Tanner sipped his iced tea. "You didn't think about canceling? Not even for a moment?"
"Not even for a moment. I'm a doctor, remember? I've been educated in addiction."
"So have I. The hard way." Tanner laughed and she relaxed. He was obviously comfortable with the topic and with himself. She admired the easy way he carried his burden. He wasn't screaming about being a victim or how life was unfair. He'd faced his problem head on and dealt with it.
She flipped open the menu. "What do you recommend here?"
"I usually get the chicken parmesan but if you want something lighter they make an excellent grilled salmon."
"I think I'll splurge tonight."
His gaze ran up and down her body making her shiver with awareness. "You're a beautiful woman, Maddie, with a perfect figure. You should eat anything you like."
Heat rushed to her cheeks. "Thank you, but I'm also a doctor. Too much of anything isn't good for you. Moderation is the key." She took a deep breath. "Hearing that you have a flaw helped."
"I've got several. Don't we all?"
Madison shrugged. "I certainly do. I guess I don't think of you that way. I think of you as a sort of...well, hero."
Tanner jerked back in his chair. "A hero? I'm no hero, Maddie."
"You are." Maddie nodded. "When I was thirteen there were some girls teasing me during the town carnival. You told them to stop or you'd call their parents. Those girls never bothered me again."
Tanner shook his head, his brow furrowed. "I wish I remembered that day, honey. But I don't."
It seemed unreal that a day that had lived in her memory for almost seventeen years was completely forgotten by him. Maybe she'd dreamed it or blew it out of proportion after all this time.
No, it had happened. She was sure of it.
"I was grateful all the same."
"What were they teasing you about?" he asked.
"The usual. My hair, my freckles, my glasses, my braces, my brains, and don't forget my clothes. That was the list most of the time."
He seemed at a loss for words. "That was a long time ago. I'm sorry I don't—"
She held up her hand. "It's okay. You don't need to apologize. Just because it was important to me, doesn't mean it was important to you. You were just being nice, that's all."
"I wish I remembered," he said, grabbing her hand and giving it a squeeze. "I wish I really was the hero you thought I was. I'm just a man, Maddie. Flesh and blood."
He certainly was. Very attractive and very male flesh and blood. The lustful thoughts made her shift in her seat and what wasn't already pink with embarrassment turned bright red. He quirked an eyebrow.
"Something I said?"
The waiter sidled up to the table before she could answer. They ordered and the waiter dissolved away, leaving her with the open question waiting for an answer.
"I—I'm not very comfortable on dates. I told you I never know what to say or do."
"How about you tell me about medical school? That might put you at ease."
"I'm supposed to let you talk about yourself." Madison chewed her bottom lip.
"You are?" Tanner frowned. "Why?"
Madison sighed. "Sherry gave me dating advice. I'm supposed to let you talk about yourself. She said men love to talk about themselves. I'm also not to talk about gross, bloody things, Star Trek, Star Wars, Dr. Who, or have sex with you." She buried her face in her hands. "Oh God, I shouldn't have said that."
She peeked through her fingers and he was grinning. He reached across the table and tugged her hands away. "You can talk about all the blood and guts you want. I can handle it. I love Star Wars, by the way. I've never seen Dr. Who but I'd like to hear about it." His expression gentled. "As for sex, well, I'm very attracted to you, Maddie. You've probably figured that out. But I don't want to rush you. When the time is right, we'll know."
Her heart accelerated at his tender tone. She was relieved and disappointed all at once. He excited her and she couldn't remember the last time she'd been this sexually attracted to a man. But he was right. She wasn't ready to make love with him tonight.
"You're a nice man."
Tanner groaned. "Don't say that. Next thing you'll be telling me that I'm a great guy but you just don't feel that way about me."
She fiddled with her napkin. "I doubt that will happen."
He smiled. "It won't happen for me either. Now tell me about medical school, pretty Maddie. I promise I won't say a word to Sherry about it."
