The Fallen
Amanda K. Dudley-Penn
Acknowledgments
I would like to thank my beautiful daughter Isabella and my oldest daughter and one of the models of this book, Constance Dudley and my handsome son, Joshua. Thank you for standing by me during the writing of this book. Also, I would like to thank my mother, Kaye Hirjak and step-father, Paul Hirjak and my mother in law, R. Bell Penn and my father in law, Lee Roy Penn. I would like to thank my siblings, James Matthews, Josh Matthews, Michael Dudley, Kara Wallace, Amber Dudley and Rosa Dudley. I would like to thank my sister in laws, Carolyne Graves, Roxanna Matthews, Amanda Johnson-Penn and Corie Matthews and my brother in laws, Carl Penn, Harold Fuller and JoeWallace. I want to give my thanks to my adopted brother, Robert Sanders and adopted brother in law, Alvin Craig, my adopted sisters, Sandra Pressley, Chrystal Ambrose, Hopi Craig and Connie Sanchez. I would also like to thank my aunts, Connie Sekulich, Vickie Edwards, Karen Williams, Peggy Martin, Peggy Russell-Englant, Amy Russell and Becky Dudley and my uncles Jason Russell, Anthony Russell, Terry Russell and Gary Dudley and David Dudley. I would also like to thank my cousins, Rebecca Grieshaber, Brian Russell, Lisa Anderson, Traci Coble, Catareena Taber and Buffy Russell, Mariah Bryant and Jesse Bryant and of course, one of the models for this book my beautiful cousin, Lacy Bryant and also, my friends, Charlie Matchett, Anthony Harris, Malik Narves, Anthony Criss, Melanie Morris, Leanna Morris, Sonya Erdman, Ladaysha Cassanova, Mandiey Hill, Mendy Millner, Alexis Millner, Anna Marquez, Robert Harry, Bob Ramirez, Nikki, Cindy and Jason Fryman, Mckenzie Zandi, Alexis McGregor and Ann Harry and also my niece, Tami Fleurle. I would also like to give a special thanks to my little ones teachers, Mrs. King, Mrs. Crow, Mrs. Gorman, Mrs. Terry, Mrs. Lambe and the aides, Mrs. Yaniselli Davis, Lana Ruthart and Larry Dantic. Thank you all so much.
I dedicate this book with so much love and affection to my little sister, Amber Dean Dudley. Thank you for always having faith in me.
Prologue
Demons haven’t always existed. There was a time at the very beginning of the earth where satan, demons and evil had not been born. There was no temptation. There was no sin. There was only purity. There was only God.
It’s hard to believe but the first evil came from one of God‘s own creations. Envy and greed bore the darkness that has cloaked this world when Lucifer the most beautiful of angels attempted to overthrow God. Though none are certain, there are many reasons given as to why Lucifer wanted to take God‘s throne. One is that he was jealous of how much God loved man. In this theory, he saw God’s love for humans as a direct insult. He felt angels deserved the love of God more than mankind. In other words, he believed we were beneath him simply because he was an angel. Another theory is that Lucifer felt he should have been the right hand of God. We know that God was saving that seat for his son. However, the most accepted theory is that he simply thought his beauty made him better than God. Unfortunately, he must have been very convincing. He darkened the hearts of other angels. Sadly, there were a lot of them.
Thankfully, Lucifer did not accomplish his goal and was thrown from heaven. Most texts say that the archangel, Michael was handed that task. The angels who followed Lucifer were then cast from God becoming the fallen…becoming what we know as demons.
I suppose that it surprises some to realize that the demons are actually fallen angels. None are the hideous red skinned, horned beings we see in books. All are beautiful. Since the first sin, they whisper in the ears of men, tempting even best of them. They try to pull them away from God with promises which will be broken and darkness disguised as light. The most famous of these cases is the case of Adam and Eve found in Genesis in the Bible. Eve was tempted by the serpent with promises of God-like knowledge. What the serpent told her wasn’t a total lie. The fruit did open her eyes…to sin. From that point forward, man is in a constant battle with temptation.
