Campbell
Hazel is sleeping in the pack n’ play. Her noisy breathing and tiny grunts help me keep time until Knight returns to our room.
I don’t think I did anything wrong, but he all but ran out of the room. It was probably for the best because when he had me pinned on the bed, all I could think about was kissing him.
Maybe I’m reading too much into our situation.
Maybe, just maybe, he’s a nice guy helping a woman who is down on her luck; instead of a man who thinks if he helps said woman, he might be able to get in her pants.
Or I could get into his pants. Run my hands down the hard planes of his body, kiss his perfect lips, and feel his back as the muscles flex under my palms.
I groan, turning to bury my face in my pillow. “Not now, stupid hormones.”
Flopping onto my back, I force myself to relax, using the breathing techniques I learned in one of my many yoga classes. If only they could see me now, stranded in an airport with a handsome soldier and—
“Not helping.” I close my eyes, going over the moment I arrive at home that I’ve been rehearsing in my head since we left LAX.
In an ideal world, one in which my parents are humans with emotions other than anger and disappointment, I introduce Hazel to them. I show them how perfect she is, let them count her fingers and toes. Marvel over her sweet disposition, and coo over her blonde curls that are really starting to grow now.
They beam at me, love in their eyes as they agree Hazel is the most amazing baby ever to be born. We go inside the formerly cold house that was my home and have dinner like a nice, normal family.
I tell them how happy I am to finally be where I belong. That I’m so sorry it took me so long to find my way back, but now that Hazel and I are there...
Suddenly, my mother jumps up from her chair, rounding the table to hug me while she whispers there’s nothing to apologize for. My father joins in, his big, strong arms the comfort I’ve always needed as a little girl and teenager as he hugs me.
“We’re so happy you’re home,” they say in unison. “The past is done, and we can start over.”
Tears spring to my eyes, real tears, and I scrub them away.
My heart pinches as that beautiful, ideal world fades away.
“If only,” I whisper. After another few minutes of waiting for Knight to return, I finally fall asleep.
LAST NIGHT, WHEN HAZEL woke me up for her near-dawn feeding and I stumbled my way around the room, I found Knight stretched out on the sofa, his large frame making it look tiny. The blanket he’d grabbed from the end of the bed barely covered him, so I dragged the extra comforter from the closet and tucked him in properly.
I even let myself brush back his short, dark hair.
I sigh thickly.
“You okay?” he asks as we finish eating breakfast.
Nodding, I gulp down the last of my apple juice. “A little nervous is all.” My plane leaves in less than thirty minutes, but the gate is right next door and I’m already checked in.
He smiles at me, and my heart flips. It would be so nice to see his smile every morning. “I’m telling you, Cam. As soon as they get a peek of Hazel, it will all be over for them.”
“From your lips to God’s ears.” Only God’s not the one I’m worried about because my mother doesn’t listen to him. Instead, she prays to the god of grudges. There’s no such thing as a prodigal son or daughter reunion for her. If anything, she’d say the parents were too soft and should have let their son continue to live and eat with the swine.
Knight grabs our plates. “Again, you have options.”
“I know.” I watch him walk away, a prelude to what will be happening for good when Hazel and I board the plane.
My throat grows tight.
How can it be so hard to say goodbye to Knight after only knowing him for twenty-four hours? Will I ever see him again?
The answer comes to me, as clear and firm as when I decided to have my baby.
I will see him again.
He will come home safely.
“Ready, Momma?” He flashes one of his grins, taking Hazel from where she’s lying beside me in the wide chair. “She said she wanted to be held. Didn’t you, honey?”
She stares up at him, blue eyes intent. It’s like she can understand every single word he’s saying.
“Consider letting your momma sleep longer than three hours at a time. She’d like that.” He catches my eye and winks.
“Her momma would also like for you to come home safe.”
Knight gives me a killer smile, one so full of confidence that my heart beats faster. “I’ll do my best.”
We make our way to the gate, my footsteps dragging to make this moment last even longer. “I hope we didn’t keep you up too much.”
“Actually, I slept like the dead.” He nods at one of his fellow soldiers. “And I got something for you, for the ride home. You’ll need it.”
Before I can protest, a stroller with a car seat attached to it is wheeled up. “What in the world?”
“We got together and uh, took a little reconnaissance trip to Target last night.”
Tears pool in my eyes. “I can see that.”
“You can use the car seat for up to six months and the stroller a lot longer. That way you won’t have to worry about riding in the Uber for two hours without one.”
I stare up at him in amazement. “I don’t understand.”
“Hazel told me she needed something to sit in, so...” He shrugs. “I couldn’t tell her no.”
Knowing he won’t take it back and I really do need the car seat and stroller, I rise on my toes and kiss his cheek. “Thank you,” I whisper against the dark stubble of his jaw, then I fix my attention on his buddies. “And y’all, too.”
They grin, replying with, “You’re welcome, ma’am.”
There’s a final call for families needing assistant or those with small children.
“I guess that’s us.”
“I guess so.”
