by Amy DuBoff
The door hissed and opened to the corridor.
“Okay,” Saera affirmed. “Well, good luck with the meeting.”
“Thanks.”
Saera flashed him a meek smile and hurried away into the hall.
Wil let out a slow breath when she was gone. How much longer can I hide my feelings for her? But he knew he wasn’t fooling anyone.
* * *
Saera stared at her tablet but wasn’t getting any work done. She had become the star student of all her classes. She had the respect of her peers, if not their friendship. But still, everything felt like it was about to fall apart.
Her last practice session with Wil kept replaying in her mind. Am I imagining that glance, that touch? Or did it really happen? The line between study session and date had begun to blur some time ago, but their interactions had never crossed the line into unprofessional conduct.
“Is everything all right?” Elise asked from across the room. They were alone.
Elise had proven herself to be the only remaining friend in Saera’s cohort, always lending an ear when Saera was having a difficult day. Observant and inquisitive by nature, she always knew when something was wrong.
I wish I could talk about it with her, but I can’t. “I’m fine.”
“It’s about all of those evenings you spend away ‘studying,’ isn’t it? Like tonight.”
Saera looked down.
“Who is he?”
“I never said anything about a person!”
Elise gave a coy smile. “You can’t spend that much time with someone and not develop some feelings. If you were studying alone, you’d just be here in the room like any other night.”
The logic was too sound for Saera to refute. “Nothing will ever happen between us.”
“But you’d like for there to be something,” Elise pressed.
Saera nodded. I’d be lying to myself if I said I didn’t. I wish that weren’t the case.
“So go for it. You already said it will never happen, so what do you have to lose?”
“Our friendship, for one.” He’ll never accept me. Not with my past.
“Could you really stay friends, as things are now? If you already feel this way, how will it be after years of pretending like there’s nothing there?”
Saera’s stomach knotted. “You’re right.” What am I going to do?
* * *
Wil drummed his fingers on the tabletop. Are they ever going to stop talking?
Next to him, his father looked equally irked.
The representatives from Tararia were exactly the kind of dry business cogs Wil detested. Unlike Allen, the initial negotiator, these representatives got hung up on the minutia without seeing the big picture. At every juncture, they attempted to overturn agreements that were already signed in writing. The discussion had already been underway for three hours and they were getting nowhere. The cramped conference room in the TSS spaceport suspended above the moon was never intended for such lengthy conversations.
“I’ll oversee all applications within the TSS. And, exclusivity or not, I won’t even consider a civilian model until after the technology has been thoroughly tested in the field,” Wil reiterated for the fourth time.
“We’d like to have the terms for the civilian system documented. Two years is not a very long lead time,” Kaven, the representative, asserted again.
Wil crossed his arms. “I’m not making any decisions about a potential civilian navigation system at this time. That’s final.”
Kaven looked like he wanted to swear under his breath. “The initial agreement—”
“The initial agreement stated 200 billion credits for two years of exclusivity,” Cris interrupted. “Nowhere did it say anything about the Priesthood having a say after that two-year term. If you want to void that, we can go to SiNavTech right now.”
“No, no,” Kaven hastily cut in. “We will honor the original terms.”
Cris’ eyes narrowed behind his tinted glasses. “So what’s the holdup? Let’s sign.”
Kaven looked at the holographic model of the independent jump drive projected above his tablet. “This technology is going to change the nature of space travel as we know it. Don’t you want to be prepared?”
“I think we’ll manage,” Wil replied. “We have a pretty good family history to fall back on.”
Cris smiled. “The Priesthood isn’t in a position to make demands.”
Kaven shifted in his chair. He stared down at the tablet, his face drawn.
“So do we have an agreement?” Cris asked.
Kaven looked to his colleagues. They nodded. “Yes, agreed.”
Wil leaned back in his chair, relieved the discussion was finally over. “Where do I sign?”
Kaven minimized the jump drive model projected from his tablet and brought up a text file. “Here are the final terms for you to review,” he said as he handed the tablet to Wil.
Wil read through the file with his father looking over his shoulder to make sure everything was in order. It was exactly as they discussed. “All right.”
Wil tapped on the signature box and input the code for reading his Dynastic ID chip. A purple light projected from the bottom edge of the tablet. He exposed his left wrist and passed it under the light, illuminating the serpent Sietinen crest invisible to the naked eye. The crest and his full birth name appeared in the signature box. He handed the tablet back to Kaven.
Kaven inspected the seal. “Very good. The funds will be wired to the specified account within twenty-five hours.”
“Thank you.” Wil inclined his head and rose alongside his father.
Kaven stood and bowed to them as they exited.
Two Militia officers went to retrieve the representatives as Wil and Cris headed toward the transport hub of the spaceport.
“Thank the stars that’s over!” Wil exclaimed.
His father smiled. “Congratulations. You just became very rich.”
“I was already rich.”
“It’s different when you earn it rather than inheriting.”
“I don’t feel like I earned anything. I was just doing my job,” Wil said.
