When I slid back under the sheets, I tucked her closer. “Gracias.”
Chapter 19
“LOVE WHAT YOU’VE DONE WITH THE PLACE,” Mom said.
I tilted my head. “Really?”
“Yes!” She pointed to the space beneath my lofted bed, where I’d hung a string of white lights that reflected off the silver and blue of the mermaid girl. “Patrick’s painting looks remarkable.”
Dad grinned.
“And living in the dorm is an important part of college life, you’re right,” Mom said. “Much better than off campus with Dane.”
The thumping hip-hop music from my neighbor’s room made me doubt that. Mackenzie had just left for the library after meeting my parents, but if she’d been here she would’ve busted into a kinetic tribal dance, shimmying in front of her favorite football player. I would’ve probably joined her and laughed my butt off. She and I had been a lot freer with each other since sharing what we’d been through.
Looking in the mirror, I fiddled with my hair as my mother lowered herself onto the loveseat under my bed. Dad stood near my desk, flipping through my art history textbook.
To show my school spirit for Lucia’s volleyball match later tonight, I pulled the sides of my hair back into a maroon barrette with a cougar design. Highbanks was about to host the NCAA finals, which made it fortuitous that the home school had qualified. I’d never seen Dane so nervous.
“You sure you have time for the game tonight?” Dad asked me.
“I told you I’m done with all my finals.”
He shook his head. “But it’s only December eighth. Finals just started. I’d be pulling all-nighters by this part of the semester.”
I shrugged. “Can’t pull all-nighters and make morning swim practice. I had to work ahead on my projects.”
“Unbelievable.” Dad smirked at Mom. “She gets that drive from you, Lois.”
Mom’s frown made it appear she didn’t take that as a compliment.
“I’m going to make this work.” I dabbed some pressed powder on my nose. “Nobody thinks I can major in art and swim. I know I can do it, though.”
“That’s a great attitude, honey.” Mom’s eyes were still tight. “But make sure you have some fun along the way. You seemed so stressed out whenever we talked this semester.”
I swallowed. I hadn’t mustered the courage to tell them about Blake, despite Dr. Valentine’s encouragement. “I do have fun.” I turned to my parents. “Mateo makes me laugh all the time.” Our recent euchre victory over Dane and Lucia came to mind, bringing with it a smile.
“Seems rather serious between you two,” Mom said.
Maybe it was serious. And awesome. And thrilling. I didn’t even care that the press hounded me almost every time I went to the greenhouse. Being greeted by Mateo’s shy smile and soft kisses made it worth it.
“You haven’t had much time to get to know him,” she added. “You might want to slow things down.”
I scowled at her.
“Associating with the son of the president carries a high price. I’ve already put our family in the limelight, but you’re ripping away all privacy when you’re with Mateo. Fame steals freedom.”
“I’d hardly say I’m famous.” I applied the orange-flavored lip gloss Mateo loved.
“But Mateo is. And signing a record deal will only multiply his fame.”
My lips parted. Mateo had just learned about a record label showing interest a couple of days ago. Itch had almost had a coronary.
“How’d you know about that?”
“Jessie.” Dad lowered his chin. “Your mother gets national security briefings daily. Of course she knows that.”
Duh. And she’d also found out about Blake’s arrest soon after it had happened. I’d played it cool when she’d called and asked if anyone besides Mackenzie had been affected on my team. At least Mom hadn’t brought up the subject with Mackenzie earlier.
“Dane dates a Ramirez, too. Do you ask him these questions?”
“Dane’s a lost cause. He’s closing off his options too early. I can’t believe he…” Her voice faded off. “Anyway, he’s a senior, about to graduate. You just turned nineteen.”
With all that had happened this semester, I felt way older than that.
“You’re going to grow and develop and change. Don’t tether yourself to one boy—”
“Tether myself?” The word disgusted me.
Mom noticed my grimace and held up her hand. “Sorry, that came out wrong. What I’m trying to say is choosing a partner’s a big deal. Committing to someone with a life-long health condition…”
When my jaw unhinged, she shut up. “His diabetes? You’re holding that against him? Something that’s completely not his fault?”
