She found her rhythm, the one we discovered for her the few times we were together. I closed my eyes a minute because she always has me ready to blow.
Leaning forward, her nails dug into the flesh of my chest and her pants became shorter. “I’m cumming again,” she warned.
I made her lie over my body, chest to chest and secured her with my arms. “Better hurry, Love,” I said against her lips. Then I did to her what I wanted. I rammed her hard and quick, burying myself to the hilt, withdrawing then spearing her again, until she started to shake. I felt the lightning in my dick that opened the floodgate of an orgasm. It rolled over me in shifts. She stayed connected to me with her head on my chest and I stroked her sides.
We just made love thousands of feet above the ground and my heart is ever higher. I cupped the back of her head and held her to me. Her body was trembling like every muscle was sore. I reached for my shirt and helped her into it.
When I stood up she felt for the edges of the bed before sitting up at the end. I brought her a bottle of water and opened it for her. Her hands shook a little so I bent to kiss her head and calm her. We’ve entwined many times but ‘reuniting sex’ is vigorous and hard.
When she was done I warmed a washcloth in heated water, wrung it out and knelt between her legs. When I parted them she gasped. “Easy,” I smiled. “I’ll give you a minute at least.”
She grinned and relaxed.
I dragged the cloth up the inside of her leg and all the way up to press over the swollen lips of her pussy. Our scents were blended on her. I wiped her clean and bent my head to press a kiss to her upper thigh. She stroked my cheek and dug her fingers into my hair.
“Sleep, now,” I whispered.
She nodded and curled on the bed. Getting in beside her I realized I might have spent her enough to keep the fear of the plane away
However, I can’t sleep when she’s close like this. Spooning is dangerous for me. I pulled the hem of the shirt up her hips and reached around to unbutton the top. Within seconds I was inside her again and she woke to meet my passion like always.
Then we fell asleep. Together.
BRIANNA
Before I even turned over I knew he was gone. I felt it in my bones. Gabriel doesn’t stay.
I took a slow breath and nestled my head into the pillow. Yeah. I can tell by the lightness of the mattress that I’m alone. I put my hand out and met nothing but bedding then wall. Moving further up I met the cold glass of the oval-shaped window.
I took my hand back and closed my eyes. I fucked up royally. I’d avoided sex for this very reason. I rolled to my back and raked my hands through my hair.
Whatever. I knew better.
I felt something weird on my toes and drew my leg back under the sheets. I frowned and sighed but then I sucked in air so fast I choked on it when a pair of lips ascended onto my sex.
What?
No way…
“Gabe?” I asked unevenly.
“Morning, Love,” his gruff morning voice vibrated against my folds. I tossed my head back when he took it to that level. Good God, this man is evil. After getting me off he moved up my body and came out from under the sheets.
I kissed him and tasted myself on his tongue, “You’re here.” I asked more than stated.
“I told you I would stay,” he reminded.
“Is it morning?”
“A little after six-thirty. We’ll be home soon. We flew over Georgia while you slept. ”
“And you’re in bed with me still?”
“Shhh,” he kissed me until it turned hot.
When we made it past the bunny phase he held me for a time but there was a timer on it. I felt it on my skin. Once again my inability to see makes me sensitive to the shift in mood.
He got up.
It was all perfect, except in the way he seemed after the after. He got up without a word. I could hear him getting dressed. No banter, no flirts.
“Are you okay?” I asked sitting up.
He didn’t answer right away. “Yes.”
I’m already uneasy. “What’s on your mind?”
He sounded like he was securing his belt. “I have… to go to London tonight. I’m dreading it.”
Ah, there it is then. I nodded. “Right…” I hugged my knees, “Can you set my clothes on the bed? It would take me forever to find them.”
“I had Danny pack you an overnight bag,” he told me, “It has jeans, t-shirt, and such…” I could feel him setting it next to me.
