by Lynn Ames
“Mmm,” Kate hummed. “As if I could forget.” She returned the favor, saying, “That’s to remind you how very much I love you. Be careful over there, sweetheart.”
“I will. You too, Stretch. I miss you already.”
“Me too.”
“Bye.”
“Be safe, love.” Kate waited until she saw her lover catch a taxi from the living room window. Only then did she go to the door of the apartment, looking back one last time. “Never forget how much I love you, sweetheart. You will forever own my soul, and in my heart we will always be together. Goodbye, Jay.”
She couldn’t stop the tears then. She didn’t want to.
A while later Kate was on a train headed back home. She had just taken a window seat from which she could watch the river when she felt a presence standing over her.
“If it isn’t my very favorite celebrity. I just knew there had to be some advantage to coming to this conference in the city. Is this seat taken?”
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Kate looked up into the smiling countenance of Dr. Barbara Jones.
Although she wasn’t sure she was really up to company, the ex-anchorwoman was grateful for the appearance of one of her best friends.
“Depends on who’s asking.”
“Ooh, you sound rough, there, kiddo. Having a tough day?” the doctor asked sympathetically, noting that her friend still wore sunglasses, even inside the train, something that was way out of character for her.
“I suppose you could say that.”
“Well, I got my copy of Time magazine yesterday, and I happened to catch the cover of that filthy gossip rag a little while ago at a newsstand as I was passing the time in the train station, so I think I can imagine a little bit of what might be going on in that brilliant head of yours.”
Reaching out, she put her hand on Kate’s arm. “Want to talk about it?
I’m a great listener, as you know.”
Kate stared out the window, not sure how much to share, even with her good friend.
“Let me start, then,” Barbara said. “It’s nearly 4:30 in the afternoon, and you’re sitting on a train in ripped jeans and a t-shirt. That tells me that you’re not going to work today. You don’t have any luggage with you, or even a briefcase, so that tells me that this is a day trip, and that you probably didn’t pre-plan it, but came to the city to do something specific. Like maybe talk to the other person in that picture, who I do believe, if I’m not mistaken, is someone you introduced me to not that long ago in the middle of a very long night.”
Kate’s head snapped around.
“How am I doing so far?” The doctor gave her friend a wry smile. “It is Jay, isn’t it?”
Kate nodded minutely. “How did you know?”
“Well, I didn’t need to be Sherlock Holmes to see the way you looked at each other that night. I figured if something wasn’t already going on between you two, it would be soon.” She lowered her voice. “I’m glad for you, Kate, she seems like a wonderful person, and you deserve nothing less.”
“Thanks. That picture was taken on the day I proposed to her. We were on a beach in St. John.”
“You’re getting married? That’s fantastic! Congratulations.”
Kate sighed. “We were getting married.”
“What do you mean?”
“Barbara, no one else has figured out that she’s the other woman, and I intend to keep it that way. She has a great career ahead of her, and her whole life, and I’m not going to screw that up for her.”
“You’re leaving her? Have you told her that? Is that why you were in the city?”
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“Not exactly. I needed to make sure she was all right and that she knew what had happened. I also needed to tell her that I got fired this morning.”
“What?”
“They invoked the morals clause in my contract. It seems they were getting some threats from advertisers who were going to pull spots, and it was going to cost them money that they didn’t want to lose more than they didn’t want to lose me.”
“Those ungrateful sons of bitches. Who the hell do they think got them those advertising contracts in the first place! They were in the cellar until you came along and gave them some class. You made them number one, and this is how they repay you?”
Kate had to smile at her friend’s righteous indignation. “All’s fair in love, war, and television news, I guess,” she said resignedly.
“That’s a load of bull and you know it. Tell me the whole story.”
And Kate did.
When she was finished, Barbara whistled. “That took guts, woman, to tell them it was your fiancée and that who she was wasn’t any of their business. You were right, of course.”
“When I saw that even Les and Phil, who had met her and spent time with her, didn’t know who it was, I knew she could be okay in all this.
That was the one bright spot.”
“What’s your plan?”
Kate explained about Jay’s assignment and her intention to get away for a while.
“Where are you going?”
“I don’t want to say. The less people know, the better,” she said bluntly.
“This is me we’re talking about, Kate, not some fly-by-night acquaintance,” Barbara said, a little bit annoyed. “Does Jay know where you’re headed?”
“No, and that’s the way I want it. I’ve set it up so we’ll both be talking to Peter at some point every day. If there’s an emergency he can be the point person for a two-way conference call. If she knew where I was she might try to find me.”
“Might? I don’t think there’s any question that she’d move Heaven and Earth to locate you. Why are you doing this?”
“I told you,” Kate sighed exasperatedly, “if we’re not seen together, she’ll be safe and she’ll be able to maintain her anonymity. If she shows up anywhere near me, someone will make the connection and she’ll be exposed. It could ruin her career.”
“Instead, you’re going to ruin her life.”
“What?”
