by Adele Abbott
“But I have orders to fulfil.”
“What orders?”
“I’ve been in touch with several of the country’s leading knitwear outlets, and I’ve taken a number of orders. We’re talking thousands of pounds here.”
“Really? Thousands?”
“Tens of thousands, actually.”
Luther Stone had said I needed to increase my turnover. Maybe, this was one way I could do it?
“If I allow you to keep the machines here until you’ve fulfilled your current orders, I’m going to need some kind of payment.”
“For what?”
“Office space. You’ll have to pay rent for using my office.”
“I don’t have any cash on hand. It’s all tied up in the business.”
“That’s okay. I’m a reasonable person. How about we split the profits when the money comes in?”
“Okay. I’ll give you ten per cent?”
“Fifty.”
“Not a chance. Twenty, and that’s my best offer.”
“Done!”
Who said I wasn’t a savvy businesswoman?
Chapter 5
I had a craving for a blueberry muffin.
I know—who’d have thought it?
I magicked myself over to Cuppy C where the twins were behind the counter in the tea room. I could tell, as soon as I walked through the door, that they were very upbeat about something.
“Morning, Jill,” Amber called.
“Hi, Jill. Blueberry muffin?” Pearl reached for a plate.
“I wasn’t going to bother with a muffin today.” I lied. “But, if you’re twisting my arm. And a cup of tea, please.”
“Grab a seat over there.” Amber pointed to the window. “We’ll come and join you.”
Pearl asked one of the assistants to come through from the cake shop, and the twins came to join me at the window table.
“I’m almost afraid to ask why you two are so upbeat.” I took a bite of the muffin. As always, it was delicious.
“We’ve come up with the best ever moneymaking scheme.” Pearl beamed.
I shook my head in disbelief.
“What’s wrong?” she said.
“Don’t you remember what you both said after the Baking Reimagined debacle? You said that from now on you would focus on selling the best possible cakes, and not get caught up in any more crazy moneymaking schemes.”
“Yeah, but this is totally different.” Amber sounded indignant.
“Different how?”
“It’s all about passive income, Jill.”
They both nodded enthusiastically.
“Passive income? What does that mean exactly?”
“It means being able to earn money without having to do any work,” Pearl said.
“Does it involve pyramids, by any chance?”
“Pyramids?” Amber looked confused.
“She means pyramid schemes,” Pearl said. “And no, it isn’t a pyramid scheme. It’s a legitimate way of making more money without doing any extra work.”
“Okay. Spill the beans then. Tell me about this brilliant scheme of yours.”
“When the Adrenaline Boys moved out,” Amber began.
“Hold on. The Adrenaline Boys have moved out? When did that happen?”
“They got all huffy, and told us we could stuff our rooms.”
“Why? What did you do to upset them?”
“Nothing really.” Pearl shrugged. “We just mentioned their smelly socks.”
I laughed. “That wasn’t exactly the most diplomatic thing to do, was it?”
“We had to say something. It was terrible.”
“Anyway, you were telling me about this brilliant business idea of yours.”
“After the Adrenaline Boys had left, we came to the conclusion that having tenants living up there is more trouble than it’s worth,” Amber said. “So instead, we’re going to rent the rooms for use as a beauty salon.”
“Well, girls, I have to admit that’s actually not a bad idea.”
“See, Jill, we do have good ideas sometimes.” Amber looked very pleased with herself. “We’ve already advertised, so hopefully it won’t be long before we get someone in.”
“By the way, Jill,” Pearl said. “Did you know that Laura and Flora are now working in Best Cakes?”
“I didn’t, but I can’t say I’m surprised. I figured that the ice maidens were in cahoots with him somehow.”
“Miles has been very quiet recently,” Amber said. “Unnervingly quiet. I think he must be planning something.”
The shop suddenly got a lot busier, so the twins were forced to go back behind the counter. I was still thinking about what they’d said about the beauty salon, and had to admit that it was actually quite a good idea. Not only would it give them passive income, but it would also bring people into the shop who might not otherwise have visited Cuppy C. Customers of the beauty salon might stop off, on their way in or out, to partake of refreshments. That way, not only would the twins benefit from the rental income, but they would also see an upturn in trade.
“Are you the cousins of Jill Gooder?” A woman, wearing a shiny blue raincoat, was standing at the counter.
“Yes,” Pearl said. “That’s Jill over there, sitting by the window.”
The woman turned around, smiled at me, and made her way over.
“Hello there. I’m sorry to disturb you. My name is Susan Bestwick. You saved my son’s life.”
Tommy Bestwick was the young boy who’d been taken by the pouchfeeder. Fortunately, I’d managed to rescue the boy before the creature had taken him back to its nest. Tommy had escaped without any obvious injuries.
“How is he?”
“He’s fine, thanks to you. I was worried that the incident might have had some after-effects, but the only thing he ever talks about is the awful smell in the pouch. I can’t help thinking about what might have happened if you hadn’t been visiting on that day. If that horrible creature had made it through the wall, with Tommy in its pouch—” She took a deep breath. “It doesn’t even bear thinking about.”
