Cowboy Samurai X Badass Android
By KuroKoneko Kamen
Copyright 2012 by KuroKoneko Kamen
Cover Design by GENZOMAN
Other works by the author:
Young Adult:
Bitch Heiress X Samurai Butler
Bitch Heiress X2 Samurai Butler
Sir Genkaku Host Club: books 1, 2, 3 and 4
Coming Soon: 2013
Rockstar Ghost (a paranormal romance)
Adult:
Sanky Panky Pirate
Other:
How to make a guy fall in love with you on facebook
Chapter 1: Truth, Porn, and the American Way
17-year-old Jake Lonestar was a typical lazy, perverted American teenager who lived in Amarillo, Texas. He liked to laze around his house and avoid doing his chores at the Lonestar Ranch just like any other rebellious teen. While listening to Galaxy Girl’s latest hit song being blasted from his sister Bonnie’s room, Jake would enjoy staying cooped up in his room while jerking off to naked photos of the now famous pop star.
Before Galaxy Girl had become really famous she had done these racy photos for Playboy magazine - something that Jake thanked God for every day.
Yep, Jake was a normal, horny American teenager - except for the fact that if he so much as touched an electronic device or appliance something strange would happen.
The device would wig out and transform into an alien killer robot!
If that wasn’t bad enough, there were other times when Jake’s body produced random bouts of magnetism causing all metal objects in the near vicinity to suddenly fly his way.
When this happened while he was in the kitchen one day he ended up dodging kitchen knives and praying he wouldn’t get skewered. I feel your pain, Magneto. Jake thought to himself as his back was pressed up against the kitchen door and knives surrounded his body. That had been close - too close.
Because of Jake’s strange abilities, Jake’s family and friends ostracized him. Jake sighed sadly as he remembered that when he was younger he and his tomboy sister, Bonnie, had always been glued together. But all that changed after the ‘incident’ - a memory that Jake kept buried deep inside of his psyche. He didn’t want to remember what had been the cause of his strange abilities.
Jake had been 10-years-old when the incident occurred that resulted in three of Jake’s classmates being killed. Jake remembered who they were but not the incident. Their names had been - Stuart, Joe and Jimmy. They had been the school bullies and Jake had been their favorite target. After Jake had been found with their dead bodies, Jake had supposedly come up with some unbelievable and outlandish story, which sent him straight to the Austin State Hospital - a nice name for an insane asylum.
For some reason the asylum only held Jake for a few months before they released him and Jake was able to go back to school. The rest of middle school was a blur and then Jake was entering high school. Everyone in Amarillo High School knew of the incident and because of this they all thought of Jake as a violent and crazy guy.
During his high school days, Jake Lonestar was avoided, openly ignored and shunned.
He was treated as if he didn’t exist. As if he were a ghost, sitting in the classroom that no one else could see.
It really was like being dead.
Jake took it all in stoically and appeared to be unaffected by this harsh treatment. But the truth was that Jake was lonely and misunderstood. He wished he had friends…could have friends like a normal teen, but…ever since the incident he was anything but normal. His mere touch would turn electronic devices into alien robots and he had superhuman strength, which caused him to accidentally destroy things from time to time including his own desk or chair! The teachers thought Jake was a juvenile delinquent because of his destructive nature, and assumed he was playing ‘pranks’ when Jake’s desk would suddenly fall to pieces.
Jake was labeled a troublemaker.
Jake was misunderstood.
Jake wouldn’t hurt a fly. He was a coward. Afraid of his own shadow even if he possessed extraordinary abilities and superhuman strength. This change inside of him hadn’t changed Jake’s original personality from when he used to be a wimpy, lanky 10-year-old boy who had been bullied by kids stronger than him. Jake had always been weak and so even after the incident, Jake still considered himself weak even though that was far from the truth.
Even when, 17-year-old Jake saw his reflection in the full-length mirror in his room - that reflection was not the way Jake Lonestar mentally viewed himself.
The reality was that Jake Lonestar was a handsome young man - 6’ 3”, 130 pounds, zero percent body fat, muscular physique, 6-pack abs. He had chiseled facial features surrounded by shaggy brown hair, and his eyes were golden brown. He looked tall, attractive, powerful, and confident, and because of his reputation of being a ‘crazy murderer’ he appeared ‘threatening’.
