by Sarah Tork
I pulled out a pair of blue skinny jeans, brand new, size six. I grabbed a medium size black tank top, the straps were wide enough to cover my bra straps.
I needed to look good today. I straightened my hair and pulled it up in high ponytail. I applied mascara, blush and lip gloss, finishing the look.
“Annabelle!” Mom called from the kitchen as I made my way down the stairs. She had super hearing, I swear.
“Yeah!” I called back, sliding into my black converse.
“Darling, what about breakfast?” Mom called from the kitchen. “You need to eat!”
I need to eat! Who would have thought those words would have come out of mom’s mouth.
“I’ve got to go, can you bring me a nutrition bar!” I yelled, hoisting my back pack onto one shoulder.
I heard her slippered feet hustle around the kitchen. She came out in her pink bathrobe and matching slippers with a chocolate drizzled peanut nutrition bar in hand. It was only a hundred calories so it was okay for breakfast. Who would have thought, me, Annabelle Simms, counting calories because she’d actually wanted to.
I really did change from the girl last summer.
“You look lovely sweetheart!” Mom gushed like yesterday when I was wearing the dress, eyeing me from head to toe. “Everything looks really good, the jeans fit perfectly, so does the tank top, not an ounce of fat sticking out.”
“Thanks?” I jerked my head back not sure if she was actually complimenting me. Shaking the thought out of my head, I took the nutrition bar from her and opened the door. “I’m off, see you later.”
“Have a great day darling, and knock those boys dead!” Mom yelled, enthusiastically, doing her version of a fist pump. I was red faced by the time I closed the door behind me.
Knock the boys dead! I burst into laughter. She would have never said that at the beginning of the school year, probably scared she’d hurt my feelings. If only she knew now. But I wasn’t going to tell her I had (sort of) a guy, that would be way too embarrassing. I wasn’t even sure if I had him and I wouldn’t know until he proved himself today.
Today was the day.
It was time for James to show me what he and his word were made of. Because if he decided to keep things the same, then it’s going to be goodbye time.
Which would suck, I had a lot of fun last night, and I wanted more.
*~*~*
Jenna had swim practice early this morning, so I didn’t have to wait for her at the bottom of the stairs. I crossed the front patio, ushering around crowds of excited students. It was Friday and weekends meant one thing, party time!
Boredom and work was what it used to mean for me. Now I felt like I had some living to do. Even if I had a shift at the club tomorrow morning, my nights were still free. And from now on, I was going to use every second to its fullest.
You were only a senior in high school once…..well unless you failed.
I crossed the hallway hoping to find James in a huddle with his bro’s and Donna with her hot girl crew. That pivotal moment would be the deciding factor in our relationship. If he acknowledged me in front of all of them as he did yesterday when it was just him and me, we would continue and I would be the happiest girl in the world. If he ignored me, then we would be finished forever. If he chose option two, I’d have to find a way to stay strong. I didn’t feel like I would break down if he did that. I’d have a cry later, but it would be the last time I’d ever cry over him.
I put myself into this situation, again. Did I even have a right to be devastated if things turned horribly?
There was no sign of James or any other Kings of the hallway. Donna and her hot girl crew were absent as well.
Something’s not right.
My heart pounded as I exchanged some notebooks in my locker and then headed to English. Usually they’d all huddle together a row of lockers away from English, but I didn’t see any of them.
What’s going on? Did they change their morning hang out routine? I entered English, it was half full and I chose a seat in the back next to the window. If James showed up late, he could at least sit beside me.
Ten minutes went by, a few more people showed up, but there was still no James. The final bell rings, Mr. Doors got up from his chair and closed the door.
Mr. Doors stood in front of the chalkboard, rubbing his hands together, scouring the room. He raised an eyebrow. “I hope everyone remembers that today is a half day. Some of you decided not to show up, making it an unofficial long weekend. Even though today is a half day, our class still counts and I will be teaching you something that will be very valuable during next week’s midweek quiz. As for the students that decided to not show up today, you all are welcome to share your notes, but I think if you want it to be fair you shouldn’t and let them worry. Tough luck for them.”
Today’s a half day!
I forgot that today was some sort of school half day thing. I chuckled a little as Mr. Doors began writing on the chalkboard. It wasn’t a break for students. It was a break for teachers.
So today was a half day, that’s great. I didn’t feel like spending all day today at school anyways. As for James, it didn’t look like he was showing up. That explained his absence this morning. I hoped that he and his boys and probably Donna and her hot girl crew weren’t altogether having fun, getting a head start to the weekend.
He obviously remembered it was a half day. But he never said anything yesterday. He wasn’t here, and neither were any of his friends.
Things weren’t looking good. The path our relationship was heading was a dark one, unless there was a reasonable explanation and James just happened to be late for school today.
Here’s hoping.
*~*~*
After my last class I headed to my locker and pulled my phone from my bag. I didn’t know if Jenna even came today, maybe she had left after swim practice. As far as I knew, she forgot today was a half day too.
Annabelle: Did you come to school today?