She shook her head. "I'm still too nervous. How about you tell me something about yourself instead? How about you tell me about you?"
An hour, two chicken parmesan meals, and a shared tiramisu later and she'd learned quite a bit about Tanner. "You didn't like the military?"
The waiter placed two cups of coffee in front of them. Tanner added a dollop of cream and a sugar. "I don't like people telling me what to do. The military was a means to an end."
"Law enforcement."
Tanner snorted. "That was far from my mind. I just wanted a steady paycheck. I hadn't done great in school so my options were limited."
"You got to see the world." She sipped her coffee. "That must have been nice."
"It was." He nodded. "I was stationed in Germany for awhile. I liked it there, but Abby was homesick. She never enjoyed being an Army wife. Or a sheriff's wife either, for that matter."
"Did you leave the Army for Abby?"
"Sort of. She was tired of it, and my dad had talked to Sheriff Tunney about giving me a chance as a deputy. I thought things would change if I came home."
"Did they?"
He frowned. "Yes, but not for the better. I'd promised Abby I would stop drinking. I told her everything would be better when we came back to Springwood. I lied."
"Is that why you divorced?" It was a nosy question and none of her business but it had slipped out before she could censure herself.
"That's a good question." He stroked his chin. "We never were deliriously happy, even in the early days. We married too young and we wanted different things. But Abby actually left me after I got sober. I hadn't had a drink in about six months when she came and said she couldn't take it anymore."
That didn't make much sense. "What couldn't she take anymore? You'd stopped drinking."
"I think she couldn't take being a sheriff's wife anymore. She'd always pictured her life differently." It looked as if he were struggling for the right words. "Easier, more glamorous. I don't know if that's the right way to put it. She hated having to clip coupons and watch every dime when I was in the Army. She wanted something better for herself. I don't blame her. It wasn't easy with two kids and a husband who was at the bar all the time."
"It wasn't any of my business asking you about that." Madison ran her finger around the rim of her coffee cup.
He captured her hand and his eyes were a soft blue. "If we're going to give this a real shot between us I don't want you to think I'm hiding my past. You can ask me anything."
She’d relaxed as the evening had unwound and she felt the same way. "You can ask me anything as well."
He slowly smiled. "Are you sure, Dr. Shay? I want to know everything about you."
"There's not much to know." Madison shrugged. Her life was an open book. A boring one.
"Tell me about growing up? Were you always the smartest kid in school?"
She was working to put her childhood behind her. "I was. And boy, no one ever let me forget it."
Tanner laughed. "Tell me more." He signaled the waiter for more coffee.
"Don't blame me if you fall asleep while hearing this. It's not that interesting."
"Let me be the judge. Why don't you start with how you and Sherry became friends?"
That brought a smile to Madison's face. "That's actually a pretty entertaining story. We were in fourth grade and Sherry was the new kid in school."
They were both laughing by the time he helped her on with her coat and led her to his vehicle. Now all she had to
do was worry about the goodnight kiss.
* * * *
Madison looked nervous. Extremely nervous. She was biting her lip, bouncing one leg over the other, and avoiding eye contact. Tanner had to hide his grin as he opened the SUV door and helped her out. He knew why she was so tense.
It was time to get his goodnight kiss.
If he were honest, he'd been thinking about it all night. The way her full lips had moved as she told him about her childhood and then college. Her perfume had wafted around him, leaving him hard and aching. There would be no relief tonight. He'd go home to no one but Scout and take a cold shower before falling into bed. If he were lucky, he wouldn't wake up with dog breath in his face.
He held her hand as they walked to the door. She fumbled with her purse and pulled out her key ring before looking up at him. Her mouth was shiny with some kind of gloss and he couldn't wait to kiss it off, licking it with his tongue. Her eyes were wide and she had a deer in the headlights expression.
"Um, would you like to come in for some coffee?"
