by Wendy Vella
He means nothing to you any longer.
“And there is the tempting, mouthy vixen I left behind,” he said. “I was worried that she had vanished under the weight of responsibility you now shoulder, Olivia.”
What did he know of her responsibilities?
“None of us can stay as we were, my lord, and it would be unrealistic and childish to suggest otherwise.” Livvy tried to shuffle backwards as he moved closer. Damn, her words had sounded panicked and he knew it, the rogue. The smile still flirted around his mouth. “I would also ask that you not address me so familiarly and now call me Miss Langley, as we can no longer lay claim to being friends.”
That stopped him; he stood just an arm’s length from her, staring intently, his head tilted slightly to the side, as if trying to read her thoughts.
“We will always be friends, Olivia, and you will always be Livvy to me, even if I am no longer Will to you.”
“Friends do not abandon friends,” Olivia whispered, and then could have cut out her tongue. She hadn’t spoken without thought in years, in fact since this man had left England, and now she had told him how much his departure had affected her. “Not that I cared. It was just impolite of you,” she added, cringing inside at how silly her words sounded.
He closed the distance between them until his chest blocked her view of the forest.
“I’m sorry that I was not here for you when your parents passed away, Olivia, and I will say again that I’m sorry if my departure hurt you, but at the time I believed the only option open for me was to go. I was angry and confused, and did not think much about the impact my departure would have on those I left behind.”
“You did not hurt me, my lord. I was seventeen and, therefore, quite happy to move on to the next source of amusement.”
Livvy stepped backwards but her escape was thwarted by two large hands cupping her elbows.
“Yet your demeanor would suggest you are angry with me; therefore, I must have hurt you in some way.”
“I have no wish to discuss this any further.”
He was silent for a while, and Livvy could feel his eyes on her face while hers looked over his shoulder.
“I missed you, you know. Missed the way your hand would fit inside mine as we walked through sun-warmed meadows on a clear day. We would seek out the largest tree and lie beneath it and you would sing to me.”
Livvy closed her eyes as one hand cupped her cheek. She willed herself to stay rigid and shut out the memories his words were forming in her head.
“I used to hear the sound of your laughter some nights while I struggled with the need to come home. I could see your face and the way your eyes lit from within when you smiled at me.”
She stiffened as his fingers trailed over her mouth.
“I have never seen a more beautiful smile to this day.”
His voice had always mesmerized her, the smooth deep tones like heated honey, but she was no longer the naive girl he had left behind. The pain of his departure had taught her one thing— never trust him again.
“I have no wish to hear any more of your ramblings,” Livvy said, struggling to get away from him; she winced as pain shot through her. “Therefore, I insist you release me.
“But this, Livvy,” he said, his breath brushing her ear as he inhaled deeply. “I have never smelled your scent on another.”
Dear God, she could smell him, too, and it made her knees tremble as the memories swamped her.
“I wonder if you still taste the same.”
“The same as what?” Livvy whispered.
“That kiss we shared.” He pulled her closer. “Your first kiss, if I remember correctly.”
“H—how conceited of you to suggest it was my first kiss, my lord, or that I would remember it.” Livvy placed a hand on his chest and tried to push him backwards. He, however, simply placed his larger one on top. Around them the woods suddenly seemed quiet, and she could hear the soft rasp of her breathing as he lowered his head.
“You remember,” he whispered. “Just as I do.” And then he was kissing her.
She had relived that kiss a thousand times, but memories, she realized, fell short from reality. His hand moved up to cup her chin; the other held her waist as he drank from her lips, a slow, sensual onslaught that made Livvy’s body heat all over in seconds. Slumping forward, she landed on the hard wall of his chest as he pulled her closer.
“I have missed you, sweet Livvy Langley.”
All rational thought fled with the first taste of his mouth and Livvy would have stayed here in his arms surrounded by nature had his fingers not brushed the knife wound on her shoulder and jolted some sense into her.
“Ouch!”
“Olivia, are you all right?”
She couldn’t look at him. Sanity had returned with the searing pain and she was mortified that she had behaved in such a wanton manner, especially with him, of all men.
“Olivia?”
“No!” she said sharply as he reached for her again. “Just stay away from me in the future, Lord Ryder. There will be no more sun-warmed meadows. Those days are gone forever, and I would thank you to remember that.” Picking up her skirts, she turned and ran from him as fast as her shoulder would let her. Reaching the gate at the bottom of her garden, she hurried through. Turning, she saw him behind her. He lifted a hand in farewell, which she ignored; walking up to the house, she did not look back even though she wanted to.
Chapter Four
Will made his way home, deep in thought. There was no refuting the fact that, like he, Olivia Langley had changed. Losing her parents had obviously thrust her into the role of looking after her sisters. She had made it more than clear that she wanted nothing further to do with him and he couldn’t blame her for that. Yet Will realized that he wanted to see her again, and he wanted her forgiveness.
