Thin

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Thin Page 11

by Alicia Michaels


  Chapter Twelve

  I woke up the next day with a headache and puffy eyes. After a restless night, I didn’t exactly feel up to facing anyone, but knew I didn’t have a choice. It was family day, and my parents and friends would be coming a long way to see me. It was also Saturday, which meant Royce wouldn’t be around. Despite a pounding headache and the shame of embarrassment that had me wanting to lock myself in my room for the remaining sixty days, I could at least be grateful I wouldn’t have to face him. Yet.

  My weekend nurse came and went with my morning meds, retreating to the nurse’s station to find me some aspirin once I informed her of my headache. After a shower and breakfast, I felt a little more like myself. Going back to my room after eating, I decided to take some time to actually style my hair and put on some makeup. Halfway through running a flatiron over my hair—which had begun to revert back to its natural curls—Dawn appeared in the doorway of our bathroom, dressed in her customary oversized sweatshirt and sneakers, hair piled on top of her head.

  “Well, look at you,” she said, leaning against the doorframe. “One would think you’ve got a hot date instead of a reunion with your parental units.”

  I shrugged, keeping my gaze on the mirror and red-hot iron in my hands. “Just wanted to look nice for a change.”

  “You do look cute,” she muttered grudgingly. “Methinks that others will think so as well.”

  I snorted. “Like who? Derek?”

  Darting a glance at her from the corner of my eye, I watched as a devilish smile spread across her smile.

  “I was thinking someone else … a certain sexy counselor.”

  My heart began to pound, sending a surge of adrenaline through me and causing my hands to shake. My mouth was suddenly dry, and I could hardly breathe. Did Dawn know something? Had she seen us at some point?

  Putting down the flatiron, I ran my fingers through my straightened locks. I told myself that I was overreacting. Of course she hadn’t seen anything—until last night there hadn’t been anything to see and we’d most certainly been alone in the studio last night.

  I forced a confused expression onto my face, and a laugh. “Girl, what are you talking about?”

  “Right. Pretend you don’t know what I’m talking about. I think we both know you aren’t spending so much time in the art studio because you have nothing better to do.”

  She was only half right. I had enjoyed rediscovering painting, but part of me knew she had hit the nail on the head when it came to Royce. I was spending so much time in a space he also happened to occupy because it made me feel better. Still, I couldn’t exactly admit that to her.

  “Actually, I’m just doing it to annoy my mother,” I said, reaching for my makeup bag. “She thinks painting is a waste of time.”

  Not exactly a lie. My mom’s assertion that painting was distracting me from more important pursuits is one of the reasons I’d stopped.

  Dawn came to stand next to me, leaning against the counter and helping herself to my eyeshadow. Inspecting a few of them, she chose a dark shade of navy, then began applying it to one eyelid.

  “Just when I begin to think you’re more boring than a slice of white bread, you rise,” she murmured. “I’m all about revenge painting. Please tell me you’re going to show them what you’ve been working on.”

  Despite being annoyed with her for guessing my secret so easily, I couldn’t help but smile. “Actually, I do plan on showing them.”

  Finished with the blue, she grabbed a sparkly silver. Meanwhile, I chose to stick with more natural tones, opting for a bit of color in my blush and lip gloss.

  “Hmmm, I might actually come to this thing.”

  Pausing, I turned to her. She was rimming her eyes with my black eyeliner pencil, making the colors on her eyelids even more startling.

  “You’re not coming to family day?”

  Giving me a rueful smile, she shook her head. “Come on now, you know nobody is coming to see me.”

  Not for the first time, I felt my chest ache at the thought that Dawn was so abandoned. As hard as it had been to be surrounded by people who didn’t understand what I was going through, at least I’d had people. Dawn had absolutely no one.

  “I’ll share my people with you,” I said. “My friends are coming to visit, too, and you’ll like them. One of them is single and insanely hot.”

  Dawn’s eyebrows shot up and her grin grew even wider. “Count me in.”