Finally, I take Hazel from him. “Thank you... again.”
“No need. I’ve—it was—you... you’re welcome.” He grabs the stroller. “Let me get this checked in for you.”
We walk to the front desk, and in a matter of seconds, everything is taken care of.
“You be safe, okay? Don’t do anything too heroic,” I tease, then bite the side of my lip. I swear my pulse is pounding so hard that everyone can hear it. “Take care, Knight.”
His silver eyes search my face. “Yes, ma’am.”
Unable to take our goodbye a second longer, I force my feet to move, force myself not to look back. It doesn’t get easier as I make my way down the gangplank.
When I finally look at my ticket and realize he’s bought a first-class seat for me, I burst into tears.
Chapter 7
Campbell
I ARRIVE IN EDEN GROVE without much fanfare. The small town where I grew up still looks the same, pretty, historic houses on pretty streets lined with pretty trees. More often than not, Eden Grove is named the prettiest town in North Carolina.
Only behind all that pretty exists some very ugly souls.
Like my parents.
They go to church for show, are long-time members of the country club, and every Friday my mother lunches with the current mayor’s wife while my father golfs with one of the local state senators.
I’m not opposed to networking. I did it myself while I lived out in LA. It’s how I met Hazel’s dad. I wanted to be an actress, try out the drama skills my parents only let me hone during high school, and only under the strict supervision of a dramatic arts teacher who probably wished she never agreed to teach in our town.
Who would when nearly every parent expected their child to be the star of the show?
In any case, I never did become a movie star, but I did find work as a brand ambassador for a couple of fitness and health food lines on Instagram... and a few times as a stand-in for Anna Kendrick while she filmed o
n set at MGM.
That was the high point of my career in La-La Land.
A ghost of a smile curves my lips, but as soon as the Uber driver pulls in the semi-circular driveway, it fades. The house I grew up in holds very few happy memories for me.
My stomach twists and turns in response. I want to tell the driver to keep going, give him the address Knight saved on my phone.
The unknown has to be better than the devil I know lives here.
I take a deep breath.
Things could have changed.
People change all the time, and if I want them to think the best about me, then shouldn’t I do the same for them?
As the driver stops, the door to the house opens and my brother rushes out. There’s a huge smile on his face as he shouts my name so loud I can hear it over the music playing in the car.
“Nice welcome wagon,” the driver says with a grin. “I’ll get your stuff from the trunk.”
“Thanks.”
Caine all but rips open the door. “Where is she?”
“I’m right here. Thanks.”
He steps back, a smirk playing on his lips. “I’ve seen you before, but mini-Campbell...”
I unbuckle Hazel’s car seat and safety strap, then scoot my way out of the SUV. Caine takes the car seat from me, slinging an arm around my shoulders as soon as I stand. I glance up at him in surprise. “You’ve gotten a lot taller.”
“And a lot smarter.” He wriggles his eyebrows. “I’m practically ready to run Dad’s company.”
“Says the twenty-year-old with all the delusional self-confidence in the world,” I quip.
He nods, all serious now. “Gotta start somewhere, and I find that delusions of grandeur really work for me.”
I snicker, then grow sober. “I’m so happy you’re the first person I get to talk to, little brother.”
“Good luck, ma’am,” the Uber driver calls out.
“Thank you. Safe travels,” I reply, waving after him, then turn my attention back to my brother. “Where is everyone?”
“Momma’s at tennis lessons, and Dad’s in a meeting with the mayor.”
“At the club and on the golf course. Got it.”
“They won’t be home until four-thirty, so feel free to make yourself at home, or other plans for the evening, in the next hour or so.” He checks out Hazel, avoiding my curious look. “Hey sweet thing. You look just like your momma. So pretty. Who’s the pretty girl? You’re the pretty girl.”
“She’s not a dog, Caine.”
He gives me a wry smile. “I know that.”
Suddenly, it hits me... there is no way, even with their very scheduled lives, that either of our parents wouldn’t be here to greet me, unless they’ve disowned me... or worse... “Please tell me our parents know Hazel and I are here.”
He cocks his head to one side, reminding me of a puppy that’s up to no good. “They knew you two were coming... I just wasn’t very specific on the day.”
I groan. “Seriously?”
“Better to catch our mother by surprise than to give her time to prepare,” he points out.
“She hates surprises,” I all but growl. “I want them to think I’ve changed.”
“Don’t bother.” He hugs me. “I love you just how you are.”
I roll my eyes and bump him with my hip. “I’m not giving you Emma Stone’s number, no matter how nice you are to me.”
He eyes me, stroking his chin thoughtfully with his free hand. “But you do have it.”
“Nope.” I really don’t, but pretending I do, by denying it, will help me get through the initial reunion with my family.
“What about Anna—”
“I was her stand-in for the love scenes while shooting Every Way Wrong is Right,” I say in all seriousness. Actually, another woman was her stand-in for that movie.
He grimaces. “Thanks for that. Now I’ll have to scrub my brain, my eyes, my search history... So gross,” he mutters. “Thanks for ruining that for me.”