It was sweet to invite him in, but if he accepted he'd want to take things further than a kiss. He was pretty sure her father was home and Tanner hadn't been caught necking with a girl on the couch since high school. Besides, they'd had three cups of coffee at the restaurant. He wouldn't sleep all night as it was.
He shook his head. "I don't want to wake up your dad. How about a movie on Wednesday night? There are a couple of good ones showing at the mall in the city."
"That's sounds good. I haven't seen a movie in a long time."
The air was thick with tension and Tanner didn't know how to make it better. There seemed only one solution. He ran his hand from her shoulders down her arms and then pulled her close to his own body. Bending his head, he captured her soft lips with his. At first he thought he'd misread her signals, but then her mouth parted under his and his tongue delved into the warm cavern.
She tasted of chocolate and coffee and something unique and indescribable. He angled his head so he could deepen the kiss and her arms crept around his neck, pulling him down. His groin tightened painfully and only the layers of winter wear kept him from pressing her curves as close as he could get her.
At some point, they'd moved and she was leaning back against the house, her fingers tangled in his hair. He lifted his head and looked down at her drowsy, well-kissed expression. Her lids were half-closed, her cheeks flushed, whether from the cold air or the heat of their kiss, he wasn't sure.
"That was a hell of a kiss, honey." His voice was hoarse and he didn't bother to hide his reaction to her innocent seduction. She licked her lips and he had to stifle a groan.
"It certainly was. I'm not sure I've ever been kissed quite like that."
He brushed her cheek with his fingers, knowing exactly what she was talking about. Something major had happened here on this front porch and it was more than just the meeting of their mouths. In fact, the entire evening had been leading up to this. He'd been lonely for so long, had gotten used to the feeling. In one night, Madison Shay had knocked him off his comfortable path and made him remember what it was like to feel.
"I haven't either." He pressed a quick kiss to her lips. If he didn't leave now, he would start thinking of all the reasons he should stay. "I'll call you, okay? About Wednesday?"
She nodded and he stepped back, instantly missing the feel of her body. He lifted the keys from her fingers and unlocked the door. "I'll wait until you’re inside and I hear the lock."
She didn't say anything for a moment. "Thank you for dinner."
He pushed a stray hair back from her face, her skin like satin under his fingers. He felt her tremble under his touch. He was in big fucking trouble with this woman, and surprisingly he didn't mind. He was scared as hell.
"Thank you for coming. Go on inside. It's cold out here."
Tanner stood there while she entered the house, the door closing behind her. He exhaled slowly as he listened for the fall of the deadbolt, then turned to head back to the SUV. He swung into the driver's seat and quickly checked his phone. He'd had it on silent during the date and grimaced when he saw six messages from Seth.
He punched a few buttons until he had Seth on the line. "Seth Reilly."
"Sorry, I just got your message. What's up?" Tanner asked.
"Shit, man. I was worried about you. I've got a murder in Harper. Jared and Logan are here, too."
"Jared and Logan? Why are they there?"
Seth sighed. "Because we're not sure if it's drug related or the vigilante. Can you come here and look at the crime scene? See if it matches your drug murders? Logan and Jared are here as they've seen the most action from the vigilante."
Tanner started up the engine. "I'm on my way. Give me directions."
Seth rattled off the location and Tanner turned on the siren and lights. So much for a hot romantic evening. This night was going to end in a stone-cold murder.
* * * *
Tanner pulled up to the old barn as close as he could get to the yellow tape surrounding the scene. There were various law enforcement vehicles scattered around and one helicopter. Looked like Jared had called in his DEA friend, Jason Anderson. Tanner showed his badge to the deputy on watch and ducked under the tape, striding to where Seth, Jason, Jared, and Logan stood.
Even from this distance, with nothing but lights brought in by the cops, Tanner could make out the bloody scene. He turned on his flashlight and shined it down on the body.
"Have you decided anything or were you waiting for me?" he asked.
Logan slapped him on the back. "It's just not a party unless you're here, man."
Tanner walked around the body looking for similarities and differences to his own crime scenes. "I could have passed on this party tonight. I had a date."