“Thanks…” I sat at the edge of the bed, “My stick…”
He handed me that too and I stood up but wavered. He held my arms to keep me steady but I swiped him off, “I got it.” I snapped. “I’m sure you don’t usually dote over your one night stands.”
“The London trip has nothing to do with what happen last night.”
I shouldered the little duffle.
He kept on, “I just got the email. It’s just bad timing.”
“Sure, and I can see colors.”
“I can’t help the timing. My father wants me there. It’s-.”
“You tell him no, all the time now. You want to go. You couldn’t run from me on the plane so you’ll run when we land.”
“Don’t assume the worst of me all the fucking time. I stayed, we woke up together. What more do you want from me? What more is there?”
“I see you, Gabe!” I screamed it. “Now, tell the fucking truth-!”
He went silent then, “Maybe I’m not lying- did you think of that? Maybe I’m still trying? Or maybe I’m everything we both know me to be; I’m a dog and I’m done with you, is that what you wanted to hear? There’s no reason to go to London but I’m going because I can’t…stay here. Is that what you want me to tell you? Is the truth so fucking great?”
I stood there working this out in my mind. Who’s fault was this? Do I really have a right to be upset? I know what he is… but then I realized why I allowed myself to think otherwise.
“You said,” I began, “Last night that you wanted me to trust you. You wanted us to trust each other. I’ve had my guard up about you for two years. I don’t care about your flings when you’re away or your flirts with me when you’re home because I was good with things the way they were. You just ruined that, you just took me up here and fucked all of that up for us. Why?”
He sat on the bed. He sounded like he was leaned forward, “Because I always want you. You think I joke when I say you’ve ruined me but I’m not joking. I do seek out redheads, I do watch you move, at home and at work. I see you with our daughter and all I want is that. It’s burned in my mind all day, no matter where I am. You with her. I want you both. For some reason, I have what it takes to be what Willow needs but for you I constantly fall short.”
“But why?” I couldn’t help but ask. “I didn’t stop you last night. I didn’t do anything other than give myself to you. If that’s what you want then why the hell are you leaving? What did I do? Was it me? Is it-?”
“God, no.” He took a breath and my hand, “You did nothing wrong. It’s literally in my blood not to trust you.” He sounded regretful. “All I see when you’re asleep beside me in sunlight is my heart in your hands. I see that last bit of myself that I’ll never get back if I…”
I pulled my hand away and wrapped my arms around myself. We stayed in a forced silence that made my chest ache.
“We ruined it.” I said under my breath. “Two years of building a family and a working relationship all lost in one night of-.” I couldn’t even say it. Where was my fucking head? “It won’t work now… we need to…live apart.” I hate the gut wrenching pain in my chest.
He tried pulling the backs of my knees into his arms but I pushed him off and leaned away, “No.” I kept my body leaned the other way.
“So then this is a good example of what I was saying then. I can’t really trust you can I? One disagreement and you’re talking about leaving me, and doing what with Willow? You’ll use her to make me pay for
this, is that right? I won’t let you-.”
I went deadly still, “If I could see you, I would slap you.” I said. “You’re all of what’s wrong with this system children go through. People so selfish they don’t see past their own bullshit. Willow, is a human. Not a pawn. You’ve already proven yourself as a father you fucktard.” I let a tear slip. “Women that hold a child over a man like a weapon aren’t doing it out of love for the child, they do it because they once loved the father, and it’s a way to keep him or punish him. That’s not parenting. I want to separate because it’s time. This just made living together a sure road to drama. Doesn’t change how we would parent. It’s time because last night you confessed to seeing glimpses of me getting dressed, of wanting me in our home. We can’t go back now. I can’t know those things. You think that’s fair to me? To you? Because last night wasn’t fair. You’re making me feel really cheap, Gabe.”
He tried for me again but I left him and went to get dressed. Counting as I went to calm down. My heart is breaking and I’m even fending off anxiety. Until I imagined Willow. This isn’t about us. The longer I was away from him the clearer things became. Shutting him out in anger won’t fix this and Willow will be the one to suffer for it.