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“Kate, that woman loves you with all her heart. Do you think she’s just going to be able to forget about you, put you in the past? Your disappearing is going to kill her. My guess is she’d rather lose her job than lose you, and if you were thinking straight you’d know that too. Did you even give her a choice?”
“No,” she answered quietly. “She doesn’t know I’m planning an extended absence.”
“Well that’s a fine euphemism. She’s a big girl; don’t you think she should have some say in what happens here? What gives you the right to make decisions for both of you?”
Kate ran a hand through her hair. She couldn’t listen to this, not after spending the morning asking herself the very same questions. God, she felt so impotent. “Look. All I know is that I’m the juicy story of the day, and every idiot and his brother is going to try to dig up more dirt. The most obvious piece of gossip would be the identity of my lover, and if they figure that out it will raise questions about the reliability of the story she wrote. That woman bent over backwards to make that piece objective and fair. She has more integrity in her little finger than most people have in their entire bodies. I won’t have anyone call that into question. It would kill her personally and professionally. I will do anything it takes to make sure the vultures don’t find her, and that includes disappearing out of her life so that she can have the future and career she deserves.”
Barbara reached out a soothing hand, recognizing that her friend was about at the end of her emotional tether. At least, she reasoned, Peter would be able to bridge a little bit of the gap and maybe talk some sense into her. Kate had introduced her to the security expert a year or so earlier, and the three of them occasionally did things together. She liked him and knew he was as protective of their friend as she was. “Kate, they’re not going to be out there gunning for you f
orever. Don’t give up your chance at happiness because some money-grubbing opportunists are making you the meal of the day. Two days from now or a week from now they’ll move on to someone else and all of this will be forgotten.”
“And what if you’re wrong and it isn’t? I can’t take a chance on that.
You can never put the genie back in the bottle, Barbara. I’ll never be able to go anywhere without someone pointing and saying, ‘Look, there goes that famous lesbian. What’s her name again?’ Jay doesn’t deserve that, and she doesn’t have to live with it.”
“All I’m saying is that it should be her choice whether she wants to stay with you and face the consequences or not. It doesn’t matter where you go, Kate, she’s going to try to follow you. I know that I would if it were me, and she seems like a pretty determined young woman. Do you love her?”
“With all that I am.”
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“Does she love you?”
“Yes.”
“Then don’t give up and let those fools win. Because that’s what you’re doing.”
“Do me a favor?”
“Anything.”
“Watch out for her? She says that she wants to be in Albany because that’s where our home is, and I think that’s where she’ll go when she comes back from her assignment later this week. Will you check up on her, make sure she’s okay? Try,” Kate’s voice broke, “try to help her through this? She’s going to need some friends who know and understand. I can’t think of anyone I’d trust to help her more than I trust you and Peter.”
“Thanks for the vote of confidence. You know I will do anything I can, but I do wish you’d reconsider. I think you’re making the mistake of a lifetime, or maybe it’s just that you don’t think you deserve happiness and love in your life.”
Kate glared at Barbara with an intensity that was clear even through the dark glasses. “Since when did you start specializing in psychology?”
she snapped.
“My friend, I’ve been watching you for a lot of years now, and I’ve seen enough to know that what I say is true, although I still don’t understand why. Well let me tell you something: you do deserve to be loved and to be happy, despite what you think. This woman is the best thing that ever came into your life. Don’t let her go; I’m not sure either one of you could survive it.”
Kate knew it was true; Jay was the best thing that ever happened to her, and she wasn’t at all sure she could make it without her. She only knew that she had to protect her, and this was the only way she knew how. Out loud she said, “Jay’s a survivor, she’ll adapt and find her way.
She’s tougher than she looks.” And she hoped it was true.
Barbara just shook her head, knowing that she wasn’t going to be able to change her friend’s mind, but hoping that she’d at least given her something to think about.
They were silent for the rest of the ride to Albany.
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CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
ay arrived at her destination just in time to see the sun come up on J Wednesday. She had tried her hardest to sleep on the flight but found it virtually impossible, as thoughts and emotions kept running rampant through her mind. She couldn’t shake the feeling of dread gripping her heart and was finding it difficult to focus on her assignment when all she could think about was where her lover might be and when she could see her next. Parker, you owe it to these men and their crewmates to do a good job here. Stick to the issue at hand and the faster you complete the assignment properly, the sooner you can go home and concentrate on Kate.
She found a driver willing to take her from Frankfurt, where she had landed, to the US military hospital at Wiesbaden, and spent the ride going through her notes. When the writer arrived, she was forced to spend an hour slogging through mountains of red tape and “helpful”
public affairs officers, despite earlier assurances from her sources at the Pentagon that she would have no problems on site. Once she had convinced the watchdogs that her interest lay in the sailors’ personal stories and not in vilifying the navy or condemning the military’s readiness for an attack, she was allowed to visit with three of the injured.
