by A. Nybo
Exhibitionism had never really done anything for me before, but knowing it was Dan watching us made me super hard. Josh took my face between his hands and nearly devoured me when he kissed me, so I guessed it must have done something for him as well. Fuck, between him and Dan, the two of them were going to make me come before I did anything come-worthy.
I yanked the stud and Velcro open on Josh’s boardies, and he lifted slightly so I could slide them down his hips. I lifted the front of his tank top and stopped kissing him long enough to slip the front over his head so it sat bunched at the back of his neck. Sitting on my haunches, I ran my hand down his front and simply appreciated. The way the tank top still sat around his arms and over his shoulders accentuated his shape. Hell, he was something else.
Leaning forward, I kissed him before using my tongue and lips to trail down his neck and chest to nipples surrounded by a few black hairs. I sucked a hardened nipple into my mouth and when I gave it a little tug between my teeth, I felt his cock flex against my body. Ooh, he liked that. I moved to the other nipple to suck and tug again and received the same response. This time there was a little moan to go along with it. I was so going to remember that at the crucial moment.
Continuing on my journey, I moved down and teased the hell out of him by mouthing all around the main attraction. I kissed and bit at his hips, his inner thighs, and those hot-as-hell veins in his lower abdomen that popped all the way down into his pubes. He was beginning to writhe in an attempt to get me to take him in my mouth.
Finally I held his hard-on against his body and licked my way up from his balls, over the base, lifting his cock as I went so I could end with my mouth over the head. Josh released a delicious groan that made my own cock sit up and take greater interest—as if that were possible. I tongued around the tip before sliding down as far as I could take him without choking.
Cupping his balls with one hand, I began to massage them as my other hand trailed up over his abs to find a nipple to tweak, since he’d liked that so much. Then I went to town on him and sucked, rubbed, and tweaked. I glanced up at him, and oh yeah, he was in seventh heaven. He opened his eyes and looked down into mine. His blink was real slow as he savored the pleasure, and wasn’t that a beautiful fucking sight?
He gave a few lead-up grunts and then whispered, “Gonna come.” I liked that he warned me, giving me the choice whether to swallow or not; most guys didn’t. But I was good to go, so I sucked harder and faster, and Josh’s body tensed and contracted. His low growl resonated through me as he came. I kept going until he put his fingers beneath my chin to lift me off and up to draw me into a kiss. Man, I could get addicted to this guy. I loved that he wanted to taste himself on me.
He broke the kiss and moved us so we had swapped positions. When he kneeled between my splayed legs and looked up at me as he undid my boardies, I tried to take a mental photograph. The desire in his eyes was a look I wanted to keep forever.
Josh had only just started on me, and I was already trying to hold back. This was going to be embarrassing, but the closer I got, the less I cared. I whispered a warning that I was almost there, and Josh doubled his efforts. I hadn’t even come, and already I wanted more of him.
Chapter 5
JOSH
I WOKE up with the back of Luke’s knee hooked across my lower leg. I looked over at him, and maybe it was because he was so beautiful, but without those expressions that brought him to life, he was merely a shell. I had the urge to wake him to make sure he was real, but there was something niggling at me, and I wanted to have a think about what it was before I was distracted. So when he began to stir, I turned onto my stomach and put my head beneath the pillow. Thankfully he settled down again.
Something didn’t feel quite right. For some weird reason I felt guilty, but why I should feel that way, I didn’t know. Luke and I were both adults, and it wasn’t like either of us had been so drunk we didn’t know what we were doing. I hadn’t coerced him in any way. It even seemed to turn him on when I alerted him to Dan watching.
When I had that thought, there was a twinge in my gut telling me that was where the problem lay, but what exactly was the problem? Okay, so maybe we should have gone to the bedroom before getting into it, but it wasn’t like we made Dan watch, and although I don’t know how long he watched, it was long enough to know he was getting something out of it, but what? Maybe watching two guys get into it turned him on.
