“Then you should be in bed,” he said finally. He placed his hand on her face, feeling her forehead then her cheek. “You don’t have a fever,” he pointed out. “In fact, you feel cool.” Cold and clammy was more like it, but he didn’t tell her that.
“I could go to the convenience store up the street and get you some clear soda,” he suggested. She might have lied to him about having the flu, but it didn’t change the fact that even in the darkness of the room, she looked pale. Even her eyes looked too glassy and large on her face. There was obviously something wrong with her somewhere.
She grabbed his hand tightly. “No, don’t leave me.”
“Jus, what happened?”
She shook her head. “I don’t…I had a bad dream.”
“How about if I make you a cup of tea?” He was truly at a loss of what to do for her, especially if she wasn’t going to tell him what was wrong. Maybe all she’d had was a bad dream. That on top of working the murder case was capable of leaving her out of sorts.
She nodded. “That would be nice.”
“Let me take you up to bed first so you can lie down. No more sitting in the kitchen in the dark.” He hoped he kept his worry out of his voice, that he simply sounded like a husband with a wife suffering with the flu. Maybe after some tea, she’d be able to talk to him. Maybe if she told him about her dream, he could slay the dragon for her.
“That sounds good. I don’t like the dark,” she said. She let him pull her from the chair.
With his arm around her, he led her up the stairs to the bedroom. He turned on the small lamp on the table beside the bed, and he left it on, even after she climbed into bed and he tucked the covers up under her chin.
She smelled like the soft scent of the soap she always used. She must have taken a bath a short time before. Her hair was damp.
“How many more nights do you work before you’re back on days?”
He gave her a quizzical look, but since she wasn’t looking at him, she didn’t see it. She was usually more aware of his schedule than he was. “Tonight’s my last one for a while. Why?”
“I just wondered.”
“I’ll be right back with the tea.”
“I’ll be here.”
The flat tone of her voice scared him more than anything. “Good,” he said. As long as she wasn’t sitting at the kitchen table looking lost any more. He went back to the kitchen, so worried about his wife that he wasn’t tired any more.
What was so big, she thought she couldn’t tell him? Had Madison threatened her in some way? Or perhaps simply frightened her into having horrifying nightmares?
He made them both a hot cup of tea. She drank hers while sitting up in bed. Dan drank his as he moved about the room, getting ready for bed. He finished it off after his quick shower. There wasn’t much hot water anyway. She must have used it all.
Back in the bedroom, he found her asleep, her half filled cup of tea on the bedside table. For a moment, he looked down at his sleeping wife in the soft light of the lamp. In her sleep, all her worries melted from her expression, leaving her as lovely as always. Her dark lashes rested against her olive cheeks.
God, how he loved her. He reached down and brushed the flawless skin of her face with his fingertips. Hopefully in the morning she could tell him what bothered her so he could help her fix it.
Quietly, he slipped into bed beside her.
He thought she was asleep, but when he turned off the light, she cried out. “No, don’t turn off the light. I’m afraid.”
She’d always been afraid of the dark. But now he couldn’t help but wonder what was in the dark that scared her more than usual and yet had her sitting in it in the kitchen. He turned it back on. Then he took her in his arms. She shifted and fit against him.
Dan watched Justine sleep long into the night. Even with the light on, he couldn’t find the answers to the questions that plagued him. He hoped whatever it was that bothered her, she would tell him about it soon. He couldn’t keep the questions bottled up inside himself for long. Just as he couldn’t stand seeing her looking so lost.
****
She never shared that bad dream with him. As the weeks went by, he couldn’t help but notice she seemed to be fighting a battle within herself. Every time he asked, she insisted it was the murder case she defended. She also insisted nothing was wrong. He was certainly glad she finished the closing argument, and so was she. The damned trial lasted another seven weeks. Dan never again found her sitting alone in the kitchen in the dark. Nor did his questions get answered and she shared no secrets with him. But he did have another sleepless night.
As he drove, Dan thought about the night after closing arguments for Madison’s murder trial. He recognized that night as another important piece of the puzzle he was trying put together. He just had no idea where or how it fit in with Justine.
****
One Week Ago
“You’re going to have to learn some patience, Counselor,” Dan said softly.
“Easy for you to say,” Justine replied, tapping her fingertips lightly on the table. “I still can’t believe this trial dragged on as long as it did.”
“Drink this,” he said as he slid a steaming mug of something in front of her.
“What is it?”
“Decaf.”
Justine took a sip of the hot coffee and sighed. “Decaf won’t help. I doubt I’d be able to sleep even if you fed me warm milk.”
“Honey, the jury quit deliberations for the night to give those people some rest. You aren’t going to hear anything before morning, anyway.”
“I know,” Justine put in. “But I just can’t sleep. Deliberations shouldn’t have gone on this long to begin with. What if he is found guilty? What if there was some evidence I missed or something I didn’t present as well as I could have?”
