by Alyson Belle
What can I do? Crap crap crap. If I couldn’t hurt it, that meant Erlix’s DPS would be our only chance to defeat this thing, so I had to stop him from killing Erlix… without getting myself killed in the process. I’d have to step in and do what Courtesans did best: crowd control. I put two fingers in my mouth and gave a shrill whistle, drawing the attention of the Ogre Soulburner while Erlix climbed back to his feet, and once he was looking at me, I ripped my top open and did my best Seduce , shaking my tits for the beast and hoping he wasn’t immune to that at least.
His massive cock stirred beneath his leather loincloth and he dropped his knuckles to the ground, dragging them as he wandered back over toward me. He was 12 feet tall, and judging by his bulge he’d likely split my character in half if he tried to mount me, but I had no intention of fucking him! I just needed to buy Erlix some time. I started grabbing my breasts and gyrating my hips, dancing and doing my best to keep the Seduce active. I knew that the better the performance I put out, the better my odds of keeping him enthralled were. He stopped a few feet away from me, smiling a dopey ogre smile at me and drooling in a slack-jawed slouch which I did my humiliating strip-tease for the ogre.
“Yeah, big boy,” I said, forcing a smile. “You like my hot little body?”
Nambla hooted at me from the sidelines. “Nice one, Kromgorn. How long you think you’re gonna be able to keep him busy with your slutty little dance?”
I ignored Nambla and focused on touching myself in all the sexy ways I had seen girls do to get guys hot and bothered—bending over, smacking my ass, shaking my tits—while I tried to come up with a plan. Erlix was back in action and circling behind the boss ogre again, but another surprise attack wouldn’t be enough. The halfling was at 20% health and the boss still had more than 80%! If he interrupted my Seduce , he’d get himself killed for sure. No ogre was going to stand around and be poked to death no matter how hot the dancer in front of him was.
But that wasn’t the only trick I had up my sleeve. It was time to get physical! I danced closer to the ogre, ignoring Erlix’s hissed warnings, and looped my dainty arms around his neck. He was still smiling and drooling on me, and he smelled awful, but I forced myself to pretend I was having a fantastic time. “ Kama Sutra, ” I said. Suddenly I was wrapping myself around his 12-foot body in crazy and impossible ways! Our limbs were tangled together like the craziest game of Twister I’d ever imagined. Both of us bent in directions I didn’t even know joints could bend, his loincloth flew off, and it was only thanks to my hot little bod’s impressive flexibility that my arms didn’t get yanked out of their sockets. The ogre ended up looking like he was tied in a knot, facedown on the floor with his back bent almost double, held securely in place by my Kama Sutra debuff, and I sat on top of his torso, astride his massive, newly-exposed penis, with my mouth a perfect open ‘O’ of surprise.
Both Erlix and Nambla’s eyes almost popped out of their sockets. “Holy shit, goldie!” Erlix said. “Are you gonna, uh, fuck that ogre?”
“Shut up and get stabbing!” I shouted, grimacing at the massive penis waggling in my face. It was nearly two feet long, six inches around, and rock-solid. “I’m not sure how long I can hold him like this.”
Erlix didn’t need to be told twice. He dove in and started stabbing the Ogre Soulburner again and again, whittling down his hit points while the ogre struggled in the tied up physical grasp of my Kama Sutra hold. My arms were still tangled with his body in a way I didn’t totally understand, but my hands were close enough that I could seize the penis, and I grabbed it just in case it helped with the timer. The ogre made a really weird noise when I squeezed his dick, like a pleasure howl, despite the fact that a halfling was plinking him to death at the same time.
“Hey, that’s not fair!” screamed Nambla. “You can’t pin him down and kill him like that! It’s an abuse of game mechanics.”
“Can and will!” I called back, sticking my tongue out. “You’ve never seen what a high-level Courtesan can do, numbskull. Your ogre’s ass is ours.”
I tensed my limbs and my grip and watched with satisfaction as Erlix whittled him down to 60%, 50%, and 40%, my hope growing that we might actually be able to kill him before my skill faded, but then at 35% he started glowing red and shaking. He shook so hard that he was vibrating me, and my teeth began to chatter as I felt his body get hot beneath me.
