“I do hope you realise what you have got yourself in to with Marc Sanders Isabel, because as has just been proven, first impressions count for nothing.”
With that she leaves. What in God’s name was that all about?
My head is all over the place; one part of it is remembering what Marc said about her being vindictive and the another is asking myself what she meant by what was just said. I was never good at riddles.
So I sit here for some time nursing the glass between my shaky hands and try to straighten out my thoughts. I am exhausted from trying to stay strong in her presence, but now in her absence I am a quivering mess. It is no good, in the past I was one for storing and bottling feelings until they were fit to burst. I am not going to do that this time; I’m a different person to what I was back then and so now I know I have to tell Marc.
Chapter 9
The journey on the bus seems to last a life time and so I listen to my ipod hoping that Ronan Keating will help ease the nerves. I need to continue to be open and honest with Marc, but still I haven’t got a clue as to what his reaction is going to be when I tell him what happened earlier today. The music also offers me some time to sit and contemplate while I watch the photogenic ‘Chocolate Box’ scenery go by and being on the top deck I have a magnificent view spanning miles. It is only when I realise that I have been singing “I Love It When We Do” a little too loud and quite possibly out of tune, that I note we are nearly there, as on the horizon is the obtrusive building that is Addenbrooke’s Hospital.
I have to turn the music off when I see my phone light up with an incoming call, on the display reads my ex-mother-in-laws name. Joseph, my youngest son has rang me every day so far to tell me what he has been up to at his grandparents, this has been; feeding the chickens that live in the garden to going to the seaside, or the going to visit the Imperial War Museum to baking fairy cakes. It has been great to hear the excitement in his voice and that he is enjoying himself, as well as being spoilt by the sounds of it. I was apprehensive at first about him coming down here, hence me staying over, but it looks like it has done him some good, a refreshing change to city life. Answering the call I am expecting to hear his voice so that he can tell me what adventure he is currently having or had.
“Isabel, it’s Rose.” The usually monotone voice on the other end suddenly causes the hair on the back of my neck to stand.
“What is it Rose?” How is it that us mothers know when something isn’t right? I can sense straight away that something is wrong.
“It’s Joseph Isabel. He’s had an accident….” I cut her off before she can say anymore.
“Where are you Rose?” I have to get to my little man, like now!
“He has been brought to Addenbrooke’s, Accident and Emergency.” I can hear the concern in her voice and I release a string of four letter words, as I know that is not a good sign. West Suffolk hospital is the closest one to Bury St.Edmunds, which is where they were going today. They can easily deal with most incidents there, so for Joseph to be taken to Addenbrooke’s, it must be far more serious.
As much as I want to know all of the details, I just want to concentrate on getting to my sweet, sweet boy. I haven’t had to pray for our family under any sort of trauma circumstances for a long time, but right at this minute, I am pulling in all of His favours. This is my Joseph, my baby.
“I’m approaching the hospital now, so I’ll be there in a couple of minutes. Meet me in the reception please Rose.” I end the call and cover my mouth trying to stifle a sob. Despite my best efforts, I cannot stop the tears from forming. Why is it we always think the worse? I telephone Jackie to let her know what has happened, but not being able to pass on any more details I feel hopeless; she manages to calm me down and reassures me that until I know exactly how he is, I am not to worry.
As soon as the bus pulls into the stop I run as fast as my legs will physically take me, it’s amazing how you seem to find more strength when it comes to your children. The hospital is a huge site, but I easily find the emergency department.
“I have had a call to say my son; Joseph Chambers has been brought in.” Passing on his details including date and place of birth. I am drumming my fingers on the desk as I impatiently wait for her to tell me where he is.
“Isabel!” I turn to see Rose striding towards me her face looking drawn and grey.
“Rose, where is Joseph? What’s happened? Is he hurt or ill?” So many questions are constantly going over and over through my mind, I spill them out rapidly and I need all of the answers like yesterday.
Rose rubs my upper arm, in an attempt to try and calm me down. “He is just in a cubicle down the corridor. He is sitting up and you know what he is like, he’s a tough cookie, an adventurous tough cookie.” I know exactly what he is like, as he takes after me with his inquisitive nature.