Dad set the book on my desk and joined Mom on the loveseat. When he reached for her hand, she sighed.
“Maybe that’s unfair, but look at the statistics, Jessica. Mateo may be fine now, but down the road he has a higher risk of blindness, neuropathy, stroke…”
“He’s got the best health care there is, and he takes good care of himself.” I folded my arms across my chest. “And I’m not perfect, either.”
Dad’s eyebrows pulled together. “What’re you talking about, Jessie? Any guy would be lucky to have you.”
“If anything, I’m the lucky one. Teo’s been there for me.” A lump lodged in my throat. “I don’t know if I would’ve made it without him.”
“What do you mean?” Mom searched my eyes. When I pressed my lips together so I wouldn’t start crying, she looked across the room at Mackenzie’s posters. Mom tapped her chin. “What Mackenzie went through had to be rough on you. I knew I should’ve visited when I heard what that monster did to her.”
Damn it. I hadn’t cried in weeks, but here came the waterworks.
“Oh honey, I’m sorry,” Mom said. “I should’ve been here.”
Dad stood and pushed my desk chair closer to the loveseat. Then he rubbed my shoulder and guided me into the chair.
I sniffed. “It’s okay you weren’t here. I’m not crying because of that.”
“Then what’s making you upset?” Dad asked.
I frowned. “I hate you saying mean things about Teo.”
“Mean?” Mom said.
I realized how juvenile I’d sounded. How could I make them understand what he meant to me? I drew in a breath. “He’s not just some boy I have a crush on. He’s more than that. We’ve been through a lot together.”
Mom’s eyes narrowed. “Please don’t tell me you’re pregnant.”
Dad’s eyes got huge.
Despite my tears, I barked out a laugh. My hand darted to my mouth as I kept snickering. My mother was a big believer in birth control, but I hadn’t told her I’d started taking the pill a month ago. “Um, no. I’m not preggers.”
Dad looked upward in apparent relief.
Blake could’ve gotten me pregnant, though. The thought killed my laughter in a second. Thank God my HIV test had recently come back negative as well. “Mateo helped me.” I exhaled. “He helped me heal from a trauma.”
My psychologist mother sat up—I knew that would get her attention. “What trauma?”
I glanced at Mackenzie’s side of the room, then back at my parents. “Blake Morrell.” I was proud my voice didn’t shake when I said his name. But the lump in my throat hardened as I watched Mom’s chin quiver. She shrank back on the loveseat. She’d heard too many horror stories from her psychotherapy clients, and she probably knew what was coming.
“Mackenzie wasn’t his first victim.”
Dad was slower on the uptake. “What are you saying?”
Mom leaned forward and took my hand, which made me start crying again. “He…he drugged you?”
It was difficult to speak. “I think so.”
Dad gasped and took my other hand. “Oh, God, Jessie.”
“Did he…?” Mom had begun crying, too.
Could my parents handle it? Dr. Valentine had
said they could, but I wasn’t so sure. I was about to find out. “He raped me.”
“Son of a bitch.” Mom closed her eyes, and tears squeezed out.
Dad clutched my hand. “I’m so sorry.”
“I’m doing much better now.” I didn’t have a hand free to wipe my nose, so I sniffed. “I’ve been meeting with the sport psychologist—”
“Carly Valentine?” Mom exhaled when I nodded. “She’s been so good for Dane. Did he tell you to see her?”
I swallowed. “I sort of got mandated to see her. For a positive drug test.” Mom’s eyes widened, and before she could ask more, I added, “Blake gave me a joint that night. I shouldn’t have smoked it.” Just like I shouldn’t have accepted that drink from him.
“When did this happen?” Dad asked.
I looked down. “The first night I was here.”
Mom let go of my hand as her voice rose. “And you’re just telling us now? Over three months later?”
“Lois.” Dad frowned at her.
