I had to remember to get Deacon a gift for delivering the letter for me.
Monday, March 2, 2015
Ethan
The very thought I was going to get to see her, touch her was almost too much. I had so many things to say, but above all I wanted to tell her she was it for me. I loved her beyond reason and was ready to beg her to come back to me.
It was six thirty when I felt a small hand on my back. It caused my heart to leap into my throat. I flipped my head around to see not her but Sarah. Shit, she couldn’t face me and sent a ringer in the form of her overprotective roommate.
“Ethan, how are you doing?”
Hell, how do you think I am doing? “Fine,” I said with an annoyed frown.
“Dylan sent me to ask you to leave her alone. She has already moved on and found another person to love.”
Part of me died at that moment. She told me she would always love me, and now, she was lying in the arms of someone else.
“She can’t love him.”
“I’m sorry; Ethan, but this person will be the love of her life. She wanted me to give you this and thank you for everything.”
Sarah pushed a note across the table. I picked it up and could smell a trace of Dylan on it. Sarah got up and left. I sat there holding the envelope in my hands, unable to open it. I could have lived with her running when life got to be too much. Fuck, I would have let her beat the hell out of me if it meant she would feel better. But I could never ever let her tell me her final good-byes. She was mine, damn it. I slipped a hundred under my plate, kissed the letter, and placed it on the table. The clock on the wall showed it was fourteen minutes past seven. I would, from that day forward, mark that time as my time of death.
Outside, the skies had opened up and the rain poured down washing the tears from my face. I took off running. I hurt everywhere; the dull ache of my breaking heart ate away at me. I found myself running to her apartment. I had to see her.
The closer I got, the quicker my pace became. The void was overwhelming. I was desperate to see her. She needed to look at me to see what she meant to me. I had to tell her one more time she was the only one that mattered in life.
I paused outside her apartment, it was void of life. Maybe she was asleep. I thought of how angelic she appeared sleeping. I was suddenly struck with the most dreadful thought . . . she was not there at all. A nightmare played in my mind . . . she was with him, the one who might be the love of her life.
Shit, I was nauseous. Jealousy smacked me in the gut. I hated it. It stirred the part of me that I had spent the last year trying to hide. Pain shot through me; it was fucking indescribable. She was gone. The only good in my life had moved on without me. She wasn’t just running; I’d lost her forever. I would never get to hold her hand, kiss her cheek, or hear her laughter again.
She wanted to get away from me, and I couldn’t blame her. I was only a reminder of her past, a sinking anchor, but damn, I would always love her. My heart was ripped from my chest, and I was left with nothing but a nagging, empty hole.
I didn’t even return for my car. I just walked and walked and walked. I had passed by her apartment more times than I cared to remember. I got a glimpse of Sarah entering the apartment about an hour after leaving the restaurant . . . still not a trace of Dylan. The thought that she had moved on, that she could possibly be in the arms of anybody but me was way too much for my fragile nerves.
I spotted a small bar right across the street from Dylan’s apartment. I would sit outside under the pavilion and watch for her . . . and drink myself into a comma. I was so lost without her. Why did I listen to my fucking heart? If only I had stayed away from her, not ever held her. Hell, I should have let them kill her. I kicked a chair across the room. NO! I would never let them touch her. I fucked her life up once, and I would never do that again. If she wanted a good-bye, I would give her one.
“What do you want, handsome?”
I glanced up and caught the smile from a stunning blonde. She was no Dylan, but she would have caused my dick to stir B.D. (before Dylan). Her breasts spilled out from her blouse, calling out to be touched. That was what I did too. I caressed them with the back of my finger.
“How about a bottle of Jose Cuervo and some salt on that cute little . . .” I reached down and cupped my hand over her groin. She giggled as I licked my upper lip.
“I get off work in two hours and will meet you out back,” she whispered.
I slipped some money in her shirt pocket and winked. I’d be waiting, but it would not be the night of romance she was hoping for. She would get what she wanted but on my terms. I didn’t cuddle. I did once and it about killed me.
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Dylan
I sat and looked at the window, still hoping he would show. Sarah was right . . . Ethan was not worth my time. He knew who I was and where to find me. If he cared, he would have come. If he didn’t care, I at least got the best of him in the child I was carrying.
“Knock, Knock,” Sarah said as she pushed the door open. She looked fresh-face and extremely happy until she caught a glimpse of me. I wasn’t sure if I was drowning or simply focused on the fact I had no one but a baby to raise. Whatever it was, Sarah sensed my trepidation. “Did he come?”
I shook my head and turned to stare out the window letting the envelope, containing the ultrasound picture showing if Baby E was a boy or girl, fall to the floor. Sarah picked it up and noticed the giant question mark on the outside. I’d wanted to open it with the man I knew in my heart to be the baby’s father. I’d dreamed of that moment. A moment . . . not to come.
“What’s this?” she asked as she knelt down beside me.
“It’s mine,” I said as I snatched it from her grasp and held it close to my chest. “It doesn’t matter anyway.”
