nutritious. And very expensive.”
“How did you do it?” I asked. I was
impressed.
She shrugged. “No sweat,” she said.
23
“Anyone could do it.”
“But I searched for days, and I couldn’t find
it,” I said.
“I’m sure you would have found it ...
someday,” Pinky said. Her eyes
TWINKLED
.
“Maybe I could use your help after all,” I
muttered. “Just for small jobs, of course.”
“Give me another problem!” Pinky shouted.
“I’m ready to go!”
I covered my ears. “Calm down!” I cried.
“Your voice is
L
O
U
D
E
R
than your
outfit.”
I looked through my notes. “Here is
something,” I said. “Fuzzy Fuzzborn is in
town. The ROCK singer. Every
reporter in town wants to interview him.”
I am not a big fan of Fuzzy Fuzzborn’s. As I
said before, I don’t like loud rock music. But
he is one of the most popular mice on Mouse
Island. An interview with Fuzzy would be
great for The Rodent’s Gazette. There was
only one problem.
“Fuzzy never gives interviews,” I told
Pinky. “He is a pretty cranky rat. Not
even you could handle this one. No
one can! I will find something else.”
But Pinky had already strapped on
her IN-LINE SKATES. She pushed off
my desk and zoomed toward the
door.
“ONE INTERVIEW,
COMING UP!” she cried.
I tried to jump out of the
way. But there was no
time.
That little mouse
skated right over
my tail!
25
TRICKS OF THE
TRADE
Pinky skated in two hours later. “Here’s
your interview, Boss,” she said. “I even took
pictures of him!”
I was shocked. “But Fuzzy Fuzzborn
never gives interviews. To anyone!”
I squeaked. “
How did you do it?
”
Pinky sat down. She
plopped
her
big platform sneakers on my desk.
“Take your fishy footwear off my desk!” I
cried.
“All right, all right,” Pinky said, lowering
her paws. “Don’t get your fur
frazzled
, Boss.
Don’t you want to read the interview?”
To tell the truth, I wanted to read the
interview very badly. An interview with Fuzzy
Pinky took a signed photo of Fuzzy out of her
backpack.
27
Fuzzborn! What a SCOOP! But I didn’t
want Pinky Pick to see how EXCITED I
was. She might get the wrong idea. Like that
I actually wanted her to be my assistant.
Pinky winked at me. “Let me tell you all
about it, Uncle Geronimo,” she said.
“Uncle? How dare you call me that!” I
shrieked.
“OK,” said Pinky. “How about Pops?”
“You can’t call me Pops, either!” I said.
“Call me Mr. Stilton. I am your boss, after
all.”
As soon as I’d uttered the word boss, I
realized my mistake. But it was too late.
“Aha!” Pinky said. “If you are my boss, that
means I am your new assistant. Right?”
“Fine, fine!” I said. The little mouse
had finally worn me down.
“Just
show me the interview, please!”
At that moment, my sister, Thea, ran into
the office. Thea is a special correspondent for
The Rodent’s Gazette. She knows everything
that happens in New Mouse City.
Thea ran up to Pinky and shook her paw.
“GOOD job, kid! ” my sister said. “I heard
about the interview with Fuzzy. How did
you do it?”
Pinky grinned. “Check this out,” she said.
She took alarge photo of Fuzzy Fuzzborn out
of her backpack. Fuzzy had signed it:
To Pinky Pick, the most adorable,
fabumouse, smartest mouse on
Mouse Island.
29
“This is how I did it,” Pinky said. “I wrote
him a letter. It went like this:
Dear Fuzzy,
I am your biggest fan! I know all of your songs by heart.
I have covered thewallsin my roomwith your pictures.
When I grow up, I want to be just like you!
“Then I added some details,” Pinky went
on. “I said I had a mean boss who made me
work day and night for no pay. I told him you
forced me to interview him or you would
fire me.”
I couldn’t believe it. Such lies! I had not
forced Pinky to do anything. She was the one
who forced herself on me!
“Well, I never—” I began. But the phone
rang before I could finish. I picked it up.
“Hello. Is this Stilton, Geronimo Stilton?”
the caller asked.
I recognized the voice right away. It was
Fuzzy Fuzzborn!
