by J. Benson
"We don't have to stay long, if you don't want." He shrugged. "I'm not a big party guy, and I'm sure you aren't either... I just thought it might be nice to get out." He seemed almost bashful. It was cute.
"Actually, I'm not having a terrible time." I mused. "I mean, I can think of at least a dozen things that I could be doing that are worse than being here with you." I smiled lightly.
Taylor chuckled. "Wow, I think that's the closest thing to a compliment that I've ever gotten from you."
I laughed. "Yeah, well don't get too used to it. I have to keep insulting you to keep your ego in check." I teased.
Taylor grinned, draining the remainder of his can of coke. "You know what? We should dance." He announced.
I gaped at him in disbelief. "Oh no. No way." I shook my head. "I do not dance." I tried my best to sound stern.
"Sure you do, come on. It's easy. Besides, it's part of the whole date-night package. You have to dance with me. It's practically mandatory." He insisted.
I drew in a deep breath. "I don't know..." I mused.
"Come on." He insisted, leaning on the kitchen island. "Please?"
I pursed my lips and shook my head slowly. "Fine." I sighed.
He grinned hugely, and snatched up my hand, leading me into the living room. The furniture had been shoved into the dining room to make room for a make-shift dance floor. The music was incredibly loud--and I finally found the source of the music. There was a huge stereo system set up in the corner of the room. There were couples gyrating to the music, dancing and grinding.
Before I could say anything further, Taylor twirled me around and pulled me in closer. I laughed, grinning like an idiot. He kept my right hand locked firmly in his and lifted my left hand onto his shoulder. He placed his hand on my hip and pulled me in close.
I smiled at him. "We are entirely off the beat, you know. We look silly, dancing to a fast song like this."
Taylor grinned down at me, his blue eyes sparkling. "What can I say? I dance to every song like this. Every single song." He smiled, reaching up with his left hand. He lightly tucked my hair behind my ear.
"Oh really?" I asked, unable to hide a smile.
"Yup, every single song. Fast, slow, no matter what. I always dance like this." He smirked, pulling me slightly closer.
I shook my head, laughing softly. "I feel silly. I am so bad at dancing."
"Well, you look amazing." He mused. "You're the prettiest girl here."
"See? Now I know that's a lie. A complete lie. You're a lot of things Taylor Green, but I had no idea that you were a liar too." I teased.
"Sorry." I smirked. "I guess I'm just evil." He returned his hand to my hip and quickly turned me around in an elongated spin. When he spun me back around he lightly kissed my right hand and wrapped both my arms around his shoulders.
I chewed the corner of my lower lip and looked down between us. It was suddenly occurring to me how close we were. I felt myself blush. I glanced up at last and noticed that Taylor was silently moving his lips, singing along to the song. He frowned suddenly and stopped singing along to the music.
"What's wrong?" I asked.
"Don't look now, but Paige and her friends just walked in." He mused.
"We should go." I said immediately, dropping my arms from around his shoulders.
Taylor's arms tightened around my waist. "We don't have to go just because she walked in here. We don't have to run from her. She'll be unhappy, and she'll bitch and sulk for a bit, but she'll get over it."
I shook my head, placing my hands on his forearms. "We should go anyway. It's getting late... And I really don't have the energy to fight with her right now. And trust me my social status can't get any lower or more pathetic... not that I particularly care about my social status." I added quickly.
This statement caused Taylor to smirk. "Alright. If you want to go, let's get out of here." He dropped his arms from around my waist, and picked up my hand. He towed me out of the house and onto the front porch. Once we stepped down onto the grass, I wrapped my arms around myself. It had suddenly gotten chilly out, and I had not dressed appropriately.
I nodded slowly, once again aware of how close we were. He took my hand and we began the long walk down the long driveway toward his car.
As we reached the car, Taylor reached inside for something. He produced his leather jacket and slipped it around my shoulders, lightly shifting my hair out of the way. He let my hair slide through his fingers. "Better?" He asked softly.