Whistling to Gilbert, he heard the dog’s excited barking as he splashed along the shallow stream towards him. Will waded across to the grassy bank opposite. Walking up the driveway to Rossetter House he knew he needed to talk to someone about the Langley sisters and, more importantly, Olivia, and what had happened to them in the five years since he had been gone. Minutes later, he was striding through the house in search of his sister.
He found Thea in the turret room murdering a piece of music that he thought may be by Mozart, yet was not sure. She had grown so much in his absence, now a young woman. He felt a pang in his heart for the coltish girl he had left behind. Sun filtered through the windows, lighting her raven curls, and he was awed at the beautiful lady she had become. Slipping onto the seat beside her, he placed his fingers over hers.
“Perhaps if you did not draw blood every time you played you would achieve a better result.”
She giggled and then kissed his cheek.
“I’m so glad your home, Will.”
“So am I,” he replied, kissing the top of her head. He was not a man comfortable with emotional gestures; however, perhaps now he was home that, too, would change.
“Now the trick with playing the piano is to caress the keys, not bash them into submission, sister.”
“I hate the piano but Joseph makes me practice. He says I need to be well rounded, not just a simpleton like so many of the other debutantes.”
“Did he now? Well, I believe in this, he could be right. So how about I give you a few lessons to see if we can stop everyone running for cover when you are asked to play?
“Ouch!” He grimaced as she thumped him on the arm. “A well-rounded debutante would never strike a respectable peer.”
“Respectable, you?” she scoffed.
“I’m sorry I left you here alone with Joseph,” Will said, running his fingers over the keys softly.
“Joe is a good brother, Will, and has cared for me as a father would. I know you believe he has no feelings for you, but that is not true. He was so worried when you left, he paced these halls for days, muttering about going after you and then one day he just stopped and never mention
ed your name again.”
“We have always been brothers in name only, Thea. Don’t make more of it than there is,” Will said, wondering why the words hurt so much when spoken aloud.
“I believe you’re wrong, Will, and if you were to apologize to him as you have to me, I think you would be surprised.”
Would he? Or, more importantly, could he apologize to his brother?
“I was so angry with you when you left without a word. I even hated you for a while,” Thea said. “But over time, I realized that you needed to do what you had and that staying here would have destroyed you, Will, and possibly Joe too.”
“I didn’t know how to come back until now,” he said as she studied him, her eyes running over every detail of his face.
“You’re different now, aren’t you, Will?”
He nodded but remained silent. Thea threw her arms around him and hugged him.
“I love you.”
“Love you, too,” he whispered, holding her close. For so long he had hurt deep inside, but now he could feel himself starting to heal.
“I just went to visit mother and father’s graves and met Olivia Langley there.” Will brushed a kiss on her forehead before releasing her.
“Livvy! Oh, how was she? I do not get to see Phoebe and Olivia very much since their parents died. Bella still visits occasionally, but I rarely go there anymore.”
“Why don’t you go there anymore?” Will picked up one of her hands and laid it on his as he began to play. “Feel how lightly I touch the keys, Thea.”
“Because everything changed when their mother died.” Thea looked at him, her eyes solemn. “Viscount Langley lost his arm in the same accident, and Bella hurt her leg and Livvy and Phoebe had to nurse them both and then the Viscount died and suddenly they were all alone.”
Will knew how much he had relied on Olivia and his siblings during his parents’ death; he wondered who had supported her.
“Is Bella’s leg all right now?” he questioned.
“No, she suffers terribly, but they have found a clinic in Scotland and Livvy is hoping to get Bella there to have some treatment one day soon.
He remembered the youngest Langley as being a happy young girl with blond curls and bright green eyes. The thought of her injured and in pain did not sit comfortably with him.
“I don’t think everything is as good as they say it is for the Langley sisters, Will.” Thea frowned down at the keys.
“How so?”
“Livvy never had a season and she said it was because she was in mourning and that she needed to stay here with her sisters. However, Bella said that it was because she wanted to wait until Phoebe had hers and they could come out together.”
“That seems fair.” Will swapped their hands and guided Thea’s up and down the keys.
“Yes, but Livvy is twenty-two, Will. Her hopes of finding a husband are diminishing every year she does not enter society. Of course, Squire Melnock has offered for her, but she will not have him.”
“Squire Melnock!” Will roared, feeling the bite of anger. “He’s old enough to be her grandfather.”
“Olivia is always so evasive with me now,” Thea added, ignoring his outburst. “And once, I called in on her unexpectedly and she was scrubbing the walls in the parlor in an old dress.”
“Why is that unusual?”
Thea looked at him before speaking.
“Viscount Langley was a wealthy man, Will, with several homes and lots of money. They always had new clothes and plenty of servants, and not once did Bella ever mention doing household chores.”
“You say that as if it were a foul word sister.”
“Don’t get moralistic with me, brother, I know how to do chores. Penny and Joseph make me do the gardening twice a week, and I have to go into the kitchens once a week to learn how the household works.”
“Apologies tendered, sister.”
“Accepted, brother.”
They played for a while before Thea spoke again.
“The thing is, Will, the Langleys were always my friends, but they were atrociously spoiled and earned quite the reputation as flirts.
