by Britney King
This was the last thought Jessica remembered having prior to awakening sometime later on a gurney. She surveyed her familiar surroundings, sighed, and pulled herself upright to a seated position. Seated adjacent to her, immersed in a book, was Myles, her new employee. The one she hadn’t gotten around to having Addison fire. Jess squeezed her temples and eyed the blonde haired, clean cut, oversized man. He was huge. Proportionally huge. He didn’t look up so she broke the silence. “I take it yoga didn’t go so well…”
He placed a bookmark between the pages and met her gaze head on in a way that made her instantly uncomfortable. His eyes were such a pale shade of blue that they practically cut right through her.
“I’d say that’s an understatement.”
Chapter Eight
What a dumb fucking thing to do, Myles wanted to scream at her. But he refrained himself knowing all too well this wasn’t likely to go over well. Instead, he took a more direct approach. “Are you trying to have your children taken away?”
Myles eyed Jessica, who picked at a thread on her hospital gown. It took all he had not to take his thumbs and gently wipe the mascara that had smeared beneath her eyelids. He wanted to reach for her chin and force her to look at him. He wanted to shake her. He wanted to ask her what in the hell she was thinking and to tell her how ignorant he thought she was for taking so much for granted. Mostly though, he wanted to know why he cared so much in the first place. “Answer me, Jessica.”
She frowned and slowly met his eye. “What do you think?”
“Since you asked… I think driving under the influence is a really dumb fucking thing to do. Doing so, with your kids in the car… well, that’s pretty hard to top.”
She cocked her head to the side. “Why are you here, anyway?”
He wanted to tell her that her staff had picked him because no one else wanted to clean up her mess, but figured maybe it wasn’t the best approach. “It’s my job.”
Jessica glared at him. “Well, I’m relieving you of that.” She nodded at the door. “You’re free to go.”
Myles brushed his forehead as if to say whew. “Everything has always come so easy to you, hasn’t it? If I had to guess… I’d say you’re a daddy’s girl, who never wanted for much…” Did she have any idea how much he would give to be in her shoes? Just once more, even if for a day, just so he could get it right.
She shot him a go to hell look, which told him everything he already knew. He sat back in his chair, crossed his arms behind his head, and leaned back against them. He stared at her for a second too long and then up at the ceiling. “I’m afraid it’s not that simple. I’m under contract…”
Jessica changed the subject. “When is the doctor coming back? I need something for my head. And I need to get out of here.”
“No. What you need is to give in to the pain. Stop relying on substances to fix your problem.”
“Don’t tell me what I need to do. Who in the fuck are you to talk to me about pain? You seem to get around just fine.”
The doctor entered then. She glanced from Myles to Jessica and cleared her throat. She looked down at the chart she held in her hand, and then extended the opposite to shake Jessica’s hand. The woman, all business, no fun, he’d accessed, eyed him as he sat up in his chair. “You must be Mr. Clemens?”
He shook his head. “No.”
She appeared confused but continued. “Jessica, it appears that you pushed your limits a little too far this morning… after reviewing your recent medical history, I would advise against Hot Yoga for the foreseeable future. The CT scan came back clear, which confirms my suspicions that it was over-exertion that caused the fainting episode.”
Myles watched Jessica as the doctor spoke. He noted the way her eyes lit up when she realized she hadn’t been found out. Give an inch, they take a mile. “Can I have something for my head?” she asked. “I must have hit it when I went down…”
The doctor checked the chart again. “Absolutely. I’ll call down to the pharmacy and order something up. In the meantime, we’ll probably keep you here for another hour or so for observation. Just to make sure.”
“Are you sure that’s a good idea, doc? The medication, I mean. I wouldn’t want to mask the symptoms if there were an underlying condition.”
The woman gave a hard smile. Clearly, no one questioned her authority either. “That’s a very valid concern. But I’m just prescribing a little something to take the edge off. Mrs. Clemens has been through a lot this morning. The stress of it is likely contributing to the headache.”
Myles nodded. “I see.”
He watched Jessica’s face as his suggestion was shot down. When the doctor pulled the curtain, Jessica winked at him. She held his gaze. “I guess it really is just like you said… it’s pretty amazing how everything comes so easily for me.”
Myles watched her lips as she spoke and imagined giving her a little something to quiet that smart mouth of hers.
Instead, he shook his head and decided that suddenly, he too, needed something to take the edge off.
There’s a certain look a person has in their eye that always tells him they also suffer from what ails him. It could be loneliness, it could be pain—sometimes it was boredom… but whatever it was, he learned to spot it a mile away.
Today it happened to be a nurse restocking hospital rooms. As Myles walked the corridors under the guise of searching for coffee, he noticed her immediately. He noticed right away the way she met his eye and then looked at the floor before looking back up at him again. A sign of submission. He passed her up and then turned back and asked for directions to the cafeteria. A mere ten minutes and a small chat later, he had her bent over a shelf in the supply closet, his hand covering her mouth. When they’d both finished, he watched her re-dress as he disposed of the condom in the appropriate medical waste container. He’d always had a thing for nurses. He straightened himself up and refastened his belt, and then he leaned in and kissed her forehead, telling her that they should meet again. Knowing they never would.