“Anytime,” I say cheerfully, grab my bag and the stroller, then head inside.
GROWING UP, I ALWAYS had this feeling that something about my family was off, that the lack of hugs and kisses—of emotions in general—were not like everyone else’s families. Sure, I lived in a town full of self-important people, but that mostly manifested into love, or at the very least, affection for their children.
For my brother and me, it was like we were required additions to our parents’ lives, almost like we were created to simply make their life even more enviable to their friends. We were trotted out like show ponies, made to perform, and then sent away once we had appropriately dazzled and impressed.
God forbid if we were tired or, I don’t know, a ten-year-old who didn’t want to be treated like a circus animal.
None of that ever mattered to them. By the time I realized how screwed up it was to be treated like that, it was too late. I craved their approval, would have twirled fiery batons while singing Dixie to the governor in order to get it. Instead, I made the greatest mistake of my life by marrying Baylor.
My body still grows cold sometimes when I think of him, of his charming ways and giant hands that loved to twist pleasure and pain into one knot of confusion. The boys I’d kept at a distance, the ones I let pursue me, were nothing compared to the way he treated me, made me feel...
Coming here brings all of those feelings back. While I’m strong enough to face them, I don’t want to have to live like this every day.
Maybe I shouldn’t have come here at all.
Maybe I should have taken Knight up on his offer and gone directly to Castle Beach instead.
Caine opens a random bedroom door, and I look at him in confusion. “This isn’t my room.”
He flushes. “You don’t have a room.”
“She gave my stuff away?”
He gives me an incredulous look. “And expose your obsession with boy bands? I think not.”
He walks in the room, and I follow behind him. It’s decorated in our mother’s signature style of flowers and plaid. I’m not opposed to the color scheme or even her taste. In most cases, the interior design would be considered warm, but with her, it’s fake.
Cold.
A lie.
“At least she didn’t put you in the guesthouse.” He sets Hazel’s carrier on the floor. “Anything I can help you do?”
“You’re leaving, aren’t you?”
“I like this place as much as you do.”
I sigh, knowing my absence made him the sole target of our parents. “Promise you’ll be back by dinner.”
He bites his lip. “I’ll be back tonight.”
“Have things gotten that bad?” I ask, concern overriding my anxiety.
“Only two more years, Cammie, and then I don’t have to play their games.”
“Two years is a long time.”
He flashes me a smile, full of cockiness. “Not when most of it is spent on campus.”
“What about after you’re finished?” I can’t help but ask him. In the time I’ve been gone, I’m more than a little guilty of not thinking about my little brother. I want to make up for that. “You don’t have to come back here.”
“I gave my word.”
“You can break it.” It’s not like there’s a contract in place that my brother signed, promising he’d come home to become one of the sons in the Faircloth and Sons Financial Services. Besides, in a town of less than five thousand, there can’t be that many clients with portfolios big enough to make everyone who works there wealthy.
He shakes his head, hair the color of wheat sliding as his dark brown eyes become sad and firm. “That’s the only decent and true thing about me. If I don’t have that, then I’m nothing but a trust-fund kid who wants to live off money he didn’t earn.”
“They’re not decent or kind, and you’ve proven over and over again that you’re nothing like them.”
“Which makes it even more imperative I keep my word. We are
nothing like them.”
I want to argue, want to make him see we don’t have to keep our word when there are soul-sucking monsters involved. “Fine. But I expect to see you before I turn in for the night.”
“You got it.” He smiles faintly before leaving me standing in the middle of a room that’s not mine, in a house that’s colder than the artic, while I wait for parents who don’t give a damn about me...
And most likely won’t give a damn about their grandchild either.
IT ALMOST TIME FOR dinner when I’m summoned to my mother’s sitting room. After making sure Hazel is sleeping, I grab the baby monitor and head downstairs.
With each step, I steel my shoulders and slowly tip up my chin. I’m determined not to let my fear show.
My mother can smell it, but not only that, I’m pretty sure it’s part of her daily dietary requirements.
Out of habit, I knock on the door and wait for her to reply.
“Come in.”
My heart pinches at her voice, and the small child who still lives inside of me responds to it with a need to be loved. I step inside, marveling at how nothing has changed yet everything looks brand new. Old money we may be, but my parents have never subscribed to pretending not to have money by allowing everything to go to pot, or by buying only well-made, high-end items that last generations.
I spot my mother standing by her chair, perfectly poised and coiffed as she gazes at me with pure disdain. It would be nice to say the ugliness living inside of her has made her twisted and ugly, but it would be a total lie.
She’s perfectly lovely to look at, very fit and blonde. Dainty and petite. She’s always reminded me of a porcelain doll. When I was little, I wanted to look just like her.
“You’re looking... well enough.”
She prefers for us to dress up for dinners, but I don’t own anything remotely nice enough to meet her standards. Jeans, Converse sneakers, and a pink hoodie will have to do. “Thank you. And thank you for allowing me to stay.”
“That was your father’s idea.”
Taken aback, I glance around the room, searching for him.
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