To make matters worse, every now and then, the demons don’t only whisper. They walk amongst us and they fight against God by using innocents. They possess them, using the bodies of innocent people to do their bidding. When that happens, God’s chosen stand up to fight. Even then the temptation can be too much. Even the purest of God’s chosen can try to resist but even these sometimes fall.
-Excerpts from the paper The Fall by Brady Forrester
Chapter One
Within the Darkness
“Alexandra,” my name echoed around me as if it was bouncing off the walls of a tunnel. I frowned as I blinked open my blue eyes. The hair on my arms and the nape of my neck lifted sending a shiver down my spine. I swallowed as I tried not to panic.
I glanced around finding that I was in darkness so complete that no light could penetrate it. The thickness of it, caused my breaths to be forced through my lungs in painful, suffocating gasps.
My name came again and the voice which spoke it caused my heart to pick up speed. Even though I still couldn’t see anything, I swung my head around, hoping to find some evidence of who was speaking to me and whether they were good or evil.
I forced my breath to slow as I blinked again, hoping to see a shadow or an outline. I reminded myself that even if there was a reason to be afraid, I could not panic. I could not show fear. Slowly, I moved my hand, testing the reality I was in. I sighed in relief when I realized I could move, because the action proved that I wasn’t standing within a vision. If it had been one of the dreams of the future plaguing me, I wouldn’t have been able to move. Unfortunately, when I was having a vision, I was a slave to my future self’s actions.
“Alex,” A male’s voice whispered to me but this time, he used the nickname only people close to me used and suddenly, it didn’t matter that this wasn’t a vision. I realized that I could still be in terrible danger. The one speaking to me could be a demon who had decided to visit me. After all, a dream is how the demons, Asmodis and then, Jezebel had visited me before.
“Who are you?” I asked, narrowing my eyes in the darkness. Still, there was nothing to be seen. Instead, I was forced to use my four other senses.
I tilted my head, listening intently for any clue. His calm, steady breaths were the only sounds in the complete blackness of the area around me. I swallowed again realizing how close he actually was. I could probably reach out and touch him.
“Can’t you guess?” He asked in a voice as smooth as velvet. Still, it sent another shiver down my spine. I had to fight to keep from grasping my hands in front of me. Instead, I forced them to stay casually at my side.
“A demon?” I asked forcing my voice to sound dry and bored even though my stomach was twisting painfully in fear.
He gave a laugh and I raised my eyebrows at the sarcasm in his voice, “You’d like to think that, wouldn’t you?”
I frowned, trying to keep perfectly still even though I knew he was close. I could not let him unnerve me, “What’s that supposed to mean?” I asked when I was sure my voice wouldn‘t betray my fear.
He laughed again but this time his amusement was clear, “It means I’m not a demon,” he said. His voice was light and casual as he continued, “However, I’m not an angel either…at least not anymore.”
I could sense him as he moved closer to me and I stiffened forcing myself not to move…not show weakness. I closed my eyes as every muscle in my body tightened ready for him to attack. Instead, he reached out and touched my jaw with the tip of his too warm finger. Somehow, I kept the gasp that rose to my lips from escaping and I was able to keep from flinching away. Instead, I turned toward the tip of his finger, knowing I was facing him. For a moment, it seemed that I shocked him with the movement because his finger paused bu
t then, he continued his caress of my jaw as if he had never stopped.
“The only ones who used to be angels and aren’t anymore are demons,” I said, picking up the conversation, as his fingtip traced my cheek. Finally, his hand moved away but I still sensed that he was standing too close.
A moment later, his hot breath touched my ear and fanned out across my cheek as he whispered deviously, “Not the only ones.”
My eyes widened as my mind delivered his name. I almost shook my head in denial but the answer I had given myself was the only one that made sense, “Lucifer,” I breathed.
He laughed as he caressed my face again, running his fingers down my cheek, “Smart,” he said, amused once again, “Pretty too. It’s almost a pity that my bretheren will tear you to pieces…Almost.”
I narrowed my eyes as anger swamped me,“You think that,” I said, raising my chin, defiantly, “We’ve already won twice.”
