‘Nah . . . leave it.’
‘Who are you telling what to do? It’s ’er cat, ain’t it?’
‘Whose?’
‘The girl in the pool, stupid. TammyLee. Spoiled bitch.’
The voices got louder and louder as they argued, but I continued staring into the water, waiting for a sardine to appear.
When the footsteps came right up behind me, I swung round and put my tail up, thinking Dylan was going to stroke me. Instead, he grabbed me by the scruff and held me up in the air.
‘Got ’im!’ he shouted. ‘D’you dare me to drop him in the river?’
‘Yeah. Drop ’er cat in the river. That’ll wind ’er up.’
The three of them were laughing loudly and egging each other on. They ran with me, and the boy had one hand clenching my scruff and the other gripping my back so hard his fingers were digging into my kidneys. I struggled and twisted, and flailed my claws, trying to scratch his cruel hands and make him let go of me. My nightmares came back in that moment. Joe chucking us in the hedge, Gretel throwing me out into the frosty night. ‘That’s what happens to bad cats,’ she’d shrieked.
‘Drop ’im from the bridge,’ shouted one of the boys, as their shoes thudded and scuffed as they ran down to the bridge where I’d sat so happily in the sun. I was terrified. I couldn’t believe they were being so cruel to me. ‘Why? Why me?’ My only hope was that TammyLee might rescue me.
Now Dylan was holding me up in the air above the pool.
I looked at his crazy eyes and sent him a message: ‘I saved your baby’s life. Don’t do this to me.’ But his aura had wine-red thorns like a rose in winter. He thought that dropping a cat in the river was going to cover his pain in glory. I glanced down, looking for TammyLee, but she’d gone and so had Max and Amber. My kidneys were hurting like fire, and all I wanted, as he held me over the water, was for him to let go of me – even if I was going to drown, I wanted the agony to stop. It hurt so much that I screamed and he let me go.
I fell down, down into the pool, hearing cheers and laughter and hands clapping. I hit the freezing water and went under, and the shock of it made my heart lurch painfully.
Icy water filled my mouth and rushed up my nose and into my ears. It was the worst experience of my life, even worse than the hot car. I forced my nose up and out of the water and kicked my paws the way I’d seen Amber doing. I didn’t know whether cats could swim, but I tried, even though my fur was full of water and my tail felt heavy as if it would drag me under.
I hated the noise those boys were making. They were laughing at me and chanting: ‘The cat’s in the water! The cat’s in the water!’ And in the distance, TammyLee was screaming.
I swam in crazy circles, fighting the current, which was dragging me towards the weir. The pool looked vast; the banks with sun-warmed stones and grasses seemed far away. My paws got tired, I ached with the cold, my breathing was difficult as I coughed and spluttered.
I don’t know where Amber came from but she hurled herself into the water; the splash threw me all over the place, my neck straining to keep my head up. Then she was swimming vigorously towards me, her eyes bright with concern. She eased her warmth alongside me, and started to push me with her nose, nearer and nearer to the bank, until I crawled out and lay there, limp and shocked, my wet tail thin and shiny like a worm.
Amber crouched down beside me, licking and whining. I heard the boys escaping, the thud-thudding of their feet and the echo of their laughter.
Then, TammyLee came running. She was crying out loud and yelling swear words at the fleeing boys.
‘Poor, poor Tallulah!’ She scooped me up and held me against her warm body, against the vest with the green dragon on it, and my soaking fur was dripping down her jeans. She couldn’t stop crying, and Amber sat beside her, with water streaming from her coat, whining and offering her paw.
‘Thank you, Amber. Thank you. You are a brilliant dog,’ sobbed TammyLee, and she carried me quickly back to Max and Diana, and wrapped me in a warm towel.
‘Those bastard pig boys dropped her from the bridge,’ she wept. ‘How COULD they? How could they hurt Tallulah? She didn’t do anything wrong.’ TammyLee ranted, while I lay, shocked, wrapped in the towel on Diana’s lap. Her voice rose to a scream. ‘What is WRONG with the world? I don’t want to stay in it. Why has some pig of a boy got to ruin the nicest day we’ve had for ages? They won’t get away with it. I’ll find the evil little jerks and chuck them in the river. In fact, I’ll bloody drown them. I’ll . . .’