If the teenaged girls in his school hadn’t been so afraid of him they would have been drooling over him.
In his mind, however, Jake saw himself completely differently. He was still the lanky, wimpy, short, 10-year-old boy that used to get bullied. He was still weak…powerless…cowardly…harmless…
At this time, Jake didn’t even remember the ‘incident’ since he had buried those memories deep within himself. He didn’t know how his classmates had been murdered but he was certain he didn’t do it. He would never have done such an awful thing! Just thinking about it made his stomach queasy.
He wasn’t a crazy murderer…
If only he could get his classmates to see this…then maybe he could make some friends.
But to do this Jake had to be super careful. He couldn’t use his super strength no matter what and he would have to stay away from electronic appliances at all costs!
Over the next few months, Jake had been doing a pretty good job of ‘acting normal’, until one day…
Jake never ate his lunch in the cafeteria - it was too painful. No one would ever sit with him and everyone ignored or acted like he wasn’t there. If Jake tried to join a table where some of his classmates were already seated, they would silently get up and walk away to go sit at another table, leaving him behind, alone.
Because of this, Jake was constantly walking around the school in an aimless manner during lunch break while trying to find a place where he could eat his lunch in peace. Jake found a nice spot under a tree and ate his lunch there. After he had finished he lay down on the grass and looked up at the blue sky as fluffy white clouds lazily floated past. It was the perfect day for cloud gazing - one of Jake’s favorite pastimes. Jake could just relax and do absolutely nothing. It was something that he could do without bothering or hurting anyone. Doing nothing is the best. Jake thought to himself.
Jake looked down at his watch and realized that he had to get back to class. He stood up and dusted himself off of a few dead leaves, and headed back for the main school building. But just as he was passing the side of the building he spotted a few of the guys from the baseball club standing in a circle as if they were surrounding something.
Curious, Jake sneakily got closer to the group and peered over their shoulders to see what they were all looking at.
A pretty blonde girl (Jake thought he remembered her name as being Kimberly) with blue eyes and big boobs was in the center of the circle, giving the guys around her wary looks. Her shirt was low-cut and her skirt scandalously short…but that was the fashion these days, so Jake shrugged it off. Kimberly was one of the most popular girls in school and the captain of the cheerleading team.
The guys from the baseball club were in their uniforms and happened to have their baseball bats with them i
n their hands. Jake figured that they had probably been practicing during their lunch break. They were murmuring something amongst themselves, and some of the guys were chuckling darkly as they closed in around the girl. Jake didn’t like the feeling of where this was going.
One guy (Jake recognized him as being Carl) stepped forward and using his baseball bat began to lift Kimberly’s skirt up.
“Stop…” Kimberly begged softly.
Carl raised a blonde eyebrow at her. “Stop? You know you don’t want me to. Going around dressed like that…like a whore. You’re asking for it. We all know you want it, so let’s have some fun. First, let’s see what color your slut panties are.” Carl continued as he raised her skirt a little higher…
The other boys were egging their friend on. Kimberly’s pretty blue eyes began to fill with tears.
Jake had seen enough.
He hated bullies.
“H-h-hey.” Jake stuttered as he called out to get the boys’ attention.
The boys all turned to see Jake - noticing his presence for the first time…
Their eyes widened like saucers as they realized that none other than Jake Lonestar was in their midst! Jake Lonestar - the crazy guy that was said to have gone berserk when he was 10-years-old and killed three of his classmates.
The crazy murderer…!
The fear shone in their eyes.
But Jake was probably more afraid of them than they were of him! His body was trembling with fear…he clenched his fists at his sides to stop his shaking, fearing that they would notice.
But to the boys in the baseball club it looked like Jake was trembling with rage.
“W-w-what do you think you’re doing? Leave that girl alone.” Jake stumbled over his words and they sounded weak to his ears. Jake gulped.
The boys in the baseball club put aside their fear of Jake for a moment to assess the situation. There were five of them and Jake was alone. They even had their baseball bats with them. Lucky.