I glanced around, eying my surroundings. I looked up, mesmerized by the stars and the massive moon overhead.
"Wow," I breathed. "I can't remember the last time I saw the stars." I mused, smiling in spite of myself. It seemed like such a small and insignificant thing, but it was something I missed when living in the city.
"Really?" Taylor asked, frowning. "You can't see the stars in New York?"
I shook my head. "No, you can never see the stars in the city. There's too much pollution and the lights are always too bright. It's refreshing... and pretty." I mused.
I stood waiting while he searched the pockets of his jeans for his car keys. For some strange reason, Taylor had locked his car doors but had left the back windows open. This was something that would be unheard of in New York City. I guess cars weren't stolen as often in Tulsa as they were in New York.
I glanced up at the stars again.
"Excuse me for a second." He said, reaching into the pockets of his leather jacket, which I was still wearing.
"Do you want your jacket back?" I asked, secretly hoping he would say no. I was chilly and the jacket smelled so much like him.
"Nope." He smirked, holding up the keys triumphantly.
I laughed. "You are absolutely hilarious." I shook my head.
He unlocked the car door and held open the passenger's side door for me, holding it while I slid into the seat. He shut the door behind me. I grinned to myself, and tucked my hair behind my ear. I forced my smile away. The last thing I wanted was for Taylor to see that I was actually having a good time. I didn't want him to somehow miraculously blackmail me into a second date.
Taylor climbed into the driver's seat and fastened his seatbelt. I fastened mine. "Hold on." He announced before doing a sharp U-turn out of the driveway.
The car fell into silence for a few minutes, with nothing but the sound of the radio playing softly.
Taylor sighed heavily. "I'm sorry we had to cut our date short." He said suddenly.
"It's not that short." I mused. "It's almost eleven. I mean, I can't stay out all night. I'm sure your parents would kill you if you stayed out much later."
Taylor smirked crookedly. "Yeah, but it would be worth it."
I shook my head, laughing softly. "I really don't mind. I mean, it saves a huge argument. And besides, I definitely don't need any more trouble from that girl." I mused.
"Any more trouble?" He asked with a frown. "What did she do?"
"Oh, nothing..." I said lightly. "She just hit me with a volleyball in gym class while my back was turned."
Taylor raised his eyebrows. "Wow. That's classy... actually, that's fairly typical of her, though. She's petty and immature like that."
"She wants attention and to get a reaction out of me. Frankly, I'm far too mature, and I'm not going to give her what she wants." I replied.
"I knew you would be. But if she does anything else like that, let me know. I'll talk to her." He replied.
"Right, like I need you to fight my battles." I replied, sarcastically.
"No, you definitely don't. You have enough attitude that you can handle things on your own." He said with a sly grin. "But I might just know enough of her secrets to give you some decent leverage." He smirked.
I laughed, shaking my head.
"Do you want to stop for coffee or anything before I drop you back at your grandmother's house?" He asked. He casually reached across the front seat and picked up my hand in his. The way he took my hand, it was casual. Like
something he did every day. He played with my fingers lightly.
I drew in a deep breath. "I would absolutely love a cup of coffee right now..." I mused, "But... I do have to sleep some time. And if I drink coffee now, I'll be up all night." I said with a smile.
"Yeah, I guess that could be a problem." He replied with a smile.
I laughed softly. "I really should get home. I bet you any money that my grandmother has been waiting up for me."
"Really? She would worry about you that much?" He asked.
"No," I laughed, tucking my hair behind my ear with my free hand. "But she would wait up for me just to ask how my night went. She'll want all of the details."
"What are you going to say?" He asked.
"Well, I'll start off telling her that I had a horrible evening, and how much of an asshole you've been all night long." I replied, struggling to keep a straight face.
"Really? That hardly seems fair." He frowned.
