by Marika Ray
I pulled my helmet off and set it on the bike, walking up to give Dad a hug. He didn’t thump me on the back like usual. “Rough day?”
He harrumphed and steered us to the door with his arm around my shoulder like he’d done since I was a little girl. “Yes. Very.”
My gut clenched, and I held myself back from checking his person for injuries. He’d hate for me to fuss over him. Besides, I knew Mom would do enough fussing for both of us. “Want to talk about it?”
“Damn budget meetings all damn day.” Dad drew his eyebrows together and then wheezed out a laugh. “If you say I’ve turned into an old house mouse, I will find a way to get your ass tied to a desk so you feel my pain.”
Relieved it was only budget meetings bothering him, I held my hands up in peace. “Hey, I never mentioned your desk jockey status. That was all you.”
His eyebrows were back to puckering up. “Desk jockey, huh? Least I’m not out there roping a bull.”
I bent over laughing at that. “Oh, you finally heard about that one, huh?”
“Hey! Are you coming in anytime soon or just shooting the crap out here all night?” Mom stood on the front porch, her apron on and her hands on her hips.
“Hi, Mom.” I climbed the steps and wrapped her in a hug, scooting away when I felt the wooden spoon flying close to my backside. Only had to connect a few times growing up before us girls knew to jump out of the way.
“Hey, darling,” Dad muttered to Mom. I stepped inside the house, not wanting to stick around to hear those two smooching. As far as any of us daughters were concerned, we were here on this green earth because of immaculate conception.
“Nice fashion choices, Oak,” Vee drawled from the couch, her hair curled perfectly in soft waves. She had a gold ring on every finger and a bare midriff.
“Since when did you start dressing yourself, little one?” I snapped back. She hated being reminded she was the baby. “What are you doing here so early? Dinner hasn’t even started yet.”
Vee rolled her eyes and pointed to Esme, who typed something out furiously on her cell phone from Dad’s recliner. “This bitch told me dinner was at six today.”
I bit back a grin. Leave it to Esme to find a solution for our baby sister’s perennial tardiness. I took my duty belt off and breathed a sigh of relief. That sucker was too bulky to keep wearing at the end of a shift. I laid it on the coffee table, careful not to scratch the wood and give Mom a proper reason to chase me with the spoon.
“The three of us have arrived!” Amelia hollered from the front door. She lumbered into the living room, already rubbing her belly even though she barely showed. The girl was milking this pregnancy for all it was worth. “Fair warning, Mom and Dad are sucking face again.”
All of us wrinkled our noses. Titus collapsed on the couch and pulled Amelia onto his lap.
“I think it’s adorable. You and I are going to be like that when we’re old.” He nuzzled Amelia’s neck, and for the first time, it didn’t make me sick to see my sister engaged in affection with her husband.
It made me want.
Izzy came into the living room, even her steps quiet. “Dinner might be awhile. Something about having a hard day?” She grimaced and shivered. “I don’t know. I didn’t stay long enough to find out what the deal was. Just don’t go out on the porch if you don’t want to have to bleach your eyes.”
We all snickered as it took a lot to get Izzy riled up, but our parents’ affectionate behavior was one thing that set her off.
“If by hard day you mean a bunch of paper cuts, then yeah, maybe we should just go in the kitchen and finish making dinner.” I snorted and Esme finally put her phone down.
“Dad said he just hired a new cop from some other part of the state. Said he’s grooming him to take over,” Esme announced, clasping her hands around her knee and her nose in the air.
I took a step forward. “Like, he’s thinking of retiring?” I couldn’t believe what my ears were hearing. Dad had been threatening to retire since I was in elementary school, but he never went through with it. He loved his job.
Izzy looked concerned. “Is he sick?”
Esme hopped up and put her arm around Izzy. “No! He just said it was time to start moving in that direction. He said something about leading the horse to calmer pastures.”