“Well, lookie what we have here. If it isn’t Jake Lonestar - the crazy murderer but what’s this? He’s all alone as usual, and there are five of us. I say we put this freak in his place once and for all!” Carl boldly started forward towards Jake, tapping his baseball bat across his shoulder blades casually. “You want us to leave her alone? Why do you even care, crazy freak?”
The other boys began to murmur in agreement. Their hatred for Jake surpassed their fear of him. They truly believed Jake was responsible for the deaths of Stuart, Joe and Jimmy, and that the police should have locked Jake away for life or given him the lethal injection - not send him to some mental institution only to let him go free after only a couple of months.
“Yea, let’s punish the murderer,” another boy agreed.
“Let’s get him!”
“Let’s give him a taste of his own medicine. Pain.” Carl swung his bat down off his shoulders, and letting out a yell brought his bat down upon Jake.
“H-h-hey…stop…” Jake stammered as his reflexes took over. He found himself catching the bat before it hit him and shoving Carl backwards with enough force to send him flying backwards and to the ground, where he sat temporarily dazed.
“I-I don’t want to hurt you.” Jake tried to explain.
“Bastard!” One of the boys came at Jake from behind and raising his bat high in a two-handed grip brought the bat down on the top of Jake’s head.
BAM.
The baseball bat shattered upon impact with Jake’s head and splinters flew at the boy’s face and got into his eyes, blinding him.
“Ah! My eyes! Dammit!” The boy cried out.
Jake turned around, perplexed by what had just happened. He saw the boy rubbing his eyes in pain and frowned.
“You freak!” Another boy roared as he ran at Jake with his baseball bat raised.
Jake unconsciously brought his forearm up to block the attack and as the bat hit Jake’s arm it was broken in half.
Jake watched this happen in shock and awe.
He had to get those baseball bats away from them before someone got hurt.
As another boy attacked Jake with his baseball bat Jake made a grab for the bat and pulled it out of the boy’s hands. Jake gripped the baseball bat nervously and accidentally shattered it to pieces in his bare hands.
The baseball players (except for Carl who was still dazed on the ground and the other boy who was still blinded) all took a step back, thinking that Jake was making some kind of violent threat towards them…
Jake sprinkled the pieces of baseball bat on the ground in front of him and wiped his hands off - not knowing in the least just how menacing his actions looked.
“Shit! He really is a monster!” “Let’s get the hell out of here!” “He’s a violent maniac! He’ll kill us!” The boys cowered as they took several steps away from Jake. They then helped the dazed Carl and the temporarily blinded boy to their feet.
Jake frowned at their words wondering why they were suddenly so afraid. Jake took a step towards them, trying to explain. “Hey, wait. I-”
“RUN!” The boys took off running, helping to support their friends and planning to head for the nurse’s office.
Jake scratched his head and turned to face Kimberly who the guys had forgotten all about.
“Hey, are you al-” Jake began to ask as he approached Kimberly.
But as soon as Kimberly realized she was alone with Jake Lonestar she screamed in fright and threw up her hands to rake her nails at Jake’s face. Jake was completely caught off guard and her nails scratched deeply into his unprotected face.
“Stay away from me, you crazy freak!” Kimberly shrieked before running past Jake and towards the school.
“Ow…it hurts…” Jake sunk to his knees and covered his face in pain. The deep scratches began to bleed. Blood soon traveled down his face in rivulets. Blood…Jake saw red drops of blood on the ground…his blood…
Jake began to tremble in fear.
Why…why had she attacked him? He had just been trying to help her…and this was how she had repaid him.
Crazy freak…crazy freak…crazy freak…
Her cruel words echoed painfully through his mind. Jake let out a howl of despair as he began to cry.
Jake knew that because of this new incident that his chances of making a friend in high school had been obliterated. He knew that he’d have to spend the rest of his high school days alone and friendless.
And Jake was right. After what happened with the baseball club even more horrible rumors began to spread throughout the school about Jake and he was treated even worse than before.
Jake tried to seek solace at home but his family continued to shun him. At first, when Jake returned from the mental institution they had tried to act ‘normal’ but the Jake that had returned to the Lonestar Ranch was not normal.