“We were at the Abbey ruins and he was having one of his adventures when he slipped on the wet stone and banged the back his head, so they brought him here as a precautionary measure. There is an open wound, but he also complained of feeling sick, so we are just waiting to take him into x-ray and they want to makes sure he hasn’t suffered any concussion.”
The fact he is up and talking relieves some of the anxiety I am feeling, but I won’t rest completely until I see him. So as I round the corner to the cubicle, I virtually launch myself at him and give him the biggest hug I can. Letting go of him, I cup his head in my hands, looking at his pale face I also examine the damage that’s been caused from the fall. He has a huge egg shaped lump on his head and there is dried blood matted in his gorgeous blond hair. I sweep his fringe back off of his forehead and place lots of kisses up on him.
“Oh, my baby!” I sob as I comb the front of his blond hair with my fingers.
Joseph whines, “Mum, I’m eleven years old!” That’s my boy I think to myself.
For the next half an hour I never leave Joseph’s side, until he is taken down to the x-ray department, where all I can do is pace around in the waiting area as I hang on for news. Some fifteen excruciating minutes later a porter wheels him out to us in his wheel chair. The radiologist informs me that we’ll have to hold on for a little while longer before we get to see a doctor with the results, so when we’re back in the cubicle I leave Joseph for 10 minutes with his grandma while I go and get some fresh air, and a coffee.
Standing outside drinking my cappuccino, I can still smell the stench of the hospital on my clothing making my stomach churn. I know it is psychological, but I can’t help it. I must have been out there for a few minutes when I hear my phone whistle; I really must change the notification ringtone on this thing. I will be honest with you, I had totally forgotten I’d got it with me as there is no signal within the hospital, so wouldn’t have known if anyone was trying to get a hold of me. So I rummage in my bag in an effort to find it. Once I finally get a hold of it I see there are two messages from Marc. Marc! Oh crap!
“Hello Isabel. I heard that you had a visitor earlier today; I do think we really need to talk. Please text or call me as soon as you read this. I’ll leave my phone on and you can contact me any time. M x”
Damn, I knew this would happen. I go on to read the second text.
“Isobel, please give me a chance to explain. Emelie is refusing to tell me why she came to see you and what you spoke about, I can only assume it has something to do with me, as she wouldn’t have bothered you otherwise. I have told you what she can be like and she loves throwing more fuel on to a raging fire. Please Isabel, just call me. M x”
I do know what she is like, she can be ruthless and heartless, but is she also sending me a warning. I have no idea who or what to believe, but I have to give Marc as much of a chance to explain, like I gave her a today. He didn’t want to talk about it yesterday or this morning, so with him starting to open up, or has he been forced to? I have to listen to him. Be that as it may, I can’t leave Joseph for the moment so a returning text will have to do for now.
“Hell
o Marc. I’m sorry I haven’t replied to your messages before now. I do want to hear what you have to say, but I can’t at the moment I’m afraid. Do not worry, but Joseph has been brought into Addenbrooke’s after an accident so I need to stay with him until I know he’s going to be Ok. Izzy x”
I exhale slowly. If it doesn’t rain, it pours! Alerting me to a text, I open the message.
“I’m on my way. M x” What? No way, he can’t be, he can’t just drop everything. I try calling his number, but it goes straight to his voice mail saying he’s driving so can’t take my call.
Chapter 10
“I can’t see any damage done to the bone and there doesn’t seem to be any fluid underneath either. You will however require a few stitches; I think you’ve had a very lucky escape young man.”
The doctor’s words cover me like a thick duvet; warm and reassuring and I could hug him just like I would, said duvet.
“Thank you Doctor. Will he be allowed home once he has been stitched up?”
“Oh yes. If you can hang on for his prescription for painkillers as well, then we will discharge him. His head will obviously hurt for some time, but otherwise you just need to keep an eye on him and if he is sick again or complains that the pain is increasing, well then bring him straight back.” The Doctor smiles and puts my mind at rest.
