by Codi Gary
“I’ll make sure to keep up,” she said, starting off ahead of him, and he had to bite back a wave of irritation.
It’s not like I have cooties or something.
He tried to understand her reaction, to see it from her point of view, and caught up to her. “I’m sorry. It’s kind of hard not to touch you.”
She stopped and swung around, her eyebrow raised. “Considering we haven’t seen each other in ten years, it shouldn’t be too hard.”
“Maybe that’s what makes it so hard. When you spend years thinking and dreaming about someone and have them fall back into your life? Sounds like fate to me.”
His words shocked even him. Though it was true—he’d thought it was bizarre that they had run into each other—he was sure she’d take the sentiment as a line.
Only it hadn’t been rehearsed or even thought through; it had come straight from his heart.
I can’t do this. I can’t be that guy again, especially when she can barely stand to look at me.
Gemma’s pale face was pinched, and he said, “Gemma, I know you think something happened in Phoenix with that woman, but I swear nothing did. I have no reason to lie about it. I’ve already lost you, right?”
Her silence ate at him, and he almost offered to walk her back to her hotel room, but she surprised him. “I’m trying really hard to believe you, but it isn’t easy to just change your point of view in an hour.”
“I remember you used to get me to see things your way with little effort,” he said, teasing gently.
Her smile was small, but the tension around her eyes was gone. “I remember things differently. I spent a lot of time going along with whatever wild plan you cooked up for us.”
“I seem to remember that the idea for legendary Dreyer’s Ice Cream caper came from you. Mike, Gracie, and I were just along for the ride.”
She gasped and put her hands on her hips, drawing his gaze to the indentation of her waist.
“I said let’s get some ice cream! I didn’t say let’s shoplift a gallon in our jackets!”
“Nope, I remember it clearly. You were the first one out the door.”
“With no ice cream!” she said, shaking her head with a laugh. “You three snuck out, and I went back inside to pay for the two gallons Gracie and you took.”
“Just because you chickened out doesn’t mean it wasn’t your idea.”
“Wrong. If it was my idea, you wouldn’t have ended up with cookie dough ice cream crushed against the front of your T-shirt.”
He had to give her that one. By the time they’d gotten outside, the ice cream had started melting, and when Kirsten Winters had seen him in the parking lot and given him a huge hug, the ice cream had exploded under his jacket and oozed down his body. Gemma had thought it was hilarious, until he’d unzipped his jacket and chased after her with it.
This time when Travis reached for her, she didn’t jerk away. Smoothing his thumb over the back of her hand, he said, “There’s a lot of good history between us, and we were friends for a lot longer than we were lovers. Can you try to remember that and just come to lunch with me? I’m trying to make amends here, but it won’t work if you won’t meet me halfway.”
When she kept her hand in his, he squeezed it, and then started walking again, coming around the corner to see a bright green sign that read LA FIESTA.
They reached the little cantina, and a woman in a bright dress greeted them with a friendly smile.
“Table for two?” she asked.
“Actually, we’re in the VIP room. Reservation is for Bowers,” he said, smiling as her eyes widened.
“Of course, Mr. Bowers. Please follow me.” The hostess turned, swishing her ample hips in a sexy sway, but Travis ignored it.
They went through a pair of wooden double doors, and Gemma dropped his hand as they reached a large booth behind a heavy curtain. Sitting down, they took their menus from the hostess, and when Travis dismissed her with a smile, she left pouting.
“I think you hurt her feelings,” Gemma said dryly, but her expression was less than amused and Travis almost grinned.
She wouldn’t be irritated or jealous if there was nothing left between them, right?
“She’ll get over it.”
Gemma tucked her hair back and asked, “So, besides making nine awesome records, one chick flick, and dating a host of hot, famous women, what have you been up to?”
“Forget me; you can read about my life in the grocery store magazine aisle. I want to know about you. What do you do in Rock Canyon?”