“That sounds like one of Dad’s ridiculous phrases,” Amelia piped in. “Maybe the threat of his first grandchild got him thinking about putting his time in elsewhere.”
“Speaking of putting in time elsewhere,” Esme drawled, “where have you been recently, Oak? Haven’t seen you around much lately. And why do you have this glow about you?”
All heads swiveled in my direction, making my cheeks heat despite how clenched I kept my jaw. Leave it to Esme to butt into my private business. The girl watched us all like a hawk, always putting the spotlight on our most insecure private moments like it was her damn job.
“I’ve been working,” I stated, glancing meaningfully down at my uniform.
“Oh, yes. With that hot cop, Wyatt.” Esme’s grin turned smarmy. She winked at me. “Did you hit that yet?”
“Esme!” Izzy whisper-shouted, appalled at her twin’s behavior.
I wasn’t appalled so much as pissed.
Esme threw her hands up in the air, but didn’t look apologetic at all. “What? That man could put me in cuffs any day of the week.”
My rage boiled over. “Stop talking about him that way! He’s my partner.”
Amelia got off Titus’s lap and came over to put her arm around my waist. “Hey, sis. Don’t let her get to you. If there’s something going on, we just want to know so we can hear about the hot sex. That’s all.” She giggled, and Titus folded his arms across his chest with a frown. “Not that I’m not getting it on the regular—I mean, I am knocked up—but I’m always up for an R-rated story time.”
“Oh! I have a hot story! I just started a new class and my professor is a super sexy silver fox.” Vee squealed and jumped up, ready to spill all the details of things we didn’t want to know about.
“Stop! You’re still a baby. We don’t want to hear it.” My cheeks had already betrayed me and I knew there was no way I could cut the conversation off now without all four sisters hounding me for weeks to come. Better to come clean. “Yes, I slept with him, and no, I’m not sharing details.”
All four erupted in squeals, surrounding me like a pack of hyenas.
“Was it hotter than hot?”
“Please, God, tell me he used the cuffs! Or maybe the baton?”
“Did you stay the night?”
“He seems like a big-dick-energy kind of guy. Am I right?”
“Girls!” I yelled, pushing their grabby hands away from me. “I’m not discussing it, and if you so much as bring it up around anyone but me, I will personally haul your ass to jail. Do not try me.”
Amelia pouted. Esme put her hands on her hips with a frown. Izzy sighed and looked dreamily out the window. Vee just kept smiling at me like she was about to burst.
“Jesus, take the wheel…” I muttered, rubbing my forehead.
The door clicked open and Mom clapped her hands, saving me from further discussion about Wyatt. “Come on, girls! The table won’t set itself!”
We all headed into the kitchen, Titus included. He’d learned that while he was definitely not one of the girls, he couldn’t escape chores. Mom had told him the second that ring was on Amelia’s finger that he was part of the family now, and that meant he wasn’t a guest. He grumbled about it all the time, but he kept coming over to help Mom and Dad with things around the house, sometimes even when Amelia wasn’t with him, so I had a feeling he didn’t mind being an honorary Waldo after all.
After the food was on the table, Dad pulled out a chair for Mom, giving her another kiss we all tried to ignore. Titus did the same with Amelia, sending an ache right through my chest. I saw the way they looked at each other, like the other person completed them in a way a single girl like
me just couldn’t understand.
We all dug into the food, and for a few minutes, no conversation was had. That happened frequently when partaking of the meals Mom cooked. The woman was a culinary genius. The ticktock of the antique clock Mom kept in her china hutch sounded louder than normal, setting off a crazy thought in my head.
My biological clock, the one I thought I didn’t even possess, began to tick away, the stroke of the minute hand ratcheting up my unease. My whole life, I’d wanted to be in law enforcement, serving my community and working my way up to management. One night with Wyatt and suddenly I didn’t want to do any of that if it meant I had to do it solo. I wanted a partner, at work and in life. I wanted it all: the career, the house, the husband, the baby showers, and the making out on the porch grossing out our kiddos.