Taking both her hands in his, Dan pulled to him before he wrapped her in his embrace. “You’ve got to calm down. It’s not doing anyone any good by being all keyed up like you are.” Gently, he slid his fingers down the length of her spine.
He felt a knot in her shoulder and he massaged her. “What if he doesn’t get off?” she asked for the thousandth time.
“Jus, there’s nothing more you can do. If Paulie Madison gets convicted for murder, the only thing you can do is put in for an appeal,” Dan replied.
“This waiting is driving me out of my mind.”
“I know.”
Dan breathed in the soft flowery scent of her hair, liking the way Justine was pressed against his chest.
“Will you come with me to the courthouse in the morning?” Justine asked.
“I don’t have to be to work until three for the evening shift, so yes, I’ll stay with you all day if you want me to,” Dan promised.
“Thank you.”
“Do you want to go to bed?” he asked.
“I don’t think so.”
“I could take your mind off the trial,” he offered, his voice filled with uninhibited desire.
It was enough to cause her to smile. “I don’t think now is a good time. I wouldn’t want to take the chance of having my thoughts anywhere but on you. And I don’t know if I could push aside the thoughts of this case.”
“I understand.” He didn’t say anything about the fact that they hadn’t had a ‘good time’ for the past several weeks. The trial took up all her attention.
But, he didn’t let her go.
“Just hold me. I want nothing more than get lost in your arms. It’s the only place on earth I feel absolutely safe and secure. I wish you could hold me forever,” she said softly.
“You know I would if I could,” he replied.
“I love you, Dan,” she said.
“I love you, too.”
He held her for a long time. And since neither of them felt ready for bed, he moved her to the couch after turning on the television. There was a movie on, and Dan watched it half-heartedly. He figured Justine didn’t watch it at all, but she said nothing,
content to lie in his arms.
He knew it was hard for her to concentrate on anything other than Paulie Madison and the twelve people who held his fate in their hands. She finally slept in his arms, there on the couch. He could tell by her easy, even breathing. He was happy to stay there all night.
“Have some O.J.,” Dan offered the next morning.
“No thanks,” she replied, to his surprise. When he looked at her, she went on, “I don’t think I can eat or drink anything.”
“You’ve got to have something. I’d hate to have to pick you up off the floor after you faint in front of the entire courtroom.” He turned his attention back to the contents of the fridge. “Want some milk?”
“No, just maybe some toast to settle my stomach,” Justine said, more to herself than to him.
“What? Do you really feel sick?” He turned again and looked at her, the carton of milk in his hand, concern etching his features.
“Yeah, but I’m sure I’ll be all right after this is over. It’s probably just the stress from the case.”
He watched her for a long time. Now that he really looked at her, he saw how pale she was. “After this is over, I want you to rest.”
He noticed her smile was forced. “That sounds like a plan.”
Dan winked at her. He knew she’d never agree to stay home today, no matter how bad she looked or felt. So he’d help her the best he could. “Wheat toast, coming right up.”
“You’re too good for me.”
“Just remember that when this case is over, and I come home crabby after a rough shift,” Dan said as he pulled out the toaster.
“I’ll try.” She tried to smile at him again, but wasn’t very successful.
Her stomach must really feel awful, given the look on her face, Dan thought. She sat down at the table.
A moment later, Dan placed a plate of toast in front of her.
“Are you okay?” he asked.
“It’s just weird. The toast smells good. But I don’t think I want to eat it.” She closed her eyes for a moment and rubbed her temples with her fingers.
Then to his surprise, she picked up a piece and took a bite.
Damn, he’d be glad when this case was over. This was horrible to watch.
By the time he finished his own toast, he couldn’t help but notice her color was back. He supposed all she needed was something in her stomach.
“Feeling better?” he asked.
“Yes.” Her smile was no longer forced. “Much.”
Dan drove her to court and waited with her in the hallway outside the courtroom.
“I don’t like that this deliberation has gone on so long. They should have reached a verdict long before now. It’s probably not a very good sign in my favor,” Justine whispered.
Dan took her hand and her palm was sweaty. He held it anyway.
“Jus, it hasn’t even been a full day, considering the closing arguments ended yesterday.”
“I know, but still I think if the jury was going to acquit him, we should have heard something before now.”
“Don’t take this wrong, but I hope you don’t do too many murder trials,” Dan said.
“I hope I don’t, too.”
He led her to a bench and they sat down.
That was when the word came. The jury had reached a verdict.
The next few minutes were pure torture. Dan watched Justine as she sat in her chair in the courtroom. He recognized the way she did her best to keep her emotions from reaching her expression and not squirm.
He kept watching her. She looked as if she stopped breathing as the judge ordered the defendant to stand, and he hoped she didn’t faint.
She didn’t, and Dan never took his gaze from her.
She stood beside Paulie Madison and stared at the jury foreman.
Then, Dan saw she actually bit her lip as the verdict was read. She obviously did it to keep from letting out in a cheer when the jury foreman read that they had found Paulie Madison not guilty of first-degree murder.
It was over. Dan let out his own sigh of relief.
