by Demi Alex
And that, in a nutshell, was the issue. When the vacation was over, I’d have to choose. One man. No sharing. Pressure squeezed over my heart, but not from pleasure. It hurt.
Gentle hands lifted my breasts, and Mark arranged the full cups of the bikini top under my breasts, then secured it at my back. I reached to arrange the shoulder straps, but he moved my hands away and fit the bathing suit carefully. He smoothed over each breast and spread the material over my bottom. Basically, I was more dressed and covered than in my skirt outfit.
Jake made a right, pulling to the rear of a colorful wood-framed cottage. “We’re here. Charles serves the best jerk chicken on the island.”
“Hold on,” Mark said, bunching a floral dress in his hands and fitting it over my head. He pulled it down my body and covered my thighs. “We’re almost ready. I need Lora’s water shoes.”
Lucas handed him a pair of black Body Glove shoes, and Mark put them on my feet. I felt like a doll being dressed for a play date. Grinning and with a quick kiss to my forehead, Mark released me and exited on his side of the Hummer.
Jake opened my door and helped me out. He skimmed his palms down the sides of my body. “Very pretty.”
“And proper,” I added, adjusting the skirt of my dress and feeling it fall to just above my knees. “If it wasn’t for the plug in my ass—
“Shh, Bella. I’ll take care of that in a little while,” Jake interrupted. “We’ll eat lunch and you can drink some of the Blue Mountain coffee you’ve been asking for, then I’ll remove it.”
“Coffee? Now?” They’d been refusing me the Blue Mountain coffee all morning, but he was offering it with lunch. Didn’t they have soft drinks on the island?
He simply nodded, and took my hand in his. We walked to a picnic table Luca and Mark had already claimed on the patio. Jake sat beside me, our backs to the quaint building, and the most amazing view before us. “Wow,” I breathed.
“You’ve been saying that a lot,” Luca said.
“This place is amazing,” I said. “The greenest mountains I’ve ever seen, with ancient trees and sweet flowers, and the waters…now I understand the color turquoise. It’s heavenly.”
“After I got over the shock of you being at the resort without protection, I have to admit, I’m glad you came.” Mark reached across the table and covered my hand. “Being here with you is perfect.”
A cheerful, yet distinguished and very bald gentleman, wearing an apron with a sketch of a young child sporting a full head of dreadlocks and the cursive scrawl of the word IRIE across his big belly, approached with a big smile.
“Mr. Charles,” Jake said, rising from the bench and reaching to relieve the man of his load. He took two of the four frosted bottles of Red Stripe that hung from Mr. Charles’s fingers, and when the older man placed the remaining beers on the table, shook his hand with vigor. “It’s so good to see you, sir.”
“Welcome back, boys.” Mr. Charles placed a big hand on each of Luca and Mark’s shoulders and wrapped his fingers tight. Then he nodded and smiled big at me. “It’s about time you added beauty to the group. Welcome, girl.”
“Thank you,” I said, feeling Jake’s arm wrap around my waist.
“This is Lorabella,” Jake introduced. “It’s her first time on the island, so we’re showing her the best Jamaica has to offer. She’s looking forward to your cooking, Mr. Charles.”
“Ah, I see.” Mr. Charles appeared confused. “I’m sorry. I’ll bring your lady her coffee. I thought it was for Luca’s girl. Let me get that for you, Lorabella.”
Shifting in my seat, I glanced from Mark, to Luca, to Jake. I saw no discomfort on their faces. They reached for their beers and raised them in a toast. “To the beauty in our group.”
I struggled to keep smiling, but my gut twisted in pain and I wrapped an arm across my belly. Mr. Charles was correct to be confused, and the situation was entirely my fault. I had run away, made the men follow me for my own good, and all because I needed to figure out what I wanted. I figured it out, and I was more screwed then when I’d started.
I wanted them all.
I didn’t mean to tarnish my men’s reputations, but that was what I was doing. Temporary or not, these strong and powerful men hindered their professional aspirations by indulging me.
