by Marie Skye
I raced to Gwen's apartment, and started banging on the door. I swear to fuck if those men did anything to her. I took out my wallet, retrieving the small set of tools I had, because yep, I was about to break in.
The door was way too fucking easy to unlock. I made a mental note to get her a better system.
"Gwen!" I turned on the lights, hoping she wasn't sprawled out on the floor.
"Gwen!"
The TV was on, volume set to low. Suddenly I heard movement, and I stilled as I drew my gun from my holster. I listened as the floor creaked, and I could easily tell which direction it was coming from. I wasn't familiar with Gwen's layout to know the wooding of her floors, but I would have to make do. A shadow figure suddenly emerged, from around a corner, and I instantly pounced, grabbing them by the shoulders.
There was a loud scream, and I finally looked down. Gwen was looking up at me, fear in her eyes.
"Hawkins! What the hell are you doing? How'd you get in here?"
She was practically screaming at me, and all I could focus on was that once again, I was on top of her, and neither one of us was naked.
Her blonde hair had fanned around her, her nostrils flared. Face a tinged red. She was fucking perfect. My perfect.
"Are you even listening to me? Hawkins!"
I focused back on her lips. I pushed down on her, where I had no doubt, she could feel how hard I was. "Do you feel me listening to you, Gwen," I said through gritted teeth.
She stopped talking, and let out a light gasp. I sighed. "I thought you were hurt, or in need of rescuing. You didn't text me back."
She swallowed. "I went to the gym, then took a shower."
"Well, I was worried. I thought that prick was here, then I saw those two idiots in the elevator get on as I got off on your floor. They didn't have a reason to be on this floor, so I thought..."
She smiled, and I narrowed my eyes at her. "It's not funny, Gwen!" I finally eased up off her, and helped her stand up. "You need a better lock on your door. It was way too easy for me to break in."
She scowled at me, before peering over my shoulder at the door. "So, tell me, Hawkins, do you normally break into people's apartments when they don't text you back in a timely manner?"
I looked around the apartment, and ignored her question. "I'll put a better lock on your door." I briefly wondered if I could pull a Grayson, and make her move in with me. "So, you want to tell me what your text was all about?"
She looked at me bewildered for a moment, before darting her eyes. "I wanted your opinion. A guy's opinion. I don't have many guy friends, and I'm obviously terrible in that department."
You're not terrible, they're just assholes.
She looked up at me with amusement in her eyes. "I have a date!" Her smile quickly faltered, when she saw my stony expression.
"With who?"
She began to look nervous.
Don't say Westfuck, don't say Westfuck, don't say Westfuck.
"Ian Westwick. He's a friend of Grayson's."
Fuck. Me.
She stared at me, I suppose the least I could do was offer her a fake smile. "That's great." Chipper. Sound more chipper. "Is he a complete douche?" Way to make it smooth, asshole.
Her face faltered. “Look, I know I don't have the best track record with guys, okay? But Grayson said he's a good guy, and if he's a good guy, then why not see for myself, right?" Before, I could answer her, she continued. "So, what I wanted to ask you, is if you wouldn't mind giving me some pointers. Men are complicated enough as it is."
I watched as she looked down at her feet nervously. She took a deep breath, and shut her eyes, before glancing up at me. Whatever she was trying to say was big for her. "I wanted to know if you would have sex with me?" I arched a brow, because clearly, I didn't hear her correctly. She shook her head grabbing the bridge of her nose. "That didn't come out right."
She gestured toward the sofa. "Can we sit?"
I hesitantly walked over, not taking my eyes off her. She sat a little further from me, and played with the string of her pants. She finally turned to me. She took a deep breath before continuing. “I don’t have much experience, and we don’t have to actually have sex. I’m mainly looking for…. pointers.”
She dropped her head into her hands, and sighed. “Never mind, I should’ve just watched porn.”
Then it dawned on me. “Gwen, are you a virgin?”
Her head popped up and she turned to me, eyes widened. “No!” She let out an awkward laugh. “No. I’ve had sex. Plenty of sex. Lots of people. I’m always having sex.”
I felt a surge of jealousy, and was close to asking who the fuck was she having sex with? I decided to go another route. “Who are you having sex with?”
Nope, not faring any better with reigning in that jealousy.
I watched as she flushed a beautiful shade of red. She was embarrassed. If only she knew what I wanted to do to her. She turned to face me more. “I want to know how I could be better…at things.”
I’ll be damned, if I would give her pointers for some other guy. I cleared my throat. “Are you planning on fucking this Ian person?”
Okay, maybe a little too blunt. Her eyes widened. Before she could speak, I did. “Don’t even bother giving me the whole ‘none of your business’ crap. You’re asking me to give you pointers on sex. I think we’re well past the point of me being in your business.”
She sighed. “All of this sounded better in my head.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry. You should go.” She stood up, walking toward the door. I debated if I wanted to stay or go, before finally getting up.
“I’ll talk to you later, Dove.”
She nodded, not meeting my eyes. I wanted to say more. So much more. But I didn’t.
Five
Gwen
Sleep didn’t come for me last night. I couldn’t shut my brain off, thinking of Hawkins. I slowly got up, and instantly felt the pounding in my head. I reached blindly for my phone to check the time.