“I’m glad Tommy is okay.”
“Look, I’m a sculptor by trade. I wondered if you’d allow me to make a sculpture of you? By way of a thank you?”
“A sculpture of me?” That did sound like a rather grand idea. “Okay. Why not?”
“Great. I’ll get in touch with you to arrange a date for a sitting, if that’s okay?”
“That’s fine. Thank you very much.”
If Jack could have his bowling trophy on display, I didn’t see why I shouldn’t have a sculpture of myself on the mantelpiece.
Long after Susan Bestwick had left, I was still daydreaming about the sculpture. The more I thought about it, the more I liked the idea.
“Jill.” A woman’s voice snapped me back to earth. It was Hilary from Love Spell. “Is it okay to join you?”
“Of course, but I’ll have to be leaving in a few minutes.”
“Not to worry. I have a meeting at our Candlefield office shortly.”
“How is Love Spell doing?”
“We’re incredibly busy. It’s got to the point where we’re struggling to find enough human men to match with all the witches on our books. If you know any eligible male humans, please do send them our way.”
“Okay. I’ll keep that in mind.”
“By the way, Jill. I think I owe you a big thank you.”
“What for?”
“A little bird told me you had words with Gordon Armitage.”
“I hope you don’t mind me sticking my nose in.”
“Not at all. I’m delighted that you did. Ever since then, we haven’t had a peep out of him.”
“I’m pleased to hear that, but very surprised. He never used to take any notice of me when we shared a building.”
“Well, whatever you did, it seems to have done the trick. Thanks again.”
“Anytime. Have you by any chance heard of a dating agency called Love Bites?�
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“Of course. It’s more or less run on the same lines as our own agency, except that Love Bites matches female vampires with male humans.”
“I had no idea there was such an agency.”
“It isn’t only witches who want to find partners in the human world. All the other sups do too. Ours is probably the biggest agency, but Love Bites isn’t far behind.”
“Do you know the people who run it?”
“Not really.”
“Do vampire/human matches work?”
“I’ve heard on the grapevine that there have been some problems.”
“What kind of problems?”
“It’s the age-old story with vampires. When they get close to humans, they can sometimes get the urge.”
“To drink their blood?”
“Yeah. Vampires in Candlefield drink only synthetic blood. When they come to the human world, and are exposed to human blood, some of them can’t resist having a taste. And some go much further.”
“What do you mean by further?”
“It’s not uncommon for a vampire to kill a human for their blood. Not exactly the basis for a good relationship.”
“No kidding.”
Poor old Luther had no idea what he’d let himself in for. Maybe I should warn him? But how was I supposed to do that?
Hey, Luther. You know that new girlfriend of yours? You’d better be careful around her because she’s a blood-sucking vampire.
Yeah, that would work. Not.
***
I didn’t bother going back to the office. There didn’t seem to be much point because of all the noise and disruption that Winky and his garment production line were causing. Still, he had promised it would only be for a couple of days, and then I stood to make twenty per cent on the deal, so it would be worth it.
Instead, I opted for an early finish because we were going to see The Brill Sylvester that night. And before that, I had a ton of washing to catch up on. I’d considered trying to persuade Mrs Mopp to do the washing for us, but having seen her reaction to Jack’s request to do his ironing, I’d thought better of it.
I wanted to take a closer look at the necklace that Mrs V had found in the linen basket. As I took it out of the little black box, the necklace slipped out of my hand, and fell onto the kitchen floor. The chain broke, and the pendant slid across the tiles, and underneath the cupboard.
Great!
I got down on hands and knees, and reached under the cupboard, but the gap was too narrow. I could see the pendant, which had slid right to the back—near to the wall, but there was no chance of my reaching it. Luckily for me, though, I had my magic to fall back on.
I shrank myself so I was small enough to stand up in the gap under the cupboard. I’d no idea that it was so dusty under there. I sneezed, and then sneezed again. I had to hold my hand over my mouth and nose to try to stop breathing in all the dust. I’d been attacked by spiders before, and it wasn’t fun, so I kept an eye open for any creepy crawlies that might view me as their next meal.
I reached the pendant without incident, and managed to drag it out from under the cupboard. I was exhausted, and still trying to catch my breath, when it happened.
The kitchen door opened.
It was Jack with another man who I didn’t recognise. It was probably his work colleague who had said he wanted to see Jack’s bowling trophy. Any moment now, they would see mini-me. I had to act quickly, so I made myself invisible, and hurried across the kitchen floor. When Jack and his friend were clear of the door, I made a dash for it. Once I was in the hall, I reversed the ‘invisible’ and ‘shrink’ spells, and then walked back into the kitchen.
“Jack?” I said. “I didn’t realise you were home.”
“Hi.” Jack gave me a puzzled look. “This is Trevor, Jill.”
“Nice to meet you, Trevor. Have you come to see Jack’s trophy?”
“Yes.” Trevor was also giving me a strange look.
“Help yourself to a beer, Trevor.” Jack pointed to the fridge, then grabbed me by the arm, and led me back out to the hall, closing the door behind him. “What on earth have you been doing, Jill?”