I wasn’t sure what I ate after that, as it had all turned to dust in my mouth. I wasn’t sure if Wyatt was the one to give me all that, but for the first time in forever, I wanted to try. I was willing to sacrifice my job to have the rest of it.
Which meant tomorrow morning, I was coming clean to Sheriff Locke. Wyatt was out of time. If he and I were going to have anything together, it would be on a foundation of honesty or nothing at all.
16
Oakley
* * *
My heart felt like it was going to gallop right out of my chest. I’d arrived at work early, knowing the sheriff liked to get a head start on paperwork before the change of shift happened. I also wanted to beat Wyatt to work. If I saw him, he’d just flash that smile, give me a wink, and I’d be persuaded to give him more time. For what, I had no idea. Honestly, it was probably just bullshit. Which made what I was about to do even scarier. What if I was sacrificing my reputation for a guy who didn’t deserve me?
I knocked on the sheriff’s door and swiped my sweaty palm down my pants. So much for the crease I’d ironed into them this morning.
“Come in,” barked Sheriff Locke.
I pushed the door open and closed it behind me, having a seat across from his metal desk before I could talk myself out of confessing. The chair was cold, adding to my nerves and making me shiver.
“What can I help you with, Captain?” Sheriff Locke asked, looking up from his computer with a frown.
Maybe now wasn’t the best time to broach this subject. Maybe I should really think this through a bit more.
“Spill it before I have to go back to this infernal spreadsheet.”
I tried out a smile, but my cheeks didn’t participate.
“I, um, would like to request a transfer to another department.”
I cringed, not quite believing I’d put it out there. The air went fuzzy and my lungs had a hard time taking a full breath. My intention coming in here had been to ask for the sheriff to transfer Wyatt to a different department, but at the last second, I realized that was taking the easy way out. I wasn’t about to start being a pussy now. I was a cop, dammit. We did the hard things, and we did them without complaint.
The sheriff folded his hands on his desk and faced me fully. “Say what now?”
My knee started bouncing up and down. I had to push down with my palm to still it. “Well, you see. Funny thing happened. I actually enjoy having a partner. Good job calling my bluff on that one, by the way.” I gave him the double-gun hand gesture, but his eyebrows stayed pinched tighter than an asshole. I cleared my throat. “The problem is that I like my partner too much. I’d like to date Wyatt, sir. And I know that’s against department policy, so I’d like to transfer.”
The door behind me swung open so hard it hit the wall with a bang. I spun in my chair, hand already on my service weapon.
Wyatt.
His gaze bounced between me and Sheriff Locke. Then his expression cleared, and he shot us both a lazy smile.
“Did she pull the prank on you, sir? I told her it wouldn’t work. You’d see right through it.” Wyatt sauntered into the room.
“What are you—?” I tried to get the conversation back on track, but Wyatt wasn’t having it.
“April fool!” he shouted, cracking up. The life of the party.
Sheriff Locke finally unfroze and guffawed, standing and coming around his desk. He slapped Wyatt on the back and held his fist out to me.
I blinked, not quite sure what the hell was happening, other than realizing that maybe the joke was on me. What was today’s date? Oh fuck, it actually was April first. Weakly, I tapped my knuckles to Sheriff Locke’s and stood.
“I mean, that just went too far. Oakley would never fraternize with a deputy.” Wyatt smirked, the acting job going a little too far if you asked me.
I couldn’t salvage my original conversation with the sheriff, that was for sure. Instead, I smiled at my supposed April Fool’s joke and backed out of the room, pushing Wyatt out with me. When we got to the doorway, Sheriff Locke sat back down and glared at his computer screen.
“That was funny, but don’t pull that shit again. Get back to work, deputies.”
“Yes, sir!” I hurried to answer, shutting his door again and rounding on Wyatt.
“What. The. Actual. Fuck?” I whispered in his face, feeling like the heat in my cheeks was about to explode outward in the form of flames, consuming that smug smile on Wyatt’s face first, then his sexy forearms that distracted me to no end, and lastly, his stupidly talented cock that had gotten me into this mess in the first place.
