by Rina Kent
When I heard the strangled noise coming from the ally, I didn’t hesitate to come and check. Perhaps it’s because of the officer side in me. Or the foolish side.
I hadn’t realised that it was some battle between Shadow and whoever this man is.
Before I could retreat and call for help, I got caught.
I try to remain calm like how they taught us in the forces.
Never provoke a captor.
It’s the only thing that’s filtering into my agitated mind as I force myself to remain still.
My gaze strays to Shadow. I expected him to be at least half my panic mode, but he’s completely calm. Blood soaks the white of his T-shirt, but his shoulders are relaxed and his overcast eyes are unreadable. There’s no tension or alarm whatsoever. It’s like he doesn’t give a damn that someone is holding a knife to my throat.
Then it hits me.
He probably doesn’t. Why would he care whether I live or die?
The thought fills my throat with a bitter taste. For the past few weeks, he’s been getting under my skin. Through our constant push and pull, I thought he might have a smudge of the care I have for him. When in reality, I’m probably a toy he kills time with.
I’m such a fool.
I widen my eyes and breathe through my nose. If I want to survive this, then I need to remain calm.
My gaze darts sideways searching for something I can use. The alley is full of rubbish. The nauseating smell of human waste worsens the clogging of my throat.
With the firm hold this man has over me, I can’t breathe properly, let alone search for a weapon.
Think, think...
The books!
My grip tightens around them. They aren’t that heavy, but they can strike some damage.
“She’s a civilian,” Shadow says with nonchalance, but I sense the hint of tension beneath.
I stare at him, and there’s the slight clench of his jaw underneath the stubble covering his cheeks.
Confusion turns my brain to butter. Does Shadow care or not? This is about the worst time he’s impossible to read.
“Drop your knife,” my captor says in a dead, detached voice.
Who is he anyway? What does he want from Shadow? Then again, it shouldn’t be a surprise. Someone like Shadow ought to have enemies.
My attention zeroes on the slash in Shadow’s shoulder. Blood soaks the white cloth in a sickening bright red. Is he badly hurt?
“I’ll hear you out.” Shadow grins, but I can tell it’s one of his fake ones. “Go on, cockroach. What do you and Team Ink want?”
“You on the inside.” My captor’s voice is firm. “Ink outside. You will volunteer to go back to The Pit. Otherwise, Hades won’t accept.”
Shadow barks a long laugh, and it’s more biting than anything. I’m confused by the whole thing. Ink. Hades. The Pit. What the hell is all that supposed to mean?
Shadow’s laugh stops abruptly and his face morphs into undecipherable lines. “Do you take ‘delusional’ drug?”
“I know your secret.” My captor deadpans.
That seems to have struck a chord because Shadow’s lips pull in his widest, fakest grin. It seems that the more he’s agitated, the harder he fakes his smiles. Sort of like me.
“Is that so?”
“Drop your knife.” My captor is calm and cold. “Come with me or I’ll kill her. ”
Dread seeps under my skin like a viral disease. No idea what the hell they’re talking about, but I’m apparently going to be the sacrifice of this encounter.
If there’s anything I learnt about Shadow then it’s his selfishness. There’s no way in hell he’ll sacrifice himself for anyone. Let alone me.
My mind crowds with ideas to use the books. If I jam them back, my captor might be faster and cut my throat. If I duck and throw —
My thoughts are interrupted. Shadow does something that shocks the hell out of me. He bends down and places his knife on the ground. His eyes meet mine during the act. They’re not indifferent. If anything... concern turns his gaze gunmetal.
Is he worried about me?
He’s still smirking, but his eyes shift to the right. Once. Twice. I wouldn’t have noticed it if I haven’t been closely watching him.
He’s giving me a message.
Move to the right, I think. No. I’m sure.
It happens in seconds. Shadow nods. I elbow my captor in the kidney and rear to the side. I close my eyes, half expecting that he sliced me and I’ll find myself bleeding to death.
I open my eyes. No blood.
Before I can breathe in relief, the sight in front of me ices my veins.
Shadow is looming behind my captor. The man is barely in his early to mid-twenties — about my age. Shadow’s knife is lodged deep in his throat.
He doesn’t stop there.
He jerks the knife back. A fountain of blood splashes on Shadow, soaking him in a red bath. The man gurgles on his own blood. The sound is scratchy, haunting, and so full of… death.
Hot liquid covers my skin. Over my face. Inside my nose. Down my arms. All over the books in my hands.
All I can breathe is the nauseating, metallic taste.
Everything is bloody.
His hands.
His soul.
His heart.
I’m too frozen to move or to think, caught by the monster in Shadow’s face. I always said he was one, but now, I get the proof first hand.
There are no feelings on his features.
He slaughtered someone without even blinking. His eyes might as well be black holes.
No life.
No remorse.
No… nothing.
This isn’t his first kill. And it’s probably not his last.
He’s a killer. Mum’s voice rings in my head like a haunting squeak. Killers can only kill. He’ll ruin us both, Zoe.
Run.
A ringing buzzes in my ears in a long, deep shrill. Sweat trickles down my rigid back. My throat closes and so do my lungs.
