“We had better get on home,” Yost said.
Doug took his wife’s hand. “Me too.”
Miriam felt disappointment descend like fog. She didn’t want to leave, not when Seth smiled at her like that and her heart was like to burst with happiness. How long had it been since she felt so much like herself, so right with the world around her?
Seth folded the quilt over his good arm and stood. “Seems almost too special to use.”
“You will need something to keep you warm in the winter,” Miriam said. “It is more special if you use it. What value does something have if it sits on a shelf?”
“Then I will use it every day.” Seth wiped a leftover tear from his eye. “To remind me of precious relationships and abundant blessings.”
He winked at Miriam and set her heart fluttering.
* * * * *
“Oh Seth, smell the lilacs. Cut me some blooms, and we will fill the house with their sweet smell.”
While a million memories flooded his mind, Seth watched as Miriam put her arm around Yost and left the stable.
He closed his eyes and saw his mother’s hands kneading bread dough in the morning before breakfast. She had worker’s hands with long, thin fingers and veins that stood out in relief. He loved to trace those veins with his fingertips and make a map of them from her wrists to her knuckles.
He heard his mother’s voice, reading him stories about bear hunting and horses. And Bible stories. He could have listened to her tell the story of Noah every day. No matter how many times she told it, tears pooled in her eyes when she lamented how many people died in the flood. “If only they had listened, Seth. If only they had heard God speaking to them.”
She smelled like roses and clover. In the evenings, he would wrap up in his blanket and cuddle next to her. She played with his ears while she read.
Seth buried his face in Miriam’s quilt and wept; for how long, he couldn’t guess. The ache of losing his mamm would never go away. He didn’t want it to. The hurt helped him remember the love.
Miriam had done this. Miriam had helped him remember the love.
If none but God was perfect, then Miriam came very close. She was so pretty, Seth sometimes felt like he had to force his hands behind his back to keep from stroking her silky skin. And when she stood close, Seth couldn’t avoid taking in her scent with every breath. She smelled like an apple orchard right before harvesttime…or sometimes like a honey-cinnamon pumpkin pie.
As he sat stroking his quilt, he knew. This struggle against his own feelings was futile. No one could ever love someone as much as he loved Miriam. How could he possibly banish her from his thoughts when she came to the stable almost every day, distilling her way into his heart like sunlight through the slats of a barn?
The time they spent together had only intensified his feelings for her until she filled up every corner of his being. She was in and through every thought he had, every word he spoke, every breath he breathed.
But how far could he take his love? Would she ever be able to forget Ephraim and marry someone as lowly as Seth Lambright?
Pain kicked him in the gut.
He didn’t dare hope.
The blue fabric of his childhood blanket caught his eye, and he traced his finger around a square of green and yellow triangles. Miriam had given him this quilt. She’d spent hours making it, and her eyes glowed with an inner fire when she handed it to him.
Gathering the quilt in his arms, he clutched it to his chest as if trying to squeeze every last bit of hope from it. The propane lanterns hissed as he sat holding on to it like a lifeline.
Chapter 25
Miriam glanced out the window while she sliced bread for supper. Callie set the table while Mamm tended the pork chops. “We must make two extra loaves tomorrow for gmay,” Mamm said. “The district is growing so big. With those two new families from Lancaster, we will have almost two hundred people at service.”
By the middle of October, the thermometer had taken a journey south. The vibrant rust-and-yellow leaves dazzled Miriam’s eyes on bright afternoons when the waning sun cast its golden glow over the trees. Soon there would be mountains of leaves piled on the roads and in the pastures that would provide rich compost for spring planting.
As she often did lately, Miriam thought of Seth and his eagerness to prepare the fields for winter—with one arm.
Miriam arranged the bread slices on a plate. “There is talk of splitting the district,” she responded.
“Jah, we will see. The Lord’s will be done. It would be nice to feed a smaller group each time instead of cramming people into every nook and cranny of the house.”