‘Don’t be ridiculous, girl!’ snapped Max. ‘And stop being a drama queen.’
TammyLee turned on him: ‘Don’t you dare start on me. Don’t you criticise me for caring. You can’t tell me what to do. I’m old enough to quit school and get a job. Then who’s gonna look after Mum?
Max went white. ‘I do know that,’ he said, tight-lipped. ‘This is not an appropriate time to raise major issues.’
I lay there, wishing they would be quiet. TammyLee was more upset than me. Diana put a kindly hand on her daughter’s back as she raged and sobbed.
‘Please try to calm yourself, sweetheart. Tallulah needs us to be quiet and help her recover. She needs healing, not revenge.’
TammyLee calmed down instantly, and Max walked away, tapping at his mobile phone. ‘I’m ringing the police,’ he said. ‘Not that they’ll be interested,’
‘Yes, do that,’ said Diana, ‘but we must focus on this poor cat. We need to get her home, and call the vet.’
‘Tallulah’s not strong,’ said TammyLee, and her hand was still shaking as she touched me, ‘because of what she went through, and look how small she is inside all that fur. Darling cat. I love her so much, Mum, I’d die for her.’
‘I know, I know.’ Diana was smoothing me with the towel, and TammyLee knelt on the ground beside the wheelchair, drying my face and ears with a tissue. All I felt was deep gratitude for being loved like this.
‘She’s purring, Mum! Listen to her.’
At home, TammyLee sat in the garden with me on her lap, helping me recover from my ordeal. The warmth of her body, and the heat of the late-afternoon sun soaked into my bones, and my fur was soon dry and silky, though it smelled of the river. I did a lot of purring, but TammyLee couldn’t stop crying.
‘For goodness’ sake, girl,’ said Max impatiently. ‘The cat’s all right now, surely? You’ve been sitting there blubbing for two hours and there’s work to be done.’
‘I’m not moving. Tallulah needs me. And don’t call me “girl”.’
The flow of healing energy from her hands came to an abrupt end, as if Max’s voice had turned a switch. It wasn’t the first time I’d noticed the deadening effect he had on TammyLee’s spirit. She glared at Max, who stood at the kitchen door with a potato in one hand and a knife in the other.
‘Can’t you get supper for once?’ TammyLee snarled. ‘Or have you got to watch the boring old news? Again!’
‘No. As it happens, I’ve got to do boring old work to earn us boring old money to buy boring old food and pay boring old bills!’ shouted Max. He dropped the potato and it rolled, wobbling across the patio. I watched it, thinking about playing with it, and Max noticed the change in my body language.
‘There you are. Look at her. She wants to play again.’
‘No, she doesn’t.’ TammyLee scooped me into her arms and stood up. ‘I’m taking her upstairs. And you don’t need to PEEL POTATOES, Dad. Just get the chips out of the freezer, like the rest of us do.’
‘You treat that cat like a child,’ complained Max. My gaze emanated disapproval as I was carried upstairs. He couldn’t know how much that hurt TammyLee. How could he, when he didn’t know she’d lost the child she could have loved?
TammyLee put me down on her duvet and wound a fuzzy scarf round and round me like a bird’s nest. ‘You stay there, Tallulah. I’ve got to put Mum to bed.’ She sighed. ‘Meow if you want me.’
I watched her go into Diana’s room, and I wanted
to follow her. But the warmth of the scarf was so sumptuous, and the rainbow colours of it seemed to be whirling round me. I was giddy, and the pain in my bruised kidneys was hard and sharp, as if Dylan’s fingers were still clenched around my spine. Without TammyLee there, I was suddenly afraid. What if he had damaged me? What if I couldn’t eat or pee? With that thought came an aftershock of pure misery. Why had that boy wanted to hurt and frighten me?
I sent out a telepathic scream to my angel, and she was there instantly, weaving her light into the rainbow scarf as she floated over the duvet.
‘There is a reason,’ she said. ‘You have been hurt to make something happen, to help you with your mission, Tallulah.’
Grumpy and tired, I didn’t respond the way you should do to an angel.
‘What mission?’ I growled, despite knowing perfectly well what it was.
‘Remember, you came here to re-unite TammyLee with her child.’
‘I wish I’d never come here.’ The words heaved out of me like a cloud over the sun. It was an old familiar feeling – depression. The last time I’d had it was after Gretel left me in the car.