I can’t breathe.
I can’t breathe.
Panic surges to the front of my mind. I try to take calming breaths. To think of something happier.
It doesn’t work.
I didn’t even feel this way when that man was holding a knife to my neck.
He’s now dead. Because Shadow killed him.
I screw my eyes shut, not wanting to look at his monstrous form.
That doesn’t stop the panic attack. My skin prickles as if being drenched in lava. The books must’ve dropped from my arms because I register the thud. I fall back, my bottom hitting the asphalt. Abhorrent memories flash behind my lids.
Blurry images.
Distorted voices.
Mismatched colours of black and white.
Forceful hands shove me away, saving me. My mum. She saved me while my father wanted to asphyxiate us.
He’s a killer, Zoe. He kills children like you in Afghanistan.
Your father is a rapist and a murderer.
Don’t come near!
I love you, petal.
Small hands reach for her. My hands. I taste the salt of my tears. “Mummy…”
Stay away!
Run, Zoe. Run!
“Zoe!”
My eyes snap open with a gasp. The view in front of me is worse than those disordered memories. Shadow is crouching and clutching my shoulders as if he were shaking me. His shirt is sticking to his chest with blood and his face is splashed in red. He’s like a demon who came out to play.
A murderer. Just like my father.
“Don’t touch me!” My voice is hysterical as I jerk up and wiggle free. Thankfully, he lets me go.
“What’s wrong with you?” His brows furrow.
All I see is my dad’s face. His brows also furrowed every time he talked to my mother. He never liked talking to her. Then, he had enough talking and killed her.
I always wanted to forget my dad, but now that I look closer, he also had Shadow’s e
yes. That stormy, frightening colour is the same.
Even his dark blond hair with the slightest curls is the same.
He’s the same.
“Murderer!” I shout, tears streaming down my face. “Killer! Monster!”
He runs a hand through his blood-soaked hair. “Fuck this. I just saved you.”
“So you would kill me!” I hit his chest over and over.
Images of Mum’s dead eyes stab my mind and I can only imagine myself as her.
No matter what I do, I’ll always be her.
“Enough!” Shadow grabs both my hands in his and softens his voice. “Calm down, Zoe.”
I continue hitting him with blows as sporadic and chaotic as I feel.
He accepts my blows, over and over. Then he clutches my shoulders firmly, but also gently. His voice is soothing. “Breathe, Zoe. You need to calm down.”
Dad said those same words before to Mum. You need to calm down, Renee. Stop being hysterical, Renee.
Then he killed her.
I kick him fast and hard. Once he releases me, I don’t think.
I run.
Far away from that monster.
Far away from being another version of Mum.
Chapter Fifteen
I end up in Le Salon.
I sit in Mist’s office, shaking and with blood all over me. She came to mind as the only person who can help me.
There’s no way I’ll get Liam or Elle involved in this. I have no doubt that Shadow won’t hesitate to hurt them to get to me. I’d rather die than expose them to any type of danger.
Mist sits across from me instead of her usual position behind her desk. She’s wearing an elegant, navy blue dress. Her dark red hair is gathered in a French twist that accentuates her high cheekbones.
She offers me wet wipes and waits patiently while I scrub off my face and hands. I’m still trembling all over, but I need this blood off me.
The sound of that man’s gurgles still echoes in my ears like a haunting ghost. It takes everything in me not to break down in tears.
“What did he do?” Mist asks softly but firmly. She obviously doesn’t want to push me, but she also needs answers.
That’s what we were taught to do in psychological classes when dealing with victims. I never thought I’d be on the receiving end.
I try to subdue my shaking hands and fail. “Did you know he’s a killer?”
“I see.” She doesn’t appear the least bit fazed as her red-manicured fingers tap her arm. “I’m sorry you had to witness that.”
“You knew?” My voice rises.
“We all are, Zoe,” she admits with ease.
No.
She didn’t just say that.
They’re all killers? They’re in the mafia so it shouldn’t be a surprise that they kill, but are they all as cold-blooded as Shadow?
Her voice is smooth and firm as she continues, “Since you know about us, what do you think will happen to you?”
I jerk to my feet and slowly back away towards the door. Mist doesn’t move. She’s still crossing her arms and sitting leisurely. I keep my gaze on her as I reach back, clutch the doorknob, and twist.
No idea where I’m going after this, but I need to run from these people as far away as possible.
I turn around, but my head collides against a strong chest. Julian’s dark, cold eyes bore into mine.
He’s one of them, too. A killer. A murderer.
Since I’m cornered, the flight mode is impossible.
Fight it is.
My stance widens and so do my arms. Energy buzzes into my veins until I taste the euphoria of adrenaline. If I’m dying then it’s with honour.
“Relax, Zoe.” Julian’s voice is calm. Composed. As if he’s a wise professor lecturing his student.
“I don’t think so.” I push back so I’m a safe distance from him and Mist.
Julian closes the door and steps inside. “We ran an extensive background check on you.”
“You were smart.” There’s a smile in Mist’s voice coming from behind me. “We almost didn’t find your record.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” I step sideways as Julian strides to where Mist is and stands beside her chair.