Miriam set the bread on the table along with a pat of freshly churned butter and a bottle of homemade raspberry jam. “Seth gets his cast off tomorrow.”
Last week a big cement truck had lumbered up his lane and a crew of men poured the foundation for his new house. She and Seth had both prayed that the weather would be clear so the men would be able to do their work. This week, with his cast freshly removed, Seth and several of the men from the district, along with a crew of construction workers, would start framing the outer walls.
“Gute,” Mamm said. “The poor boy has been long enough without his arm. I know he will be glad to have it back. But I am guessing that you will spend as much time at the stable as ever.”
“Of course,” Miriam said. “I love the horses, and Seth doesn’t mind me there. We have fun together. He made me laugh so hard one time, I snorted—and that made him laugh harder.”
Mamm turned her face from Miriam and gazed out the window. “He is a gute boy. Such a hard worker. And tall and handsome. Your dat says he can hold his own in a Bible discussion too. You know how Dat respects a scholar.”
“Oh yes. He is so quiet that I used to assume he would be dull and hard to talk to. But when you get to know him, he talks plenty. Did you know he almost died three times as a child? The good Lord watched out for him.”
Susie practically skipped into the kitchen. Her eyes sparkled with excitement, and a flattering blush spread across her cheeks. “Mamm, will you come to the living room?”
She left Mamm standing there without waiting for an answer.
Mamm took the chops off the cookstove. “Dinner will get cold.”
Susie reappeared. “And you too, Miriam. I want you to come too.”
Miriam followed Mamm into the living room. Dat sat on the sofa, while Hollow and Susie stood in front of him as if he were conducting an interview. Dat glanced at Mamm doubtfully before she settled onto the sofa. Miriam sat next to Mamm.
To Miriam’s surprise, Hollow took Susie’s hand, right in front of her parents. What was he thinking?
His face glowed bright red and sweat beaded on his face like dew-drops on the grass.
“What is it, Hollow?” Dat asked, clearly uncomfortable with a young man holding his daughter’s hand.
Hollow cleared his throat. “John, I love your daughter, and I am come to ask permission to marry her.”
Dat’s jaw dropped to the floor. He and Mamm looked at each other in astonishment. Miriam covered her mouth with her hand. Could such a perfect solution be possible?
Hollow said no more. Embarrassment or terror rendered him mute.
Susie, on the other hand, beamed and started talking a mile a minute. “This is the answer to my prayer, Dat. I was heartbroken about giving the baby away, but I didn’t want him to grow up without a fater either. Hollow will be a gute fater, and he has a fine job to support the family. The baby can grow up in a normal home. In a few years, no one will remember how he came into the world.”
Dat stood so he could meet Hollow eye-to-eye. He folded his arms across his chest, and his expression grew stern. “I must be told the truth. Are you the father of this child?”
Hollow returned Dat’s serious gaze and shook his head slowly. “Nae, I am not. Only Susie knows who is. If she wants to tell me, I’ll listen. Otherwise, it is her secret.”
&nb
sp; “But people will assume that you are the father. They will talk.”
Hollow squared his shoulders. “Let them talk. I am not afraid of what man can do.”
“So you want to be a fater to my Susie’s baby.”
“Jah. Every baby deserves a gute home. And every mother deserves a husband. Susie especially.”
“There must be more of a reason than the baby to join together,” Dat said. “The baby will not be enough to make you happy.”
Hollow put a protective arm around Susie. “I have loved Susie ever since she came to work for us three years ago. She was young yet; I didn’t need to rush her. But now seems like a good time for it. I would not have her suffer, and I can give her protection from cruel tongues by giving her my name. I would do anything for Susie.”
Miriam wanted to leap from the sofa and embrace this gute man for his willingness to raise another man’s child for Susie’s sake. What more could they hope for?
Dat stuck out his hand. Hollow took it enthusiastically and they shook. “You have permission to marry my daughter.”