  I finished off my face, taking one last look in the mirror. Unable to avoid the inevitable any longer, we left my room, stopping by the art studio on our way down to grab my finished painting. Clutching the dried canvas in my hands, I tried not to fidget, or let my nerves get the best of me.

  I hadn’t been prepared for how hard it would be to face people after being closeted away for thirty days. Would they see the small changes in me? Would they approve? Or would they look at me with pity, because it wouldn’t appear to have been enough? I was still terribly underweight, and I feared they would notice and think my time here had been a waste.

  Closing my eyes as the elevator arrived on the dining/rec room floor, I took a few deep breaths. The doors opened, and I was left with no choice but to leave it along with everyone else.

  The dining hall and recreation rooms were filled with people, milling around in groups and talking. I could see that a table had been prepared with coffee, tea, and little assorted pastries, which most seemed to have taken advantage of. My stomach was tied into too many knots for me to even consider eating.

  Clutching my painting for dear life, I glanced around the room, searching for any familiar faces. I was shocked to find Dr. Iverson, lingering near the refreshment table and speaking with Derek and his parents.

  “What’s he doing here?” I asked, leaning close so Dawn could hear me over the buzz of too many conversations at once.

  “Oh, you didn’t know? All the therapists and staff come to family day … you know, to assure the parentals that we’re all being good little special snowflakes.”

  My heart leapt up into my throat at her words, and I felt my eyes growing wide. It was hard not to crane my neck, glancing around the room with panic flaring in my chest.

  “Ooh, that means Hottie McBody is here,” she said. “You gonna introduce him to your parents?”

  “Shut up,” I snapped, spotting him in the crowd.

  He was smiling and chatting with one of the girls from our therapy group and a woman who looked like her mother. My stomach clenched, and I fought the urge to become sick in front of everyone. Before Dawn could retort, a feminine squeal preceded my name being shouted from across the room. I turned in its direction to find Chloe bearing down on me wearing a smile from ear to ear. She was followed by Christian, Luke, and Jenn, who held a gift bag in one hand.

  “Kins!” Chloe cried, throwing her arms around me and crushing me in a tight hug. “Oh my God, look at you!”

  She released me, and Luke took his turn with me. Grabbing my shoulders, he gave me a once over and nodded as if in approval.

  “You look … amazing.”

  I smiled back at him. “Thanks, Luke.”

  “Get out of my way,” grumbled Christian, hobbling toward me.

  He’d traded his crutches for a cane, and seemed to be getting around better than when I’d last seen him.

  “There’s my girl,” he murmured, reaching out to pull me against him with one arm. Kissing the top of my head, he held me longer than the others had, because it’s what Christian does. “How are you?”

  “I’m good,” I said, leaning back to look him in the eye. “Really. This place is … it’s better than I thought it would be. I’m making great progress.”

  Jenn was next, handing me the gift bag and hugging me with tears in her eyes. “I miss you so much,” she whispered.

  Seeing her again just reminded me how far apart we’d drifted as friends due to my illness. I had missed her, too. In truth, I’d been missing her for a long time.

>   “Me too,” I replied, feeling my throat constrict, making my voice hoarse.

  Gesturing toward Dawn, I directed their attention to her. “Guys, this is Dawn, my next-door neighbor. Dawn, these are the guys—Christian, Luke, Chloe, and Jenn. Hey, where’s Chase?”

  “Working,” Chloe replied. “He’s been putting in extra hours because he’s saving up for a new car. His tin can on wheels is crapping out on him.”

  Dawn pointed at Chloe and turned toward me with a laugh. “I like this chick already.”

  Chloe met eyes with Dawn, who I felt certain she’d been separated from at birth. “Nice eyeshadow. Mac?”

  “I think so,” Dawn replied. “I stole it from Kinsley’s bag.”

  Chloe rolled her eyes. “Like she’d ever actually wear it. I’m always telling that girl to be more adventurous. But, do you think she listens to me?”

  The Blonde Squad went on with their conversation, seeming to forget the rest of us were there, so I turned back to the others.

  “Have you seen my parents?”

