“No, but I had a cousin. After my parents died, his parents took me in, and he might as well have been my brother.” Jaxon smiled. “Andre’s the shit.”
“Andre...” Freya peered at him.
He watched her face, waiting for the moment it would click.
“Andre from the coffee place, Andre?”
“That’s the one.” He sighed. Comparing himself to Andre was inevitable.
“What’s that look for?” Freya asked.
“Nothing...”
She tilted her head to the side. He didn’t need the light to know her expression was frustrated.
He’d told her about his parents, wasn’t that enough honesty for one night?
“It’s hard having someone that perfect in your life when you’re the fuck up.” Jaxon sighed. “Everyone loves Andre.”
“You are not a fuck up,” Freya said.
“You don’t know that.”
“I’ve known you a year. You’re the most honest, upstanding guy I know.”
“Then you don’t know enough people. I’m not all that great.”
“I’m not buying it.”
“You watched me nearly beat a man to death, and you think I’m some sort of good guy?”
“But... You didn’t...”
“No, I didn’t, but I could have, and that’s about as bad.”
“It’s not the same.”
“You’re fooling yourself if you think I’m some sort of good guy.” If it weren’t for Andre, Jaxon’s life would be different. He’d trusted the wrong people. Been loyal to those who hadn’t deserved it. It’d been Andre there who’d pulled his ass out of the fire. “I’ve done things I’m not proud of.”
“Good people do bad things, Jax. It happens every day. Get over it.”
“You don’t know—”
“I don’t have to.” She lifted a shoulder. “You know one of the things that I find most attractive about you? You’d give someone the shirt off your back if they needed it. People don’t get to a place like that without some rough life experience. What matters is what you chose to do with it. Look at Michelle and me. It’s the same thing. We were both dealt a shitty family life, and instead of wanting to be better, Michelle uses it as an excuse. And...I resent her for it. I resent the men she’s with for letting her get away with it, too.”
“But you don’t—”
“Look, you can fight with me about my opinion all you want, but you aren’t going to change my mind. You’re a good guy. If you don’t want to be one, you shouldn’t be here.”
He stared at her. She took years of inadequacy, overcompensating, bad choices, making up for his mistakes and simply...erased them. She balanced the weights with nothing more than a shrug of her shoulder and a flip of her hair.
“Is there a reason you didn’t study to be an attorney? You seem to like winning arguments.”
“I like books more than people, believe it or not. At least, most of the time. I went into anthropology, and then forensics because it was a better career option.”
“What happened? Why are you working as a club promoter?” That was the real question.
“After Mom’s death, I didn’t want to look at dead bodies. I quit my job. Withdrew from the PhD program. I wanted to be around people. Happy. Living. Oddly enough, promoting plays to some of my knowledge. Learning human behavior. What drives them. How to use that.”
“You think you’ll go back? To school, I mean.”
“I think so. This fall. That was the plan, at least.”
“You’ll get there.” He’d see to it. That was the promise he’d made himself when he went down this path. He’d make sure Freya was safe.
Her fingers stroked his chest and her body warmed his.
He’d imagined being in bed with Freya more than a handful of times, but not like this. No one could imagine a scenario like this. He’d like nothing more than to lie here with her, talking, sharing stories, but he had work to do.
“I’m going to check the cameras, then I need to see about some things. You should get some rest.”
“What are you doing?”
Again, how much did he tell her?
“Yuri has a habit of getting away when he shouldn’t. I need to poke around, see if I can’t figure out how he would escape if the cops were to raid this place.”
“There’s a tunnel or something under the club.”
“Really?”
“That’s how he brought me in here. We came up the elevator.” She gestured to the door.
“I want to see it.” Jaxon rolled out of bed, then held out his hand to Freya.
She blinked at him for a moment, then put her hand in his and let him pull her to her feet.
“Cameras, then elevator.” He led the way out of the bedroom, across the main room and out onto the landing. Everything was as it had been when he’d gone into the Queen’s Nest. He didn’t know if that should be comforting or alarming. He tabbed through the cameras, but other than empty chairs and a barren stage, there was nothing.
“What are you going to do once you find the tunnel?” Freya asked.
“Nothing. I’ll let the others know it’s there, and they’ll figure out where it leads.”
“We could follow it ourselves.”
“We could, but I don’t want to be gone too long. Never know when someone might show up.” He was playing with Freya’s life, even now. Every moment they spent together put her more at risk. But he couldn’t stay away. “This way.”
He led Freya to the tiny elevator.
“Do you have shoes?” Jaxon hadn’t even noticed she was barefoot until the lift doors slid shut.
“No, that seems to be the one thing Yuri didn’t provide me.” She wiggled her bare toes against the metal.