“And now?” he queried.
“And now, they are quiet and dignified. They rarely raise their voices or laugh. Phoebe still has a tongue that could slice a man in two, yet even she rarely wields it anymore.”
“You’re worried about them?” Will ran a finger down her check.
“They are my friends, Will. And I miss them. Livvy and I used to have long talks before Penny came along. She would counsel me on all sorts of things and I could ask her anything, but now…”
“Now?” he prompted.
“Now when she thinks no one is looking at her, she appears so sad and alone and it breaks my heart.”
Will knew what she meant; he had seen the sadness and vulnerability that sat beneath the surface of Olivia Langley today, and he had not liked it either.
“I voiced my concerns with Joseph and Penny and they went to visit with them, but upon their return they said that everything seemed all right. However, they offered their assistance should it be required.”
Will couldn’t imagine Olivia Langley’s pride allowing her to take Joseph up on that offer.
“We shall keep an eye on them, Thea, and if they need any help, I shall step in. Now I’m going to ask you something, and I would rather we kept this conversation to ourselves.”
“I promise,” Thea said solemnly.
“How did Olivia react to me leaving England?”
Will watched her closely so he would know if she was hiding anything from him. Thea had always been open book.
“I went over there the day after you left because I believed she needed to know about your departure from a friend. I asked her to walk outside with me,” Thea said quietly. “I told her that you had gone and that we had no idea where to or when you would return, and do you know what she said, Will?”
“No,” he whispered. “Tell me.”
“She took my hands and looked at me. I could see the tears in her eyes as she said ‘Thank you for telling me, Thea’. She then said she was sure you would return one day soon and that I was not to fret as you would stay safe until then.”
“So she wasn’t too upset then,” Will said, and for some foolish, twisted reason this disappointed him.
He was subjected to a look from his sister that had his toes clenching inside his boots.
“I was never in doubt that you had broken her heart, Will, and the months that followed did nothing to change my opinion.”
“She spoke of me often?” He felt like a fool for asking the question, but knew he must.
“No, she never mentioned your name again in my presence, but Bella said she could sometimes hear her sister crying in her room late at night.”
Will played softly while he thought about his sister’s words. Olivia had loved him and he had probably loved her, yet he had been too caught up in himself to want to act on that love.
“Promise me you will never hurt her again. I fear she can take no more pain in her life.”
“I promise,” he vowed.
They sat in silence for a while, both lost in their own thoughts, until Will became aware of the butler standing in the doorway.
“What is it, Alders?”
“A Mr. Frederick Blake has arrived, my lord, and is asking for you.”
“Well, he made good time,” Will said, regaining his feet and urging his sister to hers. “Come, I want you to meet this man, Thea. He saved my worthless hide and kept me safe numerous times over the past five years.”
“But who is he, Will?”
“A friend, and the man who runs my life,” Will said as they left the room.
They had reached the hallway that led to the stairs when he heard Billy squeal somewhere up ahead, and then the little boy appeared with his harried nursemaid at the rear.
“Hello, Billy. Are you going somewhere?” Thea said, holding out her arms as he stopped before him.
Tilting his head back, the boy studied Will, ignoring Thea’s question. His expression was intent as he looked at his new uncle. Will wondered if it was possible for a child so young to read a person’s character, because it felt exactly like what his nephew was doing, and then, to his surprise, Billy lifted his arms.
“He wants you to pick him up, Will.”
“I might drop him.” He couldn’t take his eyes from the boy.
“You won’t.”
Bending at the waist, Will placed his hands on either side of the soft little body and lifted him high.
“Settle him against your shoulder. He likes that best.”
Doing as his sister instructed, he tucked Billy into his shoulder and felt a small arm wrap around his neck. He heard Thea tell the maid that they would watch the boy for a while and then she put her hand on his back and urged him towards the stairs.
“He is a robust little fellow, Will. He won’t break, I promise you.”
“I’ve never carried a child before.”
She didn’t comment on the husky timber of his voice, instead following him down the stairs.
Three carriages were lined up in the entrance way as they arrived outside. A well-built man in a neat black suit was directing people in a loud, booming voice. Joseph was standing beside the first, looking bemused.
“I believe these are your carriages, William?” the Duke said, looking from his brother to his son who babbled something indiscernible at him.
“Freddy, come over here!” Will bellowed, stopping beside his brother.
“My lord.” Freddy smiled as he took Will’s hand and pumped it several times.
Not overly tall, Fredrick Blake’s personality more than made up for his lack of inches. He had sparkling blue eyes, eyelashes a woman would die for and a smooth, shiny bald head. His mouth was usually curved in a smile and he was the most intelligent, shrewd man Will had ever met besides his brother. He had refused to call Will by his first name, but he classed him as a friend all the same.
“Fredrick Blake, this is my brother the Duke of Rossetter, and my sister, Lady Althea Ryder,” Will said. “Billy, don’t pull my hair,” he added to his nephew who ignored him and continued doing exactly that. “And this is my nephew, who has a long title that is far too weighty for one so young; therefore, he is just known as Billy.”