I look up at him, closing the papers so he can’t see where I was looking.
Yes, I think. Yes, I particularly would like someone who looks like a golden Adonis. Like a fallen angel with evil purposes and a cold heart. Like…
“Did you see the twins already? You seem like the type that would go for quantity over quality,” he says, smirking.
My face flames and I open my mouth in offended shock, but he closes the distance between us and puts a long fingertip to my lips.
“Shhh…” he says, face serious. “I didn’t mean it like that.” He sweeps his eyes over my body. “I like your curves. I told you men of our kind like that. I wouldn’t lie.”
I frown at him. Aroused and a little offended by him being this close, this dominant.
“Well,” he says with a small smile. “I wouldn’t lie about that.”
“Why not?”
“Because it would be too obvious. You’ll see just how my kind, our kind, feels about your body in just a few days.”
“Or maybe,” I say bitterly, trying to ignore the fact that his tight thighs are touching me as he sits on the side of my bed. “Maybe they’ll be like you, and say I’m nothing to look at and below their standards.”
He puts a hand up to his forehead. “Look, Misty. My dad has tried some pretty stupid things in his fervor to set me up. My brothers…they’re settled and happy, and he’s got nothing else to do with his time. I didn’t even see you. I was just prepping to be an asshole so that I could get out of the whole thing. I’m sorry you got caught in the crossfire.”
I frown. “If he wants to set you up, why don’t you let him?”
He looks away, sitting a little straighter and staring out the window by my bed, out into the cold, dark night. “It’s a long story.”
“I’m not that busy.”
His eyes are cold when he glances back at me. He was playful with me for a minute. Well, open to me for a minute. But now he’s back to his old self. “It’s not a story for you.”
“Oh,” I say, not letting myself be hurt for it. He didn’t ask for me to enter his world, making myself his problem and leading his dad to put him into service as my unofficial bodyguard. “Do you resent me?”
He looks taken aback by that, and his eyes are softer as he turns to me. I can tell this cold angel could be kind at times, if he wanted to. “Why do you think that?”
“Well, it’s going to be a pain, going to that mansion.”
“That mansion is where I’ve been living for years,” he says with a smile. “I own it. Well, me and my brothers. It’s a great place for a wolf. Once you learn to shift, you’ll have a good time there.”
“Ah. At least until I find a mate…”
“Yes.”
“Or unless someone ravishes me,” I say.
He snorts and shakes his head. “No one is going to ravish you, Misty.”
“Yeah well…”
His golden eyes close for a moment, like he’s thinking, and then open. “You don’t believe me?”
“Well, you aren’t exactly the biggest…I mean, your dad is much wider and taller. And I don’t know, don’t you think maybe he’s overestimating you because you’re his son?”
Lindon laughs at that, a clear, deep sound that resonates through the room, waking it up as if he can make the whole house come alive. “He’s not overestimating me. But if you want me to look into someone else as your protector, I can talk to him.”
“I just, I mean, so far you’ve been kind of a bully.”
“Well,” he says, putting a hand in my hair and ruffling it until I swat his hand away. “I’m the only one allowed to bully you, I won’t let anyone else do it.”
“Hmph,” I say. “I still don’t see why anyone thinks they’ll be attracted. Just because they’re wolves, doesn’t mean they are blind.”
He had gone back to staring out the window, but he turns sharply at that, studying me with hard eyes. “Blind?”
“You know, to what I look like.” I look down at myself. “This.”
He blinks, then bites his lip, then tilts his head. The effect is sexy and makes me want to grab him by his collar and pull him forward to kiss that confusion straight off his beautiful face. “Misty, in the human world, were people cruel to you?”
I shrug. “It doesn’t matter.”
“I promise. You’re desirable. I screwed up with what I said when you got here. But that was on me, not on you. Please believe me.”
“Sure,” I say.
“What would I have to do to make you believe me?” he folds his arms and I gulp, mouth going dry at the sight of magnificently toned biceps.