Jaxon would need to get her something to put on her feet. If they needed to run, she would do better if she weren’t barefoot.
The elevator descended past the VIP area, first floor and lower, to a level that wasn’t on any blueprint Jaxon had seen. It came to a stop and the doors slid open on darkness so thick it seemed to go on forever.
Jaxon pulled out his phone and shone it into the inky blackness.
“There’s a breeze, so it lets out somewhere. Feel that?” He held out his hand.
“I remember being in a vehicle. They’d given me something, so I was pretty loopy. We turned, drove down into something dark and then stopped.”
Jaxon peered at the edge of the light, where the darkness won, and considered going farther.
There could be cameras, trip wires, any number of things Yuri did to protect himself. He had said the elevator was for his use only.
“Come on, let’s see where the other button takes us.” Jaxon jabbed the remaining mystery button and the doors slid shut.
The elevator didn’t move.
“Dead button?” Freya asked.
“Maybe.” He punched it two more times, but nothing happened.
“Is it a boobytrap?”
“Not funny.” Her question echoed his concern. “Upstairs we go.”
Now he knew how Yuri came and went without anyone knowing. Where he was staying was still a mystery.
Jaxon and Freya returned to the Queen’s Nest. He paused to check the cameras one last time and ensure that no one was the wiser for their little field trip.
He could hear Freya moving inside the suite.
What was he going to do about her? Them?
He dragged a hand across his face.
The right thing to do would be to close the door to the Queen’s Nest and keep his ass behind this desk. He set his finger on the button.
Yeah, that was a joke.
He wasn’t going to lock her in a room, but he also knew that where Freya was concerned, his resolve wasn’t that strong. She wanted to believe he was a good guy. The truth was, he hadn’t always been that person, and deep down, part of him never would be.
9.
Freya stared out at the lights of downtown Seattle. She
almost had them all memorized by now. For however long she lived, this view would be burned into her brain.
Footsteps drew her attention to the reflection of the man over her shoulder.
Jaxon.
Her chest tightened at the thought of his name. When they touched, when they kissed, it all made sense. That simmering desire she’d harbored for him for...months. A year. The two of them, together, was just a matter of time. But something was different now. At least on his side. He could say that he wanted her all he liked, but she didn’t see it reflected in his eyes unless they touched.
She wasn’t asking for love. She didn’t believe in love. But lust? Desire? Those were things she understood. They were natural. Right. And he was resisting the attraction between them for some reason.
He stopped just inside the bedroom door.
What was she going to do with him?
Part of her wanted to strangle him for being so damn stubborn. The other part of her wanted to hold him tight. The rest of her wanted to be completely and totally selfish. So much of what had happened to her these last few weeks had been bad. The stuff of nightmares. Was it wrong she wanted to wrap herself in the little bit of good she saw in him?
Jaxon took a couple of steps further into the room and stopped.
She wanted more from him, but she didn’t want to have to fight for it. Not now.
Freya shoved her feelings down deep and turned around.
At least one of them should get some sleep, and he looked almost dead.
She sidestepped him on her way to the bed but didn’t put enough distance between them. Jaxon caught her around the waist, pulling her toward him. His hand cupped her cheek. She stared up at him, holding her breath for a moment.
All it took was a touch.
His touch, to be exact.
Her body warmed from the inside out. Her nipples tightened. It became harder to breathe. Something like this should be explored.
He didn’t say anything. His brows drew down, and though he didn’t speak, she could almost read his thoughts on his face. He wasn’t immune to the chemistry between them. It affected him, too. She could feel the evidence of it against her hip.
If things had been different, she wondered how that first date might have played out. Her bet was on sweaty sheets and a whole lot of pleasure.
She knew what she wanted. Did he?
“Freya, I still want to explore this.” His gaze dropped to her lips.
“But only on your timetable, right?” She was getting awfully tired of other people setting the rules.
“No.”
She jolted at that word.
Was he serious?
No, now was not the best time to do anything of the sort, but if now was all they had, she didn’t want regrets. She wanted to know what he tasted like, what he felt like. Wouldn’t that be better than dying without having lived? She felt life in his arms.
He dipped his head, his lips brushing across hers. She sucked in a breath and leaned closer. This time he didn’t tease her. He didn’t pull away. He bent, deepening the kiss. His tongue thrust into her mouth and his hands molded her body to his. There was an urgency that hadn’t been there before that echoed what was inside of her.
If they only had now, she wanted him.
She gripped his shoulders and lifted up on tip toe, greedy for more.
Jaxon walked her back a couple of steps until her calves hit the mattress. He gathered her to him and bent her backward, lowering them both to the bed without ever breaking the kiss.
That was talent. She smiled against his mouth, her toes curling with delight.
Freya had suspected that Jaxon would be a different kind of lover.