When I came back to sit and buckle at the table I heard him come to check my belt then buckle across from me. We sat in total silence again as the plane landed and I felt myself go very cold. I can’t lose him to a fight like this. He’s part of me. He’s my family. Is one night of sex worth losing that?
When we touched down neither of us moved. Then he spoke before I could, “You were right…we should live apart. I shouldn’t have said that about Willow. Making you seem worse was to make myself feel better about not trusting you. I’m sorry. I’m sorry for all of it.”
I nodded again, “So, can we talk like adults? No excuses or…lies? What happened this morning?”
I could feel his leg bounce on the ball of his foot. The floor told on him, “You don’t know how awful it is to love someone and to be equally fucking terrified of that same love. All my head can rationalize is that I’ve given you every bit of power over me possible.”
I held my knees, “You had power over me too. Wasn’t that a good trade?”
“No,” he sighed, “Not when you were reared to be terrified of weakness. Loving you the way I want, is too much responsibility. The same fear you couldn’t shoulder about planes is how this is for me. You hate planes because they’re uncertain, there’s a lack of control, no stopping, no pulling over, the possibility of crashing. How would you like it if with all your fear of planes I asked you to pilot this craft?”
I smiled a little to myself, “I guess you never picked apart the word we use for our team work with Willow.” I moved my head in his direction, “Co-parent…” I reminded.
He sounded lost, “I know.”
“No, listen. Co-parent.”
He took his time, “I don’t understand.”
I unbuckled and used my stick to take me to his side. I sat on the table in front of him and put my hand out until he took it, “If I was flying this plane, I would be a what?” I’ll handle him like Bubble Guppies.
“Captain.”
“Right,” I laced our fingers, “and if I was a captain, I would need a…?”
“Co-Pilot.”
I smiled again, “That’s why they call it co-parent. You’re my co-pilot. We share the load. We keep each other focused. Keep each other navigated. Why? Because we’re carrying precious cargo. It’s our job to keep flying. Together. For our child.”
He set his elbow on the table by my hip and held my hand to his lips, “And relationships…?” he asked.
“It’s the same,” I pushed my fingers through his hair. “One day, you’re going to find this amazing woman, and even with all the fear and all the uncertainty, you’ll want her enough to make her…your co-pilot.”
He pulled me until I landed across his lap like last night, “I want you to be her.” He said near my cheek.
I closed my wet eyes, “But I don’t think I am, Gabe…” I swallowed, “We have all the pieces for it. A home, a daughter, chemistry, but in the end, there’s something missing…isn’t there? I can help you pilot in parenting, but someone else needs to be your…-”
He held me really tight and my eyes stung from the tears. I don’t like this. I don’t like what this means. I held his face and he rested his head against my chest. “I’m in love with you.” He said against my shoulder.
If I’d of seen that coming, I’d of stopped him, “You’re in love with the idea…” I corrected.
He kissed my shoulder and I brushed his cheek. It’s wet. A tear. Gabriel Gilmore shed a tear for me. “And you?” he asked.
I pressed my lips to his forehead, “I’m in love with the idea of you too.”
Chapter Thirty-Three
BRIANNA
Eighteen Months Later
Strange how life works out, I thought, as I zipped the back of Willow’s flower girl dress. I’m about to be the best ‘man’ at my daughter’s father’s wedding.
PLOT TWIST!
Hmm, strange indeed. Then again, I’m the same woman that was a knocked up, blind virgin. Such is life.
“Mommy, I itch.” Willow declared.
I winced, “I know Blueberry, but this is a special dress.”
Chloe rushed around collecting the basket and flowers, “It’s the damn crinoline,” she said to me, “Don’t we have a slip she can wear under it?”
I shook my head, “No, but her bumps from that chicken pox episode aren’t helping either.” I told her.
Jenzy came running in, “I got it, I got it, I got it!” she called out before tripping and righting herself. She knelt next to me and opened an ointment jar that hit my senses right away. “Uncle Moses had the Aloe Vera,” she explained, “That’s why we couldn’t find it.” She smoothed it on Willow’s arms and legs.