Susie squealed and threw her arms around Dat. “Oh, thank you, thank you.”
Miriam and Mamm leaped to their feet and took their turns hugging Susie.
The best possible conclusion to all their months of heartache.
Mamm wiped away tears that were immediately replaced by fresh ones. “I have prayed with all my heart for this day. Blessed be the name of the Lord. I couldn’t ask for a better son-in-law.”
“And I could not ask for a better wife,” Hollow said.
Miriam’s heart swelled in her breast. Susie had her greatest desire— a man who truly adored her.
* * * * *
Miriam refolded a quilt and hung it back on the metal arm. A customer had wanted to see it and then decided not to buy. It was almost time to close. When done with her work at the quilt shop, Miriam would go to the market. With Thanksgiving less than a month away, the store was running a special on frozen turkeys. Mamm wanted her to buy eight whole turkeys. Four turkeys would be cooked for the wedding dinner. The day after the wedding, Mamm and Miriam would can the meat from the other four.
It was decided that the wedding should take place as soon as possible. Susie and Hollow would need to be settled before the baby came, and November began wedding season in Apple Lake. If everyone pitched in with the preparations, they could be married the second week of the month, five weeks before the baby was due to arrive. The bishop agreed to give Susie special baptism instruction classes, which usually took nine weeks, in three weeks’ time. Everything proceeded in the best interest of the baby. The bishop, often so rigid and stern, could bend when someone’s very soul hung in the balance. He was strict, but he was a gute man.
Preparations for the wedding had begun in earnest. It would be small and modest, but Mamm still wanted Susie to remember it as a wonderful day. Because of all the preparations, Miriam spent less time at Seth’s stable than she would have liked, but with his cast gone, at least he could do more of the work himself.
Susie and Hollow would live in the dawdi house attached to the Bontragers’ house. The houses shared a wall, with a private entrance at the side of the big house—a wonderful-gute arrangement for a couple starting out. Miriam had once thought that she and Ephraim might live there the first years of their marriage.
Miriam glanced at the clock on the wall. She could lock the quilt shop entrance in four minutes.
She saw him before he saw her. Ephraim sauntered through the door and gazed around the spacious shop. Miriam had always found his strong profile and confident air attractive. Her heart pounded, and she clenched her teeth. Why could she not root this powerful emotion from her breast?
Miriam hurriedly fluffed the quilt and headed to the back of the store, where Ephraim would never see her behind the rows of quilts. She knew he wanted to avoid an encounter as much as she did.
“Miriam.”
Miriam doubled her pace. Why in the world would Ephraim call her back?
Suddenly, he stood right next to her between two rows of baby quilts. “Miriam, we need to talk.”
She somehow found the courage to meet his eyes. None of the affection they used to hold remained, but she recognized the pity. The expression was like a bee sting right to the heart.
He pitied her? As she had once pitied Seth? The thought made her ill.
“Ephraim,” she managed to choke out before falling silent. If he wanted to talk, let him talk. She couldn’t find any words.
“Miriam, I know what you are trying to do. I understand how you feel. We are both hurting, but this is no way to resolve things.”
“What—what are you talking about?”
“Someday I hope Yost will prove himself to be a gute boy, to repent and be baptized, but even if he were the most righteous boy in the district, I would not hear him. You must understand, Miriam. I am asking you to leave me be.”
Miriam found her voice through her shock. “What have we done to deserve scolding?”
“You know very well that Yost has been to our house three times in the last month.”
“Nae, I did not know that.”
“He asked me to take you back, to give you another chance.” He rubbed the whiskers on his chin. “Nothing good can come of it, Miriam. It will only bring more heartache. Please tell him to stop coming. I am tired of hearing it.”
Miriam caught her breath even as her heart swelled with affection for her brother. Yost had gone to Ephraim, no doubt to try to make amends for his past mistakes. She should have been embarrassed, mortified by such a revelation, but she felt nothing but profound gratitude for Yost. He truly walked taller every day.