  Jenn glanced around the room and shook her head. “Not yet. We just got here a few minutes ago.”

  “Hey, what’s that?” Luke asked, pointing toward my canvas.

  Flipping it around, I showed them the painting with a nervous smile. “It’s my painting. There’s a studio here, and I visit pretty much every day as part of my therapy.”

  Luke’s eyes widened. “You painted that?”

  “I didn’t know you painted,” Christian said. “Kins, you’re really good.”

  “Thanks,” I replied, feeling my cheeks heat with embarrassment. “I’m out of practice, but it’s been nice to get back into it. But, hey, you guys don’t want to hear about what I’m doing in here. It’s pretty boring. What about you guys? How was graduation?”

  For a moment, no one spoke, and no one would look me in the eye. Sighing, I shifted my weight from one foot to the other, resting a hand on one hip.

  “Seriously, you guys, It’s not going to kill me to hear about it. Spill!”

  Luke nodded. “Okay … well, graduation was great.”

  “It was better than great,” Christian said, nudging Luke. “Someone heard from his agent that night about a pretty big gig.”

  Remembering that Luke’s band had hired an agent to go about scouting better opportunities for Wicked City, I gazed at him expectantly.

  “Well? What’s the gig?”

  Luke’s face reddened and he glanced down at his shoes with a little smirk. “Touring with Fall Out Boy.”

  He’d murmured so low, for a second I wasn’t sure I’d heard him correctly. “Did you say … Oh my God, Luke, that’s amazing!”

  He shrugged. “It’s a start. We’re one of their opening acts.”

  “Don’t be modest,” Jenn said, wrapping an arm around his waist. “This is a huge opportunity.”

  “It is,” I agreed. “I’m so proud of you, Luke. Wow, you graduated and got that big news all in one night. That’s crazy.”

  “Oh, there’s more,” Christian said, darting a sly glance in Jenn’s direction. “You better tell her before I do.”

  Furrowing my brow, I glanced back at Jenn. I couldn’t believe I’d missed it—that look she got on her face when she was trying to keep a secret, but was dying to tell someone. She had never been good at hiding things.

  Holding up her left hand, she flashed a modest but beautiful diamond ring. “So … this happened.”

  My eyes got so wide, I was surprised they didn’t bug out of my head. “You guys got engaged?”

  Jenn nodded, finally letting the big smile she’d been holding back overtake her face. “Luke proposed during the graduation party at Christian’s parents’ house.”

  “Of course she said yes, because I’m about to be a super mega star.”

  Pinching his arm, Jenn rolled her eyes. “Please, I’m only using you to get to Patrick Stump.”

  Luke put her in a light, playful headlock, and tousled her hair. “And that’s why you don’t get to come on tour with me, precious.”

  I couldn’t help but laugh, despite also feeling like I might cry. “You guys, I’m so happy for you. I hate I missed the proposal.”

  Christian raised his phone. “Oh, don’t worry, there’s video.”

  Before I could reply, I caught movement near the elevators and recognized my dad—who tends to tower over most people due to his freakish height.

  “Oh, my parents are here,” I said, standing on tiptoe and waving to catch his attention. I couldn’t see my mom, but I assumed she was being blocked by the sea of bodies between me and them. “Guess I better go to them.”

  “Yeah, we’re going to go,” Luke said, one arm still draped over Jenn’s shoulders. “We don’t want to interrupt your time with them.”

  “We just wanted to see you, and let you know we’re still rooting for you,” Jenn added.

  I would much rather have spent the entire day with them, but supposed I was obligated to think of my family first. Still, I couldn’t help feeling a bit annoyed that my time with them had been so short.

  “Thanks for coming,” I said. “I miss you guys.”

  “Only sixty more days,” said Chloe, appearing back at my side with Dawn. “We’ll be waiting.”

  “Yeah, but 4C is no more,” I said, feeling a twinge of sadness. “Luke is going on tour, the rest of you are moving out. It won’t be the same.”

  “Well, me, Chase, Luke, and Jenn all got a place together downtown,” Chloe replied. “And Kara’s still at 4C. Wherever you decide to go when you get out of there, someone will be there.”