“I don’t know.”
“You’re desirable,” he says. “Any of the males will be lucky to mate you.”
He goes back to staring out the window, like there’s someone or something out there.
“Then what about you?” I ask, hating myself for saying something that feels so vulnerable. “If I’m this valuable, rare commodity, and everyone will want to mate me, then why not you?”
He lets out a slow breath, brushes soft hair off his face and then turns to me. “I’m not going to take a mate,” he says softly. “It’s got nothing to do with you.”
I swallow. This gorgeous man is just going to stay single forever? “Why?” I ask, aware that he has no obligation to tell me.
He stands and walks to my door, opening it and becoming a silhouette as he blocks the light. “Because I already found one, and she died.”
Then he shuts the door and walks away, leaving me slack-jawed in shock.
Chapter 3
I’m kind of glad they brought another girl over to help me get settled into my new place. Well, the place I’m going to stay while a bunch of alphas fight over me. Nice.
I resolved not to think over what ever depressing story Lindon has in his past, but I find myself breaking the resolve frequently. Maybe it’s just the part of me that loves a good story, that has to fill in the details and see what happened between two people. Or maybe because a part of me wants Lindon to take part in the alpha challenges and thinks if I could find out exactly why he won’t, I could change his mind.
I shake my head, that’s a stupid idea.
I turn to Aspen, a beautiful girl with dark red hair and gray eyes and curves to kill. She flashes a smile at me as we take my bags out of Rowan’s lodge to load them in a car. A black Jaguar sedan is parked outside and one of the most stunning men I’ve ever seen in my life is standing by the car loading them in for us.
“It’s a great day for a move,” she says. “Beautiful, right?”
I look up around me. The air is crisp and bright and there’s a smell of clean mountain foliage. I kind of want to stay here forever. It’s quiet and peaceful. Maybe I can pick one of the men who has a place like this.
“You all set?” The gorgeous male asks. Aspen’s husband, Rafe. Almost as tall as Rowan and nearly his spitting image, but younger as he’s his son.
“I think so,” I respond, not meeting his eyes. He nods, business like, and goes inside to say one last thing to Rowan.
As he goes I watch him and then turn to Aspen with a sigh. “Man, can I just order one of those?”
Her smile quirks up at the side, then she laughs. “Rafe is…one of a kind, that’s for sure.” She opens the door so I can sit in the passenger seat, and I shake my head.
“You should sit up front with your husband. Is Lindon driving over with us?”
“No, I think he’s still working things out with Rowan. We’ll go get you settled in and then the guys will start arriving.”
“But Lindon first?” I blurt out, hating that I’ve been listening so much about how I’ll need him that I’m starting to believe it.
Aspen’s smile becomes knowing and those gray eyes flash as she looks me over. “Perfect.”
“Excuse me, what’s perfect?”
She shakes her head, sending shimmering red hair waving around her head before using one han
d to swipe it away and over her shoulder. “Nothing, and yes, Lindon should be there before anyone else. But I’m coming. I’m planning to stay with you at least for part of it. And it won’t be so bad. You know, I had to choose between Rafe and his brothers while staying in the same mansion.”
A low growl sounds. “You’re not staying there,” Rafe says, storming down the front walk and looking even more intimidating than usual. “No way I’m letting you stay in a house with a bunch of unmated males without me.”
“Who said anything about staying without you?” she asks.
“I have pack business. Rowan is wanting me to take over soon. You know that.”
“You can give up a few days,” she says. “And if not, Lindon can protect us.”
Rafe purses his lips, and I can tell he’s gritting his teeth, but then he nods. “I guess if it had to come to that, yes, he could. I trust Lindon.”
“Everyone does,” I mutter, getting into the backseat as they both get in the luxurious car on either side.
