by Annie Groves
‘Seb was to be my escort for the evening. We hadn’t met until then. He was sort of related to Bella’s late husband.
‘There was a bit of an accident when Bella stood on my dress, and it got badly torn. I was so upset that I let on to Seb what had happened and how the dress wasn’t really mine. Then, of course, when I got home I had to own up to Mum as well. That was the worst bit. I’d just been offered the chance to train as a nurse, you see, and she’d been so proud of me, and now here I was as good as admitting to have pinched a frock from work. I thought I’d have to stay on at Lewis’s to pay for it, and it would have served me right if I had, but Seb only went and bought the dress to save me.’ Grace’s whole face lit up with love and pride. ‘Wasn’t that a wonderful thing to do?’
‘Yes, it was,’ Katie agreed fervently.
‘Anyway, that’s enough about me,’ Grace told her with a smile. ‘How are you enjoying working at the censorship place?’
‘I like working with the other girls, and the work is important, of course, but sometimes it makes you feel uncomfortable reading other people’s private letters, you know. Some of them have such sad things in them, like when a girl’s writing to say that she’s found someone else. When I’m reading that kind I always wish that I didn’t have to send them on.’
‘What are you two looking so glum about?’ Seb asked as the men came back with the drinks – beer for themselves and shandy for the girls – and sat down.
‘Katie was just saying that it upsets her when she reads Dear John letters,’ Grace explained to her fiancé.
‘The worst are when it’s a letter telling someone that there’s been a death at home – you know, from the bombs.’
‘You haven’t found any in secret spy code then yet?’ Luke teased Katie.
She had hesitated just that bit too long, Katie recognised, as she saw the way that they were all looking at her.
‘No,’ she answered. ‘Nothing like that.’
She was feeling a bit uncomfortable when Seb gave a brisk approving nod of his head as though in response to her lack of response, followed by a small smile.
Had he guessed from the way she’d hesitated what had happened? Katie worried guiltily.
‘It’s much the same for us in the “Y” Section,’ Seb was saying, as though he wanted to reassure her. ‘We have to listen in to things we’d rather not, at times, but it is for the good of the country, and ultimately it can save lives.’
Grace was smiling at her and so too was Luke, Katie realised, suddenly feeling her heart lift and a rush of happiness spread through her. It felt as though she had suddenly been accepted into some special and very private club.
After that the evening went from good to even better, and just when Katie thought that it could not possibly be improved on, at the end of a particularly energetic swing dance number – during which she and Luke had ended up with the floor to themselves and being applauded by the other dancers – as Luke guided her back to their table, his hand still holding hers, he told her with a grin, ‘Mum was right: you are a terrific dancer.’
‘You’re good too,’ Katie returned the compliment.
‘The twins taught me and Grace.’
‘My mother taught me.’
‘I dare say you must find my parents a bit dull after your own.’
They had almost reached the table. Katie stopped and turned to him, saying quietly and truthfully, ‘I love living with your parents and the twins. It’s what I’ve always longed for, to be part of a proper family. My parents’ lives may seem glamorous but they aren’t. My father works most evenings and practises during the day. My mother is proud of his success, of course, but at the same time she misses the stage herself and wishes she was still there. I love my parents very much, but so often when I was growing up I longed for them to be like other people’s mothers and fathers. I know that must sound awful. It doesn’t mean that I don’t love them, because I do, but I still can’t help envying people like you and Grace.’
‘It doesn’t sound awful at all. It sounds honest.’
Katie discovered that she was looking at the neat fastening of Luke’s tie against the khaki of his shirt, unable to lift her gaze to his face because she knew his compliment had made her blush.
‘Friends?’ Luke asked her softly.
Now Katie did look at him and what she saw in his eyes made her own sting slightly with tears. Unable to speak, she merely nodded.
Luke squeezed her hand gently.
‘Come on, you two.’ Grace’s demand broke into the silence between them, causing them to hurry back to the table.
