“Yes. Well, and to find some answers, too. Dad should’ve gone through with his search. An explanation might have been all he needed to gain the sense of self he never seemed to find.”
“And what about you?”
“What about me?”
“Don’t you want to know if Marian is your family for you, too? You mentioned a sister. Do you have other siblings? How do they feel about what you’re doing?”
He picked up his drink. “One sister. Older. And she doesn’t know I’m here.”
“Why aren’t you including her in this?”
He sighed. “There’s no point in telling Dana what I’m doing. She’ll only freak out. She thinks Mum is all we should be concentrating on right now. Dad only died a few months ago and she’s grieving despite being divorced from him for a couple of years. But I can’t do anything to help her through that. Anyone who loses someone too soon and too suddenly has to find a way to get through it themselves. She has Dana. She doesn’t need me, too. At least, not every minute. In time, Dana will see that.”
She frowned. “You sound frustrated again.”
“I am.” He pushed his half-eaten meal away as his appetite disappeared. “I’m close to my family. If this goes wrong and I bring more pain to their door, I’ll never forgive myself.”
She covered his hand where it lay on the table. “Look, why don’t you come by my apartment later and we’ll talk more. I have to get back to the office, but I’ll try to help you. Okay?”
Relief washed through him, along with a hefty amount of self-doubt. Was he doing the right thing by pursuing Marian Ball? Or was he hell-bent on a path that could be destructive to both Marian and his family? Something he hadn’t considered before now.
He nodded. “Okay, later.”
She smiled and released his hand. “Later.”
Chapter Eight
A COUPLE OF HOURS LATER, Mac contemplated the activity surrounding him in Marian’s bakery as he nursed his second cup of coffee. Why was he sitting here? After his conversation with Kate, his instincts were screaming at him to get the hell of out Templeton. The more time he spent in the bakery, the more he learned about the woman who could be his grandmother. He’d loitered over two cups of coffee and listened to the conversation around him whenever Marian was mentioned.
The woman’s generosity and popularity made him waver between feeling nauseous to unexpectedly and uselessly proud.
He’d heard stories of her packaging leftovers for the homeless and giving extra bread rolls, pastries or bottled drinks to those who struggled financially or were having a rough time. He’d heard how she gave her time and ear to folks who needed it, how she’d even opened her home to people whose needs merited it.
Each new piece of information only served to make him question his motives. What if she turned a spotlight on his selfish reasons for pursuing her? What if—he swallowed—he succeeded in turning Kate’s slowly emerging fondness for him to disgust?
He looked through the window toward the promenade. She had been right to question what he’d do should Marian reject him.
Yet, Kate and this small town somehow seemed to be seeping into his body and totally messing with his mind. She’d challenged his resentment of Marian, which had diminished his hostility a little. Now he was unsure what he should be feeling about Marian, his life...absolutely everything.
And that uncertainty was due to Kate and what her wisdom and kindness had unraveled inside him. She was making him feel again, thawing the ice around his heart.
He stared at the people strolling along the boardwalk or sitting at tables outside a couple of restaurants. Templeton was a friendly place. An interesting place. He turned and studied the customers chatting with the young women behind the counter. The relaxed atmosphere had caught him off guard once again, and he smiled along with the people around him as they shared a joke or gently ribbed one another about their clothes, jobs, girlfriends or boyfriends.
The small-town camaraderie should have been suffocating. Instead, he wondered what it would feel like to be a part of it. To walk into a place where everyone knew your name, wanted to help with your problems or congratulated you on a recent accomplishment.
It appeared people in Templeton were kind and attentive to everyone, regardless of whether they were family. He scowled, his usual pessimism whenever he thought of long-lasting relationships reemerging.
His phone vibrated on the tabletop and he glanced at the display.
Exhaling, he pressed the button to accept the call. “Dana, hi. What’s up?”
“What’s up is Mum asked me the weirdest thing at lunch today. She asked if I thought there was a chance you could be in Templeton Cove. Now, why would she think you would be in a tiny town miles from home when you’re needed here?”
Mac winced. “I’ve got no idea.”
“No? Well, Mum did. She seems to think you might be looking for Dad’s mum. Our grandmother. Please tell me she’s wrong, and, of course, you wouldn’t act on something that she specifically asked us to leave alone.”
Mac thought of excuses and lies, but what good would it do to delay the truth? Sooner or later he’d come clean to his mum and sister. It was impossible to keep anything from them.
He took a deep breath. “Fine. She’s right. I’m in Templeton.”
“What?”
“I said—”
“You’re in Templeton? What are you thinking? Have you found her? Have you spoken to her? My God, Mac, Mum will go ballistic. You going off on some genealogy mission is the last thing she needs.”
He lowered his voice to keep others from hearing this conversation. “Will you calm down?”
“You had no right to do this. No right at all.”
“Look.” Mac swiped his hand over his face. Whether his mum or Dana approved, knowing his grandmother and her knowing him mattered. Maybe his desire to punish her had diminished, but nothing had changed in his determination to come face-to-face with Marian Ball. “The only woman I’ve found who has any possibility of being our biological grandmother isn’t even here. She’s on vacation. I haven’t said or done anything yet, so you can stop panicking.”