“Regardless, you solved a problem no one else could. That’s something worth celebrating.”
“Celebrating anything right now doesn’t seem right, knowing what’s coming.”
Cris sighed. “It’s like your birthday all over again.”
Wil frowned. “Turning sixteen might mean something on Tararia, but I already had the privileges that came with being of ‘legal age’ through the TSS. All it meant was being another year closer to the war.”
“I don’t want to get into it again.”
“Well, I’m late for my study session with Saera, anyway.” Wil headed for one of the waiting transport shuttles to the moon’s surface.
“I’ll see you around,” his father said.
“You’re not coming down?”
“I need to check in on the Vanquish. They were doing some sort of systems upgrade with the rift drive nav.”
“Okay, see you,” Wil said as he boarded the shuttle. Saera was waiting.
*
Wil jogged down the hall toward the study room for his tutoring session with Saera. Some quiet time was exactly what he needed after the nightmare he’d just been through with the licensing negotiations. It had forced Wil to face the reality of what production of the independent jump drive signified. The TSS was building a fleet. A fleet he would command. And that time was approaching all too quickly.
He came around a corner just in time to see Saera entering their usual room. The glimpse of her was enough to lift his spirits. I never thought someone could have that effect on me.
Wil slowed to a walk as he approached the room. He palmed open the door.
Inside, Saera was slumped in her usual chair, absently staring at the wall.
“Hey, sorry I’m late,” Wil said as he entered.
Saera came to. “I just got here, myself.”
> Wil sat down across from her. “I’m glad I didn’t keep you waiting.”
She shook her head. “Actually, I almost cancelled on you.”
That’s never happened before. “Why, is something wrong?”
She shrugged off his question. “I just have a lot on my mind.”
“Well, I’m glad you didn’t. I really need some time away from… everything else.” Wil sighed. “But truth be told, going over jump drive navigation is the last thing I want to do right now.”
Saera looked relieved. “You too?”
“Do you want to just, I don’t know, ‘hang out’ instead of studying?” Did I just ask her out?
Saera’s shock was apparent. “Uh… what did you have in mind?”
“We could just go back to my quarters and watch a movie or play some video games.” That certainly sounds like a date.
“What about your roommates?”
“I’m the only one there right now. One just graduated, and Andy is away on his internship. The other one… won’t bother us.”
Saera paused in thought. “Okay, sure. Why not?”
“All right. Meet me at room JAP-234. If anyone gives you trouble about entering the Junior Agent wing, just say that you’re getting help from your TA on an assignment.”
Saera nodded. “Okay.”
Wil smiled. “I’ll see you soon.” Stars! This is getting dangerously close to that line I’m not supposed to cross.
Wil made his way back to his quarters, with Caeron following at some distance behind in his usual fashion. When they arrived, Wil called Caeron inside.
“Saera is coming over,” Wil explained, “and I’d like you to stay away for the evening.”
Caeron looked glum. “I hesitate to distance myself too much.”
Wil held back his annoyance and patiently replied, “I know, but I assure you there’s nothing to worry about. And I promise I won’t leave here without you.”
Caeron gave a slight bow. “As you wish.” He exited to the hallway.
Wil took a quick survey of the common room and decided that it was in sufficient order. Though he rarely had company over, the room was set up well for socializing with plush couches oriented around a coffee table and viewscreen.
A moment later, there was a buzz at the entry. He checked the screen next to the door and saw Saera standing outside. Seeing the image of her there in the hall, Wil’s nerves set in. Outside the context of a classroom, Saera looked far too lovely for Wil to trust himself around her.
“Hi, thanks for coming,” he greeted her while opening the door. This was a terrible idea.
Saera smiled. “Thanks. This was a great idea.”
Stars! Wil stood aside to let her in. “It’s been far too long since I’ve just had a mellow evening like this.” He closed the door.
“I know the feeling.” Saera looked around the room. “So this is what Junior Agent quarters look like.”
“It’s nothing too fancy. There are four private bedrooms, and the bathroom is at the back.”
“I’m looking forward to it. Having roommates sucks.”
Especially when they’re all jealous of you. “I know what you mean.” Wil shifted on his feet, realizing they were still standing by the door. “Please, have a seat.”
He motioned Saera over to the couch. Saera sat down on one end of the couch facing the viewscreen on the side wall. Wil was tempted to sit right next to her, but elected to remain at a respectable distance on the opposite side of the couch. He removed his tinted glasses.
“So, what kind of entertainment selections do you have?” Saera asked.
Wil beamed. “Pretty much anything you can imagine. The TSS Mainframe has access to all of the media that was ever digitized—quite literally. No matter where the data is stored, we can call it up here in an instant. Subspace com relays are pretty amazing.”
Saera’s eyes widened with awe. “I’ve never come across the library. I had no idea.”
“Well, you need to have the right clearance level, of course. I just happen to have the access… by which I mean, I figured out how to hack the Mainframe when I was about nine-years-old, and they haven’t yet found a way to keep me out.”