I had enough memories to know I had no one. My own mother had disowned me. How could I bring a baby into a world that didn’t even accept its mom? I wiped at the tears flooding the corner of my eyes. I would not cry. I was determined I had cried all I was going to.
“Talk to me?” Sarah said as she took my hands in hers.
Clutching the envelope holding the ultrasound picture tighter, I squared off my shoulders. “I was wrong. Even though I can’t remember much about him, I was sure he cared.” I shrugged and turned to face Sarah. “Deacon did carry him the note?”
“No, I did. Deacon’s sick. He acted like he could rip my head off for even bothering him.”
“You carried it? But you hate him.” I asked before shaking my head as I gazed out the window.
“Yes, I do, but I love you more than I detest him,” she replied honestly.
I loved Sarah too. But it had nothing on the love I already had for the little bundle I was carrying. My Grandma Beth told me one time that if you truly love someone, you’ll do everything in your power to protect them. No one protected me when I was little, but I was determined to protect my child . . . even if it destroyed me. Sarah wouldn’t understand why I felt the need to give my baby up for adoption. She’d never walked in my shoes, and I was not ready to explain that to her either.
Tuesday, March 3, 2015
Ethan
I demolished that poor man in court. He didn’t deserve that much time. Hell, he didn’t deserve any time, but I was being an ass. All I could think about was Dylan with someone else. She didn’t open up easily to people. I gulped down a shot of Jack and slammed the glass down on the coffee table. He better treat her right, or I would kill him. Why did I care? She was not mine any more. I just had the few precious memories of her to hold on to. I jerked the suit coat off the hook in the hall. I needed to embrace my fate and move on.
I headed to The Dungeon. They were hosting a mixer there that night. I’d find a hot little submissive who wanted a good time and show her to my private suite at the club.
I walked into the party room and scanned the joint. I saw several promising opportunities before making my way over to the bar. Amanda pulled up a stool beside me
. She was a looker, but I’d been there and done that one too many times. Plus, I was still a little pissed she had the nerve to approach Dylan in the restroom at a bar.
“You look like you slept in the gutter, Sir,” Amanda said with a wink.
I downed whatever the bartender had pushed my way. No shit, Sherlock. I feel like I belong in the gutter. I flashed her a smile, knowing it wouldn’t affect her. Amanda was too hardcore to let a few mindless gestures get to her. “That is why I’m here. Hoping to find a little action to help me forget.”
“I’d volunteer, but I’m on guard duty tonight.” She grinned and took a sip of the raspberry lemonade, filling her tall mug. “Speaking of being security, I think I’m needed in zone 3.” She let out a laugh then walked across the room to a man who was not stopping at the safe word. I reminded myself to never sign up for guard duty again and flipped around. Two eager girls wearing killer spiked heels caught my eye. One was even a stunning ginger. She was nowhere close to Dylan’s beauty, but hell, who was?
I shoved off the bar and headed to them. The brunette started stroking her chest which was falling out of a tight red halter top.
“Not your type, bro. Plus, don’t forget about Dylan.” Charlie came up behind me and nudged my shoulder. He had not stopped reminding me I had something to fight for. Once I had quit breaking things and he felt it was safe, he had taken every chance to point out as long as Dylan was breathing, I still had a chance. Little did he know she had moved on, and I didn’t even know where she was breathing?
I glanced back at him. I was there to forget about Dylan. “They’re all my type. At least for one night.” I twisted around and saluted him. “Don’t tell Momma,” I said with a smile.
Charlie shook his head and motioned for me to go on.
Both girls did their best to strike a seductive pose as I approached them. They wanted it, and I was more than willing to dish it out.
“What are two beauties doing here all alone? Surely, someone like you can find a sponsor,” I asked then took a sip of my drink. I was aware that the last thing I needed was a fight. I would kill someone who tried. So I needed to make sure they didn’t have a Dom in the shadows.
They giggled, giving me an instant headache.
“Not yet. No one seems to wants to sponsor us so far,” the ginger replied.
I liked her. She was the more approachable of the two. “Dance,” I ordered and walked past them onto the dance floor. They looked promising, but I wanted to see if they were up to the challenge.
The band started playing Sex is not Enough by Oomph. I jerked the ginger close to my body. “Kiss me.”
She stood on her tiptoes and planted the most passionate kiss on my lips. My stomach swirled in disgust. I craved the sweet taste of Dylan and the way she would bite on my bottom lip if I pulled away too soon.
“Stop,” I growled in her mouth. I would screw them, but kissing was out for good. I pushed them to each other. “Keep dancing; I’ll be back.” I was not drunk enough for all that. I took a seat at the bar and watched them.
The brunette pressed her body against the ginger, causing her tits to spill out over her top. The ginger kneaded one in her hands before sticking her tongue down the brunette’s throat. I had told myself that was the life I wanted. So I needed to learn to enjoy it. I walked over to the two making out in the middle of the dance floor and wrapped my arms around the ginger’s waist. She moved her hand to rest over my erection she had slowly been grinding her back into. I reached across and slid my hand under the tight mini-skirt the brunette was wearing and tickled my finger along her panty line. She pressed her breast against my forearm. I took a suggestive nip at the air imagining it was her breast. My cock grew rock hard as the ginger continuously rubbed her hand over it. Those two would work for one night at least.