“Are you feeling okay, Bella?” Jake’s fingers feathered over my arm and settled at my nape in a concerned massage, knocking me from my reverie.
I looked up at him and smiled. “Sure. I was just thinking.”
“We think,” Luca reminded sharply. He shook his head, but didn’t elaborate as he pulled a ringing cell phone from his pocket.
“Hello?” His dark gaze lifted back to mine. “No, no. It’s Luca…Just fine, Mrs. Simmons. Jamaica is beautiful.”
My mother! My heart stopped.
Luca was speaking to my mom.
I stared at him, holding my breath as if afraid of being heard.
“We’re out touring the island and stopped off for some lunch…I will…Thank you, ma’am…Absolutely. She’s right here…Okay. We’d love that. See you on Sunday. Thank you.” He held out his hand and offered me the phone. “It’s your mom, sweetheart.”
What was I supposed to say to the woman? Mom, I’m in Jamaica, having the time of my life with all three of them!
“Bella,” Jake said, squeezing my waist. “Take the phone.”
Unable to move, I shook my head.
Jake grabbed the phone and placed it against my ear.
Hi, Mom, Mark mouthed silently.
“Hi, Mom,” I said. “How are you?”
“How am I? How are you?” she shrieked in my ear. “Why didn’t you tell me you were going on vacation with Luca? I thought you were heading to some lame spa place for the week.”
“I…I didn’t—
“Well, is he everything you dreamed he would be? Does he treat you well?” Mom spoke so fast, I couldn’t have answered if I tried. “Does he see to your needs and satisfy you, honey?”
“Yes,” I managed to slip in.
“Please tell me you bought new underwear. Lace? Not those Granny panties you like.”
“Yes, Mom,” I breathed.
“Good. Good. In that case, I won’t keep you from Luca. Enjoy yourselves and call me when you land on Saturday.”
I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye. She was gone.
Bursting with laughter, Jake lowered the phone to the table and pinched my side. “Granny panties?”
I pulled away, smacked his shoulder, and stuck my tongue out, indulging my inner brat. “You’re not funny. I’m sitting here with you, Mr. Charles thinks I’m your girl, and my mother thinks I’m off on a romantic vacation with Luca.”
“You are,” they all said in unison, raising their beers for another toast.
I stood and braced my hands on the table. “It’s not funny. How do I explain?” I stepped over the bench and away from the table. Jake sobered and scowled. He reached for my hand, but I yanked it away. “I need a few minutes alone. Please.”
Turning, I almost collided with Mr. Charles. He was holding my coffee. “I suggest you add some cream to this, girl. Take it over to my special place, and sit in one of the chairs beneath those trees. I like to think in that spot. It’s peaceful.”
“Thank you.” I accepted the coffee, passed on the cream, and made my way down the hill.
Mr. Charles was right. The clearing was very peaceful. I sat on double sized Adirondack chair and sipped on the potent brew, realizing he had also been correct about the need for cream. The soft breeze mellowed my mood, and I found taking deep breaths helped clear my mind.
I’d snapped. I’d taken out my frustrations over my indecision on the men, and while my reaction may have been over the top, the problem was much greater than what other people would think. Mark, Jake, and Luca expected me to choose.
I dropped my head and let the tears flow. I’m not sure how long I stayed there, or when I decided that I couldn’t decide. But I kne
w that my heart hurt too much to think about it any longer. I was emotionally exhausted.
“Lora?” Mark stood next to me, one hand holding a fresh cup of coffee, the other fisted at his side. “Can I sit with you?”
I wiped the moisture from my cheeks and nodded. He sat and offered the new cup. “This one has cream.”
“Thank you,” I said, accepting the coffee and holding the mug with both hands. “It does need cream.”
“I know, baby,” he said, gathering me in his arms and dropping tender kisses on my head. “This is our family time. We’re supposed to be enjoying this beautiful island together and smiling at every turn. I can’t stand seeing you upset like this.”
“I’m sorry,” I breathed, angling my body away.