“Sorry.” I blinked. “It took me a while to figure out what happened. I…I couldn’t remember, and then when pieces of it came back to me, I didn’t want anyone to know.”
Mom blew out a breath. “That’s the shame talking. But this isn’t your fault.”
“I know that, Mom.” I hid a smile. What a shrink response.
“You’re having nightmares? Flashbacks? Hypervigilance?”
More psychologist questions. “Not any more. I got some things off my chest when I wrote him a letter, even though I didn’t send it. Then, when he got arrested, it was like a load off my shoulders.”
Mom studied me. “I haven’t heard anything about you making a police report.”
“I don’t have to. I was with Mateo when we found out Blake was about to hurt Mackenzie, and Johnny made sure she was okay. Then Johnny told Blake that whatever happened with the charges against him, Secret Service would watch him for the rest of his life.”
Mom’s eyes grew round. “Wow. Johnny did that?”
“Yeah. And when Blake’s arrest got out, two other athletes came forward. Elyse and I got them connected with Dr. Valentine—I hope they’ll be okay, like me. I’m ready to put this behind me. I thought about reporting, but the media would go crazy if they found out who I was. It’d draw way too much attention to you and Dad.”
“Jessica.” Mom sighed. “This is exactly what I was saying about fame. Don’t let our family’s stature dictate how you live your life.”
“But Mom, I don’t want to make a report. The only reason I would is so Blake can’t hurt anyone else. Johnny made sure he won’t.”
Mom shook her head. “He’s done so much for our family. I have to say that having Johnny near you is a definite bonus of dating Mateo.”
“So Mateo knows what happened to you?” Dad asked.
“He figured it out. He listens to me. He cares about me. He’s been so amazing—he’s really helped me. I don’t think about Blake much at all anymore, especially when I’m with Teo.”
Mom assessed me. “You do seem rather calm about the whole thing. You must’ve done some good work in therapy.”
I leaned back. That was one of the nicest things my mother had ever said to me. “Thanks. But I wouldn’t be here without Teo. He’s so kind and smart. And have you heard him sing?” I pressed my hand to my heart. “Dios, his voice takes you to a different place.”
After a beat, Dad chuckled, and Mom exchanged a look with him. Her eyes tapered.
I wrinkled my nose. “What?”
“Don’t say it.” Mom held up her hand.
Dad smirked. “Our daughter has found love.”
“Ugh.” Mom looked to the ceiling.
“How is love a bad thing?” I demanded.
Mom rubbed her temples. “It’s been so difficult not saying anything to Dane about Lucia’s politics. Two whole years I’ve kept my mouth shut. What helped me get through was hoping you’d find a nice liberal boy. Or girl. Now those hopes are dashed.”
“I’m not gay, Mom.”
Her mouth turned down at one corner. “You sure?”
“You’d rather me be gay than with a Ramirez?”
Dad laughed. “Every parent has dreams for their child.” He squeezed my hand. “I know we can’t control who we fall in love with. I wouldn’t have chosen the daughter of a real estate mogul as my first pick.” He let go of my hand and caressed Mom’s cheek. “But I’m so glad I did. And grateful she gave me another chance when I fucked it all up.”
Mom seemed to soften as she looked in his eyes. “The real estate mogul wasn’t thrilled when I fell for the poor artist.” She kissed his hand. “But I was.”
They looked like they were about to christen my loveseat. Evidently they’d taken my news better than expected. “Um, do I have to see this?”
Mom grinned at me and got to her feet, with Dad not far behind. “Group hug!” she hollered. I scoffed at the idea. But when we held each other, I closed my eyes and said a silent thank you to my psychologist for nudging me to tell my parents. No more secrets—only relief. It was over.
Mateo lit up when we made our way to the roped-off seating area in the arena. There were countless Secret Service agents mingling with the First Family and their entourage, and likely many more I couldn’t see. My boyfriend, followed by Johnny, came up to us.
“Good to see you, Mateo.” Mom shook his hand.
Mateo fidgeted. “You too, Senator Monroe.”
Dad reached out to shake his hand, but instead drew in Mateo for a hug. “Thank you,” Dad said before he let him go.