Nothing particular had been said but things had definitely changed between her and Luke, Katie knew. Now when he looked at her, he smiled, and his smile was slow and warm and very special, as though it was for her alone and as though they shared a secret that belonged to them alone.
They danced some numbers that were so fast that they were left breathless and laughing, but the slow numbers they sat out, leaving them to couples like Grace and Seb, who took advantage of the dimmed lights and slow beat to snuggle up close to one another.
That was, until the last dance of the evening. Then, as the lights dimmed and couples took to the floor, Luke stood up and held his hand out to her, and somehow Katie discovered that she was on her feet, and then they were on the dance floor and Luke was holding her close. So close that it seemed the most natural thing in the world for her head to rest on his shoulder when the music slowed even more, and his arms closed round her. The dance floor was packed with only enough room for couples to sway together, but no one was complaining; certainly not Katie.
‘I just hope there isn’t an air raid tonight,’ Katie murmured, thinking of the number of people packed into the ballroom.
‘Me too,’ Luke agreed. ‘At least not before I get to do this,’ he added huskily, and then before Katie could say or do anything he was brushing her lips very, very gently with his own.
A quiver of sweet delight ran through her. She had never expected when they had come out tonight that she would end the evening being held tight in Luke’s arms, never mind being kissed by him. But deep down inside herself and in secret, she had thought about Luke holding her and kissing her, hadn’t she, Katie made herself admit.
The last dance and the evening were over. Silent, her eyes brilliant with emotion, Katie queued for her coat wrapped in a cocoon of happiness.
It was only when they were all leaving the dance hall that Seb made another reference to Katie’s work, catching up with her on the stairs whilst Luke and Grace stopped to speak to someone they knew.
Putting his hand under her arm, Seb drew her to one side, saying approvingly, ‘You handled things very well earlier.’
Katie blushed. ‘Oh, thank you. I mean, I know that Luke was only teasing me.’
‘It’s only human nature to want to reply honestly and openly when someone close asks questions. Not that Luke is the sort that would ever want you to do the wrong thing, mind, but it’s easy to let something slip without meaning to, and you never know just who might be listening. It isn’t easy doing our sort of job – that’s why I feel I’m so lucky with Grace. She understands that sometimes things are going on at work that I can’t discuss with her. It’s all about trust in the end, you see, Katie: the Government’s trust in us and our trust in those we love and theirs in us. People in our line of business know how important that trust is.
‘If you have any problems at work then the proper person to discuss them with is your superior, of course, but if ever anyone outside your work starts to make you feel uncomfortable or ask you questions and you want to talk about that to someone, then I’m always here.’
‘You’re very kind,’ Katie thanked him shyly.
Luke had no idea how things had moved so far so fast. One minute, or so it seemed now, he had been thinking how wrong he had been about Katie, and then the next she had felt so sweet and soft in his arms that he had just not been able to resist kissi
ng her. But then he had been thinking about what it would be like to kiss Katie for what felt like a very long time, hadn’t he? Right from the first time he had seen her, in fact.
They were in the middle of a war, Luke reminded himself, and he was in uniform. Falling head over heels in love with a girl and hoping that she would fall head over heels back just wasn’t a responsible thing to do.
The chivalrous instincts Luke had inherited from his father were a very strong part of his personality. They warned him now that Katie was a sweet girl, a girl whom he needed to protect from the heartache that came with falling in love and then being separated in wartime – or worse. She had been so darling and sweetly responsive when he had kissed her. So much so that he desperately wanted to do so again.
Just before they left the Grafton, Grace tapped Luke on the shoulder, saying quietly to him, ‘I take it that you’re over Lillian then, now?’
‘Lillian?’ Luke pretended to look blank. ‘Who’s she?’