Myles didn’t wait for her to respond. He turned the lock and pushed the door open just slightly.
“You go first,” he’d whispered ushering her out. “I’ll wait here for a minute.”
The girl smiled. This wasn’t her first rodeo.
Satisfied, albeit temporarily, he tucked in his shirt and exited shortly behind her.
Once he was in the clear, he stopped and leaned against the wall. He cleared his mind before making his way back down to the emergency room. He may make risky choices, but at least he was always safe. He had nothing left to lose anyway. And he could stop anytime he wanted to.
This was more than he could say for that boss of his.
“What the hell happened to you?” she’d asked when he returned, her tone giving everything away. Women always knew. He figured they smelled it.
Myles cocked his head to the side and looked her up and down. “I’d ask you the same thing, but I’m afraid I already know.”
They both had their secrets—he was simply better at hiding his. But in her defense, she was smarter than he’d given her credit for. Don’t get too close, he reminded himself. History always repeats itself.
She frowned. “You look like you just ran a marathon…”
He flashed the best shit-eating grin he could muster. “Maybe I did.”
Chapter Nine
“Declined?” She asked.
“Yes ma’am, I’ve tried it twice.”
Jessica dug through her handbag and reached into her wallet. “Here, try this one.”
The clerk gave her a look that was somewhere between sympathy and annoyance.
Jess touched the items she had placed on the counter and then looked back over at Myles, who was sitting in an oversized chair rubbing at his temples. He’d been her permanent sidekick, much to both of their disappointment, ever since the Yoga incident. Jess couldn’t help but notice how unhappy he looked, and wondered how long they would both be able to keep thi
s up. She was a danger—not only to herself but to her children as well, a message her husband, mother, and best friend had so gently delivered a few days following her trip to the emergency room. Her husband by way of Skype. Who hosts an intervention via Skype? Jess had asked Myles at one point. She wasn’t certain, but she was pretty sure he’d whispered, “Pussies, that’s who,” under his breath.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Clemens. This one isn’t working either. We are able to hold your items for up to twenty-four hours…”
“She’s holding up the line,” a young twenty-something said aloud as though Jess herself wasn’t aware of this fact and couldn’t hear her. “But don’t worry. She probably has another one to pull out, as if no one around here has anywhere to be,” the girl continued. A few fellow shoppers murmured similar sentiments. Most just stared.
Jessica shifted her feet. Her leg was hurting pretty badly today as was her back. She needed to take something soon or else tomorrow would be worse. The usual and agreed upon dosage wasn’t doing it anymore. “This is insane!” She found herself shouting a little louder than she’d intended. Additional shoppers were starting to take notice of her predicament no doubt, thanks to the snotty twenty-something and her huffing and puffing coming from the rear of the line. She took her credit card from the clerk’s hand. “I need to make a phone call. I’ll be back.” Jess said as she turned, shoved her wallet back in her handbag, and glared at the loud-mouthed girl.
She’d intended to say something once she reached her, but as Jess made her way through the line, her leg gave out, and she fell. No one moved to help as Jessica tried in vain to pick herself up. The clerk came from around the counter and stared, her mouth open.
Immediately, Myles was at her side as she tried once again in vain to rise up off the floor. “Here, let me help,” he whispered.
Jess intended to refuse his offer, she was embarrassed enough as it was, but when she met his gaze, she was surprised to see something in his eyes, something she hadn’t seen before. She nodded before he grabbed just underneath her armpits with both hands and gently pulled her up. She steadied herself as Myles held her in place. “Are you dizzy?”
She shook her head. “My leg hurts.”
Myles addressed the clerk. “Hold those items, the last name’s Ingram.” Then he turned, swiftly picked Jess up, and carried her out, parting the crowd in the process. If people hadn’t been staring before, they certainly were now. But for the first time in a long time, Jessica Clemens found she didn’t give a damn.
The long car ride home was mostly a silent one until she interrupted the silence. “I don’t understand why he would do this?”
Myles didn’t respond right away and when he did, it wasn’t what she expected. It never was. “It’s none of my business, but I’m not sure how you didn’t see this coming.”
The fight had gone out of her. She was hurting too bad to put forth any real effort. “Well, I didn’t.”
Myles looked her way and studied her face. He started to speak and hesitated before starting again. “Do you want my opinion?”
Jess stared out the window. It was a cloudy day and a light rain had begun to fall, fitting weather for the occasion, she thought. “I don’t know. Do I?”
“I guess I just have a hard time understanding how you let it happen.”
She was disappointed with his response but not in the mood to fight. “Oh?”
Myles lowered his voice and focused his attention on the road. “I assume he has complete control of your finances.”