“Uh, sure.” Mateo looked at me with questions in his eyes.
We’d picked up Dane on our way to the arena, and Mateo fist-bumped him. Dane gave him a shaky smile. “Yo, Teo.”
“Lucy’s going to play great,” Mateo told him.
Dane exhaled. “My nerves are that obvious, huh?” He looked down at the teams warming up. “Typically I’d do a few jump serves and get it out of my system. This spectator thing sucks balls.”
“It’s not so bad.” Mateo gestured to the stands. “We have some seats for you over here by my parents.” He rested his hand on my back, right where I liked it, and guided me in that direction. “You look incredible,” he whispered.
His touch zinged tingles up my spine.
As we passed Johnny, I smiled at him. He aimed the faintest of smiles back at me while maintaining his professional façade. He then looked behind me and nodded at my parents. “Senator Monroe, Mr. DuPont.”
I heard Mom tell him, “We owe you.”
Dane reached Alejandro and his fiancée first. I’d only seen photos of Maddie, and she looked even prettier in real life. Her defined jaw and muscular body conveyed her athletic talent, but her full lips and high cheekbones competed with runway models’. I liked her curly hair, too. She and Alejandro made a striking couple.
“How’s my groomsman’s foot?” Alejandro asked Dane as they shook hands. His wedding was only one week away.
Dane nodded. “Stronger than ever. Ready to kill it on the dance floor.”
“So modest,” Maddie said with a grin. She perched on her tiptoes to hug Dane.
Alejandro smiled at me. “So this is the girl Matty can’t stop talking about.”
Mateo draped his arm across my shoulders. “Jess, this is Alex and Maddie.”
“Hi.” I gave a little wave, which made Maddie laugh.
“How’s the national team?” Dane asked Maddie as he sat next to her.
Mateo and I squeezed between my parents and Alejandro. Then the announcer told us to rise. Mom and Dad stopped chatting with Mateo’s parents to stand for the national anthem.
I smiled when I saw Elyse and Josh together across the arena. They’d been dating over a month now, and I was proud I’d had a role in bringing them together.
The music started, and I nudged Mateo. “Will you sing?”
He lifted his hand to cover his heart and smirked at me. “No.”
He pursed his lips. “You drive a hard bargain, chica.” He began to sing the second verse.
That low, smooth voice made my legs clench. Was it hot in here?
“We should’ve had you sing the national anthem, Mr. Record Deal,” Alejandro told Mateo after we took our seats.
“Nah, this is Lucy’s night. Besides, ‘The Star Spangled Banner’ is tough! My instructor said I’m not ready for that kind of range yet.”
So modest. And I wasn’t being sarcastic.
Mateo held my hand during the team introductions. “Did you know Wrigley Field was the first place they sang ‘The Star Spangled Banner’ at a sporting event?”
“Nope. Fitch told you that, huh?”
“Along with five hundred other useless facts about the Cubs.” He shook his head. “Wrigley’s also the first ballpark to let fans keep the foul balls they catch.”
“…but military spending is way up,” my mother said.
I looked over to see her and President Ramirez deep in discussion.
“ISIS has given us no choice,” he said. “They’re every bit as dangerous as the Nazis. You’ve seen what they’ve done to women, Lois. This is a human rights issue. We have to stop them.”
“Not at the expense of poor and disabled Americans,” Mom countered.
“Despite ramping up the military, we’ve decreased the national debt for the first time in years. That’ll help the economy, which in turn will help the poor.”
She shook her head. “Americans are suffering from these insane budget cuts.”
“We all have to sacrifice to rein in massive government spending. You’re right,” he said.
“I don’t see any sacrifice when it comes to funding your juggernaut military.”
The referee’s whistle brought me back to the reason we were here. I looked to my left to find Mateo watching me.
“Sorry,” he whispered.
“For what?”
He cringed. “My dad gets kind of heated.”
“Like my mom doesn’t? They disagree on everything.”
“Hopefully they’ll agree about us being together.”
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