I laughed softly, nudging his arm. "Of course I wouldn't say that. I actually didn't have too bad of a time tonight. Believe me, I've had worse." I answered.
"I'll take that as a compliment too." He replied smugly.
"I figured you would." I laughed softly, shaking my head.
Taylor stopped at a stop sign and turned toward town. He picked up speed, as he drove along the country roads in the darkness.
"Do you miss New York at all?" Taylor asked suddenly.
I smiled lightly, a distant placid smile. "Yeah. I do. I mean, I don't miss what New York represents or anything. I don't miss all of the problems that I ran away from... but I miss the city. Tulsa is just so.... Quiet." I mused.
"Tulsa is not quiet." Taylor laughed. "It's a city. It's the second largest city in the state." He replied.
"But it's nothing compared to New York." I replied.
"I've always wanted to go there." He replied. "New York, I mean. I think it would be amazing to see. The people and the buildings and the reputation. You know the city that never sleeps. I think it would be amazing to experience."
"As soon as I finish high school, I'm going to get a job and move back there." I replied, glancing out the passenger side window.
"Really? You're not going to stay here with your Grandmother? You guys seem to get along so well."
"We do. I love my grandma. But I feel like such an interruption in her life. I mean, she's so busy. I just feel like I'm in the way all of the time." I shrugged.
"No way. She loves having you around." Taylor insisted.
"She keeps telling me that... but I know I'm putting a damper on her social life. I know it. And she's been so good to me, the last thing I want is to get in her way and keep her from doing the things she loves doing." I replied earnestly.
Taylor stopped at a red light and when it turned green, he turned toward town. The houses started getting closer and closer together, and I knew we were inside the city limits. After a few minutes, I began to recognize my surroundings and I knew we were getting closer to my Grandmother's house.
It meant our date was nearly over. And I wasn't entirely sure how I felt about that.
But a large part of me felt saddened by the fact that soon I was going to have to say goodnight.
Chapter 24:
Sneaking Back
Taylor followed me up the front steps and onto my grandmother's front porch. His hands were shoved deep into his pockets. He was being oddly quiet, which was uncharacteristic of him.
The house was dark, and the curtains were drawn. There were no lights on in the living room, which meant grandma had gone to bed. The night had turned suddenly cool, but even in the city it seemed quiet. The night air was still.
I dug for my house keys in my purse, almost wishing my grandmother had waited up for me. That would have given me the perfect excuse to get off the porch and end this awkward date with Taylor.
Taylor stood next to me on the porch, watching me root around in my purse for my keys. "You were right..." I said reluctantly. "I did have a good time tonight." I smiled.
A bright grin flashed across his face, his entire demeanor brightening. "See? I told you!"
I rolled my eyes, but couldn't keep myself from laughing softly. "Alright, no need to gloat." I teased.
He chuckled softly. "Sorry."
We stood in awkward silence for what seemed like an eternity.
"So, umm... I guess I'll see you in school on Monday." I said slowly, desperate to break the awkward silence.
I looked up from the floorboards of the porch deck and saw Taylor stepping toward me; I held my breath, suddenly unsure of how to react to his sudden proximity.
Before I could say anything, he reached out and drew his arms around me, pulling my body closer to his.
Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. I couldn't speak; my breath was caught in my throat.
"Please don't." I whispered dryly, the words coming out with my breath involuntarily.
Taylor's bright blue eyes flashed with confusion, but his gaze never left my mouth. "Why not?" He asked gently.
My mind raced, trying to come up with a reason. I knew that no matter what happened right at this moment, it wasn't going to end well. But the fact was I wanted him to kiss me.
His lips inched closer to mine.
"I don't want to get hurt again." I murmured softly. My heart was drumming loudly in my chest.
"I won't hurt you, I promise." The corners of his lips turned up in a small smile.
I slowly sucked in my breath, waiting for the inevitable.
