by Amanda Frame
“It might just be able to latch onto another person. I feel like that’s probably not the case, though. I’ve observed them a few more times and it seems like they have some kind of co-dependent, parasitic relationship.”
“This is stupid,” I said after a moment, standing up from the couch. “I’m gonna go talk to him again. Can we meet up again tomorrow?”
She sighed. “Sure. You’re going now?” she asked, frustration clear in her voice.
“Might as well. I have nothing better to do.” I did have a job interview coming up. Was that tomorrow? I couldn’t keep the days straight. Maybe a job would stop me from feeling so useless. And broke.
She faded out without a word.
CHAPTER 52
ELIZABETH
I watched through the window. I could only see Anna. I shifted from side to side, trying to get a look at the man. Maybe I could read their lips if I could just get in a position where I could see them both. They turned a corner and I could no longer see Anna either.
“Crap,” I whispered.
Now was my chance. I faded out as much as I could, watching the world break down in front of me. The door knocker rusted, the wood around it rotting and moldy. The siding on the house was cracked and gray. The furniture I had been able to see in the living room just moments before was gone.
I opened the door slowly and crept inside. My fingertips sank into the rotting wood and some of the door crumbled as I began to shut it. I could see the vague overlap of the door on the physical side, out of sync with the decrepit one in the Echo. One closing slowly behind me, the other still shut, unmoved from Anna’s perspective.
I crouched behind the wall next to the entrance to the kitchen, where I had seen the two of them go a few minutes ago, and faded back toward the physical. Anna, and maybe John too, would be able to see me now, so I waited a moment before peering around the corner. I could hear Anna telling him what I had told her about how luring the Stalker away from Brian might break the bond. I listened for his response.
“And how would we even do that? There’s nothing that I can think of that it would be interested enough in to detach itself from Brian except maybe one of us, and I’m not willing to risk that.”
My mouth dropped open. I knew that voice.
“Albert?” I whispered in disbelief, standing up and turning the corner to face them.
They both whipped around toward me. He met my gaze and I saw a flood of emotion in his eyes once recognition hit. Surprise, resignation, shame. But most prominently, guilt.
“I knew it would be you,” he said, dropping his eyes.
“What’s going on?” Anna asked, looking back and forth between us.
“You…you’re the boy. Ten years ago. How…” I didn’t know what to say.
“Yes,” he said, eyes still lowered, shame in his voice.
Anger hit me. Fresh anger, the same as when I felt the connection between Albert and his body break. I couldn’t speak. There was no question I could think to ask that I didn’t already know the answer to. Why did he do it? Because he wanted to escape, same as the rest of us. How did he do it? Neither of us knew.
“You killed him,” I said, voice dangerously calm, holding the rage back.
“I didn’t! I heard your conversation with him. It might have been ten years ago, but it’s still there. He was almost gone, he said so himself. He couldn’t use his body anymore!”
He pleaded for my understanding but it was tinged with guilt. He doubted his own words.
“Oh my God,” Anna said, understanding washing over her. “This is why you didn’t want her to help us! It had nothing to do with being worried about me!”
“I admit that this was a part of it, but I still think the plan is dangerous,” John said, a different shade of guilt this time. The one that came with being caught in a lie.
“I can’t believe you! You’re so selfish! You would sacrifice Brian’s sanity so you didn’t have to face your past? Maybe it’s about time! I knew you’d done something horrible to get that body!”
“Anna, please, you have to understand…” He took a step towards her, reaching out, but she turned away, tears in her eyes.
“No. I trusted you. You promised to help me because you think it’s partly your fault. You could have at least atoned for one mistake you made.”
What did that mean? My anger ebbed a bit.
“What mistake?” I asked.
“I accidentally let the Leech out because I crossed into the Void without meaning to. John thinks the reason I started being able to do that in the first place was because he made the barrier thinner. By going in and out so much,” she answered, sniffling.
“Why would you do that?” I asked John, my voice still quivering with rage and suspicion.
“Go back all the time?” He sighed. “It’s how I keep my astral alive. I need to kill Leeches.” His lip curled up at the end of his sentence. He was disgusted with himself. I saw the same disgust mirrored on Anna’s face. Clearly she hadn’t known this either.
“How are you still alive? After more than ten years?” he asked.
“I just am. I don’t know. I think it’s because I’m still connected to my body. I certainly don’t have to kill anything.”
“Don’t they try to kill you?” Anna asked, still refusing to look at John.
“They would, but I can protect myself from them. I can fade next to the physical like I am now. They can’t touch me here. And I use the water to keep them away from the ICU.”
“The water?”
“Yes,” I answered her. “The water drains them, I don’t know why, but they avoid it. I saw a Stalker fall in once. It didn’t have the energy to get out and drowned.”
I spared a look at John. Realization passed over his face.
“So have you…” John began to ask me another question but I cut him off.
“I can’t just stand here and have a casual conversation with you. When I look at you, I still see him. And what you did.”
“I need to go too,” Anna said. “I can’t…” She just shook her head and left, slamming the front door behind her.