“Good.” Dana huffed down the phone. “So now you can get yourself back here and put Mum’s mind to rest. She told us she didn’t want Dad looking for that woman, let alone us doing so. What on earth possessed you to go against her wishes? This isn’t like you, Mac. You usually care so much how Mum, me and the kids are feeling.”
As disloyalty swept through him, Mac dropped his hand to the table and lowered his voice still further. “This woman is part of our family.” He swallowed as the force of his love for his family rose. “Who knows why she gave Dad up? Maybe he was adopted against her wishes. Maybe she was forced. I can’t leave this alone until I know the truth.”
“And what if the truth causes you more pain? Losing Jilly almost destroyed you. I can’t believe you’re willing to open yourself up to—”
“That’s my choice, isn’t it?” Pain pierced his heart. “Not yours.”
“You lost your new family, something I can barely imagine. But finding this Marian woman isn’t going to bring Jilly and the baby back, no matter how much I wish it would for you.”
“You think I don’t know that?” Did he? Wasn’t that what his coming here had been all about? That he could pass his pain and hurt to a stranger who meant nothing to him? So, how was it that he was starting to take Marian Ball’s feelings into consideration?
Dana sighed. “Look, I’m worried about you, okay? You said you were playing a gig. I didn’t think you lied, least of all to me.”
“It was hardly a lie...more of a half-truth.”
“Meaning?”
“It means I’ve played while I’ve been here. They were a good crowd. A great crowd, in fact.”
“Crowd? I was under the impression T
empleton is tiny.”
“It is. That doesn’t mean they don’t enjoy music. Kate was heading up a charity gig and the Moon Shadows’ guitarist—”
“Who’s Kate?”
Damn it. He grimaced. “What?”
“You said Kate. Who is she?”
“A woman.”
“For the love of God, do I need to come down there? Not only are you looking for a woman Mum specifically asked us not to find, but you’re sleeping with some random woman?”
“I haven’t slept with her, and Kate is not some random woman.” Mac squeezed his eyes shut. “What I mean is, she’s nice. Kind. So whatever you’re thinking, you’ve got it all wrong.”
“Nice? Kind? I haven’t heard you use those words about anyone in years.”
“So?”
“So, what’s going on?”
“Nothing.”
“Mac, listen to me. You can’t go through with looking for Dad’s mum, okay? It will only upset Mum and—”
“I’m doing this for Dad.”
“You’re doing this for you. Dad’s dead, remember?”
Mac gripped his coffee cup. Sometimes his sister drove him near insanity with her insensitivity. Maybe that was why Kate had called him sensitive. He’d had to overcompensate a million and one times to make up for his sister’s tactlessness. He leaned back, his attention drawn to the girl behind the counter, who held a phone to her ear and excitedly gestured to her colleague. The few people lining the counter stepped closer to listen.
With his gaze locked on the girl, he spoke into the phone. “I’ve got to go, Dana. I’ll call you if and when I find anything about Marian Ball. Okay?”
“No, not okay.”
“Just give me a couple of days. If I don’t find anything, I’ll come home.”
“Two days?”
“Two days.”
“And what am I supposed to tell Mum?”
“Nothing, because there’s nothing to tell. I’ll call you.”
He hung up on her protests and turned his phone to silent, watching the commotion at the counter. Bursts of laughter came from the small gathering, their smiles wide, some even wiping away tears. Mac stood and edged closer.
“You did what?” The young girl behind the counter widened her eyes and pressed her hand to her stomach. “You took George’s swimming shorts? In front of everyone around the pool? Marian! Why didn’t he have them on in the first place?” She laughed. “You convinced him to take them off? In a public pool? Eww.”
The crowd erupted with laughter, one guy holding on to the counter as though he might crumple to the floor. Mac smiled. Whether or not Marian was his grandmother, it seemed she was more than game for a laugh.
And wasn’t laughter what his family could use right now?
He turned and headed for the door before he acted on the sudden need to know what else his potential and, currently elusive, grandmother could be up to.
* * *
KATE WORKED ON her laptop, aware Mac would be arriving any minute now. She needed a little more time to finish her initial research into Marian Cohen, once Marian Ball.
Though it had been easy enough to find Marian online, it soon became clear Kate knew little to nothing about Marian before she came to Templeton...and wasn’t likely to uncover anything unless she dug deep. Really deep.
The search engine provided plenty of information about the bakery and Marian’s charitable work. Even a few pictures of her wedding to George on Cowden beach. Next, Kate needed to find out if it was possible to see a copy of her birth certificate, maybe check a census or two from way back.
Kate inhaled a shaky breath.
It felt so wrong to probe into Marian’s past. The older woman had gone above and beyond for Kate during and after her miscarriage, and now Kate was repaying that kindness by digging around where she didn’t belong. But where Mac might.
When his anger had turned to quiet need, it had driven Kate to want to help him any way she could.