Grace was delighted that her brother was finally over the heartbreak caused by Lillian Green, the nurse who had started her training with Grace, and who had made it clear that she was only interested in finding herself a rich husband – but only after she had stolen Luke’s heart. But even so …
‘Katie isn’t like Lillian, Luke,’ she warned her brother. ‘I don’t think she’s so much as been out with a boy, never mind been—’
‘Katie’s safe with me, Grace, so you don’t need to go giving me any warnings,’ Luke stopped his sister firmly. ‘I’ll be looking out for her just as much as I’d be looking out for one of my own sisters.’
‘You weren’t looking very brotherly towards her when I saw you smooching her during the last dance,’ Grace felt bound to point out.
‘That’s mine and Katie’s business; just as you and Seb smooching is yours,’ Luke informed his sister.
Grace was tempted to point out that she and Seb were engaged, but remembering what her mother had said to her about her hopes with regard to Katie and Luke, Grace recognised that it would probably be better to say nothing.
Luke could be stubborn and he had his pride – he was a man after all – and he wouldn’t want to think that his mother and his sister were standing on the sidelines and keeping their fingers crossed that he and Katie recognised just how perfect they were for one another.
FOURTEEN
‘Bettina and her mother are lovely, aren’t they? And so very brave. It must be terrible to have to leave your home and your country behind and go and live somewhere else, not knowing where you might end up.’
Bella and Laura had just left the church and were heading back to Bella’s house along Lancaster Road.
‘Obviously the Polanskis were fortunate because they were billeted with you, but anyone can see that they must have been very comfortably circumstanced in their own country, and it must be dreadfully hard to bear if one ends up billeted somewhere grim,’ Laura gushed, patently unable to stop talking about Jan and his family.
Torn between irritation over Laura’s praise for the Polanskis, and pride that Laura had recognised the superiority of her own home, Bella was forced to produce a lukewarm smile instead of giving vent to her real feelings about her billetees.
‘And wasn’t it lucky that Jan was home on leave and kind enough to go down to the school with us and help us sort out that delivery we got yesterday?’ Laura continued happily.
Now Bella could feel her irritation growing. It hadn’t pleased her one little bit to see the new friend she had been so proud of so plainly impressed by a Polish fighter pilot yesterday when the Polanskis had arrived back at Bella’s house whilst she was entertaining Laura. In fact, she had felt obliged to point out several times during the evening that Jan was a refugee and that it was only thanks to the British Government that he was safe and able to fly anything.
Laura had ignored her, though, to say enthusiastically to Jan, ‘I’ve got a cousin in the RAF and he was full of praise for the Polish pilots for their bravery during the Battle of Britain.’
Long before the evening had ended, Bella had been regretting inviting Laura to have supper with her and then stay for the weekend. When she had given that invitation Bella had envisaged an evening discussing Bella’s own plans for building up her role as Laura’s assistant to the point where it carried a proper title that Bella could use to let her parents know how important her war work was compared with Daphne’s. However, when all three of the Polanskis had come in unexpectedly, Bettina and her mother having apparently met Jan from the station, and Laura had immediately somehow or other taken it for granted that the billetees were welcome to sit down and have dinner with them, Bella had had no option but to grit her teeth and let herself be swept along by Laura’s enthusiasm.
Before too long Laura and Jan had been laughing together as Jan claimed to be an expert chef, his self-confidence greeted by adoring smiles from his mother and amused ones from his sister, whilst Bella had found herself without any role to play and virtually relegated to the role of ignored onlooker of the fun that everyone else, but especially Laura and Jan, seemed to be having.
Of course, the fact that Jan was visiting – something she had not been consulted about or had her permission requested for – had meant that there was no proper spare bedroom for Laura, and even now Bella didn’t know just why she had felt that savage stab of anger when Jan had grinned and said that Laura was welcome to share his bed.
Of course, Laura had done no such thing. Naturally she had slept with Bella in Bella’s room. That had meant that Bella had hardly had any sleep at all, her rest disturbed because she just wasn’t used to sharing a room with anyone. Nothing to do with the fact that she had been listening to make sure that Laura didn’t take advantage of the sleeping household to take Jan up on his offer.