Saera folded up her legs on the couch. “You can hack the Mainframe? I thought it was impossible to crack.”
“Not impossible. But, as far as I know, I’m the only one who can do it.” Except for the Bakzen, if they are given a backdoor. He pushed aside the thoughts of what had happened over a year before. “I am respectful about it, of course. I never go into personal files or anything that’s above my security clearance.”
“I’m impressed.” She looked Wil over. “How did you come to know so much about everything?”
Wil looked down. That question I can never answer… “I’m not like most people, Saera. I don’t try to show off—these skills just come naturally to me. When someone watches me master something after I see it demonstrated one time, they back away. No one knows how to act around me. You’re… you’re the only person I’ve met who treats me like a regular guy.”
Saera studied him. “Should I be treating you differently?”
“No! Please don’t. When I’m around you, I feel like I’m in control of my life. I feel like I can be… normal.”
Saera sat back on the couch. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I don’t at all think of you as ‘normal.’”
“What do you mean?”
Saera laughed. “Don’t be so serious all the time, Wil. I’ve seen you let go in some of our study and practice sessions. I know you have the capacity for fun.”
“Well, yes. But—”
“What I meant,” Saera went on, “is that you should be happy you’re not ‘normal.’ I’ve known a lot of regular people over the years, especially guys, and trust me—you don’t want to be associated with many of them.”
“I get the impression you’ve never really fit in, either.”
Saera looked down. “You could say that.” She paused in thought. “I’m on a different track than most of the other Trainees, aren’t I?”
Certainly if you keep spending time with me. “You have the talent for the Command track, if that’s what you want. Very few women ever follow the Primus Command track. It’s been at least five years since the last.”
Saera was incredulous. “Why is it so uncommon?”
“It requires a rare diversity of telekinetic and telepathic skills. But moreover, the Command track requires someone to make tough calls. Life or death decisions. Whether it be from social conditioning or some kind of innate predisposition, many women don’t want to make those kinds of choices. Shite, most men don’t, either, but there are enough societal pressures that they’ll more readily take it on.”
“In that case, what makes you think I’d have any interest?”
“Because you see alternatives. So many view a head-on conflict as the only solution, but you’re creative. You bring the kind of perspective that can balance out other leaders. Whether you’ve noticed or not, you’ve taught me a lot in our time together.”
Saera looked taken aback. “I have?”
“Absolutely.” And you’ve made me feel whole again. “But, I’m afraid that there isn’t a lot more I can teach you until your telekinetic abilities are more developed. You’re adept at basic freefall maneuvers now, and you’ve already learned more about navigation than most specialists.”
Saera drooped. “I don’t feel that way at all. We’ve hardly scratched the surface!”
“That’s true. But for now, I’ve done just about as much for you as I can.”
“But what about our time together?”
So it means something to her, too. “I don’t want that to stop.”
“So more nights like this?” She smiled cautiously.
“I’d like that.” But can we have it?
Saera looked at the viewscreen on the wall. “Well, anyway, I think we were going to watch something…”
“Yes, right. What did
you have in mind?”
“Oh, I know…” Saera got a mischievous glint in her eyes.
*
Wil and Saera had gravitated toward the center of the couch over the course of the movie, their shoulders touching and their feet propped up on the table in front of the couch.
“I’ve never seen so many blatant inaccuracies!” Wil exclaimed.
Saera laughed. “That’s the point. It was a parody.”
“So, you’re telling me you watch terrible things on purpose, for fun?”
“Precisely.”
“Why do I find that so weirdly charming?”
Saera grinned. “I knew you’d come to appreciate it. I told you to trust me.”
“I do.”
Their eyes met. It was the closest they’d been for any meaningful length of time, and they were at ease with each other. But the line was still there, keeping them apart as teacher and student. Wil wanted to lean in, to caress Saera, but he stopped himself.
She relaxed against him, her head nearly resting on his shoulder as they gazed at each other. “I trust you, too. More completely than I ever thought I could.” She looked at the blank viewscreen and pulled away a little.
Wil sensed a hurt in her. “Did something happen back on Earth?”
Saera drew into herself. “More than one thing. A series of misfortunes and bad decisions.” She shook her head.
“Tell me, Saera.” Wil took her hand. She flinched at first, but then entwined her fingers in his. The contact sent an energizing surge through him, fueling his desire to be close to her. “I want to understand how you came to be the person you are.”
Saera hesitated. “It’s not something I ever talk about.”
“Then some other time, when you’re ready.” I do want to know everything about her, the bad and the good.
Saera bit her lip, in thought. “No. I need to tell you, as much as I hate to admit it. You deserve to know.” She reoriented on the couch to face Wil, keeping a hold on his hand. She trembled as she took a slow breath. “I’ll give you the short version. My dad was married and had two kids. When the younger one was about four-years-old and the oldest one was six, he had an affair.”
Wil frowned involuntarily.
“I know, right?” Saera sighed. “Anyway, that affair was with my mom, and that’s how I came into being.”