Oh shit. I abruptly sat up. Was Dan bi-curious? Was that the weirdness I had been noticing in him since he arrived?
“What? What?” Luke mumbled and sat up.
“Nothing. Go back to sleep.” I moved to sit with my back to him, and there was a “whoof” as he back-flopped onto the mattress.
All those strange looks I’d seen on Dan’s face began making sense, and the other day at Three Bears when he’d been looking at Luke and he turned to me, his face had gone bright red. Did he have a thing for Luke, and I’d gone and slept with him? Fuck.
The sinking feeling told me I had just pinned the tail on the donkey. That would certainly explain him watching last night as well. And putting on our little show had as good as rubbed it in his face. How was I going to fix this?
After the problem circled for a while, I started to formulate a plan. I lay on my side next to Luke, and I could tell by his breathing that he was awake and trying to ease himself into the day before opening his eyes.
He finally lifted his head and glanced at me before letting it drop back to the pillow. “What are you staring at?”
“Hopefully, a way to fix what we fucked up last night.”
His eyes flew open and he lifted his head. “What did we fuck up last night?”
“Our friendship with Dan.”
He frowned before dropping his head back down and rubbing his face. “What do you mean?”
“It’s only just hit me, I think Dan is bi-curious and….”
“At least,” Luke muttered.
That shocked me. “Why do you say that?”
“Dude has sexual energy rolling off him.” Luke turned onto his side to face me as he spoke. “I thought he was gay, but he hasn’t picked up anything I’ve put out there. I thought it was only because he was so into you.”
I laughed. “No on all accounts. He definitely isn’t gay. He’s just come out of a three-year relationship with a chick.”
“Because no gay guy has ever been in a hetero relationship before.” Luke’s statement was a suggestion rather than biting sarcasm, and it got the point across, but….
“We’ve been friends for over a decade. Why would he hide something like that from me? It’s not like I’m going to judge him for it now, is it? He’s been strictly hetero for all that time—well, to my knowledge, anyway.”
Luke shrugged. “If you really want to know, why don’t you ask him?”
“Because I’m pretty sure I already know. The other day I caught him eyeing you off. He’s got a thing for you, and we fucked it last night by getting together.”
“That’s funny because I busted him ogling you. Poor bastard went sunburn red.”
He was eyeing me? Fuck, if only he knew. How the hell was I going to survive this without ruining our friendship? I thought I’d managed to put my feelings for Dan in a box only to be viewed from a distance, but one sentence from Luke, and they were pogoing against the lid of that box. I sighed and rolled onto my back. This was a disaster in the making.
“Hey,” Luke began as he propped himself on his elbow to look at me, “What’s the problem? So what if he’s curious, what’s wrong with that?”
“He’s my best friend is what’s wrong with it.”
Luke finally broke the silence. “Ooookay, you need to tell me what that means because I don’t get it.”
I thought he must have been joking, but when I saw he was serious I tried to consider it from his perspective—there was a gay guy who had a bi-curious friend. Yeah, I could see it wasn’t that problematic. If I wanted his help, I was goi
ng to have to explain, but how did you tell the guy you’d just slept with that you had feelings for someone else? I didn’t even know how to define those feelings.
“Let’s just say sometimes I have a hard time remembering he’s my best friend and not someone to sleep with.”
Luke let himself fall backward off his elbow. “Okay, now I get it.”
I felt like such a heel. “Sorry.”
He looked at me. “Hey, let’s not lie to each other okay? If Dan had taken me up on any of my offers, I’d be with him.” I nodded. That was fair. A slow grin bloomed on his face, and by the time he faced me, it was dazzling, “And in the interest of being honest, I’m just going to put this out there: I’d be with both of you if I could.”
I flicked him with the back of my hand. “You are a dirty bastard.” Images of Dan and Luke began to fill my head. “Oh, fuck! What have you done? Now I can see it!”