“Can I go home with Grandma Rose and Grandad George then Mum please?” Joseph talks as though what he’s been through today is no big deal. I suppose it isn’t to an eleven year old boy, he just bounces back and gets on with it. As for me, well I’ve been to hell and back with worry. I look at Rose and she says that it’s Ok by her and that I am still only a phone call away if Joseph or they need me. I have mixed feelings about the decision, but my boy is growing up and he doesn’t want to be mollycoddled any more. I think it’s the homemade cakes that have swayed it if I am completely honest.
“Ok, but I will call you later to see how you are doing and then again in the morning, no arguments!” I get up to cuddle him whether he likes it or not and kiss him on the part of his head that isn’t hurting.
Having picked up Joseph’s prescription for painkillers I walk out of the hospital with them, on the way however I see Marc standing in the reception area, hands in his suit pockets as per his usual stance, with what can only be described as a look of relief. I mouth to him that I won’t be a moment and he nods to let me know he understood what I was saying. Giving Joseph an extra strong cuddle; jeez this lad is as tall as me and it is frightening to see him growing up so fast. I wave the three of them goodbye and blow him one last kiss. I cross my arms in front of me as I feel a slight tug at my heart as I watch him drive away and that’s when I feel a warm hand at the base of my spine. I was protecting my heart and now I have Marc here protecting me. I turn into him and his arms envelope me as I release the tears of relief and loss that were burning my throat.
Sat in the coffee shop I nurse my cup of coffee and tissue with Marc sitting opposite me; he looks so striking in his dark blue 3-piece suit, white shirt and blue tie. Even after I have soaked tears and goodness knows what else into it.
“You didn’t have to drop everything that you were doing to come over here you know, but I am really glad you did. Thank you.” I look up from my cup.
“Isabel sometimes you need to have someone there for you. I know you are a strong, independent woman, but you cannot carry everything on those shoulders of yours, I want to be here and in any case, I wouldn’t have been able to concentrate on my work at the College thinking about the both of you.” I can tell he is sincere in what he says.
He pauses before going on. “Perhaps now isn’t the time for us to discuss what we were going to.”
I don’t want to put off what he needs to explain. I have to hear it now; it will also take my mind off what has happened and help me to stop worrying so much over Joseph. “No I think it is. Emelie had an ulterior motive for wanting to see me today and I need to hear it from you what on earth she is trying to get at.”
Marc sighs looking down at his coffee cup, “What exactly did Emelie say to you?”
“She asked if you had mentioned or spoke about your family to me and that I shouldn’t take you at face value, first impressions.”
Marc shakes his head before sighing again.
“I suppose she is right to a certain degree, you shouldn’t but that is only for you to judge once I have told you all there is to know. I do hope that you take everything into consideration and that your perception of me doesn’t change the fact I care for you, a lot. What I do suggest is that you drink something stronger than coffee though, as I am not sure caffeine alone will help to prepare you for what I have to say.”
It all sounds very ominous, none the less he deserves to have his say.
Sitting at a corner table in the opulent Michelin starred Midsummer House Restaurant in Cambridge; Marc has ordered a bottle of Pinot Gris from off the menu, along with our food. My mental maths is pretty good, so I am astounded when I calculate that the final bill will not be far off my Teaching Assistant’s weekly wage. Pouring more wine into each of our glasses, I feel as though I should be sitting comfortably ready for a long story to begin; however I am anything but comfortable at this moment.
“My father is an advisor to the Attorney General in America. He is a very proud and private man, who has exceptionally high standards and expectations of everyone around him, whether that is from the colleagues he works with or his own family. I didn’t know what I wanted to do when I left school and went into college with no career ambitions or aspiration, but my father pushed me towards the medical profession as science is what I was strongest in and if I am honest, I think he wanted to see me have letters after my name. Unfortunately for my father, his other son, my step brother didn’t want to be pushed around and went away to do what he wanted to.”
Taking a couple of seconds to pause, Marc sips at his wine. I don’t want to say anything to him as yet, as I do not want to him to lose his train of thought or stop him while he is telling me this.
“My step brother, Christian, made some pretty bad decisions and despite my father’s best efforts; offering money, refuge and education, he got himself involved with the wrong crowd at the wrong time. Two years ago he was involved in an armed robbery which also involved the manslaughter of a store assistant. Christian didn’t pull the trigger, but he was there, part of the gang. This resulted in a sentence of 16 years in prison without parole.”