When Jake’s father, James, had assigned chores for Jake to do around the ranch chaos ensued. Jake had tried to mend a fence and had ended up accidentally breaking it to pieces because of his uncontrollable superhuman strength.
His parents thought that Jake had destroyed the fence in a display of teenaged rebellion. They didn’t believe him when he said that his unusual strength had caused it.
They also thought he was a liar now.
Feeling depressed about how his parents were treating him like some kind of criminal, Jake had gone up to his room to watch some porn. Jake had carefully used a pencil to turn the TV on and was enjoying himself when the video reached its climax.
Jake sighed as he watched the guy on screen let out a grunt of male satisfaction as he poured himself into the hot babe that was whimpering beneath him. “That’s good for you buddy…but what about me?” Jake muttered to himself. He wondered if he’d ever get a girlfriend and have sex for real.
He had been so lost in his pessimistic thoughts that he absentmindedly touched the TV to turn it off and it began to transform. In seconds, a six-foot-tall alien robot was standin
g in his room. The robot’s head was the TV screen. Upon the screen red glowing eyes appeared and then the robot began to rampage around Jake’s room, destroying everything in its path.
When Jake tried to stop the robot things only got worse. He ended up accidentally touching other electronic devices that had been carelessly placed about his room, and ended up turning them into tiny vicious robots.
Ultimately, Jake had been forced to use his superhuman strength to bash and smash and destroy the alien robots before his parents came home.
When his mother Jessie saw what Jake had done to his room - she wept.
Jessie thought that Jake had done it on purpose or rather…in a fit of madness or rage.
Feeling desperate, Jake tried to explain to his parents and sister what had actually happened but they had looked at Jake like he was crazy….
A part of his parents must have believed Jake though because henceforth he was forbidden from coming anywhere near an electronic appliance.
Jake’s TV, DVD player, iPhone and iPod were not replaced. For entertainment his parents bought him books and board games. Jake thought the board games were an ironic choice because they were something one couldn’t play alone…and Jake was always alone now…
Jake’s collection of porn DVDs were useless now since Jake couldn’t watch them. What a waste. Jake shook his head as he looked at his precious collection. He even had a copy of the infamous ‘sex tape’ that featured Galaxy Girl having sex with her manager when she had been only 15-years-old. Galaxy Girl was the same age as Jake but when the sex tape had ended up on the Internet it had created a huge scandal due to her manager’s age and her being underage at the time.
The scandal and the sex tape had gone viral over the Internet until almost no one hadn’t heard of ‘Galaxy Girl’. The scandal had helped to launch Galaxy Girl’s career and now she was the number one most popular singer in America. Jake would really miss getting to watch that particular video. He pouted at the thought.
But at least Jake still had the naked photos of Galaxy Girl that appeared in Playboy magazine. That was some consolation, at least. His Playboy magazines would have to do for his jerking off material for now.
Everyday after school since Jake’s parents had determined that he could no longer help out with chores they simply ignored Jake when he got home, leaving Jake no choice but to just go up to his room - a room without TV, and with nothing but board games and books. His parents had even been cruel enough to get rid of Jake’s Playstation. That had been a blow!
At least Jake had a nice comic book collection, which he would read and reread over and over again. His comic book collection featured titles like: Spiderman, Superman, and Batman. Jake looked up to those manly heroes. With Jake’s short attention span he could handle comics a hell of a lot better than a classic book like The Scarlet Letter. What had his mother Jessie been thinking?
Jake could reread Batman so many times though before he’d finally get bored, and so with nothing else to do he’d masturbate while looking at nude photos of Galaxy Girl. It was one of the few things that put Jake in a very good mood.
Yea, so Jake Lonestar was a bit of a perv and had a huge collection of naughty magazines for masturbation purposes. But seriously what 17-year-old boy didn’t have a least one dirty magazine hidden under his bed?
If he wasn’t in his room jerking off, Jake would be outside in the cornfields…laying on his back and watching the clouds drift lazily by and picking out the round clouds that looked like breasts and laughing.
Cowboy Samurai X Badass Android Page 1