John looked devastated. So much regret in his eyes. I almost felt sorry for him. Almost.
“I didn’t mean to do what I did ten years ago. I felt…life…within my reach when I stepped into that hospital, and I was so drawn to it that I didn’t even know what was happening. Or the consequences of what I was doing. I didn’t even realize what was going to happen when I touched him. I had lived in hell for a year. I was losing my humanity. I hadn’t touched or spoken to another human being in so long. You had other people. Friends. You can obviously see this world. Could you do that then? I had none of that. I was alone. Miserable. Killing monsters to survive. I am so sorry. So, so sorry.” He looked away, trying to hide the tears in his eyes. As much as I wanted to hate him, I pitied him. I tried to shake the feeling away but I couldn’t.
“I need to go,” I said. I didn’t want him to see the emotion.
“But…”
I faded out. I couldn’t be here anymore. The mixed feelings were killing me. I left him with his remorse. How could I forgive him if he didn’t even forgive himself?
~
I sat cross-legged next to the slide on my favorite playground, leaning back against the rusted metal. I had been going over what John had said over and over in my mind for the last two hours. I didn’t want to but I couldn’t help it.
How would I have felt if I was alone? I had discovered other people pretty shortly after I had arrived in the Barrier. My ability to fade had come pretty quickly as well, the years of intense meditative control over my mind and spirt in the physical world becoming invaluable.
By myself for a year? I would have gone crazy. And he had to kill Stalkers to stay alive? How did he even figure that out? What happened after he killed them that kept him alive? I shuddered. I imagined him eating their flesh. No. No. I would die before I resorted to that. But would I? Self-preservation is s
o ingrained in humanity, in all creatures. If I figured out that would keep me alive, maybe I would do it. There were stories about people cutting off their own limbs to save themselves. I’d hear that and think, I could never do that. But I could if I had to.
He felt a way back, a connection to humanity, and was so desperate for it that he seemed to be in a trance, unable to stop what he was doing. He didn’t know the consequences of his actions. And Albert was happy to go. He was done with this place. I was mad because I missed him and didn’t get to say goodbye. I hated to admit it, but my anger was selfish.
I sighed and rested my head back, staring up at the dirty yellow sky. The withered trees. I felt brittle, dead grass tickling my skin, growing in sand that felt thick and dirty. I wasn’t stuck here. Well, I was, but not the way John had been. I could fade to watch people in the physical world whenever I wanted. I didn’t have to fear Stalkers most of the time. He must have had to be on constant alert, never knowing when violence and death would come for him. It was no wonder that he did what he had. He hadn’t stolen a body; he had found a door out of hell.
I understood.
I groaned, realizing I was beginning to forgive him. I needed to help him and Anna. Like she’d said, he could at least atone for one of the mistakes he had made. I wasn’t going to let the second chance at life that Albert had given him go to waste. He was going to help Brian. And maybe once he had, he would help me, too.
CHAPTER 53
ANNA
“Anna.”
I squealed and jumped up from my bed, my moping cut short. I wiped the tears from my eyes and saw the fluctuating form of Liz standing in my bedroom door.
“You okay, honey?” I heard my mom yell from downstairs.
“I’m fine!”
I heard her footsteps coming up the stairs. She knocked on the door.
“Are you sure? Do you need some help? I can get Dad to help you with some potential questions. He’d be good at that.”
“No thanks, Mom. I got it.” I had told her I was prepping for my interview scheduled for tomorrow.
“Okay. Well, let me know if you change your mind,” she said, and walked away.
“What are you doing here?” I whispered. “My parents are home.”
“Sorry,” she said. “I wanted to talk to you.” Her demeanor was different than the last time I had seen her.
“What is it?”
“I want to help you.”
“Really?” I was surprised.
“Yes, I think we can do this. I think Brian still has a chance.”
“Oh, thank God!” Hope spread through me. But also doubt. “I don’t know much about the Void. I haven’t tried traveling there by myself yet. I don’t know how much I can help without John.”
“We need him, too.”
“What?” I was shocked. “Don’t you hate him? Why would you be willing to work with him after what he did?”
“We both need to forgive him. I think I already have,” she stated with a shrug.
“Are you serious? Just like that?”
“No, not just like that. After you left, we talked some more. I understand what he did and why he did it. I hate myself a little for accepting it, but I’ve harbored this anger for ten years and it’s time to let it go and realize that he deserves some understanding.”
“Seriously? Okay, well he totally lied to me. Why should I forgive him?” I didn’t think I could get over it as easily as she appeared to have.
“He was scared. I don’t agree with how he handled that, but you should at least try to put it aside for now if you—if we have any chance of saving Brian.”
She sounded determined. It was hard not to let it resonate.
“Okay. I’ll try. I still need some time,” I said, resigned to the fact that this was going to happen.
“I completely understand. Took me ten years. Can we meet up tomorrow morning? Will your parents let you go over John’s house again?”
“Yeah,” I said, “they think he’s getting too old to take care of himself so they think I’m, like, his helper or whatever. They encourage it.”