I instantly reach across the table to hold on to Marc’s hand when I see the pain on his face. His hand grips mine as if doing so will take the edge off what he is saying and I am starting see a different part of Marc. I have seen his; smart, caring, sexual and funny side, but this is the first time I am seeing his emotional side. He looks dejected, not for himself, but for his father.
“I am sure you can imagine how that affected my family. Not only were they distressed by what happened, they were also let down and ashamed of Christian. In the end though, blood is blood and my father did everything he could to help him, which included pulling many strings to help keep the crime out of the press. My step brother has the same surname as his mother, so that made things a little easier and so far we have managed to avoid it being leaked. If it was ever to become public knowledge, my father would not only have to give up his position within the Government, it would also break him.”
I finally feel that the time is right for me to say something about all of this.
“Oh Marc, I am so sorry about all of what you and your family have been through, but I don’t understand what this has to do with Emelie.” Marc looks out of the window and my heart goes out to him. Eventually he turns back to me and I feel him stroke his thumb across the back of my hand.
“Emelie has somehow found out about Christian and is using this information to blackmail me.”
Blackmail! I have only ever read about this in the newspapers or books. Blackmail! I do my best to keep the shock from showing on my face.
“If I am thinking correctly, why would she want to blackmail you? Surely you have to have something damning against a person to want to do that, to want to bring them down. What does she have on you?”
“My medical knowledge and strict vow to do any research ethically.” Ok, I have to briefly let go of Marc’s hand so I can rub my temples and eyes.
“So what are you saying Marc?”
“I found out a month ago that Emelie and her husband, Stefano haven’t been working along side the same code of conduct and practice as me or other researchers. I have known the both of them for some years and in fact we have become close friends, until I found out what I have. They have been researching on a similar line as me, trying to find the best cures and vaccinations. It can be a big money business if you find one, with pharmaceutical companies fighting over who is going to discover the next big thing, a molecule that would create a revolution in the medical world, such as Viagra did a few years back and eventually distribute it around the world as soon as the clinical trials are under way. It shouldn’t be that way but regrettably when people either become desperate or money hungry, it does.” Marc drops his head obviously distressed by what Emelie and Stefano have been doing.
I take a hold of his hands again with both of mine.
“In any business there are people that cut corners to either speed up a process or to make more money or both. This is a risk that cannot be taken in anything that’s medical, especially when it’s other people’s lives that are at risk.” Marc tone turns to anger and I can see how passionate he is about his job and beliefs.
“Before a medicine can be put out there it has to be vigorously tested on closely monitored research subjects. That’s what clinical trials are for. Infecting people in the name of research would never be allowed by an ethics committee. We can do that on animals during laboratory protocols, but even that has to be approved by ethics. However, infecting humans would never be allowed unless it’s for an essay on vaccines. Vaccines are produced either by attenuating a whole virus enough, so it becomes harmless for the subject or by using only a portion of the pathogen to trigger an immune response against it. So, the next time the immune system comes in contact with the same virus, it will recognize it and will be able to produce antibodies against it immediately, therefore stopping the infection before it spreads and the subject becomes ill. In an essay on vaccines, we give a certain dose to the research subject and then test the level of antibody production by running tests on his blood after definite periods of time. What Emelie and her husband did is that they injected a virus into people who have signed confidentiality agreements and are being paid compensation or danger money I suppose you could call it. Once a subject shows signs of the infection, they are then given this newly discovered drug so that Emilie and Stefano can then gather the results into how or if it works. Unfortunately the test subjects they are recruiting for this experiment are mainly people from third world countries who for one; cannot read so the ‘confidentiality agreement’ they sign is probably loaded with other small print they don’t know about or understand and secondly; the money that is being paid to them may not be a lot by our standards, but to them it could be up to a years earnings! The laws in these countries can sometimes be non-existent and therefore companies like this one will not be bothered by the authorities and if so they are willing to pay a significant amount of money to make things go their way.”
An Acute Attraction Page 8