“Yes, I am Geronimo Stilton,” I said. I was
EXCITED. “I am so pleased you did an
interview for our paper, Mr. Fuzzborn.”
“I only did it to help out that sweet little
mouse who works for you!” Fuzzy snapped.
“Shame on you! How dare you make her
work day and night! What kind of a terrible
boss are you? She is just a little mouselet!”
I started to tell him the truth, but Pinky
slapped her
paw
over my mouth.
“Oh, my assistant has a great imagination,”
I managed to mumble. “I am sure she was
stretching the truth a bit.”
But Fuzzy did not believe me.
“Shame on you, Stilton!”
he squeaked.
31
HOW
EMBARRASSING!
Fuzzy was shouting.
How embarrassing!
Fuzzy Fuzzborn was one of the most
famouse rats on Mouse Island. And he
thought I was a first-class creep ! What if he
started spreading Pinky’s story around? My
reputation would be ruined. And it was all
Pinky’s fault.
That’s it, I decided. I
can’t have this meddling
mouse as my assistant.
“
Y
o
u
s
t
i
n
k
w
o
r
s
e
t
h
a
n
a
h
u
n
k
o
f
r
o
t
t
e
n
c
h
e
e
s
e
,
S
t
i
l
t
o
n
!
”
BEFORE I COULD SAY
ANYTHING, Pinky pressed the
speaker button on my phone. Fuzzy’s voice
rang out through the office.
“And another thing, Stilton,” Fuzzy said.
“That little assistant of yours is a genius! Her
interview was brilliant. She really understands
me and my music. I am thinking of letting
her write my biography.”
All thoughts of firing Pinky left my brain.
Fuzzy Fuzzborn’s biography? That was an
even bigger S
C
O
O
P
than the interview!
Pinky Pick grinned. She sat down and put
her big shoes on my desk.
I motioned for her to move
her paws.
She didn’t. Instead, she
made a face
at me!
32
33
THE DAILY RAT
I started thinking about firing Pinky again.
Biography or not, she was just too much!
Fuzzy was still talking. “You are lucky to
have an assistant like
PINKY PICK
,
Stilton,” he said. “I am sure she could teach
you a thing or two. You’d better keep her
happy or you might lose her!”
“Of course, Fuzzy. Of course,” I said. But
inside I was still fuming.
Fuzzy finally hung up. Pinky jumped out of
her seat.
“I think it’s time for a raise, Boss!” she
shouted.
My furry face flushed red . “RAISE!” I
shrieked. “But I just HiReD you!”
Pinky winked at me. “Too bad. I guess I
34
could always go work for the competition.”
I turned as PALE as a piece of mozzarella.
The Daily Rat was my biggest competition in
New Mouse City. If Pinky worked there, they
would get the Fuzzy Fuzz born interview. And
the biography. I gulped.
“Now, don’t be hasty, Pinky,” I said. “Aren’t
you happy here at The Rodent’s Gazette with
your uncle Gerry? ”
Pinky smiled. “Here’s the deal,” she said,
slapping her paws on my desk. “I want a
huge . . .no, a mega-huge bonus each year.
I love to travel, so I also need
three months of paid vacation.
And I want all my expenses
paid, including my clothes. I
need to keep up with the
latest trends.” She pointed to
her BAGGY sweatshirt.
35
“Well, that’s all very expensive,”I said.
Pinky sat downand folded her arms behind
her head. “I understand, Boss. If you don’t
like the deal, I can always go somewhere
else. I already have an idea for Fuzzborn’s
biography.”
Pinky’s gaze moved to the top of my desk.
A copy of The Daily Rat stared up at us.
I would not let them scoopme
with the Fuzzy Fuzzborn story. I could not
let that happen!
“Whatever you want, Pinky,” I said.
“Whatever you want!”
36
THE ASSISTANT’S
ASSISTANT
So it was all settled. Pinky Pick was my new
assistant. The Rodent’s Gazette was going to get
the Fuzzy Fuzzborn interview and biography.
I arrived at my office early the next morning,
ready for a calm and peaceful day.
But I had not even finished my cheese pastry
when Pinky Pick burst through my door.
“I have NEWS, Boss!” she squeaked.
“NEWS about Fuzzy?” I asked hopefully.