‘If it was an accident, I could deal with it,’ I said to my angel. ‘But I feel it’s bigger than that. I’m carrying the cruelty from across the world . . . all the hurt . . . it’s not physical. It’s coming to me from thousands of cats who’ve been tormented by humans.’
‘Purr,’ said my angel. ‘Come on, purr yourself to sleep, and I will take you on a celestial journey. You will awake with new knowledge.’
‘Knowledge!’ I moaned, and another wave of despair engulfed my spirit. ‘I never needed knowledge before. A cat knows everything it needs. But I don’t know HOW I can possibly do the mission I agreed to. How can a cat manage to re-unite a mum with her baby? I can’t tell TammyLee where Rocky is.’
‘This knowledge will be given in spirit,’ said my angel. ‘Now, do as I asked. Purr.’
My first purr came out as a complaint, and it hurt right through my body.
‘Listen,’ said my angel. ‘Listen to the shining cats purring out there in another dimension.’
Relaxing a little, I listened, and, at first, heard only a murmur of voices from Diana’s room, and, from downstairs, the sound of Amber’s tail banging against the fridge and the snip-snip of scissors as Max cut off bits of bacon for her.
My angel began to hum a lullaby to me and a delicious drowsiness melted my pain into slumber. In my sleep, I heard the heavenly purring, saw the thistledown faces of spirit cats, their eyes like lamps burning around me, illuminating my dreams with an incandescence that was both healing and inviting.
‘Am I dying?’ I asked, but there was no answer except the humming, the purring and the whirling colours of the scarf. My angel kept repeating something like a mantra: ‘There is a reason, a reason . . .’ Her words became a cushion of stars, carrying me high above the house and the garden, above the river and the hills, then through the sky, faster and faster. So fast that the stillness of my sleep was tightly tucked around me, keeping me safe.
My spirit was intact, yet I felt like two cats who were separating. One was flying gloriously through endless sparkles, the other was lying limp and lifeless on TammyLee’s bed. From some distant place, I watched TammyLee come back into her bedroom and look closely at that tabby-and-white cat. ‘That’s me,’ I thought. ‘But I’m not supposed to die yet.’
Her long fingers slipped through my fur, the witchy-green nails shining. Her hand was suddenly still and she seemed to be listening, her face going pale like one of the cream roses in the garden.
‘Don’t die on me, Tallulah,’ she whispered. ‘Please, Tallulah.’
I saw the panic in her eyes, but I was detached, still in that distant starry place, no longer flying, but floating, closer and closer to the sequinned edges of my true home, the spirit world, where I was the Queen of Cats. Why had I ever left? I yearned to go back.
‘Why can’t I go in?’ I asked my angel.
‘It is not your time,’ she replied, and I searched her silver eyes for an explanation. ‘You are a brave cat, a bright spirit and you CAN complete your mission. Help is on the way. Feel the hand that is touching you.’
I focussed on TammyLee’s hand and it was trembling as she caressed the silky fur over my heart. She lay down and put her ear against me, the bobble of her earring pressing into me. She was listening for a heartbeat.
‘Purr,’ said my angel, but I couldn’t. I gazed at her. In her full colours, she was dazzling. ‘You are very ill, but remember, there is a healer for you. She gave you your name, Tallulah.’
A face drifted into my mind, manifesting through the web of stars, the girl with the long dark plait and the blazing light: Roxanne!
‘Send out the call,’ said my angel. ‘And she will come.’
‘I can’t,’ I said. ‘I can’t even purr.’
‘You can. You can think. And thinking has power. Think of Roxanne. Hold her face in your dreams. Tell her you need help.’
‘But it doesn’t work like that with humans,’ I argued.
‘Thinking has power. Just do it.’
I held Roxanne’s face in my mind, tightly in my dreams as the angel had said. At the same time I watched the pandemonium in the house as TammyLee flew into a panic. She carried me downstairs.
‘Dad . . . DO something. She’s dying.’
‘Don’t be RIDICULOUS.’
‘WHY can’t you believe me, Dad?’
Max came and looked at my limp body, and Amber came creeping along the floor, whimpering. I felt Max change from being angry to being the organiser.
‘Put her in the car. We’ll take her to the vet. Now,’ he said. ‘It might not be too late.’