Jess sighed. “Your assumption would be correct...”
“Sadly,” was all he said in return.
“What am I going to do about it?”
He looked over then, offering a small smile. “I don’t know… but I’m sure you’ll figure something out.”
Jess leaned her head against the cool glass window and closed her eyes.
There was nothing more she wanted to say and so she let the silence fill her up. How could she have been so stupid to hand over not only all responsibility of her personal finances to her husband but also her family’s fortune? She couldn’t even recall exactly when this had happened or how the decision had been made. And to think she’d never once considered it a bad idea. She wasn’t sure which was worse—the fact that she had done it to begin with or the fact that she hadn’t known better.
Myles interrupted her reverie. “Hey, Jess.”
She opened one eye and peeked out in his direction.
“Try not to let that something be the pills, okay?”
Jess closed her eyes, curled up, and shifted to fully face the window. “Aye, aye, Captain.”
Myles smiled to himself. Captain. It had been a long time since anyone had referred to him that way.
This wasn’t so bad. Who knew what tomorrow would bring, but that day, they’d both gotten at least a few things right.
Jess woke the following morning and found that the pain was as bad as she’d expected. If not worse. She rolled over to grab the pills Myles had set out for her. Ever since the Yoga incident and subsequent intervention, her medication had been closely monitored. It was dished out to her at regular intervals and she was accompanied whenever she left the house. Of course, she hadn’t agreed to these terms completely voluntarily. There was the threat of sending her back to rehab, or to a different rehab altogether, if she couldn’t cope, a threat that weighed heavily on her mind.
She tossed the pills back and placed the glass of water back on her bedside table when something caught her eye. Hanging on a rack in her bedroom were none other than the pieces she’d picked out at Neiman Marcus the day prior. Jessica pulled herself to a seated position, then slowly stood, and made her way over to them. She grinned as she ran her hand over the fabric. There was a note attached to the top of one of the garment bags, which Jess removed and unfolded carefully.
These are on me. Get your shit together, though. I’m almost starting to like it here. —Myles
She carefully refolded the note and placed it in her nightstand drawer. She had an idea and quickly wondered how she’d missed this all along. It was all starting to make sense now.
Jess showered and dressed. She took two swigs off the bottle of vodka she had hidden in her closet drawer, instead of the usual three. She wasn’t perfect, she had her secrets, but at least she knew her limits.
And, anyway, she had a plan.
Jess sat in her new dress, sipping her tea as she watched the way Myles played with her daughter in the garden. She noticed the way her son had taken to him, and her son didn’t take to very many.
“Nice dress.” He nodded in her direction, slipping into one of the patio chairs opposite her.
“You’re a natural, you know,” she said catching him off guard.
He shrugged and looked away.
“You know, I was just thinking… I really don’t know anything about you…”
“There’s not much to know.” He smiled, slipped out of the chair, and resumed playing keep-away from Catherine.
Jessica cleared her throat and shouted over the noise. “Catherine, it’s time for your riding lesson.”
“But I don’t want to ride today!” her daughter yelled, placing her hands on her hips. “I want to stay and play with Myles.”
She sighed. “Catherine—”
Myles interrupted by throwing Catherine over his shoulder. “Don’t worry, I got this. I’ll drive her down to the stable.”
Jess shook her head. “Let Dean. I need to talk to you about something, actually.”
He deadpanned. Why did women have to make it so difficult? “Well, there’s only one problem… you see, I made a pinky promise. And I don’t take pinky promises lightly.”
Unable and unwilling to argue the value or relevance of a pinky promise, she watched them pull away, and then she picked up her cell and dialed Addison.
“I’m in trouble,” Jess whispered when she answered.
Addison laughed. “You’re telling me.”
“No, I’m serious. Spence cut me off. He canceled my credit cards… I don’t have access to our other accounts. ”
Addison exhaled. “Oh. How very like Spencer.”
“Yeah. Anyway, I have a plan. But I need your help... I’m going to send you an email outlining what I need here in a minute—”
Addison cut her off. “Jess, you need to call your attorney.”
“Actually, I have a little something else in mind first.” She eyed Myles coming around the bend in the Ranger. “But hey—I gotta go. Look for my email, will you?”
She clicked the phone off as Myles pulled up a chair and took a seat. He eyed her expectantly.
Jess smiled. “First off, thank you for picking up the clothes. You really didn’t have to do that. And I realize that I don’t exactly have cheap tastes so I’m having the agency reimburse you—”
“Wow.” Myles sat up straighter and cut her off.
She looked confused. “What?”
“Nothing.”
Myles changed his mind and leaned in close, propping his elbows on the table. “Can I ask you a question, Jessica?”
“Sure.”
He smiled ruefully. “How many friends do you have?”
She didn’t follow. “I don’t know. Why?”
“I mean friends… that don’t work for you. How many people are close to you who aren’t on your payroll?”
She leaned back in her chair and crossed her arms. “That’s a terrible thing to say.”