It was just after six in the morning, and still dark out. I swung the blanket off me. I had under an hour to get cleaned, changed, and get to work. I rushed to the shower, taking the fastest shower known to man, and was ready to go with twenty minutes to spare.
I pulled out my phone to call for an Uber. I stared in disbelief at my phone, and saw that there was a thirty-minute wait. Crap. There was no way I would get to work in time.
“Need a ride?”
I froze at the voice behind me, and slowly turned. Hawkins stood there, in dark jeans, and a short sleeve shirt that had his muscles bulging out. His hands were in his pockets casually, and he was leaning against the brick wall. Almost as if he were waiting for me to emerge.
I looked down at my phone again. “No, I have an Uber coming.” Lies. All Lies.
“Is, that, right?”
I quickly nodded, as I held up my phone. “Yep. Should be here any minute.”
I looked down the street. There wasn’t a single car coming. I could start walking, and hope someone came free soon.
“You’re not thinking of walking, are you?”
I scowled back at him. “So, what if I was?”
He arched an eyebrow, walked closer to me, and looked me up and down. “Sexy as fuck girl like you, and it’s not even daylight out. You definitely don’t want to be walking by yourself.”
I blushed at his comment, and I turned away, pulling up the Uber app again.
“It’s just a ride, Gwen. That’s it.”
I sighed as I slowly walked the way he gestured. His hand moved to the small of my back, and I lightly gasped. Heat from his body radiated throughout my body. I focused on walking, and not the heat coursing through me, and how his masculine scent alone, made my panties wet.
We reached his car, and he went to open the door, but I cut him off, opening it myself and getting in. Because, fuck him, that’s why. He gave me a smirk, before going to his side of the car.
He started the engine, but we didn’t move.
I could feel his gaze on me, and it was starting to make me nervous. After what felt like eternity, I finally turned to him. “Are we going?”
He stared at me a moment, and he narrowed his eyes, before speaking. “Is there anything you need before we go?”
“Just to get to work.”
“Three dozen assorted croissants, four trays of sandwiches, two trays of assorted cookies and cakes, and four gallons of tea. Hot and cold. And three kinds of soup. Am I missing anything?”
I looked back over the spread in front of me. “Just needs to be loaded up, and we’re on our way.”
After making sure everything was secured in the catering van, we were on our way. I didn’t normally do catering gigs with Tea Lites, but we were short staffed, and I didn’t mind.
“What kind of party is this again?”
Sheerah looked at her sheet. “Baby shower, it looks like. They asked us to serve. You cool with that?”
I shrugged. “No problem. I could use the change of scenery for a bit. Laugh at a few women doing weird ass baby shower games, or whatever they do.”
Sheerah laughed. “Yeah, some of the games are ridiculous, although I’ve a feeling this one might be a bit stuffy, so who knows. I don’t see them melting chocolate in diapers, and making guests guess what kind of chocolate was in it.”
I wrinkled my nose. “That sounds gross.”
“Oh, it is. ‘Guess This Shit’ is what it really should be called.”
* * *
"This is really cute."
I looked around me, at the gender-neutral theme they had going on. "Yeah it is."
Sheerah checked her watch. "They should be arriving any minute, so let's make ourselves scarce in the back, until we're ready to serve."
* * *
An hour later, after hiding out in the kitchen, the baby shower was in full effect. I was so busy with food prep, and making sure we never ran out of anything, I hadn't really had time to venture out. Who knew there would be this many people for a baby shower.
"Gwen, we're moving onto the main food, would you mind bringing it out?" I glanced up at Sheerah as I nodded, grabbing the tray, and heading out to the main area. I was halfway to the table, when all of a sudden I froze. The mom-to-be. I knew her. I felt myself starting to break out into a cold sweat. "Gwen, the tray, come on!"
I looked up at Sheerah. One foot in front of the other. One foot in front of the other. I can do this. I can do this. Don't look at her. Just don't look at her. I looked down at her belly. She was huge. Looked to be due any minute now, I would say. I didn't know much about due dates, but I would say she was going to pop in the next couple of weeks. Days even.
I finally set the tray down, and turned to leave. "What are you doing? You have to serve." I swallowed thickly. No. I needed to leave. Another lady came over to the table. I cleared my throat. "When is she due?" My voice came out small as I said it.
She looked back at the woman and smiled. "Oh, Celia? She's due next month." I looked back down at the tray in front of me. Suddenly someone let out a squeal followed by clapping, as Celia practically jumped into the arms of a man.
"You came!"
"Of course, I did, sweetie." He gave her a big hug, and everyone seemed to melt. Everyone but me. I stood frozen. I couldn't believe this shit. It was like my worst nightmare was coming true. I was catering a baby shower for my ex-boyfriend. The guy I was planning to marry, and had hoped to marry, and the woman he cheated on me with.
* * *
"We've been together a long time."
I watched as Blake played his video games. "Yeah. Few years now."
I smirked. "Going on five, but yeah. Do you ever think about, you know...the future?"