He knew he'd be setting off a shit storm by telling them, but Logan was always on his case about finding a woman. Shit, Logan didn't want to be tied down but he sure as fuck liked to see other guys with one woman. Maybe it simply cleared the field for him.
Seth chuckled. "A date, huh? Wait until I tell Presley. She'll want to double date."
Tanner shook his head. "No way. Presley is walking, talking trouble. I don't need any more stress in my life." He grinned at his friend. "No offense. I'm not sure I could handle all the excitement."
Seth laughed. "None taken. I handle it just fine. Wouldn't have it any other way, honestly."
Jared groaned. "Can we stop with the woman chatter? Tanner, what are you thinking?"
Tanner looked up at Jason who had yet to speak. "Sorry to see you again under these circumstances. But in this case, I think the DEA isn't involved. This looks like the vigilante to me, not like the drug related murders I've been seeing. There's no torture here, just a clean kill. What made you think it was drug related?"
"The deceased was a known drug mule," Jason replied. "Same cartel that's been trying to take over the drug route through this area."
Tanner snapped off his flashlight. "I've never seen this guy. How did the vigilante find out about him, I wonder?"
Jared crossed his arms over his chest. "I arrested him about six months ago for possession with intent to deliver."
Seth shook his head. "And I arrested him last week for using his girlfriend as a punching bag."
"Charming guy," Jared observed. "The vigilante does have a way of choosing his victims."
Jason's pocket buzzed and he pulled out his cell, looked at the screen, and then sighed. "Shit. I need to get out of here. We've got a big bust going down at the border." He tucked his phone away. "I'll leave the crime scene guys here as a favor from your friendly federal government. Unfortunately, I can't help much with a vigilante murderer. I could call in a profiler if you like."
Jared looked around. "I don't know about you guys but I think we should take him up on his offer. A profiler couldn't hurt."
The men nodded in agreement. "Then I'll talk to my friend at the FBI. He'll tell me the name of the best. I'll ca
ll you." Jason turned on his heel and was gone. The coroner nudged the men aside so he could begin gathering evidence.
"Are you still happy about the vigilante, Logan?" Seth asked.
Logan scowled. "I've never been happy about it. I just haven't obsessed about it like you all have. But yes, I think it has gone too far. I'm tired of getting dragged out of a warm bed to come to a murder scene."
Jared waggled his eyebrows. "Just how warm was the bed you left? Scorching?"
"Warm enough." Logan snorted. "Give Seth the hard time. He's the happily married man just back from his honeymoon."
Seth had a grin a mile wide. "No comment. Tanner's the one with a date tonight."
Three sets of eyes swung his way and Tanner just shook his head. "A gentleman never talks. Madison is a lady. A real lady."
Jared laughed. "He's got it bad. Next thing you know there will be a wedding. Damn, I hope this love shit isn't catching."
Tanner shoved at Jared shoulder. "Shut the hell up. It was just a date."
But Tanner knew it had been much more. He wasn't ready to call it love, but he was ready to admit to the deep connection he felt when he was with Madison. The only question in his mind was if he was worthy of it. He'd messed up so many things, he sure as fuck didn't want to mess this up with her. She was too special.
Chapter Nine
Reed Mitchell was standing on the steps of the library Monday night when Tanner finished his AA meeting. To Tanner's complete and utter surprise, Chris had actually shown up. He'd refused to sit next to Tanner but he could see the shock on Chris's face as he took in the identities of the other attendees. Tanner was sure Chris hadn't known that most, if any, of those people were battling alcoholism.
Chris had sat in the back, slumped down in the chair, with his hat pulled down as if it would keep him anonymous. He needn't have worried. No one in that room would ever speak about anyone else. Tanner had tried to talk to Chris when the meeting ended but he'd bolted from the room and out of the library so quickly he'd practically left marks in the tile.
Tanner was just happy Chris had shown up. It was progress.
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