“What do you mean?”
“Look at yourself. You’re covered in dust.”
I glanced down for the first time since I’d reversed the spells. He was right. I was white from all the dust underneath the cupboard.
“Err—I—err—was up in the loft.”
“What were you looking for up there?”
“Nothing really. I just thought I’d have a look around.”
Jack gave me that look of his. The one that says: Why am I living with this lunatic?
“And what’s this?” He held out the pendant.
“It’s mine. I dropped it earlier when the chain broke. Where did you find it?”
“In the kitchen, just now. It was on the floor.”
“Thanks.” I took it from him.
“Why do you have a pendant with the initials ‘JB’?”
“I’ve had it ages. They made a mistake when they engraved it. When I said ‘G’ they thought I’d said ‘B’.”
“Why didn’t you get them to swap it?”
“It was the only one of its kind they had, so I said I’d keep it anyway.”
“Just in case you married someone with a surname that began with a ‘B’?”
Chapter 6
It isn’t like me to complain.
What do you mean, I must be joking?
As I was saying, it isn’t like me to complain, but I felt justified in this case. Jack had invited his new buddy over on the same day as we were going to see the Fabulous Sylvester. Now, I know it takes a man less than five nanoseconds to get ready, but I need a lot longer.
“Had you forgotten we were going out tonight?” I said, after Trevor had left.
“No, why?”
“I don’t have any time to get ready.”
“There’s plenty of time; we don’t need to leave for an hour. I’m really looking forward to the show.”
“Me too. Magic tricks? Can’t get enough of them.”
“The Great Sylvester does much more than mere magic tricks. Haven’t you ever seen any of his stuff? He’s made an elephant disappear, and a boat.”
That confirmed that he must be an illusionist. I could think of no spell that would be able to accomplish that.
“If he’s so good, why is he appearing at a fleapit like the Washbridge Arena?”
“He isn’t. The show is at Parkside Arena. Didn’t you realise?”
“I just assumed it would be in Washbridge. If we’ve got to get to Parkside, I’ve got even less time than I thought. Get out of the bedroom—let me get ready.”
Somehow, we made it to the Parkside Arena with time to spare, which was just as well because the queue for the overpriced car park was ridiculously long.
“Ten pounds to park?” I said, as we made our way to our seats.
“Programme?” A young woman in a cute blue uniform held out the glossy publications.
“No, thanks.” I waved her away.
“I’ll take one.” Jack took out a five-pound note.
“They’re ten pounds.” The young woman smiled.
“Of course.” Jack handed over the rest of the cash.
“We’ll need binoculars to see from here,” I said, as I sat on the world’s most uncomfortable seat. “We’re a million miles from the stage.”
“I thought you weren’t interested in the show, anyway.”
“I want to see it now that I’m here.”
“That’s what those large screens at the side of the stage are for.”
“So, we drove thirty miles, and spent eighty pounds on tickets, just to watch it on TV?”
“Jill!”
“What?”
“Stop moaning.”
“I’m not moaning. I’m just commenting.”
“Stop commenting, then. If you give it a chance, you might actually enjoy the show.”
And, amazingly, I did.
What? I’m not too proud to admit when I’m wrong. After all, it happens so rarely.
The Marvellous Sylvester performed a number of ‘tricks’, each one a little more impressive than the previous one. He chopped off his assistant’s head with a guillotine, only for her to reappear ‘whole’ again moments later. I couldn’t work out how he’d done it—unless of course he employed a lot of twins on short term contracts—very short term. He caught a bullet in his teeth. And then he escaped from a water-filled tank. I’d seen those same tricks, or some variation of them, many times before. It was impossible to be sure from such a distance, but I didn’t think he was a wizard—just a talented human magician.
Then came the interval, after which we were to witness ‘an illusion the likes of which we had never seen before’. At least, that’s what the MC announced after the lights came up in the arena.
“So?” Jack turned to me. “What do you think of it so far?”
“It’s okay.”
“You’ve been enthralled.”
“Enthralled? Have you been eating dictionaries again?”
“You never took your eyes off the stage.”
“Okay, I admit it’s better than I expected.”
“And the best is yet to come.”
“Is that what it says in your overpriced programme?”
“Do you want anything to eat or drink?”
“Not if that smell is anything to go by. What is it, anyway?” There’d been a sickly-sweet smell hovering over the arena ever since we’d taken our seats.
“Candy floss, probably. Are you sure you wouldn’t like a hot dog or something?”
“Okay, then. Get me a coke and a burger. And try not to max out your credit card.”
The bread was rock hard, and the burger so small it was barely visible on the bread cob. But for nine pounds, what else would you expect? Sheesh!
“Ladies and gentlemen!” The MC was centre-stage. “We now come to the finale. Hold on to your hats, and prepare to be blown away.”
During the interval, a screen had been lowered to hide the back section of the stage. When this was raised, it revealed a huge articulated lorry. People all around me became excited, as they realised that the Incredible Sylvester was about to make this monster truck disappear.