While I waited for her to respond, I exchanged notebooks and grabbed whatever I needed for this weekend from my locker. When I shut my locker, my phone beeped.
Jenna: Yeah, coming to you now!
I leaned against my locker waiting for her, playing with my phone, checking Facebook. I wasn’t friends with James on Facebook, which was odd, because least of all we should have been friends on Facebook. But I wasn’t going to send a friend request, not now anyways. He should have sent me a friend request last summer, but he didn’t.
Maybe it was a sign.
I wasn’t even worthy enough to be his Facebook friend. Or he just didn’t want me to have access to his Facebook page, tagging and all. If Jenna could find all this dirt on him via Latisha’s Facebook page, God knows what I’d find on his. Picture after picture, his boys tagging him, Donna tagging him.
That kind of made sense and I had a sinking feeling in my stomach, but I quickly disregarded it. I wasn’t allowed to feel pain, not regarding this. I made my bed, now I had sleep in it. If it all turned horrible, than I’d have to overcome it and move on, but this time was going to be the last time. There would be no coming back from this.
“Anna!”
I looked up as Jenna walked towards me. I pushed off my locker and met her halfway. “Did you know today was a half day?” I asked her as we crossed the hallway towards the exit.
“No I forgot completely. I would have stayed home today, screw that.” Jenna said.
“You wanna go to Subway for lunch?” I asked her.
“Actually I texted my mom and told her that today was a half day, she told me to come home for lunch. I’m exhausted from swim practice this morning, I just want to go home, eat something and take a nice long nap.” Jenna explained.
“Are your parents picking you up?” I asked as we walked out the building.
“Yeah, my mom is. Why?” She asked crossing the doorway.
“No reason. I guess I’ll just go to Subway alone.”
“Awe, I’m sorr
y.” Jenna expressed sadly. “You want to come to my house?”
“No, you’re tired. But thanks anyways.” I told her.
“What’s wrong?” She asked, sounding concerned.
“Nothing.” I answered.
“Oh, I almost forgot! How was your talk with Dean yesterday?” Jenna’s eyes brightened.
“Oh, actually I didn’t get a chance to talk to him, he had to leave, something about his coach wanting all the players back to their school for an emergency meeting.” I explained as we went down the stairs.
“Did he say he was going to text you after though?” Jenna asked.
“Yeah.” I answered.
“Well? Did he?” Jenna pushed. She was excited.
I had completely forgot about Dean.
After James dropped me off home last night, he promised to text me. Later, I’d checked my phone for any texts from him and there weren’t any. Dean didn’t send me anything either. So much for his promise to text after too.
All the guys around me were breaking their promises, even though I was with James yesterday. It wasn’t like Dean and I were anything. We were barely friends, nothing official, so I was free to do what I’d wanted. I had no reason to feel guilty.
I was a free woman. I could do what I wanted, when I wanted. I didn’t do anything wrong last night. But would Jenna think so?
Shit! How was I going to explain last night to her?
“What did you do after? Did you go home?” Jenna asked as we stopped next to the curb, waiting for her mother’s blue minivan to show up.
“Yes, I went home.” I answered, which technically was the truth, I did go home after the game. A few hours later, but still, I went home, so it didn’t count as a lie. There was no way I could tell her, she’d kill me or worse stop being my friend because she couldn’t handle my up and down craziness. She already thought I was stupid, I could tell even if she didn’t flat out say it.
Wait a minute this was Jenna, she totally said it, just in her own way.
But could I really keep this ‘big momentous thing’ from her? This was big news in the best friend department, losing your virginity.
I lost mine last night and in the best friend rule book weren’t you supposed to tell your BFF right away?
It’s already been over twelve hours. If I waited any longer it might be worse.
I’d better tell her before her mom showed up.
Face to face.
“Jenna?” I said to her. “I have something to tell you.”
“Ugh oh, I know that face Anna. What happened, something did happen right?” Jenna exclaimed, looking horrified, then something flashed over her eyes and she looked at me in shock. “Don’t tell me you – you did what I hoped you said you were never going to do ever again.”
I gave her my best ‘oops’ look. “I’m sorry.”
She slapped her hand across her forehead and turned away. “God damn it Anna! You let him in again? How? When?”
“In the parking lot.” I told her, sounding pathetic.
“When you went to meet Dean?” Her jaw dropped.
“Yes.” I said meekly.
“How?” She screeched.
I exhaled before answering. “After Dean texted me he had to leave, James started texting me. Well actually his friends bombarded me at the drinking fountain. James told them about our relationship. I think they told him that they talked to me. I told them that I was on my way somewhere, then I started getting all these texts from him in the parking lot. Then as I was texting him back, he found me. He probably heard my phone or saw me from wherever it was he was hanging out.”
“But he kissed Donna in front of everyone. Have you no pride?” Jenna asked, still horrified and looking very dumbfounded.
The fact that I was an idiot wasn’t new. It was old news that kept repeating.
“Actually Donna kissed him, it took him by surprise.” I corrected her.
“Were his lips on hers?” Jenna snapped.
“Yes.” I answered timidly.