The interior is smooth, buttery leather and I relax back into it, glad to have the whole back seat to myself. Aspen and Rafe talk to themselves, and I’m glad they aren’t talking to me because my brain is just in a constant state of fatigue lately. I thought I was an orphan, I thought the only people who valued me were dead. I thought I was okay with that.
Then Rowan had to turn that all upside down and tell me I was valued, and I guess I should just appreciate that at this point in my rather empty life. But at the same time, I was comfortable before. I had settled in for the long haul, given up on anything more.
I don’t know if I can really allow myself to hope for more, even though the beautiful people all around me keep telling me that it’s all coming to me soon, on a plate.
I guess what’s happening to me is just like what happens in my books, but I always knew that those situations weren’t real. So part of me is waiting for someone to jump out from behind a camera and say that I’ve been pranked and everyone’s watching it on TV even though I never signed a consent form.
I rest my head against the seat and tune everything out for most of the drive. When we get off the freeway, Rafe turns back to us and says we’re almost there.
“Hey guys,” I ask, knowing that asking this might get me a bad reaction, but too curious to pass it up. “What’s up with Lindon?”
Rafe laughs, a deep, low sound. His voice is much growlier than Lindon’s, which is low but smooth and elegant. Seductive. “What isn’t up with Lindon?”
“I don’t get it,” I say impatiently.
“Just, he’s a complex person,” Rafe says. “I guess if anyone can help you understand Lindon, it might be Aspen. They were close. Still are, in a different way.”
Aspen fidgets, tosses a look at me over her shoulders and then starts nervously putting a braid in one side of her hair. “I’m not sure. I think there’s a lot more below the surface than I think anyone knows with him. He doesn’t let anyone in.”
“He had a mate that died, though?”
Rafe and Aspen go dead silent and the car jerks slightly like Rafe accidentally tapped the break. Then an audible exhale and things go back to normal.
“No,” Aspen says. “I don’t know what you could mean by that. Lindon has never had a mate.”
“That we know of, and it’d be hard to miss. Our scents change when we have a mate,” Rafe says.
“Unless…” Aspen trails off, staring out the window like she’s not sure she should say anything about what has just occurred to her. I lean forward, eager to hear more.
“Unless what?” Rafe says. “There hasn’t been a single candidate. I have no idea how he could have had one.”
“I don’t know,” she says. “And this has to stay between us, because I don’t know if Lindon even meant to kind of suggest this, but when we were back at the mansion, you know, when you guys were competing, when we were out on the picnic…”
Rafe growls. “Ugh, get to the point. I don’t want to think about that picnic…”
“Anyway, when we there, I got the opinion that maybe…maybe he’d had feelings for Ava. I mean, I knew they were close growing up…but I was young when she died.” She turns toward me. “I’m a little younger than the guys. Ava was an alpha female we brought over from another pack to hopefully mate with one of the potential alphas. As Rowan has probably told you, our race has to be careful as we are getting more scarce.”
“Right,” I say. “That’s why I’m here, putting up with this.”
“Oh, really?” Rafe says. “I was under the impression it was the hot dudes that won you over. Ouch.” Aspen whacks him on the shoulder. “Anyway…”
“Right,” Aspen continues, facing Rafe. “Well, I got the feeling that Lindon resented you for being intended for Ava, and that he resented you being the lead alpha because of that.”
“But Ava died…Oh.”
“Right.”
“But they were kids, they couldn’t have…”
Aspen shrugs. “Maybe you should ask Lindon about it. Maybe that’s what he means, maybe not. Who knows. It just came to mind as a possibility.”
I rest my chin on my fist. I’m not offended at Rafe’s words about being selfish and coming for the men. I am selfish. I’ve had to be. I’m the only one looking out for me, if I don’t, who will? I can’t trust anyone else to take care of me, and it doesn’t make me bitter. So I just have to ignore people who seem to take issue with my form of independence.
“I’m not going to figure it out,” Rafe says. “I have enough on my plate with taking over pack alpha duties without trying to get inside Lindon’s head on a subject he obviously doesn’t want to talk about it. Since he hasn’t ever before.”