“But not again,” he said and then, caressed my face once more. I wanted to slap his hand away but it would only prove that he was getting to me. I pressed my lips tightly together as he kept talking in that smooth voice that grated my nerves, “But I’m actually looking forward to it. I wonder what your face looks like twisted in torture, Alex. I wonder what your screams will sound like. I bet it’s beautiful almost erotic.”
I couldn’t prevent the tremor that shook down my spine then. It would have taken a saint not to be repulsed at the thought of entertaining him in such a way and I was no saint. Instead, I focused on the one thing I had learned in my studies about Lucifer, “You can’t leave hell yet,” I said, voicing that one comfort but my voice shook, “It’s not your time.”
He laughed enjoying my unrest, “Oh but I can see what is happening. My bretheren will show me every single scene. I will watch every single tear fall down your face and relish every scream.”
“No,” I whispered. Then, I closed my eyes realizing I had to leave the dream. I frowned as I tried to force myself awake. I couldn’t stop trembling and it only became worse as I forced my mind with more and more strength. I could no longer keep from showing my fear and that was more dangerous than anything.
“Yes, Alex,” he said, touching my arm again and causing me to lose my focus. Frustrated, I pulled my arm away from him and tried unsuccessfully to block his voice from my mind. Still, he continued and I wanted to scream, “But first, every person you hold dear will die and you will see every single drop of blood fall. You will hear every scream.”
“You won’t touch them. You won‘t get near them,” I said, determined as I pushed my mind harder. Pain slammed through me as I began to force my mind through the boundaries of the dream. I could sense that I was about to break through but he laughed again and my efforts fell away.
“You’re trying to leave this dream but it’s harder than the others, isn’t it?” He asked, mocking me. Anger slammed through me as I realized he was trying to keep me there longer because I was his entertainment. He scoffed as he continued, “How can you defeat me when you can’t leave a simple dream, Alex? How can you defeat me when you‘re already afraid?”
My nostrils flared as my heart thundered in my ears. Sweat broke out over my brow as I pushed harder, ignoring him as he grabbed me. I swallowed back bile as his hands touched my waist rising further up my ribs almost touching my breast. It was too intimate and a new fear slammed through me. That fear and the fact that I didn’t want him touching me is what finally pushed me out of the dream. My body rose up breaking though what seemed to be rock and molten lava. Hot wind brushed my skin. Then, there was a cool, wetness as soil touched me. Finally, there was light. I crashed through the dream into reality, sitting up in my bed with a start.
Sweat poured down my face causing my long blonde hair to stick to my skin as I trembled over and over again, crossing my arms tightly in front of me. Minutes passed as I continued to hug my arms across my chest. I was rubbing my hands up and down my arms as I tried to calm. Finally, the tremors ended. I closed my eyes and took breath. I looked around my bedroom finding comfort in the familiar surroundings. I swallowed trying to relieve the sudden dryness in my throat. I frowned as I tasted something thick and metallic. My eyes widened as I raised my still shaking hand to my face, touching the wetness just beneath my nose. I pulled my hand away and held it in front of my face. A thick coat of blood blanketed the tips of my fingers. I had received nosebleeds before during visions but this one frightened me more than those had. This one seemed like another form of Lucifer’s attack. Tears burned my eyes as my heart slammed in my chest. If that was true, he could hurt me without ever leaving hell.
I closed my eyes and then, forced them open afraid the dream would return. I could not handle that again. Still, with my eyes open another reality stared straight back at me. If I wasn’t able to stop Lucifer, he would send his demons to torture and kill every single person I loved and I would be left for the very end because he believed me to be solely responsible for the deaths of Asmodis and Jezebel. I raised my chin determined that my loved ones would be safe and I would not perish in the process.
**********
I took a deep, relieving breath as I opened the door to the deck which overlooked our backyard. When I was stressed out I always came there to calm down. This was no exception.
I stepped to the railing and looked into the darkness. The cool breeze swept by me soaking into my skin, instantly drying the sweat which had drenched me only moments before. I allowed myself to smile and then, inhaled and exhaled in a soothing rush. It took longer than usual but slowly, I began to relax.