Gemma hesitated before answering. “Miss Addie left me her used bookstore. I renamed it Chloe’s Book Nook,” she said.
Travis felt like she was holding something back but didn’t press her. Instead, he gave a little laugh. “Chloe? As in that ornery calico cat you had to have put down?”
“Hey, I loved that cat. She was only cranky because she was old and in pain.”
“Okay, okay. How come Miss Addie left it to you?” he asked.
“I got a job working there after you left,” Gemma said softly. “We were close.”
After you left. Had her tone been accusatory, or was he imagining things? “Well, that’s great. Are you seeing someone?” He asked.
Smooth, Bowers, very smooth.
Her expression was a little guarded, and disappointment pooled in the pit of his stomach. It had been ten years, and she was gorgeous. Of course she was with someone.
“No, not really. What about you?”
Pleased, he flashed her a wide grin. “Nope, not seeing anyone.” The silence stretched between them. “How are your parents?”
The small smile on her lips dissolved, replaced by sadness and pain. “My dad died of a heart attack.”
Reaching across the table, he took her hand. “Gemma, I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay; it’s been five years, and we were never really that close anyway,” she said, focusing on her menu.
Travis remembered how turbulent the relationship between Gemma and her dad had been. Dick Carlson had been the morning show host at the local radio station, and although he was amazing on the air, amiable and funny, he was the complete opposite at home. He’d once sat in her room listening to the old man scream at her for so long, it had taken all his willpower not to walk out there and deck him. Most of the time the guy had been okay, but when he was angry, her father was like the Hulk. Nobody wanted to see him like that.
Travis squeezed her hand, sorry that he’d brought it up.
“And your mom? Does she still live in town?” he asked.
“No. My mom moved to Boise to be closer to James, Drew, Dawn, and their families. She said she couldn’t stay alone in that house without Dad. So I took over her mortgage payments, got a loan, and now I’m a home owner. Yay, me.” Her laugh was a little forced, and it reminded him of all the times she’d brushed off a bullying comment someone had made about her. Gemma had always feigned indifference when he knew it really tore her up inside.
Wanting to get back the light atmosphere, he changed the subject. “Are you still friends with Mike and Gracie?”
“Yes, I am,” she said, her tone and demeanor brightening. “Gracie bought the coffee shop and renamed it The Local Bean, and Michael has his own computer business. We head out to Buck’s Shot Bar once a week for drinks, or to Hank’s for karaoke.” Smiling, she added, “You know, Buck still has a picture of you and the rest of the guys from the band up on his wall.”
Laughing, Travis said, “Ah, Buck’s. I miss that place. Used my first fake ID there, and he threw my ass out ten seconds later.”
“I remember. I had to come down and talk him out of calling the cops,” she said, shaking her head.
“I remember a pair of Toby Keith concert tickets being involved to bribe him. And you convinced him that he’d be better off using me for free entertainment.” He waggled his eyebrows. “Afterward, I believe we went down to that spot down by the river and you let me—”
“Travis!�
� Gemma blurted, squeezing his hand hard.
Laughing, he brought her hand up to his mouth and kissed her knuckles lightly, ignoring her attempt to jerk her hand back in surprise. “If it hadn’t been for you, I might not have made it out of high school, let alone had the career I’ve had. I owe you.”
Gemma’s eyes drifted down, but she stopped trying to pull away. “You deserved it. You’re very talented, Travis.”
“So, I take it you bought a couple of my CDS?” he asked.
“Try all of them and your movie. I thought they were amazing.” The smile she gave him was sweet and soft. How many times had he closed his eyes and seen that exact smile? Too many to count.
When they’d been friends, Gemma had been his biggest fan, pumping him up when he’d been ready to quit, and he’d adored her for it. In return, he would have died before letting anyone hurt her, and those that had dared had ended up with their asses kicked. If there was one thing he couldn’t stand, it was a bully.