Aspen turns back to me, twisting in her seatbelt to rest one hand on the headrest of the seat so she can face me for a more prolonged amount of time. “So, how did you know? Why did you ask if he had a mate who died?”
I shrug, not wanting to give too much away if Lindon hasn’t talked about it. He didn’t say it was a secret, so I didn’t know not to bring it up. But by their own admittance he doesn’t want it known. “Just something he alluded to. It wasn’t that clear. Perhaps I misinterpreted things,” I say.
“I like you,” Aspen says.
“You seem like a very straightforward person,” Rafe says. Aspen nudges him again, as if she thinks what he just said was harsh, but I just shrug my shoulders.
“I guess I try to be. I’m not always the nicest, but you’ll usually know exactly how I feel about you.”
“How do you feel about us?” Aspen says, turning to me with slight shyness in her gray eyes.
“You and Rafe? I don’t really know you two that well yet.” I nod to Rafe. “I’d love to order one of those to go for my alpha challenge, and I think you seem like you’d make a good friend, but beyond that…”
Rafe’s laugh booms in the car and Aspen ‘hmphs’. “Don’t inflate his ego, it’s already huge.”
“Only because I’ve got you,” he says, putting a hand out to tenderly rest on her knee. “How could I not be conceited, knowing that I made you mine?”
Aspen ‘tsks’ and tries to stay stern, but breaks into a smile that seems to glow and shares a quick glance with him before they turn back to the road.
I want that, something inside me says. Something that gave up on it a long time ago, when the other girls were asked to homecoming and I wasn’t, when everyone else had a boyfriend. Slowly the years went by, and I wanted to find someone especially before my parents died, so I wouldn’t be totally alone.
But that didn’t happen. Dreams don’t come true. There’s no point hoping for something you can’t have.
But Rafe and Aspen definitely make it look wonderful. I think of my foster parents’ last years. It was the same kind of love between them. I’m glad they went together, even if the car accident was completely tragic and unavoidable. I could never imagine one living without the other. I just hope it was fast, that they
weren’t in pain.
I blink back a surprise wave of tears that fill the corners of my eyes.
“You okay back there?” Aspen asks. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I say. “Just dust in my eye.”
It’s a stupid excuse but Aspen seems to accept that I don’t want to talk about it. She seems like a tough girl herself, so she probably understands what it’s like to want to keep things inside.
We pull onto a road that goes up a steep hill. I look out of the car window and my eyes widen. “We aren’t going to that huge place, are we?”
Rafe and Aspen just laugh.
I keep my eyes glued on the building as it comes closer. It rises like a behemoth in front of us. Huge, luxurious, lonely. The kind of house that seems like a dream until a hundred years from now, when people come to film haunted house movies in it. I guess if you are going to live with ten men for any space of time, you’re probably better off in a house where there are plentiful areas you can go to get space away from them all.
We pull up to the house, answering my question.
“Home sweet home, at least for now,” Rafe says. “I’m sure once you pick someone you’ll go somewhere new and equally awesome.”
Aspen frowns. “I don’t know, I hope Rowan prepared you for the fact that most shifter packs aren’t as well off as his pack. I doubt many of the other alphas will have much real wealth.”
Rafe just starts unloading the bags. When he starts up the pristine front walk with huge cases under his arms, Aspen gives him a long, up and down leer, pausing on his ass.
“Of course, there are a lot of benefits to alpha males, aside from the money thing,” she says, turning to share a knowing wink with me.
I can feel my full body blush starting. “I’m guessing so.” I fidget, intimidated by the mansion. Rowan may be annoying, but I kind of wish he was here now, reassuring me.
“What’s wrong?” Aspen asks, picking up on my uncertainty.
“What if Rowan’s wrong? What if none of them want me? Or what if they just want me because of my genes, or my smell? It’s not what I was thinking for my future.”
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