A genuine yearning had rung in Mac’s voice. As though meeting Marian might hold something profound for him. Still, if she sensed any maliciousness on Mac’s part, she would do everything she could to shut him down and to escort him out of town, far away from Marian.
She closed down her laptop, putting it to the side of her on the couch. Her suspicion arose from the way she’d recognized his sadness. Mac had lost something in his life. Something big...just as she had.
Dropping her head back, Kate pressed her hand to her stomach. Pain and wanting slithered into her heart, biting and pinching. Why had she thought everything would eventually return to normal? That she could forge a career and not imagine the face of her child over and over?
Marian hadn’t lost her baby. She’d carried him, nurtured him in her womb and then given him to a family who could love him. Kate wiped her tears and abruptly stood, shaking off her self-pity. However Kate looked at it, Marian was a strong and compassionate woman. There was no guessing how she’d react to Mac should she meet him. Marian was a law unto herself.
Kate walked into the kitchen and filled a glass with water. She drank deep and tried to calm her aching heart. Mac needed her help. She would do all she could to support him and protect Marian at the same time.
She refilled her glass as her mind wandered over what she’d learned.
Ball was a common surname, and, at first glance, the number of women named Marian Ball living in southwest England had been overwhelming. There was every possibility Marian’s life had only truly begun when she’d come to the Cove; she and Mac had no right to dig up a past best forgotten.
Yet, it still troubled her how anyone could live close to sixty-five years and leave nothing behind.
Part of her had really wanted to bring something new to the table when he came by, but even her contacts at the housing association and missing persons department hadn’t found anything. Thank goodness. The last thing she wanted was to end up blaming Mac for tainting her view of Marian.
She returned to the living room and sadness pressed down on her. If Marian was Mac’s grandmother and she’d had a child, did she pine for that child? Think about him? Wonder about his health? Whether he had a family? Was happy?
Kate walked to her patio doors and stared toward the fairground, hating that her friend might have been suffering in silence for years. Kate gripped the balcony railing. She had to protect the woman who’d helped countless people in the Cove, young and old. Marian’s heart was bigger than most, and she had a forceful passion for the community and the town itself.
Which led Kate to the only conclusion. If Mac’s father was Marian’s son, his conception, or maybe his birth, was a long-buried secret Marian had made every effort to ensure was never uncovered.
She wanted to help Mac, but she also knew she trusted people too easily and quickly.
Determined that Marian would come first rose once more. If Mac thought, for even a second, that she’d keep his presence a secret from Marian when she returned from vacation, he was mistaken. Kate owed Marian a lot more loyalty than she did to a man she’d known barely a week.
Her apartment buzzer sounded, and Kate turned toward her door, her resolve back in place. Great kisser or not, Mac was just a man. A stranger—one hell of a sexy stranger, but a stranger all the same.
Putting her glass on the coffee table, she took a deep breath and walked to the intercom. “Hello?”
“It’s me.”
Mac’s rich masculine voice rasped down the line, causing a hitch in her chest and a pull in places that had no business feeling pulled. “Come on up. I’m in apartment ninety-one.”
She pressed the buzzer, allowing him access into the apartment block, and unlocked the door, leaving it ajar. She sat back down, pleased that her glass remained steady as she lifted it.
A few moments later, the heavy tread of
Mac’s biker boots sounded outside the door. “Hello?”
“Hi.” She looked up and smiled, her heart beating a little faster at the handsome sight of him as he stepped in. “You found me okay, then?”
“Uh-huh.”
“Do you want a drink? Coffee?”
“No, I’m good. Thanks.”
The seriousness of his tone and the distraction in his gaze raised Kate’s wariness. She thought they’d gotten past their initial push-pull and moved toward something more intimate. He’d opened up to her about his search. Was this where he shut down or shut her out?
Clearing her throat, she waved toward the couch. “Have a seat.”
He looked at her, his gaze steady. “I have news.”
“About Marian?”
“Yes. I stopped by the bakery again this afternoon, and it seems she’s having a great time.”
Kate relaxed, the tension leaving her body. She laughed. “Marian doesn’t know how not to have a great time. That isn’t news, Mac. Well, maybe it is to you because you haven’t met her, but—”
“That isn’t the news.”
She stilled. “Oh.”
He shrugged out of his jacket, and Kate drew her gaze over his broad chest beneath his dark blue T-shirt, then over his arms. Attraction stirred in her as she stared at the tattoos on his forearms. Black-and-blue ink depicted a raging sea, a crack of lightning. Another showed a face, mouth open and grimacing as though in pain.
She met his eyes, questions freezing on her tongue.
He stared back at her. “They each mean something. The tattoos.”
She nodded, unsure how to respond. The tattoos were dark, angry...so like Mac.
He drew an envelope from the inside pocket of his leather jacket and handed it to her. “This is the news.”
Curiosity chased away her wariness, but as she moved to take the envelope, he touched her hand. “Before you open it, I need to tell you what I’ve been doing this afternoon.”
She laid the envelope in her lap, and he clenched both his hands on his thighs. His biceps strained against the sleeves of his shirt, illustrating his tension.
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