait, yet you’re stalling.”
He was right…I was the one who had suggested we jump now rather than wait. But that was when his warm body was pressed against mine, and I could feel his excitement against my lower belly. We both needed a cold shower to keep from doing something reckless. However, now that I’d calmed down and stood in front of a waterfall I couldn’t see through—couldn’t see how far I had to go until dying upon impact—I began to think that both of my options were reckless at this point. I just had to choose the lesser of two evils.
“As ready as I’ll ever be.” I stepped forward and took a deep breath to ease the pressure in my chest. My heart thundered against my sternum, making my bones feel bruised and battered. And my whole body shook like a pebble near the edge of an earthquake.
Thankfully, Drew took charge. He squeezed my hand, counted to two, and then leaped on three, pulling me with him through the protective wall of water. Without him, I probably wouldn’t have followed through. In fact, without Drew, I wouldn’t have done a lot of things—like steer a boat, climb rocks, or even open up about my family secrets.
To my surprise, the fall was quick. Turns out, we weren’t as high as I thought. Rather than a hundred-foot drop like I had imagined, it couldn’t have been more than fifty feet, or the size of a three-story building.
Drew released my hand just as we sliced through the surface, and as I dove down like a torpedo, I made sure to remember his instructions. I had his voice in my head, and it was enough to keep me centered while I waited for the current to let up. And by the time I reached the surface, I was ready to do it again.
“So what do you do out here after you jump?”
He spewed water from his mouth like a decorative fish on the side of a fountain. “Swim.”
Wading near the sidewall of the small inlet, I glanced around, taking in the sight I couldn’t see before. It wasn’t as big as I’d made it to be in my head, more like the size of a very large pool. Rocks surrounded the lagoon with an opening on one end, directly across from the falls. I assumed that opened up to the river on the other side.
It was so peaceful, so serene, that I wanted to bask in it for as long as I could, but based on the color of the sky, I doubted we’d be able to stay too much longer. So I rolled onto my back and floated toward the center, ears below the surface, and studied the grey clouds above. They weren’t dark, so I knew we still had time before needing to get out.
There was something surreal in feeling weightless with a giant, open sky above. It made me question all sorts of things, such as angels. Do they exist, and if so, what do they do all the time? Do they guard others, or do they spend all their time observing only one person? How many do we each have watching over us? What do they do about really heinous people?
That led to other inquiries. Where do our souls go when we pass on? Do all souls become angels? Or only the good ones? Were angels ever humans, and do they really have wings made of feathers? Does heaven really exist, or were we all fed a fairy tale to tame the barbarians and keep us all from doing bad things?
Obviously, I knew there was no way to answer any of those questions, but I enjoyed contemplating them, nonetheless. Even though I never knew my grandmother, it was a nice feeling to think she was up there watching over me. Proud of me. Guiding me.
I lowered my feet and swirled my arms at my sides to right myself in the water. My ears crackled for a moment before the sounds of nature became clear again. I spun in a circle, looking for Drew, and found him at the mouth of the river, intently staring at something in the distance. Whatever it was had his attention, because he didn’t respond when I shouted his name. So I swam to him, and as the rock barrier between the inlet and the river became shorter and shorter, my eyes grew wider and wider.
Holding onto the rock next to Drew, I pulled myself up as much as I could and gawked at the most awe-inspiring sight in front of us. A wave of grey came off the river, reaching sixty, seventy feet into the sky. It was so dense that I couldn’t see through it, couldn’t see the trees I knew were behind it.
“What’s that?” I was so entranced by what was in front of me that I could barely find my voice, so my question came out as more of a whisper. I worried he hadn’t heard me, considering I had called his name several times not even a minute ago, and he hadn’t heard that.
However, he heard me this time. “A fog wall.”
As we spoke, neither of us took our eyes off the smoky wave that slowly crept our way. And for no reason, we used hushed tones, as if Mother Nature could hear and come after us. I was in awe, but at the same time, I was fearful, contemplating getting out of the water to seek shelter.
“What’s a fog wall?”
“You’ve seen a layer of fog hovering over a field or something, right?”
I nodded, knowing he wasn’t looking but not having the ability to speak.
“Well, it’s like that but vertical instead of horizontal. Wind pushes it across the surface, forcing it to roll into a giant wave. It usually happens over the ocean, where it has more space to grow. The
fact that we’re looking at one over the river is insane.”
“Why?”
“The river isn’t an open area; it has curves and bends with mountains and trees lining it. The wind path should be too obstructed for one to actually form. Really, we shouldn’t be seeing this right now.” Even though he remained still, completely focused on the miraculous sight, his words had left me anxious.
“Um, shouldn’t we get out of the water?”
At first, he shook his head and said, “It won’t do anything to us. It’s literally a giant cloud.” But then he whipped his face in my direction, eyes wide, a bright, halogen bulb practically hovering above him. “I don’t have my phone. It’s in the truck.”
I stared at him for a moment, wondering if he planned to continue that thought, or at least explain why he felt the need to tell me something I already knew. We’d both left our phones in the truck to keep them from getting wet. “And your point is…?”
“Pictures, Kenny! Pictures!” As if that was obvious. “But I’m scared it’ll dissipate before I get back.”
“Get back? Why the hell would you come back here?”
“You can’t get this view from the parking lot. I bet you wouldn’t even be able to see the top of it from there over all the trees.” He glanced at the approaching wall again before suggesting, “Stay here while I run to the truck to get my phone.”
“Are you out of your mind? You want me to stay here by myself in the middle of…of…” I jabbed my finger toward the sky as if annoyingly poking someone to get their attention. “…whatever that is? You just said yourself that it shouldn’t be here, which means it’s probably not as benign as you think.”
“Okay, then can you run to the truck and get my phone?”
My eyes fell to the grin that tugged at the corners of his mouth. This had become entertainment to him, though I wasn’t sure why. “You do realize that if I go to the truck, I’m not coming back, right?”