He grabbed my arm and dragged me outside. As soon as we got to our cruiser, I pulled his middle finger backward and he let go of my arm with a yelp. My hands went to my hips, and I was ready to battle it out.
“Are you crazy?” I shouted.
I should have kept my voice down, considering where we were, but I couldn’t seem to help myself. This was why I kept myself on lockdown most of the time. Giving way to emotions and whims got people in trouble. It was how crimes were committed. I knew better than to take the lid off a boiling pot.
Wyatt put a hand out, probably ready to placate me like he always did. Smooth talkers always gonna talk. I wanted to hit that hand. Maybe even shoot his hand, I was so mad.
“Just get in the fucking car,” I growled, moving away from him to wrench the door open.
I got in and slammed the door shut. After a moment, he did the same, locking us into a small enclosed space where we’d have to work together all day. I couldn’t work with a partner while I was this upset with him. We needed to talk it out and settle things.
I spun in my bucket seat. “I wanted to come clean. I told you that was important to me and I gave you almost a week to sort out whatever business you had to attend to.” I used air quotes when I said business. The way his eyes heated and his jaw clenched told me he didn’t appreciate it.
“Maybe as partners, you should have consulted with me first before blowing up both our jobs. Isn’t that what true partners—at work or in a relationship—do?” The fucker gave me air quotes right back.
Well, shit. He had me there. Somehow that didn’t seem to cool the embers of my anger. I had a flash of Amelia and Titus, staring into each other’s eyes as they tried to feel the baby kick for the first time after we ate dinner last night. My heart clenched, and the anger died away, leaving an ache that was ten times worse.
I’d said honesty was important to me. It was time to walk the talk.
“Look, Wyatt. I want a partner in life. I want a house with a white picket fence and three-point-five children as crazy as my sisters. And I want the career. I want it all. But being honest is the only way to get any of that in a way that works for me. So, tell me what’s stopping you from telling the sheriff about us.” I grabbed his hand, rubbing my thumb across his solid knuckles. “Just tell me, Wyatt.”
The muscle in Wyatt’s jaw clenched over and over again, the silence drawing out. He finally squeezed my hand and let go, his gaze moving out the windshield.
“It’s just not that easy for me, Oakley. If I tell you everything now—well, let’s just say that will lead to bigger problems f
or us.”
I shook my head, thoroughly confused. “So…what? That’s it? We’re just done because you can’t be honest with me? You don’t even want to try?”
The dispatcher’s voice came through the radio. “We’ve got a situation out by the highway. Apparently Janey’s goats broke through the fence and are roaming around on the road. Already had one accident reported.”
I closed my eyes and inhaled deep. We had work to do. Our argument would simply have to wait.
“We’re on it,” Wyatt radioed back.
I flipped on the lights and headed out to Janey’s goat yoga property.
“This conversation isn’t over,” I said quietly.
Wyatt didn’t even answer me, just stared out the windshield as we whizzed past farmland. See? This was exactly why I shouldn’t make decisions based on emotion and impulse. Passion was a fickle beast, making you do things you’d never do otherwise. And when the passion fizzled, which it always did, what were you left with?
Disappointment.
17
Wyatt
* * *
Oakley went so deep into the ice-queen mode with me today, I was afraid my nuts would crack and fall right off. Damn, the woman knew how to put the frost in a conversation. Sure, I’d botched her chat with the sheriff, and basically given her no reason at all to trust that I wanted more than a casual fuck, but did she have to ice me out like that before I had a chance to explain?
Thankfully, we stayed busy all day with calls, ending our shift right on time and without a chance for more awkward conversations about feelings I hadn’t had a chance to even comprehend, let alone articulate. I still hadn’t decided what to do with Oakley and my past and our possible future. No matter which way I twisted things, Oakley and I having a future was feeling less and less like a possibility.