Justine shook hands with Paulie Madison and the other appropriate people. She’d done her job. She’d won. Paulie Madison was free. There was no guessing what the future held for a man like him, but Dan didn’t care. He was proud of his wife.
He didn’t approach her right away, allowing her to relish in the wonderful feeling of lightness she must feel now that the tremendous weight of the case was lifted off her shoulders.
Paulie Madison left her side to join his happy family.
Justine looked back at Dan, and she returned the small smile he sent her way.
He gave her a thumbs up.
Justine nodded to him.
Before his eyes, he saw the color drain from her face. She sat back down in the seat she’d just vacated.
What was wrong with her? Maybe this case had been too much. Maybe it wasn’t the case at all, maybe she was really sick.
He reached her in the span of a heartbeat, nearly climbing over seats to get to her.
“Jus?”
“I just got dizzy. I’m sure it’s just the excitement. I’ll be all right in a minute.”
“Are you sure?” It looked more than excitement to him.
She forced a smile. “I’m sure. Please don’t make a big deal about it.”
Before either of them could say more, Clifford stepped up. “Justine, you did a great job.”
“Thanks, Clifford.”
“I want you to take a week off.”
“A week?” She stared at him.
Dan wondered if she was still dizzy or if Clifford noticed how pale she looked.
“Yes, you’ve earned it.”
“Thanks, Clifford,” she said again.
“Don’t thank me until you come back all rested and ready for the next case.”
Justine held up a hand to stop any further explanation. “Don’t tell me now. I’m not up to hearing about anything new. I don’t think I slept but maybe an hour or two, and I need some rest.”
“Fine, I’ll see you later.”
They waved him away.
With his arm around her, Dan led her back out into the hall near the bench they’d sat on together before the jury returned. “Well, Counselor, do you feel up to celebrating.”
“Sure,” she said.
Dan put his hand on the small of her back, and she shivered.
“Cold?” Dan asked.
“Maybe a little,” she replied.
“Maybe you really are coming down with something,” he said, his voice laced with concern.
“Oh, I think I’ll be all right. Especially since I get to spend the next week laying around and watching television.”
“And I know I’ve got to work this evening, but then I’ve got the next several days off. We could do something. Or we could just be bums together.”
They reached the doors and stepped out into the cool fall day. The season was in full swing, and the trees outside the courthouse were filled with leaves of brilliant red, orange and yellow. They fell like snow around Dan and Justine as they made their way to Dan’s truck.
Dan took her home, and Justine wasted no time making her way to the bedroom where she peeled off the suit she wore and climbed under the covers of their bed.
Dan came in a moment later staring at her with concern. “Can I get you anything? Aspirin, a cup of tea?”
“No thanks,” she replied. “It just feels good to lie down.”
Slowly, he crossed the room. Near the bed, he started to undress.
“What are you doing?”
“I didn’t get much sleep last night, either,” Dan explained. “I thought I’d take a nap before I have to go in to work. All right?”
“Of course, it’s all right,” she said quickly.
He climbed under the covers beside her. He turned toward her. Justine shifted so she could fit up against him.
“Hold me,” she said. “Just hold me.”
D
an took her in his arms. “How’s this?” he asked quietly.
“Tighter,” she requested.
He held her until he had to get up and leave to go to work. Damn, the last thing he wanted was to leave her.
“I feel better already. I think I’ll watch some TV while I wait for you to come home.”
“I think there’re a couple of cans of chicken noodle soup in the pantry if you get hungry,” he suggested.
“Maybe I’ll try that later.”
“I’ll see you when I get home.” He kissed her.
She melted against him and held him tight. “I’ll be here.”
Chapter 25
Five Days Ago
For the first time in a long time, Dan had an easy shift. A few speeders and a few kids under eighteen out after curfew summed up his evening. He was very thankful to get home to Justine on time instead of hours late because he had reports to write. It was a nice ending since he now had a few days off.
“Are you feeling better?” he asked when he found Justine in the kitchen at eleven thirty making sandwiches. Since her trial had ended two days before, she seemed to teeter totter between feeling better and still not wanting to eat, but he thought she was on the road to recovery.
“Yeah,” she replied. “I think so.”
The nagging feeling that she was keeping something from him still lingered. Maybe soon she’d be able to talk about it. But for now she still wouldn’t share with him any of the deep, dark secrets she might be harboring. So despite the fact that her color was better and she had toasted the cheese sandwiches and soup she’d made for them, Dan still watched her. And whenever she caught him watching her, he gave her a smile.
He noticed there were still circles under her eyes. Either she’d been crying or she was in shock or overtired. He wanted to shake the answers from her, but he’d rather she shared with him what was wrong.
“Steve invited us over tomorrow afternoon,” he told her.
“What for?” she asked.
“He’s grilling steaks and hamburgers as a farewell party for Jack Fillbrook.”
“Do I have to go?”
“No, you don’t have to, but it would be nice to have you with me.”
“Is Jack leaving town, too, after his last day on the force?”
A Twist of Betrayal Page 17