Julian rolls the cuffs of his shirt, exposing sketch-like tattoos snaking up his hands and arms. He always gave lethal vibes, but it’s his next words undo me. “We know you’re from the police.”
This is it. They’ll kill me now.
I bolt to the door, my heart on overdrive. Tears blur my eyes. All I could think about is that I endangered Liam and Elle’s lives. If they ran a background check on me, they’d know about them. I have to disappear to not put their lives in danger.
Elle and Liam will both have a target on their back as long as I’m alive. If not because of Mist and Julian, then it’ll be because of Shadow.
Is revenge worth putting my surrogate family in danger?
“You need to escape Shadow and we need your cooperation.”
Mist’s words halt me when the door is within my reach.
My chest heaves and adrenaline is still high in my bloodstream. All I want to do is run away and hide, but that won’t save Liam and Elle’s lives.
I slowly turn around. Mist is still sitting in a relaxed posture, her arms uncrossed. Julian stands beside her like a dutiful bodyguard. Both of them appear too calm, it causes my skin to prickle.
“What do you mean by you need my cooperation?” I’m so glad that my voice is firm and even. The best way to negotiate is to appear as an equal.
“You want to escape Shadow, correct?” Mist asks.
I nod carefully. This isn’t about whatever twisted desire he conjures in me anymore. It’s about who he is, what he is. A replica of my father. A monster in plain sight.
He’s gotten into me. Not only to my body, but to me. I grew to care about him and that’s the most dangerous part. That’s how victims are born. They keep finding excuses for the demons they live with until they eventually murder them.
I’m ready to break my heart to pieces rather than live my mum’s miserable life.
Escaping Shadow isn’t an option, it’s a necessity.
Mist smiles and it reaches her usually stern eyes. “We can arrange that if you help us in getting a tip to the police.”
“My name is Ghost.” Julian steps forward. “I would like to offer you a deal.”
Chapter Sixteen
I search for her every-fucking-where.
Her phone is closed, so no location whatsoever from that. I tried the lake house and came out empty.
I’m tempted to track down her boyfriend, but I might kill him. Besides, I don’t even know the sorry fuck’s name.
That Rage Ball… just a nickname. I have nothing on her either. I should’ve really stolen Zoe’s phone and collected her data when I had the chance.
I’m a monster in her eyes anyway, so I might as well act like it.
A tense hand rakes through my hair after I get out of the shower. Being soaked with blood won’t help with my search and… I don’t want to scare her. That’s why I didn’t pounce after her immediately.
She was already terrified out of her mind.
That frightened look she gave me will haunt me. Zoe isn’t the type to be scared. She’s the most defiant thing I’ve ever encountered, but she has these moments when she’s a broken fucking doll. I don’t know why that bothers me so much.
I shove my legs into trousers and throw on a T-shirt. The cloth rubs against my shoulder wound, and I hiss.
My head still throbs and my hands twitch. An Omega dose would be brilliant about now, but I can’t trust myself on that poison.
I don’t want Zoe to see that robotic look again, not after she ran like a scared kitten.
All I could think about when I sliced the cockroach’s throat was death. He had his hands on her and therefore, he needed to fucking die.
No one touches her and lives. It was that simple at the moment.
I didn’t even think that I should shut him up because he knew my secret. I didn’t consider that I was killing someone in front of Zoe.
Now that I think about it, I shouldn’t have killed him while she stood there. Just because I drown in blood and destruction, she doesn’t. No matter how strong she appears.
I hop down the stairs of the safe house and into the club. It’s opening hours so the walls thud with loud music. Sweaty bodies dance and laugh and I want to break all their fucking necks.
The thought flees when I find who I’m looking for. An old man swats Natalie’s arse. Lucky for him, Mist isn’t around. Lachlan is. He hauls the man to his feet and shows him to the door.
Natalie bows her head and heads to the storeroom at the back.
I follow her and find her fiddling with boxes.
“Have you seen Zoe?”
Natalie startles, and slowly turns around, lips parted and her dark skin paling a shade. Her gaze drifts sideways as if searching for an escape.
There won’t be any.
I tower over her and repeat in a more clipped tone. “I said. Have you seen Zoe?”
“N-no.” She clasps her fingers together. “We’re not as close anymore.”
“If you’re hiding anything…” I leave the warning hanging. I’m sure she’s hiding something and she knows better than to test my non-existent patience.
Her teeth nibble on her bottom lip before her brown eyes peek up at me. She opens her mouth then closes it.
“What is it?” I don’t have time for this nonsense.
“I… saw her go into Mist’s office earlier.”
“Earlier?”
“When I returned from the kindergarten.”
Around the time she ran away from me. Well, isn’t Zoe a smart thing? Le Salon’s compound is the last place I’d search.
I storm upstairs to Mist’s office. The doorknob almost crumble under my forceful shove.
Mist and Ghost sit across from each other on the sofa with a shitload of papers in front of them. Flame’s motionless body is thrown on a side sofa, slumbering as usual.
I storm inside and snap at Mist. “Where is she?”
She reaches for the bottle of scotch and pours the amber liquid in the glass. “Who?”