Oh shit—what’s he… But then I remembered. At 35% he cast Soulburn !
“Erlix, watch out!” I cried. “Let me eat the Soulburn !”
But it was too late. Erlix had been stabbing him in the head, jamming his daggers in again and again, and now the ogre’s mouth opened and vomited fire all over Erlix.
“Noooooo!” Erlix shouted, flipping backwards, but I could see the debuff ticking down his health. He ran back to try to stab the ogre some more, but the debuff reduced physical damage dealt by 90%, and meanwhile he was burning down! I watched him drop: 19%, 18%, 17%. No matter how furiously he stabbed, he couldn’t do any more damage to the ogre, and when he died, I’d really be screwed!
“Think fast, think fast,” I told myself. I was out of tricks! I didn’t have any items or skills that could put out the fire, and it sure wouldn’t help to cast any illusion spells right now. I couldn’t even try to beat the fire out with a cloak or anything, since I was busy keeping the ogre pinned and my hands were full of giant ogre cock.
My eyes widened. Yes! My hands are full of giant ogre cock.
I squeezed his massive blue cock again and began to jerk on it as furiously as I could, yanking and pulling and stroking like only a Courtesan can. The beast stopped roaring and began to make weird grunting noises again, sounding more and more excited. He quit struggling and started thrusting his pelvis into my strokes, totally immobilized but getting what was probably the best hand job he’d ever had. As for me, I was about as grossed out as I’d ever been, but if I had to jerk off an ogre to save my friends, then I’d jerk off an ogre to save my friends.
“What are you doing, Goldie?” Erlix kept stabbing ineffectually at the ogre’s face, trying to do something as the flames flickered around him and his health dropped further: 10%, 9%, 8%.
Suddenly the ogre roared with a howling groan of pleasure, and thick, goopy ogre spunk shot out and splashed all over Erlix, totally coating him in slime. DING! DING! DING! DING! DING!
My jaw dropped open in surprise as the ogre’s cock deflated in my hands and the beast heaved a sigh of contentment, relaxing into a floppy state of calm that made keeping him pinned easier than ever. Apparently the game counted that as a successful seduction and gave me XP for a level 60 boss Seduce ! I’d gained five levels and was now a level 55 Courtesan. But more importantly, the spunk had worked as I’d hoped and put out the fire on the halfling.
“Get him, Erlix!” I cried.
Erlix was standing frozen in shock, trembling in his coat of ogre spunk, as the last of the flames died away. He wiped it off of his face, shuddering in disgust, and blinked at me. He opened his mouth and then closed it. Then he walked over and calmly stabbed the ogre in the neck over and over again until the beast expired. The ogre’s body trembled as it dropped to 0% health, and I untangled myself as it faded away to reveal a small treasure chest.
“Ooh, boss loot!” I said.
When the ogre died, the gates had raised, but Nambla was nowhere to be seen now. He seemed to have slipped away again while we finished off the ogre.
As I slipped back into my clothing and bound my bouncing curves back into my leather outfit, Erlix painstakingly began to clean every inch of his body with the ogre’s discarded loincloth, retching and gagging. His out-of-combat regen slowly refilled his health. “I swear to god, Goldie, if that hadn’t worked… In fact, I’m still not happy about it. We’re never speaking about this again, okay? So help me…”
I shrugged and opened the chest. “I’m just psyched we beat him. And serves you right for that time you made me jerk off a couple of orc guards. How do you like it, huh?
Ah, there’s a Lv. 50 Jaunty Hat here! I can’t wear it. Halflings only. You want it?”
I held the festive blue linen hat out to him as he glared at me and rubbed the rest of the spunk off his arms. “I seem to recall I didn’t actually make you finish those orcs.”
A wide, innocent smile stretched across my face. “Oh, silly me. Must have forgotten. Anyway, I assumed the best rogue on the server could handle a little goop.”
“Let’s just go find Nambla before he escapes again,” he muttered, still glaring. “And yes, I accept your conciliatory hat.” He tugged it onto his head and shuddered. “That was unbelievably disgusting.”
Chapter 10
Nambla was at the top of the steps to the next floor, fumbling through his sack and grumbling to himself. “Shit, shit, where’s the key? I saved too many drops to sell for gold, damn it…” He pounded on the golden door behind him. “Wugduz, they beat the ogre! Let me in, quick!”