“Then he was kissing her!” She snipped, blowing fire. “Anna, I can’t believe you talked to that guy, after the way he treated you.”
“He told me that the reason he couldn’t talk to me at school was because of Donna and her hot girl crew, if the boy’s in their group talk to other girls, Donna and her girls are mean to them. He was trying protecting me.”
Jenna’s eyes widened. “Anna, that’s a load of shit!”
“I believed him.” I practically whispered.
She snorted. “I’m sure you did! What else happened? You guys kissed, fooled around in his car after.”
I looked away. “Something like that.”
“No.” Jenna whispered, hoarsely. “No.”
I gazed back at her. “Things kind of….” I started to explain but she held out her palm for me to stop.
“No.” She whispered again, shaking her head like it wasn’t true. “You didn’t.”
“Surprise,” I told her. “I’m not a….virgin anymore.”
I quickly turned so I wouldn’t have to see her death glare. I felt her hands grip my shoulders tightly. “Oh no you don’t, you look me in the eye, Miss ‘I give douchebag boys everything they want!’.
“Stop!” I snapped. “I really like him. He said yesterday that he was going to be mine.”
“Oh really!” Jenna snorted, unconvinced. “Then where is lover boy? Because I haven’t seen him all day!”
“He didn’t show up to English.” I murmured.
“Well will you look at that, he doesn’t show up to school the day after he gets some from you. Gee, that’s not suspicious at all.” Jenna exclaimed, sounding sarcastic.
“We don’t know why he didn’t show up today. Until I know the truth, I’m not going to judge his actions.” I informed her sternly.
“And if his actions prove dishonest, then what?” Jenna asked, her face bright red now.
“Then I’m done with him, for good. I really mean it.”
She raised an eyebrow, looking bewildered. “I’m not even going to respond to that. All I can say is I kind of knew you wouldn’t just let him go, not if he decided to dip back into your life professing his next lie to get you where he wants you.”
“Why wouldn’t he want to be with me?” I held out my arms, palms facing out.
Her eyes narrowed on me. “What are you talking about?”
“I look good, I lost the weight. My clothes look good on me. Why would he want Donna over me?” I gulped.
Jenna stood silent for once, she didn’t have an answer. After a few seconds, she answered. “I don’t know.”
“I think I look good, he should want me.” I whimpered.
“A smart person would. But I think it’s clear he’s not!” Jenna snipped.
“Well, innocent until proven guilty.” I told her.
“And how are we going to find out whether he is guilty or not.” Jenna asked, looking past my shoulders. Her mom’s blue minivan pulled to the curb. The passenger side window rolled down and her mom yelled through it. “Hello Anna banana! How are you my sweetie!”
“Hi, I’m okay!” I told her with a huge smile, blinking away the slight wetness around my eyes. I loved Jenna’s mom.
“Do you need a ride sweetheart?” Her mom asked me.
“No I’m okay, I need the exercise.” I told her.
“You don’t need the exercise, you’re perfect.” She laughed, looking at me like I was crazy, but in a nice way.
I laughed back. “Thank you, but I’m okay.”
“Are you sure?” She asked again.
“She’s sure mom!” Jenna answered for me. She turned to her mom. “Mom, I just need a minute to speak with Annabelle, top secret stuff.”
“Oh, okay, got it sweetheart.” Jenna’s mom nodded, understanding right way and rolled the window back up giving us privacy.
“Well?” Jenna pushed. “What’s the plan, how are we going to catch the liar and get you to leave him for good th
is time!”
“He’s not a liar yet.” I corrected her. “I don’t know what I’m going to do.”
“This time it’s personal, we need to get to the bottom of things in the next few days, if not today. I’m serious! I want blood. I want to rip his ass a new one! He needs to feel pain!” Jenna exclaimed seriously.
I stared at her wide eyed, shocked. “I’m going to try and contact him, if he doesn’t answer me with an explanation, I’ll call you.”
Jenna opened the sliding van door and turned to me. “You better, or else you’re shark bait!” She waved me goodbye and slammed the door shut. Her mom waved at me and drove off.
I pulled out my phone and dialed his number. I needed to hear his voice so he could confirm the mix up with today. That he was at home, sleeping the day away. The line connected and rang for a few seconds, and then abruptly the answering machine came on.
“Leave me a message and I’ll get back to you soon.” James voice took over the receiver. I hung up, not wanting to leave a message.
I decided to text him.
Annabelle: Hey, where are you?
I waited and waited, but I didn’t get a reply. Disappointed I tucked my phone back inside my bag and walked home with a tiny bit of hope still left in tack, that all of this was just one huge misunderstanding.
I hoped.
God!
CHAPTER 30
I’d been home for a few hours. I didn’t eat any lunch and I’d been on my bed the whole time. A few tears escaped, but I quickly wiped them away. It was too early for those and there wasn’t enough evidence to warrant a cry.
The last cry.
My phone beeped and my heart pounded hard. I hoped that it was James with an explanation.
Please! I prayed reaching for my phone off the side table. My heart sank when I saw that it wasn’t his name, but then it quickly picked back up when I saw that it was Dean.