“Don’t be,” he said. He pulled me back on his reliable comfort, wrapped his arms across my heaving chest, and rested his chin on my head. “I promise to take care of it.”
I sighed and dropped a kiss on his forearm. Mark made me feel safe and cared for. My tears stopped and as I leaned against him, I absorbed his strength.
We sat there, watching butterflies skim the landscape, and listening to the quiet talk between Luca and Jake. I couldn’t make out what they were discussing, but they weren’t laughing either. I looked back at them, and felt a real consolation in their presence.
“Lora, you need to know that when it comes to our relationship and how it’s perceived, you are the only one I worry about. We worry about, Jake and Luca included,” he amended. “You’re our only priority. If you don’t like something, we’ll change it.”
“It’s not about me. I was doomed going into this,” I said, clearing my throat. “It’s about all of you.”
“I’m not following you,” he said, pressing me to explain.
I traced the lines of his muscular arm, trying to choose my words carefully. “I came here because I was in love with three men.”
His chest rose as he inhaled. He rested his face in my hair and sighed. “Hopefully the same three men who are in love with you. Say it’s us.”
“Of course it’s you,” I blurted, turning to look at him. “I love you.”
He lowered his face and claimed my lips in a deep kiss. “I’ve loved you from the first moment I saw you, baby. I love you more each day.”
“But I also love Jake and Mark,” I confessed, feeling the tears building again and scraping my teeth over my lip to hold them back.
“I know, baby. They know.” He raised an arm over his head and motioned to the others. “Please don’t tell me that’s what has you upset. Don’t tell me that’s the supposed problem keeping you from us.”
“It is,” I whispered and lowered my blurry gaze, turning to bury my face in his chest. My chin trembled and sobs raked through me. I tried to stop crying, but I couldn’t. There was no easy or correct choice between these men. I had to leave. “I can’t choose.”
“Then don’t, Bella.”
I looked up. Jake and Luca were squatting in front of us.
“What about your careers? What will people think? What do we say?”
Luca shrugged. “Nothing. It’s none of their business.”
“No one is privileged to what goes on in our home and our bedroom, baby. That’s between us,” Mark said. “But unless we plan on moving to the Himalayans, our private life is just that. Private. Our careers and acquaintances are on a need to know basis.”
Was Mark really saying what I was hearing? Was there a chance to be with the men I loved and keep my heart intact? My gaze traveled from on to the other, studying each handsome face carefully.
“I love you, sweetheart, so I’ll take you anyway I can have you. It’s up to you.” Luca lifted his shoulders, as if not worrying that our relationship would be understood. “You need to accept us. Accept that what we have between us is special, and come to terms with having three men hovering over you. At all times.”
I looked at Jake, my stable and steady peacekeeper. He smiled. “Bella, you know I love you. We can do this. We will do this.”
“How?” I asked, hope blooming around me.
“Do I need to put you over my knee and remind you that it’s not your place to think for the rest of the week?” Jake teased, but the relief in his tone was obvious. He leaned forward and kissed me long and sweet. “I love you, Bella. I need you. We need you.”
“Trust us,” Mark said, taking my hand. “We won’t let you down.”
“You have my complete trust,” I said, relief flooding my veins. The pressure in my chest took flight, and I smiled at the men who held my heart. “I love you, too.”
* * * *
“Lunch is served,” Mr. Charles called. “Gather around.”
Luca pulled me up and into his arms, planted a wet kiss on my mouth and laughed. “If they would have listened to me from day one, we could have avoided all the tears. I told them your heart was big enough for all of us.”
“What?” I looked from Mark to Jake.
“Busted,” Jake said, grinning and raising his hands to the side of his head in submission.
“True,” Mark confirmed. “Luca had it right from the start.”
“Age doesn’t equal wisdom,” Luca said, and winked. He lifted me off the ground, wrapped my legs around his waist, and set his hands on my butt as he carried me up the hill. “Now that we’ve settled the heavy-duty stuff, we need to remove this plug before lunch.”