  That felt comforting, knowing most of the group was still together in some form. After another round of hugs, they left, leaving me with no choice but to face my parents.

  “You coming?” I asked Dawn, before setting off across the room.

  I didn’t really wait to see if she followed. At this point, it didn’t matter if she came or not. Nothing could prepare me for this moment, not even having a friend next to me. My dad spotted me and waved, his face lighting up with a smile. I weaved through the crowd toward them, still clutching my canvas in front of me, with Jenn’s gift bag draped over one of my arms. Finally, I reached them near the refreshment table. My dad’s big body blocked my view of anything else as he swooped down on me, crushing me in a tight hug.

  “Slim,” he murmured. “It’s so good to see you.”

  I balanced my canvas on the floor with one hand, hugging him back with the other. “You too, Daddy.”

  I pulled back to find my mom at his side. She was her usual, stoic self, wearing dress pants even on a Saturday, hair scraped back from her face in a ponytail.

  “Hello, Kinsley,” she said, reaching out to give me a less enthusiastic hug than my father. “You look well.”

  Tucking my hair behind one ear, I nodded. “Thank you. I’m feeling much better.”

  Glancing around the room, my mother observed its occupants with a detached coolness that left me wondering what she might be thinking. It was always hard to tell with her.

  “I would like to meet the person in charge of your therapy,” she said. “Are they here?”

  “Sure, Mom,” I replied, gesturing to where Dr. Iverson stood a few feet away, refilling his coffee cup. “That’s Dr. Iverson, and he’s my therapist.”

  My mom nodded, seeming to size him up. “Introduce us, please.”

  “First things first,” Dad said, with an annoyed glance in my mom’s direction. “We have a surprise for you.”

  Mom rolled her eyes. “You have a surprise for her … I never agreed to this.”

  Ignoring her, Dad gestured toward the doors of the dining room. “He wanted to see you, and asked to drive up with us. I thought you might like to see him.”

  If at all possible, breathing became even more difficult. I couldn’t believe I hadn’t seen him before, or at least sensed his presence in the room. There had been a time when I’d felt constantly aware of him, but I suppo
se being overwhelmed by so many people in a crowded room had stolen my focus. Now, I couldn’t think of much else as Aaron came toward me, a bouquet of flowers in one hand.

  God, he looked amazing, and as he drew closer and extended the flowers to me, I couldn’t help but notice he smelled incredible, too.

  “Aaron,” I managed to choke out in a squeaky voice.

  He smiled, reaching out to pull me into his arms. “I hope your offer to let me come visit you is still a good one.”

  “Of course it is,” I said, and while I meant it, I also couldn’t ignore the unease that his presence caused me to feel.

  Cupping my face in one hand, he inspected me and nodded with approval. “You look … better. More like you.”

  I smiled, but it felt false. It was a compliment, but something about it still struck a chord with me that felt wrong.

  “Thank you,” I replied, moving away from his touch.

  If he noticed, he didn’t indicate it with his expression, and he certainly didn’t say anything.

  You’re overreacting, I told myself. You’re just freaking out because of Royce. This is Aaron … you love Aaron.

  “Come on, Amala,” my dad said, sparing Mom a glance. “Let’s go meet Dr. Iverson and leave them alone to talk.”

  Still holding my gift bag from Jenn, Aaron’s flowers, and my canvas, I continued trying to balance all the items. I used it as an excuse to avoid eye contact.

  “So, I’ve been apartment hunting,” he said after an awkward silence. “You know, for a place a little closer to campus.”

  Frowning, I finally gathered the nerve to look up at him. “You’re almost done with your graduate program. Why would you care about being closer to campus?”

  Aaron frowned. “For you, of course. I know you’ll want to go back full time in the fall so you can graduate. We’ll have the entire summer to get settled.”

  I could feel myself blinking … a lot. Like, more than a normal amount of blinking for the span of thirty seconds. I was so stunned, I couldn’t form words at first.

 

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