“Okay, that works out then. Go over there around…ten o’clock? I’ll meet you inside, presuming he’s home and lets you in.”
“Yeah, sure,” I said.
I was still angry but trying to not let it leak into my voice. She was right. If we had any chance of saving Brian, I had to let the feeling of betrayal go for now, although I didn’t know if John deserved it.
CHAPTER 54
ELIZABETH
We stood in John’s kitchen. He looked at us with nervous expectation. I glanced at Anna, who was still avoiding looking at him, arms crossed, mouth set in a thin line, looking pissed.
“I’ll still help you,” I stated.
“You will?” John asked, shocked.
“I refuse to let you cut another life short. One time is more than enough,” I said. Although I forgave him, I didn’t want him to know it yet. My words sounded cruel and he flinched, but I wanted his guilt to spur him into action.
“Besides, I have an idea,” I continued.
They listened intensely, absorbing every word. Nodding along in the right places, asking questions and throwing in their own suggestions. When we finally came to a conclusion, it was quiet for a while, each of us pondering our own role in the plan. John broke the silence.
“You really think you can do that?” John asked.
“Yes. It’ll take a lot of effort, but I think I can. I’ve taken things deeper into the Barrier with me before. I’ve never tried doing it with water, though. Hopefully it works the same way and will have the same effect on the Stalker.”
“What if it, like, eats you or something? I mean, that’s what they do, right?” Anna interjected.
“Well, not exactly, but I guess you could say that. Maybe it would be the end of me, but that’s what I want anyway. It’s not the way I would prefer to go, obviously, and I need to finish my part first. Albert seemed so peaceful when he faded. I’d rather have that experience than be terrified.”
“We will do everything in our power to not let that happen,” John said. I couldn’t trust him, though. Not quite yet. “If we can get you away from it in time, you should be fine.”
“That’s a big if. This whole plan is built on assumptions. One is bound not to be correct,” I said.
“That’s not true. We know a few things for sure.” He began ticking off on his fingers. “A. An astral, or soul as you call it, can only be in the Barrier if it is connected to a body. Therefore, if we cut its connection to Brian’s body, it shouldn’t be able to survive, same as what happened to Albert.” John’s cheeks flushed in shame as he said this.
“Again, that’s an assumption. We don’t know that the same rules apply to the Stalker.”
“Okay, so for the sake of optimism, let’s pretend it’s true,” John said. I rolled my eyes.
“B. Water weakens the Leeches.” I opened my mouth to propose the same argument. He cut me off.
“We know that’s true. There is no reason it wouldn’t be the case in this situation. C. Distance should break the bond between it and Brian, as it does between a person’s echo and a Leech in the Void. The water should make it easier. And D, I will admit is an assumption. It will probably be too weak to latch onto one of us.”
Anna raised her hand. “So how I am supposed to kidnap Brian?”
John groaned. “For the sixteenth time, you are not kidnapping him.”
Anna shrugged. “He hates me. How else am I supposed to do it?”
“She’s right. Maybe we should just knock him out or something,” I interjected.
“Oh my God, you guys. There has to be a way to do this without committing a felony,” John said, exasperated, pacing the kitchen.
Anna sat up straighter. “He had a drinking problem for a while. Or that’s what the rumor going around was.”
“Okay, we might be able to use…” he started, then fell to a heap on the tile.
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Anna gasped and jumped up.
“What the…” I began, then I saw him. The boy. A weak image of him. He was on the other side. He was looking around, confused. He squinted at me. He must have been able to see a faint outline of me. I was pressed up against the physical, far away from where he was.
“Oh my God, John!” Anna rushed over, kneeling next to him.
“It’s okay. I see him,” I said, trying to be reassuring. She just looked at me, not understanding. “Just wait here, I’ll be right back.” I faded out, back toward the Echo. We could now see each other clearly.
“Welp,” he said, shrugging.
“What happened?” I asked.
“I’m beginning to lose connection to this body…Albert. This has been happening a lot. I was hoping Anna wouldn’t be around to see it. I should be able to get back in it in a sec.”
“How often does this happen?” His soul looked worn and battered. Much different than the first time I had seen him.
“At least three times a day. It’s getting more frequent. I think it’s because I need so much energy to keep the body alive. As you know, it was effectively dead when I took it, and it’s only continuing to age. It’s way past its expiration date…sorry, not trying to be insensitive.”
I could see the reflection of Albert’s body, waning in and out, and conflicting emotions rose in me again. I kept telling myself that I had forgiven John… mostly. I summoned up the calming meditative state that I spent years teaching my former clients.
He waited until the image of the body solidified and stopped flickering, then reached toward it, as I had seen him do once before. I faded back to Anna before I could witness it again.
She came into focus, sniffling and terrified. John stood up, wobbling a bit. She jumped up and helped him to his feet.
“Are you okay?” she asked.
“I’m fine. Just lost the connection for a moment. No big deal.” He tried on a reassuring smile. Anna looked skeptical.
After John took a moment to rest, we talked a bit more, changing a few details.