I had closed my eyes and leaned my head back, continuing to calm. I was so engrossed I did not realize that I wasn’t alone.
“Rough night?” I heard the familiar deep voice of Semarias behind me, causing me to jump. I turned finding an angel with his wings stretched behind him as if he had just been in flight. The snow white of the feathers were in direct contrast to his black hair and tanned skin. His bright, vivid green eyes were kind as they swept over me assessing everything about my appearance in one sweep of his eyes. As always, I was in awe of being in the presence of an angel. I didn’t think I would ever get used to it.
He rose his brows as minutes passed in silence. I blushed as I realized that I didn’t answer his question. I blinked shifting beneath his gaze, “How did you know that I had a rough night?” I asked, stupidly. I mean he was my guardian angel. Of course, he knew. He knew almost everything about me.
Still, I saw guilt resting in the features of his face. He obviously didn‘t like that I knew I was never alone. He was always there. Most of the time, I tried not to think about it too much but when I did, it was overwhelming. It was crazy to realize that privacy was just something that we all tricked ourselves into believing we had.
I blinked returning my thoughts to the question. He shrugged after a moment, “I saw you tossing and turning while you slept but I was told to leave you alone.”
I nodded. It should have made me angry that he hadn’t woke me but instead, I realized that the dream was meant to happen especially if Semarias had received word to let it play out. I shook my head before meeting his eyes again and at least admitted, “I can’t say that I don’t wish you had went against that order but I do understand why you did.”
A shadow of concern dropped across his eyes as his gaze swept over me again, finally, stopping at my eyes, “What happened?” He asked, as he stepped closer to me.
I tilted my head as I studied his face, trying to understand what angels were able to do and not do. Obviously, he had not entered the dream. Still, that didn‘t mean that he couldn‘t, “You don’t know?”
His eyes widened in understanding and he shrugged his muscled shoulders, “I have the ability to visit your dreams, but I wasn‘t allowed to tonight. I would have been punished if I had gone against the orders,” he said, pressing his lips together, “I didn’t like it but I had to obey.”
I nodded but kept my eyes firmly on him, awaiting
his reactions to my next words, “Well, you asked if I had a rough night,” I said, shifting beneath his gaze, “Well, I guess that depends. Does a visit from Lucifer count as rough?” I asked as Semarias’ face hardened as I spoke the name of Satan. His face reddened in more anger than I had ever seen him possess. I blinked as he took a few deep breaths.
“Yes, that counts as rough. However, I knew it would eventually happen,” he whispered with his eyes flashing dangerously. The rest of what he spoke was said through clenced teeth, “I just wasn’t sure when.”
“Some warning would have been nice,” I said, hearing the lack of sleep in my voice. I glanced up at him and immediately felt sorry for uttering the words. I had pretty much told him that he had failed me. The fact that angels, especially guardian angels, weren’t meant to fail, reflected in the horrified expression on his face. I was mentally chastising myself as I continued, “But I guess you were hoping you were wrong.”
“Yes,” he said as relief washed over his features. Still, he frowned in concern as he asked, “Are you okay?”
I nodded but I realized he was skeptical so I decided to tell him the truth, “I’m frightened but I think that‘s to be expected,” I said, raising my chin as I looked into his eyes. He was probably the only one I would admit that too. It wasn’t like I could hide it from him anyway. He would know if I was lying especially since he had seen my reactions to the dream.
He studied my face carefully and then, gave me a sad smile, “That’s understandable,” he said nodding his head, stiffly. He pursed his lips as he stared at me in silence. It was easy to tell that he was contemplating a question in his head. Finally, he nodded making a decision. His voice was low but sympathetic as he asked, “Are you still going up against him?”
I gave a bitter laugh, “I really don’t have a choice, do I?” I asked, throwing my hands up, “He’s sending his demons after me but he’s doing it in a way to heighten my torture. He’s going to hurt my family and friends first. He threatened them. I can‘t let him do that.”
The Fallen (The Alexandra Denton Chronicles) Page 1