Sure, he’d been just a dumb kid in love, but he was a man now, and those feelings were still there between them. If only he could get her to forgive him for not fighting harder. He should have followed her back to Rock Canyon and not given up until they’d at least had closure. They might not have stayed together anyway, but they wouldn’t be in this awkward limbo of polite conversation and stolen touches either.
But really, she should have believed me when I told her nothing had happened.
It was true they’d both made mistakes, but they’d both been young, too. And now they had both grown up.
Only one thing hadn’t changed: when he touched Gemma, she still felt like his.
AFTER THEY ORDERED, Travis continued to ask Gemma about what she’d been doing for the last ten years, and she was exhausted. She’d nearly mentioned Charlie half a dozen times. It was hard to hold back such a big part of her life, but the only other option was telling Travis.
His life is way too crazy to include a kid; what happens the first time he blows Charlie off for an interview?
The thought of her happy child being hurt sent cold fury through her body, strengthening her resolve. She wasn’t trying to be cruel, but she had to put Charlie first.
But is sitting here eating lunch with his dad putting Charlie first?
If he knew she’d seen Travis and didn’t tell him, Charlie would be brokenhearted anyway.
It was selfish of her to have said yes to Travis, but despite her reservations, there was still a pull for her. She was still drawn to him, and it was hard to fight, especially when he kept touching her, challenging every defense and reason she had for not trusting him. Like asking her about the last ten years, instead of dominating the conversation. What could she say that could possibly compare to the life he was living or the people he had met? They’d always been polar opposites in personality and social standing, but now it was like they were from two different planets.
Too bad her heart didn’t understand that. Every time he reached out to take her hand or gave her that crooked grin, her heart skipped, hopped, and jumped in her chest like a jackrabbit. It was as if she was seventeen years old again, staring into the eyes of the same nineteen-year-old guy she couldn’t seem to believe loved her. It had been one thing to be the unpopular sophomore with a penchant for romance novels befriended by the new junior with the killer blue eyes, but to be Travis’s girlfriend? To be his love? It had never made sense, but her dad had once told her, “Love doesn’t have to make sense. Love can be patient and kind, but it can also be a real bitch. Just try not to piss it off.”
My dad the philosopher.
Dick Carlson hadn’t always been angry and combative. He’d had his moments of humor and had been an excellent showman until his death. People around town had loved him and still missed him, but for his wife and children, the feelings had been mixed up and sometimes wrong. For Gemma especially, it was like a two-sided coin: heads—she loved and missed the funny guy who had taught her to fish; tails—she didn’t miss the awful times when he lost control and took his anger out on her, calling her his biggest disappointment.
Her brother James had graduated with a business degree and was the district manager for a grocery chain in the Boise area. Her sister Dawn had gone to nursing school in Colorado but moved back to Idaho after graduation, married a nice, successful lawyer, and was the perfect wife and mother. Drew, who was just three years older than Gemma, had been an all-around athlete, but his sweet spot had been football. After getting a full ride to Boise State, he’d been drafted to the NFL, and her dad had been over the moon.
Gemma hadn’t been athletic and had preferred books to extracurricular activities, but the first time she’d brought Travis home to study, her dad had puffed up proud. Tall and lean, Travis had played football, basketball, and the guitar like Brad Paisley, and her dad had thought he’d be a good influence on her.
Then again, he also used to ask Travis to take her running so she would lose some weight, and she’d wanted to die of embarrassment.
Travis had ignored those little digs while still being polite to her dad, but never too friendly. When the mean girls had said the only reason Travis was friends with her was because of what her dad did for a living, she hadn’t believed it. Most of the time. If that had been the case, he could have bailed on her any time after he signed with Off Road Records, but he hadn’t. It had been up to her to end things between them.
That night was still painful, still in the top three, coming in right after her dad kicking her out of the house when he found out she was pregnant and the night her mom had called to tell her he was dead.
The night she had ended things with Travis was a hard one to forget, especially when he sat across from her now, larger than life. She could feel Phoenix there between them, like the big pink elephant in the room that no one wanted to acknowledge.