He laughed and then waited a moment before he looked down at my groin. “Hmmm, you really can see it, can’t you?”
What could I say? My growing erection made denial useless.
“It would seem we’re in agreement,” said Luke. “How do we get Dan there?”
“Dunno.” I sighed. “But I do know that even if I talk to him about it, I can’t do anything. He has to come to me.”
“Why?”
“Him making a pass at me isn’t going to end our friendship, but me making one at him could. Not only because I don’t have any issues with the whole gay thing, but Dan has a special talent when it comes to messing with his own thinking. Imagine what he could do with mine once he takes it and is left alone with it for a while.”
Luke nodded, “Yeah, I kind of got that. Well, that’s it then.”
“What’s it?”
“I’m going to have to do the heavy lifting on this one.” He grinned. “Poor me.”
As much as I wanted to argue, I couldn’t, not if I wanted to remain friends with Dan. And to be honest with myself, I could endure not being physical with him, but I didn’t know how well I’d go not having him in my life.
“Yeah, well I wouldn’t get too cocky,” I warned. “You haven’t made any progress with him yet. And it’s probably going to be twice as hard now that he thinks we’re together—if he thinks that.” I ran my hand through my hair. Who the hell knew what Dan thought? But then that was one of the things I loved about him: the strange places his mind sometimes went.
“Okay then,” Luke began, “a two-pronged attack. You make sure he knows we are only hooking up, and once that is cemented in his mind, then I’ll make a play for him that he won’t be able to mistake.”
“Luke,” I said. “This isn’t just a game here. Dan is my best friend.”
“Don’t sweat it, Josh. I’m not going to hurt him.”
“You’d better not, or I’ll fucking hunt you down.”
He flashed that dazzling grin again. “Has anyone told you how sexy you are when you’ve gone into Mapa Bear mode?”
I tried not to laugh because I was deadly serious about not hurting Dan, but the whole Mapa Bear thing was ridiculous, so I screwed up my face. “Mapa Bear?”
He shrugged. “I couldn’t remember whether it was the mama or papa bear that was protective.”
“Yeah, well ‘Mapa Bear’ sounds perilously close to Muppet.”
Luke laughed, and the sound called to me on a primal level. “It’s the mothers that are protective,” he said. “So that would make you Mama Bear. Or as I like to call them, Muppet Bear.”
“What does that make you? Pama Bear?”
“Inexperience definitely puts Dan in Baby Bear position for this situation, so I have to be Pama by default.”
“So this is operation Three Bears?”
“Yup.”
The maneuver he pulled had to equal a commando roll, and he ended on top of me. His hands slid into mine, and we linked fingers. “The operation begins when we leave this room,” he said as he lowered his face to mine. “But before we leave… we need to debrief.” He led me into a sensual kiss and ground his growing erection against me.
I grinned. “We did that last night. We also deboardied,” I said between kisses.
“And more,” he said against my lips.
All too quickly the sex was over and my mind barely skipped a beat before returning to the problem with Dan. I was saved from having to admit it when Luke reintroduced the topic. “So how do we play this when we leave the room?”
“Maybe you should leave first, and if Dan’s out there, unless he draws you into a conversation, just leave. I have no idea how he’s going to react to last night.”
“Sounds like a plan. Give me a call, and let me know how it went.” He rose from the bed and began to dress. “I better get home and shower.”
“I would invite you to shower here, but under the circumstances….”
“No worries. I have to swing by my joint on my way to work anyway.”
“What time do you start?”
“Ten minutes ago.” He grinned. “I’ve got a sort of flexi-roster. Jen knows we surfers are unreliable in the morning when surf’s up. So I won’t admit to exactly what I was doing. So long as I don’t make a habit of it, she wouldn’t take strips off me anyway.”
“She sounds like a great boss.”