“Too late, douchebag.”
Nambla looked awfully worried as I approached, and with good reason. At level 55, I was finally high enough that I was a real threat to him, since he was only level 62 and he couldn’t hurt me at all, thanks my still-active Charm on Vierdimin. Erlix was warily stealthed behind me, since Nambla could hurt him , but I knew Nambla didn’t know what skills I might have up my sleeve, and my bow would do enough damage to him that I could slay him and take all his gear.
“Tell you what,” I said. “Hand that bag over now, tell me everything you know, and I won’t steal your gear. Sound fair?”
Nambla looked from his bag full of vendor trash, to the locked door, and then back to me and licked his lips. “I don’t know much,” he said. “What do you want to know?”
I smirked. I knew the Secret Order was full of traitorous cowards! You reap what you sow, Vierdimin.
“Let’s start with the bag.” I held my hand out, and when he didn’t immediately hand it over I reached for my bow. Then he quickly tossed it at my feet.
“Th-there. You can have it. It’s all vendor trash anyway, and the stupid Fey tower key is in there somewhere. It’s what we used to lock the floors off.”
He shifted nervously, clearly annoyed at having to give me anything, but I knew Nambla loved his prized raiding gear. He’d do just about anything to hang onto it, and he was almost never in a situation where he was vulnerable to losing it all like this.
“What’s Vierdimin doing?” I demanded. “Why is he playing games with us? What does he have planned?”
Nambla blinked at me. “Are you slow or something?”
I growled and he lifted his hands defensively.
“Okay, okay, sorry… jeez. He’s playing games with you because that’s what Vierdimin likes to do. Duh. Why seal yourself in a game if you don’t have people to play with?” Nambla sneered. “We’re all toys to him—you just picked the wrong side.”
“How do we find him?”
“You don’t. I don’t think you get it. When Vierdimin set off his little reality bomb, he was already the most powerful player in the game, and he’s only gotten stronger since then. He’ll find you when he’s ready to engage. Right now he’s just messing with you until he finds a way around this little inconvenience… the rest of the Secret Order is leveling up in peace while you Shining Army dolts flail around chasing your tails.”
I sucked my breath in through my teeth, burning with frustration. I knew that they’d be leveling, but it was annoying that these kidnappings were all part of a strategy to keep us busy. I hated being reactive to what Vierdimin wanted. It meant I had to find Topper and Jazzus that much faster so that we could get back on track and hopefully go on the offensive. I wished I knew more about Vierdimin’s plans, but it didn’t seem likely that I’d get much out of Nambla.
“Tell me everything you know about this weird spell that has us trapped here,” I demanded.
Nambla shrugged. “He doesn’t tell us much. It’s a combination of hacking and in-game magic. I have no idea how it works.”
“Aren’t you worried about dying in the real world?”
Nambla looked surprised. “Wait, what?”
I shook my head. He hadn’t even told his men… or he doesn’t know. “You’re an idiot, Nambla. We’re all in comas in the real world. I hope you have someone who cares enough about you to keep your ass alive. Vierdimin didn’t say anything about it?”
“N-no.” His face paled, and he looked like he was about to be sick. “He just told us we’d be fine... I, uh, didn’t even stop to think about what would happen to my real body...”
“Then you’re even dumber than you look. Anything else you can think of I should know?”
He didn’t respond, and I decided that I’d wasted enough time talking to this lackey. Vierdimin was too smart to share his plans with his underlings, anyway. I’d just need to figure out how to stop him on my own.
I raised my bow and loosed an arrow right into the center of his chest. His mouth dropped open in surprise as he stared at his newly bleeding wound. “What the hell?”
“Eat arrows, douchebag.” I fired arrow after arrow into Nambla, taking 6% of his health off with each shot. Nambla started to howl, racing back and forth between the door and me, but my body was blocking the narrow passage and the door was still locked—he couldn’t get around me and couldn’t hurt me.
“You promised to let me go, you stupid whore!” he wailed. His health ticked down: 58%, 52%, 46%.