‘You must let me know the next time Jan’s home on leave,’ Laura told Bella enthusiastically, now.
Bella had originally planned to make sure that Laura sang her own praises in front of her mother after church, but she had been so irritated by Laura’s constant references to Jan and his family that she hadn’t bothered. And now Laura was still going on about him.
‘I bet he’s a good dancer, Bella. Have you ever danced with him?’
‘No,’ Bella answered her shortly.
‘Maybe we could get up a party for one of the Tennis Club dances? Oh, I wonder what’s going on over there.’
Relieved to have a change of subject, Bella looked across the road to where a work party of three men were working frantically and at much greater speed than was usual, to remove some of the rubble of a collapsed building.
Laura crossed the road, leaving Bella no option but to follow her.
‘What’s happening?’ Laura asked the closest of the men.
‘We think there’s a kiddie still alive under this lot. We heard it crying a while back. Thought it were a cat at first, we did, and then Harry there said, no, he thought it were a kiddie. Then someone came along and said how there’d bin a new baby born to the family wot lived here.’
A baby buried under all those tons of rubble and still alive. How could that be possible? Babies were so fragile and vulnerable. Bella placed her hand against her own body, filled with a mixture of anger and pain.
The man who had been speaking to them broke off his conversation to take a pack of Gold Flake cigarettes from the boy on the bicycle who had just cycled up to him saying, ‘Here you are, Uncle Billy. Our nan says that’s nine pence you owe her.’
‘Come on, Billy,’ the other two men working on the rubble with their picks called.
‘These houses were bombed four nights ago,’ Bella pointed out. ‘It’s impossible for anyone still to be alive under the rubble, never mind a small baby.’
The nearest of the men replied, without stopping working, ‘Aye, we thought that an’ all, until we heard it crying.’
‘Do you think Jan will still be at your house? I know Maria said that she’d have a Sunday lunch waiti
ng for us when we got back, but she didn’t say anything about Jan being there, and I’d like to thank him for all the help he gave us.’
Bella looked at Laura impatiently, on the point of reminding her that she had already done that, and more than once, when one of the men gave a shout and delved into the rubble, pushing it aside with his bare hands.
Within seconds the other two men had joined him and nothing could have wrenched Bella away from the spot where she stood, the whole of her attention focused on what was happening in front of her, totally oblivious to everything else.
Other people had come to see what was going on, but it was Bella who was the closest and she was the first to see when one of them lifted the child – a few months old, no more, Bella guessed – from the rubble.
She – it was a girl from her clothes – was filthy and covered in dust, her mouth and nose rimed with soot and soil.
A first-aider had stepped forward to take the baby and was deftly removing the dirt from her mouth, allowing her to cry lustily.
‘Can someone hold her for a moment?’ the first-aider asked, and without thinking Bella stepped forward to take her.
She was filthy, her face and clothes covered in dust and earth, but Bella still held her close.
‘Yours, is she, love?’ an elderly woman, who had stopped to see what was going on, asked Bella sympathetically.
Bella shook her head. The baby was nuzzling her, and grizzling. A sharp pang of pain gripped Bella inside as though her womb had tightened, her breasts suddenly aching.
‘Thanks ever so. I’ll take her now.’ The first-aider was reaching out to take the baby.
Bella frowned, holding the baby tighter as she stepped back until she realised what she was doing. Angrily she thrust the baby into the first-aider’s arms and then turned on her heel, hurrying to rejoin Laura, who was standing several yards away and looking impatient. Several yards away – and yet Bella had no memory of having moved closer to the rubble or of having left Laura, and yet she realised she must have done. Why? Just because of the baby? No, of course not. What did she care about babies? Nothing! It was girls like her cousin Grace who went all soft and misty-eyed over babies, not her.