The server came back with their food, and Gemma took the first bite of her burrito, moaning, “Damn, that is so good. I haven’t had Mexican food in forever. The flavor is so . . .” Travis’s smile caught her eye, and she asked, “What?”
Chuckling, he said, “Nothing. I just can’t believe you still make that noise. That little growling moan, like when you’d bite into those nasty Cadbury egg things. I would go to the store right before Easter and buy a ton of those things for you, remember?”
“Yes, I remember. I used to bitch at you that I didn’t need a hundred Cadbury eggs lying around, tempting me,” she said.
“I never knew what was so good about them. I always liked Peeps myself,” he said.
Gemma twisted her face into a look of disgust. “Peeps are vile.”
“And chocolate eggs filled with sugary cream aren’t?” he shot back.
“Nope, they are to be savored and enjoyed, like this burrito.” She took another bite, and said, “Mmm, mmm, mmm.”
She hardly ever ate Mexican anymore, and when she did, it was usually a taco salad or tostada. Becoming Fat Gemma again was always in the back of her mind when she ate anything, and she hated it. Every humiliating childhood moment seemed to haunt her when she ate something unhealthy. The boys who’d made pig noises in high school, or when Bobby Gillingham had taken her to homecoming only because he’d lost a bet and then ditched her when they arrived. Or when she’d had Travis, Mike, and Gracie over for her birthday, and her dad had told her mother she didn’t need a cake. Or the girls in their little booty shorts at the fair, who’d flirted with Travis in front of her like she wasn’t there.
Through it all, Travis had been her champion. Pulling her onto the dance floor in front of Bobby and everyone else to dance like a dork, despite his date’s angry glares. Telling her dad that he thought she looked great and, the next day, taking her to Jensen’s for a large piece of chocolate pie. And Travis wrapping his arm around her shoulders and introducing her to those thin, pretty girls, by saying, “This is my girlfriend, Gemma.”
He had always surprised her with his ability to look people in the eye, say whatever h
e wanted, and not care what they thought. She’d spent most of her life just trying to stay invisible so she wouldn’t be made fun of, so Travis’s confidence had been a big draw for her. It had been hard to believe he’d wanted that girl ten years ago. As for wanting her now, Travis was a flirt and obviously hadn’t changed.
“People make noises when they eat,” Gemma said, blushing at the way her thoughts had shifted. Travis hadn’t said anything except that he was sorry about the way they’d parted and wanted to catch up. With all the women in the world undoubtedly throwing themselves at him, why would he be into her now?
Because when he touched my hand, I felt it. That spark is still there.
The problem with sparks was that they were both bright and short-lived. She needed to remember that.
Gemma suddenly realized Travis was speaking and she’d missed it. “I’m sorry, what?”
His grin was mischievous. “I said people might make noises, but your food noises are the same as the noises you used to make right before you—”
Her fork dropped onto the plate loudly, and she squeaked, “Travis!”
Innocent blue eyes stared back at her. “What? I was going to say before you bought a new book.”
“Uh-huh. Don’t play innocent with me! You always had a dirty mind, but I’m sorry to see you haven’t matured,” she said.
UGH, I AM so full, I’m going to bust out of my skirt.
A bit later, Gemma set down her fork with a sigh. “That was amazing.”
“It was a burrito,” Travis teased, taking the last bite of his fajitas.
“It was an amazing burrito,” she countered as she watched the server approach. The woman’s bold gaze was eating Travis alive, and Gemma wished she could send her packing with one of Gracie’s sharp quips.
“Hello, folks. Did we save room for dessert?” she asked Travis, barely glancing at Gemma.
Travis raised his eyebrow at her, and she shook her head. “I’ll explode. I swear. Like the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man at the end of Ghostbusters.”
“And with that mental picture, I think we’re good,” Travis joked, reaching for his wallet and handing the server his card.