“No, there is more NEWS, "she said."Come"
on, ask me what it is.”
"All right, Pinky” I said. “What is it?”
Pinky moved to one side. “Ta-da!” she
shouted.
A small female mouse stepped out from
37
behind Pinky. She looked like she was about
fourteen, too.
I asked.
“My name is
MerryMelody
,” she said
shyly.
“Shouldn’t you be in school?” I asked.
Pinky laughed. “It’s CHRISTMAS vacation!
There is no school. By the way, this is Merry—
my new assistant !”
“Assistant!” I shouted. “Who said you were
allowed to have an assistant?”
Pinky did not answer.Instead,she unhooked
the
bi
g diar
y
from her backpack. She
OPENED
it up to reveal a built-in
CALCULATOR.
“Hmm,” she said, punching in numbers.
“With Merry’s help, I could write Fuzzy’s
biography faster. I could do it in one month
instead of two!”
“
W
H
O
A
R
E
Y
O
U
?
”
A CHEESE-SCENTED
DIARY
Pinky had my attention. Of course, it was
ridiculous for an assistant to have an assistant.
But if Fuzzy’sbiography could get done faster
that way...
“All right,” I said. “But how much will your
assistant cost me?”
Pinky whispered a number in my ear.
“Holey cheese!” I cried in
HORROR. “I could buy a lifetime supply of
cheddar with that kind of money!”
Then Pinky whispered something else in
my ear.
“wha t?” I asked. “How much did
The Daily Ratoffer you?”
I had no choice. I had to hire Merry or lose
Pinky—and Fuzzy Fuzzborn—to The Daily
Rat.
The morning had been much too
40
exciting for me. I wanted to forget about
Pinky Pick—just for a little while. So later
that day, I called a meeting of my staff at the
publishing house.
I asked my sales manager for a report. “We
need to make new products,” Shif T. Paws
said. “Something MODERN. Something
exciting . Something for today’s youth.”
From behind me, a small voice said,
I cringed. Pinky Pick ran into the room,
carrying a stack of papers.
“How about a diary with cheese-scented
pages? A series of biographies on rock
singers? Or a backpack on wheels?” she
asked. “And here’s the best idea of all. We
should publish a magazine for young mice.
We can call it FOr KidS Only. And I
think the right rodent for the job is . . . me!”
“
N
o
p
r
o
b
l
e
m
!
I
h
a
v
e
l
o
t
s
o
f
i
d
e
a
s
!
”
41
HOW COULD YOU?
My staff gobbled up
Pinky’s IDEAS like
hungry rats at an all-
you-can-eat cheese
bar. I had to admit,
her ideas were all
pretty good.
We started production
on everything. The cheese-scented
diary. The magazine. It all sold like
crazy.
I started to think that hiring Pinky
Pick was not such a bad idea after all.
Sure, she is loud .And pushy. And wears
ridiculous clothes, I told myself. But she
knows how to make money for this company!
My mouse-gray walls had been splattered with paint!
43
So I had a smile on my snout as I walked
into my building a few days later. I opened
my office door and stepped inside.
For a second, I thought I had gone through
the wrong door. The room looked like Pinky’s
office.
But then I saw my desk, my papers, my
cheese-shaped paperweight....
“CHEESE NIBLETS!” I shrieked.
“Pinky, what have you done?”
My lovely mouse-gray walls had been
splattered with paint. Lines, squiggles, and
doodles in bright colors stared back
at me. Red, blue, yellow, green, purple, and
pink. Shocking PINK ,of course!
Pinky ran into the room, waving a spray
can. “How do you like it, Boss?” she asked.
“I did it for free. Because I like you!”
“If you really liked me, you would have left
my office alone!” I
W AILED
.
Just then, Merry flung open the door. She
rushed into the room.
The door slaMMed into my snout.
I fell against the coat stand. The stand fell
on my head.
I stumbled. One pawlanded in the
umbrella stand. The other paw landed on
top of the computer plug.
A
S HO CK
of electricity raced
through me.
“Yeeow!” I shrieked. My fur stood on end.
I broke away from the plug and slammed
into Pinky. Her spray can went off, and orange
paint sprayed my snout.
My Name Is Stilton, Geronimo Stilton Page 2