“Yeah, well, you’re an asshole.” I released another volley of arrows. “And I lied. I’ll enjoy vendoring your gear. Who’s the stupid whore now?”
He crumpled onto the marble, still begging for his life, as my arrows finally brought him down to 0%. Then he faded away, returning to his bind point while his nice, 60th-level raid gear remained. Erlix unstealthed behind me.
“Damn, Goldie. That was cold .”
“It’s better than he deserved. Help yourself to his gear. Maybe some level 60 rogue gear will come in handy in a few levels. We probably shouldn’t actually vendor it.”
“Don’t mind if I do!” Erlix skipped over and gathered up Nambla’s loot eagerly while I dug through his discarded bag until I found an ornate, golden key. It fit perfectly into the over-sized lock on the door to the third floor and turned smoothly with a sound like wind chimes.
“Wow, he had some nice stuff,” Erlix muttered. “I can’t use it for a few levels, but at level 40 I’ll be able to wear it with penalties… not bad. The golden treasure ho is the gift that keeps on giving! Thanks, Goldie. That almost makes up for dousing me in ogre spooge.”
I rolled my eyes. “Come on, and stay on your toes. We still have to deal with Wugduz and Lefay, and they’re both nastier than Nambla was.”
The golden door opened into a long hallway that was smaller than the floor below us, with a single side door and some steps up. I spotted Wugduz right away. He was sitting with his arms crossed, smack in the middle of the hallway, in front of the stairwell up to the final floor. The Lv. 65 Ogre Shadowknight made for an imposing lump of bulk in his jet-black armor, and he stared at me with a silent glower of grim determination.
“Be careful…” Erlix whispered. “Looks like another trap. Better go check it out.”
But I was running out of patience for their games. I marched right up to Wugduz and put my hands on my hips, not even caring if I looked utterly unintimidating in dainty little feminine body. “You better scram, meathead,” I warned him. “I already turned your rogue buddy into a pincushion, and I’m not afraid to do the same thing to you.”
Wugduz snorted. “Big whoop. That rogue was an idiot. I didn’t like him much anyway. If you think you’re getting past me that easily, think again.”
I raised my bow menacingly. “Fine. You asked for it.”
I released an arrow right at his face, but it bounced harmlessly off his nose guard. Annoyed, I started shooting them as quickly as I could draw them, sending a flurry of arrows into his massive bulk. But Wugduz had 10 levels on me
and he wasn’t some flimsy rogue. He was a fully raid-geared tank, and when I did scratch him once in a while his regeneration from his gear bounced him right back up to 100%. I threw my bow down on the ground in frustration and shoved against his body as hard as I could, trying to shift him out of the way, but he didn’t move an inch. He just blinked at me.
“You know that you’re going to die outside of game if you don’t help us with Vierdimin, right?”
Wugduz laughed. “Nambla’s an idiot, like I said. Lefay and I took better precautions. We figured we’d need someone to take care of our bodies once Vierdimin pulled us in-game for good. I’m in a hospital on an IV nutrient drip. I’ll be just fine.”
I wanted to scream and stamp my feet, which wasn’t at all barbarian-like, but I’d been a girl for quite a while now. The ogre was so damned smug and composed, like there was approximately 0% chance of me getting past him and he was so superior. It was infuriating.
“Get out of my way, damn it!”
“Why don’t you see if it helps to suck my cock?”
I glared at him. He was too huge, and I had no idea what to do about it. Smaller than the giant ogre we’d faced on the previous floor, but plenty big enough to block the passage. Erlix might be able to hurt him, but Wugduz would be able to clobber Erlix with ease, and as a player he’d be a lot harder for me to disable with my skills than the boss had been, even if we could afford to wait for my cooldowns. There was nothing I could do to move him as long as he sat planted where he was. Rather than give him the satisfaction of watching me struggle, I retreated to the previous landing with Erlix so that we could discuss our options out of earshot.
“What do we do now?” I moaned. “He can’t hurt me, but I can’t hurt him either! And his fat ass is blocking the hallway unless we can take him out somehow.”
“Yeah, your booby dancing isn’t going to help us on him, is it?” Erlix scratched his head under his new hat and then sniffed his fingers. “Ugh, I missed some goop. It’s in my hair, Goldie!”