“I got that. Later is fine,” Jake said, reaching out and taking me from Luca. “I promised Lora that I’d see to it.”
I dropped my head to Jake’s shoulder and kissed the side of his neck. I was so happy. My men walked side by side, rubbing my arms and playfully pinching my thighs. My world was perfect.
“Thank you, Lorabella,” Mark said, leaning down and kissing my head. “Nothing will ever come between us again. We’re making ‘us’ official tonight.”
“I love you,” I said, falling deeper in love with every breath.
Chapter Eighteen
We climbed the infamous falls, swam in a private watering hole, danced to every sultry beat, and ate every kind of jerk meat and delectable patty.
Since Luca and Mark had clearly voiced their approval of our relationship, Jake was my only concern. Not that he showed any sign of disapproval. He didn’t. But what if his peacekeeper persona was all that kept him smiling? What if that strict disciplinarian in him wanted to impose a different set of rules?
“I don’t appreciate that look, Bella.” Jake’s voice startled me out of my thoughts, and I realized the Hummer had parked at the resort. “We’re returning from a wonderful day on the island and your forehead is marked with worry. Do I need to take you over my knee and remind you not to think and only to feel?”
Mark shook his head, but didn’t speak. He opened the car door and stepped out. I thought I heard Luca chuckle as he joined Mark, but I wasn’t sure. They walked around the vehicle and opened the rear door.
“Lora and I need some time,” Jake announced. “We’re going for a little walk before we head back to the room.”
Mark nodded and pulled a pack from the car. Luca grabbed a bag of souvenirs.
“We’ll be upstairs,” Mark said, waiting for me to step out of the car. He leaned down and dropped a kiss on my head. “See you soon, baby.”
Luca didn’t say anything, but he lifted my chin and brushed his lips across my mouth in a tender kiss. He turned and walked away with Mark, leaving me alone with Jake.
“I thought we settled any doubts,” Jake said, closing tight fingers around my hand and pulling it close against his side as he started down a small path. “I don’t appreciate the questioning of our bond because we change locales. It doesn’t matter where we are, whom we’re with, nothing changes between us. You’re ours. We love you, and we’re proud to have you beside us. We want to be your men.” He squeezed my hand. “I want to be your man. I love you, Bella.”
“I love you,” I breathed, lifting our clasped hands to my mouth and brushi
ng my lips over his knuckles. The sun had dropped behind the trees, and the temperature had cooled a tiny bit. I moved closer to Jake, and he immediately shifted my hand into his other hand and wrapped an arm around my waist. He held me tight, conveying his ownership without any reservation.
“For your own peace of mind, I’m going to establish a few rules,” he said, his strong stride a peculiar reassurance for me. “Whenever doubt crosses your mind, or you in anyway feel insecure about us, you will immediately come to me. No matter where we are, you will request to be reminded that you are to feel. Only feel. You will present your ass for the reminding.”
I looked up at his determined face and didn’t miss his intention. He’d use his hands to remind me. I recalled the morning’s reminding, and craved the feel of his hand on my skin. “You want me to approach you in any setting?”
“Any setting,” he confirmed. “It’s my duty to keep you secure and confident. I don’t care where that may be.”
We continued walking, and he didn’t elaborate further. He allowed time for the concept to take root in my mind. And it did. I could see him disciplining me in an elevator, with me bent before him. He would discipline me in the car, splaying me across his lap. His hand would sting my ass in a neighborhood café or in a public restaurant, in earshot of others, but out of their view. My favorite scenario was in his office, naked and exposed on his desk, as his belt marked my backside. Moisture pooled between my legs as the visions solidified in my mind.
“However, because of privacy needs, unless specifically told not to, you will only wear dresses and skirts from this point on. I demand full access at any time, and I will not tolerate the inconvenience pants present,” he said, adding to my fantasy.
Relief settled in my chest. I wanted him to have full access, and pants would be a problem in certain situations. The sting on my ass centered me, and I needed for him to take me to a place where I could only feel. I nodded.