He sighed. "I just really want to finish school before I make a commitment to you first, Gwen. School first, and then marriage, and kids and all that, yeah?"
I smiled. "Yeah. Of course."
He gave me a chaste kiss on the cheek before turning back to his game.
* * *
"Sorry I'm late!" Another voice rang out, and my eyes shot up at the all too familiar voice. No fucking way. I watched as Celia walked right over to her, air kissing her on both cheeks.
"The food is just about to be served, you're just in time." I watched in horror as they made their way up to the table of food. The table that I was standing behind. They hadn't seen me yet, but I knew that any moment now, their eyes were going to meet mine, and I would be standing there looking like a damn fool.
"Everything looks so good. This pregnant mommy wants everything. What do you recommend?" Celia finally looked up at me, and paused. I stood there frozen, a pair of tongs in my hand.
"Celia, where are you sitting..." Blake's voice trailed off, as his eyes met mine. I could feel my eyes stinging with tears, but I'd be damned if I let them fall.
Blake finally cleared his throat, and spoke. "Vivian recommended Tea Lites." He motioned toward my mother, who stood just a few feet away, and didn't look the least bit sorry for being at my ex's baby shower. "If I had known you worked there, I would've never..."
I picked up a sandwich off the tray. "The roast beef is really good. I recommend the spicy peppers. Or if you don't like a little spice, the chicken salad is nice and light. The fruit that's in it, isn't overwhelming, and the tarragon really brings out the flavoring."
Blake gave me a subtle nod, as he pointed to the roast beef. He said a silent thank you. And the award for Most Awkward Performance goes to me! Move over, Meryl! Turn your Oscars over to me! My eyes focused as he gently caressed Celia’s belly as she leaned into him. I quickly turned my attention to the next person in line, hoping to make it through this.
After we finished serving everyone, I focused on making sure everything was stocked. I could hear the whispers, and feel the stares. All the while, I felt like throwing up. Out of the corner of my eye, my mom finally came over to me.
She let out a big sigh, as if this was all my fault that everyone was suddenly uncomfortable. "Gwenivere, I didn't know you would be catering." Bullshit.
I abruptly turned to Sheerah. "There's a cleanup crew coming to help, right?"
She nodded.
"Great! Mind if I take off?"
She looked over my shoulder at my mom, and leaned into me. "Take the weekend, I'll talk to you later." I nodded, thanking her. I took off my apron, and walked around everyone to get the hell out of there. I did my job. I played my part as hostess.
"Gwenivere, wait!"
I didn't slow down. If anything, I walked faster. But the more I walked, the more I was putting this off, so I suddenly stopped and faced her, which almost caused her to run into me. Her eyes widened when she looked at me. I was seething.
"How could you?" My voice was low.
"He's still part of the family, Gwenivere."
"Part of the family!” I scoffed. “You went to a baby shower, hosted by my ex-boyfriend and his wife! As if that wasn't stabbing me enough, you invited the company I work for to cater it, and I served them! Me! I served them!"
My mother rolled her eyes. "Gwenivere, you're overreacting."
"I am not overreacting! He broke my heart! He took my heart, ripped it from my chest, pissed on it, lit it on fire, then danced around it. He cheated on me, Mom. With her. With that woman in there." I pointed to the building as tears started to flow down my face. "And you being there shows that you don't give a damn about me." I wiped the tears that were freely flowing. "And you never have, and you've basically just lost a daughter."
Before she could say anything, I turned and walked away.
For good.
Six
Gwen
I headed home feeling like I had been run over. He was married. He gave me excuse after excuse as to why we couldn't get married. I fought like hell for our relationship, while he put in the bare minimum. When it finally ended, he moved his new girlfriend in six days after I moved out. My side of the bed wasn't even cold yet.
"I can't give you what you need,
Gwen. I can't do this. You're better off without me. Let's just end it now, before we end up hurting each other."
"So, what then? We just throw away five years for nothing? We made promises, Blake! You made promises! I waited. I always waited!" My lips trembled as I touched the promise ring on my finger. He couldn't even give me an actual ring. Just a promise ring that was clearly a lie.
"I'm sorry, Gwen, I don't know what you want me to say. You’re just not a right fit for me or my family.” He shrugged like it was no big deal. Like it was just another day for him.
It was March seventh. Three days before my birthday. Happy fucking birthday to me. "I have never felt more used in my entire life. For five years, you used me. Did you even love me, Blake? Did you love me like I loved you?” I watched as he stared at the ground. Then I thought back on how often I was excluded in his family activities. “I'll find a place and be out by the end of the month," I whispered.
He nodded, before going back to his video game. Like it was no big deal. I wanted to take that video game, and throw it out the damn window.
I managed to find an apartment, and be out two and a half weeks later. It wasn't a great apartment, but it was something. Mostly due to Blake pressuring me.
"Did you find something yet?"
"You know how places get snatched up very quick."
"Don't wait too long, Gwen."
"If you have to, maybe you can move in with your parents." I shot that idea down quickly.
"You have a car, don't you? Maybe you can sleep in your car for a while if you have to."
It was after that last remark, I took a semi-decent apartment. I sold my car to pay for the deposit. I didn't want to ask my parents for a penny. I refused.