When his lips touched mine there was a certain and undeniable spark. Like a flame lit from within my chest that sputtered and came roaring to life. There was a jolt of electricity that shocked me from the inside out, and within mere moments there was a warmth and a steady beating of my heart that I hadn't felt in months. I felt alive again after months of feeling physically numb and emotionally dead.
And it was all do to his sudden and unexpected kiss.
My hands moved up between us, and I placed my palms flat on his chest, ready to push him away. His arms tightened around me, flattening my body against his. I couldn't push him away any longer, there was something clicking in my brain. There was something so sweet and perfect about this.
Something deep down inside was telling me that this was right.
My hands slowly slid up to his shoulders, my fingers moved into his shaggy blond locks. His hair was as soft as silk, and wound its way between my fingers.
My lips parted and I stood on my toes, subconsciously urging him to kiss me deeper. I felt his hand on my lower back slowly release and our kiss parted.
The air I'd been holding in my lungs came out all at once, but sounded more like a placid, contented sigh. I felt my cheeks get even hotter, and I could feel the blush and color my face.
Taylor swallowed thickly, his Adam's apple bobbing in his throat. I pursed my lips tightly.
Taylor's eyebrows knitted together slightly, his eyes never leaving my lips. His head tilted to the side and he leaned down a second time; his lips touching mine. This time I returned his kisses eagerly, his body was warm against mine, and I felt things I'd never experienced before.
He was sweet, and gentle, and an amazing kisser. His body moved against mine, and when the kiss broke, a cold wind ran through me.
I stood staring at him with wide, shocked eyes.
Taylor grinned. It was a sly, crooked smile. "Well, that-" He began slowly.
I shook my head. "No, don't say anything. Just shut up for a second." I interrupted rudely.
Taylor frowned in confusion.
His mouth opened again to respond, but I interrupted him immediately, by standing on my toes and kissing his lips. My mouth moved quickly over his lower lip. I stepped toward him, pressing my body against his. Once he finally overcame the shock of what I had done, he pulled me close and moved his hands slowly around my back. His arms were strong and firm around my body, holding me gently but protectively all at the same time.
His lips danced expertly against mine.
I dropped my hands from his hair and let them hang limply at my sides, suddenly realizing what I had done. I had made a huge mistake.
His eyes seemed slightly darker than usual, and I instantly regretted getting carried away.
"I.... I'm sorry..." I whispered and backed away quickly into the front door, closing it and locking it behind me. I leaned against the door and heaved a heavy sigh. I reached up and lightly touched my lips in disbelief.
I locked the door behind me, and waited until I saw the headlights from his car shine through the living room window as he backed from the driveway. I finally deemed it safe enough to go upstairs and go to bed.
Grandma's bedroom light was off, and I could hear her inside snoring softly. I grabbed my bag of toiletries and my pajamas before trudging off toward the bathroom. I changed into a pair flannel pajama shorts and a tank top before I brushed my teeth and hair. I swept my long dark hair into a pony-tail and sighed, examining myself in the mirror.
As I slowly removed the make-up from my face, I silently cursed myself. I had done the one thing I swore I wouldn't do. I let someone in. A part of me knew that on Monday morning the whole school would know what happened between Taylor and me. The whole school would be laughing at my expense, and I had no one to blame but myself.
However, on the other hand, as far as first kisses had gone, my first kiss had to break some sort of record.
I sighed and turned off the light, tip-toeing back into my bedroom.
I turned off the overhead light, and turned on the lamp next to my bed. It was well after midnight, but I doubted I'd be able to sleep. Reading seemed like a viable option. I pulled the blankets up and over my knees, and just as I was settling back against my pillows, there was a soft knock at my window.
I frowned, crawling toward the foot of my bed. I peered out my window to see that Taylor was sitting on the branch a foot or so from my window.
"Taylor!" I hissed. I moved toward the window and opened it as far as I could. The house was old, and my window stuck stubbornly.
"Taylor, what the hell are you doing here?" I demanded in a hushed tone.