I didn’t want to go in a car. I hated the vet. But I had no choice. Limp and hardly breathing, I could only lie in TammyLee’s arms as Max quickly locked the house door, got in and revved the engine, the wheels scrunching on gravel.
‘Focus on the healer,’ said my angel, and I held Roxanne in my mind.
‘Who are you phoning?’ Max asked sharply, as TammyLee tapped at her mobile in the car. ‘Damn these bloody traffic lights, they’re always bloody well red. Come on. Come on.’
Cats do believe in miracles. I’d forgotten about them. But one was happening right now in the back of Max’s speeding car.
‘Roxanne,’ said TammyLee.
She was phoning Roxanne. My angel was right! I’d sent out the call in my thoughts, and it must have arrived.
I heard Roxanne’s voice come through the phone. A mobile phone is a bit crude, but it’s the nearest thing humans have to real telepathy.
‘Penny from Cat’s Protection gave me your number,’ explained TammyLee, half talking, half crying. ‘Do you remember a tabby-and-white fluffy cat? Tallulah?
‘Of course! Beautiful Tallulah. I’m tuning into her right now.’ replied Roxanne. ‘What’s happened?’
‘These EVIL boys got hold of her and threw her . . . threw her . . .’ TammyLee couldn’t speak for the sobs of rage gusting through her as she remembered my ordeal.
‘Take a deep breath,’ said Roxanne.
‘In the river,’ TammyLee said. ‘We’re taking her to the vet right now. But it’s more than that, Roxanne . . . it . . . it’s deep emotional stuff . . . the hell of being bullied . . . and, God knows, I should understand THAT.’ She took another gulp of air.
‘Can we not have another drama when I’m driving?’ Max asked wearily.
‘She’s my best friend,’ explained TammyLee, ignoring Max. ‘She didn’t do anything. We got her out and dried her off, but I’m frightened they’ve hurt her in some other way . . . b . . . broken her back or something terrible . . . she hasn’t walked or put her tail up, and she’s gone limp.’
‘I’m not getting that,’ said Roxanne. ‘I’m sensing she’s bruised and shocked . . . see what the vet has to say and I’ll come over when you’ve got her home. Where do you live?’
‘Oh, thanks, Roxann
e. River Cottage, just off the big roundabout by the park. Thanks, you’re a star!’
The next thing I knew was the smell of the vet’s place, the wailing of cats in cages in the waiting room, the cold of the table they put me on. The fear and the silence while he examined me with gentle hands, pulling each paw, checking my tail, squeezing my sore tummy. When he did that, it hurt and I heard myself let out a long mewling cry.
‘She’s bruised,’ he said. ‘Her legs are OK but she doesn’t want to stand up, does she? We’ll do a scan.’
While he was running the scanner over me, I could feel Roxanne coaxing me back from where I still hovered, gazing longingly into the spirit world.
‘I think she’s basically OK,’ the vet said, ‘but shock can affect cats very badly . . . worse than a human. I’ll give her a mild sedative and she’ll sleep for a few hours. Take her home and keep her warm.’
I opened my eyes then and saw TammyLee’s anxious face, and the glint of her bangles as she stroked me gently under the chin.
I remembered how much I loved her and I was so pleased to see her there, looking after me, that I managed a purr-meow.
‘Magic puss cat,’ she said, and smiled at me.
I was back.
The long sleep did me good, and, when I awoke, I found myself back on the bed with the rainbow scarf wound around me, and TammyLee was bringing Roxanne into the bedroom.
The two girls sat one each side of me and I felt as if the sun itself had come into the room. I wanted to love them both, so I stood up, stretched, and wove my way to and fro between them, rubbing my head against them, my tail brushing their bare arms.
‘She’s much better,’ said TammyLee. ‘Listen to her purring. Maybe she doesn’t need healing now.’
‘We’ll see,’ said Roxanne, and she picked me up and held me against her heart. ‘Sometimes, animals want to talk to me. I can hear their voices by telepathy.’
‘Can you? Wow! What do you want me to do?’
‘Just be here . . . and listen. If she wants me to, I’ll tell you what she’s saying. Please be very still and quiet.’
As before, Roxanne closed her eyes and talked to me in a language I understood: telepathy. First, we talked about the boys dropping me in the river and whether I hated them for it.
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