The interviews went well, the men responding instantly to Jay’s naturally sunny personality and good looks. They were happy to open up to her and talk about their lives, their choice to join the military, how they viewed that decision after the attack, what they’d felt and thought during the attack, and how they thought the incident on the Stark might have changed them.
By early afternoon she had gotten everything she needed to write a great human-interest story, and she had a choice to make. Rightfully, she could do some sightseeing, check into a hotel in Frankfurt, and sleep until the next day before catching a plane back to the States. Or, if she were so inclined, she could leave right away. Unbidden the thought came to her that if a certain tall shadow were there, they would have a great 235
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time seeing the sights. But, alas, that wasn’t the case. Looking at her watch she noted that it was 8:00 a.m. New York time. She smiled at the vision of Kate working out to Charlie’s Angels in the basement gym, her smile fading, however, with the notion that her lover had probably already left for parts unknown. She sighed. The first thing she needed to do was to call Trish to find out if there was a second leg to her journey to cover a service for those who had died in the attack. Since the editor was usually in early, Jay figured she wouldn’t have any trouble finding her at her desk.
“Hiya, kiddo. How’s tricks?”
“Hi, Trish. Everything’s great. I think I’ve got some really good stuff; it’ll make a great sidebar. These guys have been through a lot and, as you might expect, it’s had a pretty profound impact on them. It’s a very human story.”
“Terrific. Listen, I got a line on the memorial service. It’s going to be Friday morning at the Naval Station Mayport near Jacksonville, Florida.
That’s the Stark’s home base. Looks like the president is going be there.
And guess what? So are you, what a coincidence!”
“You’re in a good mood.”
“Eh, doesn’t pay to complain, you know what I mean?”
“Yeah, I do. Okay. Well, I’ll come home now so I can write this story tomorrow in the office and then get on a plane for Florida tomorrow night.”
“Sorry about that, kid, doesn’t look like you’ll be getting a lot of sleep this week.”
“That’s okay, Trish, I know you’ll make it up to me,” she smiled into the phone. Her editor and friend really did take pretty good care of her.
Jay was exhausted, and her stomach was in knots. She thought about trying to call Kate, but knew in her heart it would be fruitless. She would call Peter when she got to New York later. While it would be near 10:00
or 11:00 Wednesday night in Germany when she touched down, it was six hours earlier at home, putting it closer to 4:00 or 5:00 in the afternoon in New York.
By 8:00 Wednesday morning Kate was somewhere over the midwest on her way to Chicago and then Denver, the jumping-off point for her journey. It had been a long evening and a longer night after she’d returned from Jay’s. She had gone from the train station to her travel agent, then to her florist, then to the house to feed Fred, play with him, get his things together, and take him over to Peter’s, where she had dinner and more discussion than she bargained for.
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Like Barbara, Peter was convinced that Jay would try to follow her and not at all certain that Kate’s solution was best for either one of them.
The ex-anchorwoman was tired, emotionally drained, and grumpy.
“What do you suggest, then, smart man? Let them feast on us and have Jay lose her career in the process? Never. I won’t do it.”
“You don’t know that Jay will lose her career, you’re making an assumption. And that should be her choice, not yours.”
It
was the first time they had ever raised their voices to each other.
They faced off across Peter’s kitchen table, where Kate’s meal sat untouched. “Jay is too kind and too compassionate, she would never choose her career over me, even if it was what she really wanted. I will not be pitied; I am not some charity case.”
“Then stop feeling sorry for yourself and playing the martyr,” he boomed. More quietly he pleaded, “Go away for a few days and get your head together if you need to, Kate, but for God’s sake, don’t disappear from Jay’s life. That girl is head over heels in love with you and can’t wait to be your wife.” He thought about the little side trip the pretty blonde had made them take the previous night when they’d gone to dinner. “The two of you are strong enough to face whatever challenges come your way. Your friends will be here to support you. If you want, I’ll arrange it so that no media can get within a mile of either one of you.”
“I know you would, my friend, but even you can’t hold them off forever,” she said quietly. “I’ll ask you the same thing I asked Barbara: please, please look out for Jay and help her through this. I will take you up on your offer to make sure that no media go anywhere near her. I don’t think anyone who would be looking for a story can figure out where I live, but I can’t guarantee that. I’m hoping that by making my departure from the capital district painfully obvious, they’ll trail me instead.” She hadn’t made any secret about the fact that she was leaving the area and had, in fact, called the station earlier in the day, deliberately telling the receptionist that she was leaving the next morning at 7:00 for an extended period of time to visit relatives in Chicago if anyone called looking for her. She might as well put the idiot’s helpful nature to good use.
She sighed heavily. “Jay will be calling you; I trust you not to tell her where I am. You’re the only person who will know. I’ll be moving around, so I’ll check in with you once a day, most likely in the evening after you would have talked to her. You’re my eyes and ears, my friend, so if there’s something I need to know I expect you to tell me.”
She stood and Fred rose from under the table where he had been lying on her feet. She knelt down before him and gave him a big hug. “As for you, big guy, I expect you to be a good boy. When your other mother 237