Willow made a shivering noise, “That’s better,” my daughter said in her adorable lisp. “It’s cool and tingly like ice.”
I laughed and kissed her shapely lips, “See, no more itchy.”
A baby fussed in the corner and I stood up and felt my way to the crib in the corner of the spacious bedroom. This crib is familiar. We used it for Willow. I reached down and felt for the one-month-old baby Gavin, “Hello,” I sang as I lifted him up in my arms. He’s tiny and I love it. It’s addicting.
“Watch out now,” Jenzy laughed as she stood, “You might get baby fever if you hold him too long.”
I groaned, “Don’t get me started.”
Chloe came to hover and look down at the little one in my arms, “He looks so much like Gabe, it’s crazy.”
I smiled, “Which is a good thing since everyone says Willow took after me.”
Jenzy came to hover too, “Yeah, she’s a mini Bri.” She agreed.
We all doted on baby Gavin until the door opened and Chris stuck his head into the bedroom, “Eh, ten minutes. Where’s the bride?”
Jenzy shushed him, “She’s getting the dress on with her mom, don’t make her nervous.”
A baby fussed and I recognized it as Tommy, Chris, and Jenzy’s one-year-old son. “Mum, mum, mum,” he said.
Jenzy levitated their way and made tons of kissy sounds as she loved up her boy. “He’s such a little mush isn’t he?” she asked the room.
I don’t have to see to know Chris and Jenzy made a perfect baby.
“Yeah,” Chris sounded urgent, “Your mush just made an atomic bomb in his diaper.”
“It’s your turn.” Jenzy argued.
“No, it’s not, because I did it before we left the house. Also as a side note, I specified no spinach and now it looks like the hulk took a shit. I’m not responsible for that.”
“Spinach is healthy for his diet and don’t say shit.” Jenzy fought.
Chloe and I laughed a little as quiet as possible as I swayed Gavin.
Chris sighed, “I don’t mind throw up, hell I do
n’t mind diapers, but you just had to use non-disposable. That’s the deal. You do it when he’s wearing the loin cloths; I do it when he’s in synthetic throw always.”
“Dick.” She quipped.
“Honey,” he said in an outrage, “Don’t say dick, around the baby.” He mocked.
I heard a slap and laughed knowing she got him. She took the baby and followed him out.
Chloe and I laughed a good while then sat on the bed where Willow could cuddle up with me and touch her baby brother. She adores him and I do too.
A few minutes later the door to the master bathroom opened and Gabriel’s fiancée Molly came out. By the sound of Chloe’s gasp, the dress was as gorgeous as planned.
“Okay…” Molly said in a wobble. “Is it good?” Molly sounded like she was about to pass out. “Brianna? I know you can’t see it but-.”
I stood up and walked the baby over. I put my hand out and she took it, “I know with every fiber that you look amazing.” I bounced Gavin, “What do you think?” I asked the little peanut. “Doesn’t mommy look like a queen?”
“Hello, my love,” Molly stroked her baby’s cheek and kissed him, inhaling his scent.
“You look like a princess,” said Willow as she came to hold my leg.
I could hear the grin in Molly’s tone, “Really? Because your opinion is pretty much life itself.”
I pinched Willow’s nose. Willow must have hugged Molly because Chloe went berserk.
“Wrinkles! Wrinkles! Wrinkles!” Chloe screeched.
Molly laughed, “It’s worth it Chloe, I don’t mind and I doubt Gabe will.”
“He won’t,” I added.
“Okay,” Chloe kissed both our cheeks and took Willow’s hand. “We’ll go get in place.”
Gavin fussed and squirmed and I bounced a little more, “I hate telling you this Molly but I think someone’s hungry.” I said.
Chloe flipped out, “She can’t nurse in the dress!”
Molly took the baby, “No biggie, I can manage.”
The Co-Parent (The Relationship Quo Series Book 3) Page 32