Her smile surprised him. “This isn’t funny.”
Miriam looked at the hard line of Ephraim’s mouth and remembered the times it curved into a smile. She thought of what Ephraim’s pride had done to him. Seth had told her that any man would be doubly blessed to have her as a wife. He was teasing her, of course, but for the first time, she saw the truth of his words—saw her own value in the eyes of God. The feeling didn’t feel like pride. It felt like an overdue acknowledgment of her true self who lived to give glory to the Lord.
Ephraim might pity her, but she pitied him all the more.
She would have made him very happy. Seth would say Ephraim had no idea what he had thrown away.
She sighed. Ephraim was every bit as valuable and loved of God as she was. How could she bear him ill will?
She reached out to touch his arm, but he backed away from her. “I am sorry if Yost made you feel uncomfortable. He is trying to make amends in the only way he knows how. He is a gute boy with a gute heart.”
“That has always been your problem with Yost. You do not see him for what he really is.”
Miriam couldn’t keep a sad smile from her face. “We will not trouble you again. May the good Lord be with you.”
She turned her back on him and left Ephraim standing there with only his pride.
* * * * *
Two weeks before Thanksgiving, Susie and Hollow were married in a small ceremony that took place in the Bontragers’ front room. Miriam’s older brothers, Marvin and David, were there from Ohio with their wives and children along with the rest of Miriam’s siblings. Aunts Emma and Erla attended with their families as well as a half dozen district members. Ephraim did not show up, but his dat came with the bishop.
There would be no coupling-up or singing or extra meal, but Miriam thought Susie and Hollow looked every bit the pair deeply in love. “A truly lovely couple. They will be very happy, Lord willing,” she overheard a guest say.
The bishop performed the ceremony in High German and they sang three hymns before Mamm served a hearty dinner of turkey and celery stuffing. Mamm had cooked two turkeys in her stove and Aunt Emma and cousin Kate had each cooked one and brought them.
Except for Laura, Seth and his entire family attended. They rarely saw Seth’s dat at anything. Once the service ended, Set
h jumped up to help put together tables out of benches.
Miriam watched him from the other side of the room, and when he noticed her looking, he grinned. He pointed to his newly healed arm and flexed his muscles.
Miriam laughed at the silly expression on his face. He had grown progressively more animated and cheerful since they’d first talked at the auction last spring. Miriam was glad. She hated to see him unhappy.
Once the tables were ready, he practically raced to her side. She set paper plates and cups on the tables while Callie and Raymond folded plastic forks and knives into napkins.
“It’s been nine days since I have seen you,” he said. “You are prettier than I remember.”
Miriam stifled a smile and kept her eyes trained on her plates. “Ach, quit your teasing. If you are not careful, I will start to believe what you say.”
“It is wonderful-gute for Susie. I think she and Hollow will be as happy as any married couple can be.”
“Jah, and now the healing with the community can begin. Last week at gmay, two people told me what a gute fater I have. He has always been gute, and not only because Susie is married.”
“The community knows the value of your family.” He took the cups from her hand and began placing them beside each plate. “What is for dinner? The smell from the kitchen is delicious.”
“Turkey with celery stuffing. And tart cranberry salad. Susie made it herself. When I marry, I want to make—”
Miriam closed her mouth.
“When I marry?”
Since Ephraim, she hadn’t even considered it a possibility. She furrowed her brow in confusion.
Seth glued his gaze to the stack of cups in his hand. “Have you changed your mind about that?”
“I—I don’t know.”
He must have sensed her confusion, because he tried to lighten her mood. “Well, if you have changed your mind, keep it to yourself, or you will have a score of young men at your doorstep.”
“Stop your teasing this minute, Seth Lambright, or you’ll get no cranberry salad.”
Seth threw up his hands. “I am serious. Ignore my advice at your own peril.”
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