“Knees, babe,” I whispered in the ginger’s ear.
She fell to the floor, and before my eyes had time to adjust, she had my cock in her mouth.
Thursday, March 5, 2015
Dylan
After fourteen weeks, I finally got the green light to go home. Danny helped me pack up as we waited for Sarah to pick me up.
“I’m going to miss you sweet-pea. I better get a text when little E gets ready to make her appearance,” he said as he held up a pair of my panties, and raised an eyebrow. I yanked them out of his hands and tossed them in an opened suitcase.
“Only if you promise me flowers.” I laughed to cover my heavy heart. I wouldn’t be calling anyone except the adoptive parents. Maybe, they’ll bring me flowers. So, at least, I could carry something home with me. I scratched my fingers across my stomach wanting the days to slow to a crawl just so I could have my little angel with me for as long as possible. “Plus, who says it’s a her? I’m thinking boy.”
Sarah showed up as Danny zipped the final duffle bag. I couldn’t wait to bust out of the joint, but I was scared to leave the safety of the hospital. In there, I didn’t have to worry about the day-to-day struggles of life. Outside those walls, I was going to have to make the hardest choices in my life.
Deacon and Allison waited for us as Sarah helped me in the door. They had filled the apartment with balloons and flowers covered every flat surface. They had even hung a large banner over the breakfast bar welcoming me home. The couch was stacked with my pillows and my favorite fluffy blanket was causally tossed across the arm of the sofa. Allison propped down and fluffed the pillow over her lap. I was so tired and hurting that I didn’t even complain as I laid down and snuggled my head in her lap.
Allison played with my hair. I had almost drifted off to sleep when she started talking. “Sweetie, we’ll be here for you and the baby. I know you’re scared, but this little sweetheart will have three aunts who already love him.”
I didn’t answer her. I knew she meant every word she said. They would love the baby and treat it like family. But what would happen when life got in the way. Sarah would finally settle down with her true Mr. Right and Deacon and Allison would start their own family. And where would that leave us? Alone. A tear fell down my cheek, hot and heavy. I never wanted my child to know loneliness.
Deacon and Sarah had set our small kitchen table with a feast. It reminded me of one of Ethan’s dinners. I stopped dead in my tracks. I remembered him cooking. I pictured myself at Ethan’s patio table eating all my favorites. Ethan was laughing and flirting. I wanted to kiss him. Then I remembered he didn’t want a kiss from me. He wouldn’t even take a few minutes out of his day to visit me in the hospital.
“What is it?” Sarah looked at me desperately and gripped my forearm before I fell.
“I just had a bad memory,” I said and took a seat at the table. My hands were shaking. Deacon took them in hers and began to rub her thumb soothingly over the back of them. Sarah didn’t like Ethan, and I didn’t want her upset with me. My stomach twisted as I wiped away more tears. Why did I always cry? The little relief the tears gave me only put a little more burden on Deacon and Sarah. I would hold to the memories I had regained and spend my time trying to rebuild my shattered world.
Friday, March 6, 2015
Ethan
“You let them fucking stay.” Charlie’s voice rang against my massive headache. I slowly peeled back my eyelids and was greeted by a set of fake tits in my face. Hung-over, I glanced down to see two long pairs of legs twisted with mine.
I didn’t even know their fucking names. I tapped the brunette’s shoulder. I must have passed out cold. The ginger still had her hands tied behind her back.
“Get the hell out of here,” I stated as I hurriedly untied all their body parts. The ginger came to and let out a pain-inducing chuckle. When I heard the shuffling of Charlie’s feet, I jerked around and saw him leaning against the door, glaring at me.
“What?” I asked as he eyed the two naked women in the bed. I didn’t blame him . . . they were two hot pieces of ass.
“Just get rid of them and meet me in the office,” Charlie said and walked off.
>
What crawled up his ass? That was what we did. We worked hard, partied hard, and fucked harder.
I finished untying an array of arms and legs. Chucking the covers and an untold amount of condom wrappers off the bed, I disentangled myself. “The shop is closed, and it is time to go,” I said, and slapped an ass belonging to one of them. They whined and I couldn’t believe I’d ever even found them amusing. I did feel sorry for them. I almost completely ignored the brunette, and I called the ginger Dylan more than once. She even made a comment that she hoped Dylan was a girl. That earned her one hell of a spanking. I was not sure if it was the fact she implied I was into men or that she dissed Dylan’s name, but I went crazed. Her ass would be covered in bruises for days. Hell, who cared? She wasn’t complaining.
I didn’t even wait until they were up before I threw on a pair of pants sans underwear, and I left them. I headed down to the offices to see what had pissed off Charlie.
Pretty Little Lies (Lie #2) Page 3