“She is.” To my surprise he leaned down and kissed me, not exactly something I was used to a hookup doing, but I had to admit, being with Luke didn’t feel like just hooking up. “Talk later.”
“Okay.” One way or another, I suspected we would be seeing a lot of each other. I, for one, wasn’t going to be upset with that prospect.
It was less than a minute before Luke’s car started, so I assumed Dan hadn’t emerged from his bedroom yet. I took the opportunity to jump in the shower and tried to imagine how this might play out. If Dan really was bi-curious and had a thing for Luke, he was more likely to brood than he was to say anything. When he hadn’t come out of his room by ten, I went and knocked on the door, but there was no answer.
“Dan,” I called. Still no answer. I opened the door to find he wasn’t in there. Even though his possessions were in the room, a sense of dread filtered through me. I checked to make sure his car was still in the drive. It was. I went to my phone and texted him.
Where are you?
It was almost ten minutes before an answer came through. Thinking.
Thinking isn’t a place.
Maybe not to you. Yeah, the problem was, thinking really was a place to Dan. A place all of his very own—and the voices of everyone else he had ever heard.
Anything I can help with?
No.
Maybe I could reach him with humor. I think you’re underestimating my amazing problem-solving prowess. While I waited for a response, I went and sat out on the deck. I hoped the delay in his answer meant he was considering confiding in me.
I don’t think it is a solvable problem.
I was about to answer when I saw him sitting under a tree down in the paddock, and I was sure he looked up and saw me on the deck. Not that it mattered. If it was easier for him to do this via text, I could live with that. Although I was fairly sure what we were talking about, I had to be careful not to reveal the assumptions Luke and I had made. Okay, then I guess you have to accept it if it can’t be solved.
He put his elbow on his raised knee and leaned his head into his hand. I could almost feel his internal battle from here. Finally he began to text. The third option is do neither.
Third option? We’d already considered two? Okay. Could you live with that?
The reply came straight away, so not something he had to think about. I have so far.
And you’re okay with that?
Okay with it? No. Able to do it? Maybe.
What if you’re not able to do it any longer? I waited. I watched. His head went back into his hand. I thought I’d try to lighten things and put this into a bit of perspective. You haven’t murdered someone have you?
Not ye
t.
Are you considering it? Maybe I was on the top of his hit list if he thought I’d cockblocked him last night.
No.
You say you’ve lived with it so far, what’s happened to change what you might do with it?
The end of my relationship with Talia? I could hear that guileless sarcasm he spoke with at times.
Couldn’t she live with it?
She doesn’t know.
I wondered if he had met someone else in Sydney that had started all this. Dare I take the opening? If I was right, it could take him years to come to terms with it without prompting. Are you in love with someone else?
I couldn’t see clearly, but it looked like he started texting several times but stopped each time. When the answer came through, it was no less than I expected. He was being super cautious.
Maybe.
You’re not sure, or you don’t want to tell me?
Not sure. At least, I don’t think I am.
I was about to ask whether he wasn’t sure if he was in love or wasn’t sure if he wanted to tell me, but this was Dan I was talking to, which probably meant he was talking about both. The inside of his head must have a thousand boxes, each with how many times he had second-guessed himself. I could see the labeling: “second-guess No: 379”.
Do they know? I was careful to use a neutral pronoun so I didn’t throw him into a quandary of either having to lie or come clean.
No.
Do you want them to know?
Yes and no.
This was a minefield. Should I be flippant, questioning, or straightforward? Why yes, and why no? When I saw Dan set his phone down, my disappointment rose. Too forthright. Shit.
Only time would tell whether he would forgive my miscalculated directness and answer me, or whether he would simply ignore it. Either way, the answer wasn’t going to come back quickly. I went inside to make coffee.
With coffee in hand, I went back onto the deck, and a second after I sat down, my phone pinged.
Yes, because I can dream. No, because reality is never what we wish it to be.
I guess it comes down to whether you’re brave enough to chase your dreams.