“Tell me what you want,” he whispered against her mouth.
“You.”
“That’s a dangerous request.” He chuckled, his hand sliding up her side, fingers caressing the curve of her breast.
“I don’t care.” She arched her back, skin tingling. These were the moments she loved, when lust became a drug.
“You should.”
“How’s this?” She slid her hands down to his hips and tugged. He rocked against her, the hard length of his erection impossible to miss.
“Hm.” One corner of his lips hitched up.
God, he was sexy adorable. If that was a thing. When he smiled like that, she knew he was up to something. Jaxon had a mischievous, playful side that life hadn’t killed. She glimpsed it from time to time, but right now, it was all hers.
She lifted her head, aiming for his mouth, but her lips caressed his forehead instead.
He kissed her neck. Her chest. Every place their skin touched tingled. She closed her eyes and surrendered to the heady euphoria of it, of having this man kissing her, making love to her body.
His hands lifted the hem of her tank-top, pushing it and the built-in bra up to her collar bone. He sat up, the cool air skating over her skin. He covered her breasts with his hands, but it didn’t ease the ache.
“Put your hands here. I want to see how you touch yourself.” He grasped her wrists and placed her palms over her breasts.
Whatever she’d said—or done—to change Jaxon’s mind, hopefully she remembered how to do it again. Later. Once wasn’t going to be enough with him. Right now, she was most interested in what he was doing with his shirt.
Button by button he revealed the smooth, chiseled muscle underneath. Dark tattoos swirled over his chest and down his arms. She’d seen them in pictures, but never in person. She’d never found ink interesting before. Most of the guys she knew used it for attention. Jaxon, on the other hand, wore his. He was what captured her interest, not the colors of his skin or the pictures drawn on him.
Jaxon was different. And not just because he didn’t look the same as everyone else, it was an inner strength. Something beautiful. That was why she’d been drawn to him. He wasn’t just a hot guy at the club, he was...more. He’d walked through difficult times, worn the scars like badges of honor, and come out stronger, better for it.
She caressed her nipples, enjoying the way his cheeks sank in, his whole focus on her.
He didn’t get rid of the pants, which was mildly disappointing. They still had a few hours. She wouldn’t mind losing all sense of time and place for a while.
Jaxon bent over her, kissing her stomach, the flare of her hip. His hands stroked her sides and stomach. She loved the feel of his skin against hers. There was no hesitation in the way he touched her.
He hooked his fingers in her shorts and panties. She bit her lip and smiled, the swarm of butterflies in her stomach taking wing.
His breath on her abdomen and then lips on her mound made it hard to breathe. He kissed her everywhere, every bit of skin he exposed. His earlier hesitance hadn’t prepared her for this. She sucked in a breath when he caressed her labia, the touch gentle.
Holy. Shit.
She gasped and lifted her hips off the bed.
Clearly Jaxon didn’t need a road map to where a clitoris was—or what it was good for.
His fingers slid across her damp skin while his tongue and lips became more intimately acquainted with her.
“Oh...” She closed her eyes and cupped her breasts. In her imagination, it was his hands and not hers.
He thrust his fingers into her, stretching her. Freya flattened her hands on the bed, her eyes widening. She groaned and fisted the sheets, losing herself to the feel of a man inside of her. His fingers curled within her. His lips wrapped around the sensitive bundle of nerves, his tongue stroking her.
Freya clawed at his shoulders, but there was nothing to hold onto, except smooth, sleek muscle.
His thumb slid over her clit and something warmer, far more personal thrust into her. His tongue? Whatever it was, she wanted more of it.
“Oh—god.” She gulped down air.
Her spine came up off the mattress and she groaned.
Ripples of pleasure swept through her as Jaxon continued to stroke her body, in no hurry a
t all to be done. Her stomach muscles tightened more, ramping up the intensity of the orgasm. She dug her nails into Jaxon’s shoulders, muttering words that made no sense. She tightened her thighs around him, the euphoria so fierce it flirted with the edge of pain.
Jaxon’s ministrations eased, bringing her down from the high of it all by degrees.
She lay back against the mattress, gasping for air, her body humming. She should be spent, done for, but she wasn’t. No, Freya wanted to do that again. As soon as she caught her breath.
Jaxon planted his hands on the mattress and pushed up to his feet.
She peered up at him through her lashes. Her head was still buzzing, hardly a thought between her ears besides, again? Soon?
Freya might not believe in love, but the beautiful things two bodies did together? That she could appreciate.
Jaxon’s gaze locked with hers. She swallowed and pressed her thighs together. Even in the semi-darkness, she could see the hunger in his eyes. That he, too, wasn’t done yet.
He stood there, one knee between her legs, watching her. What was he waiting for?
Freya pushed up so she sat on the edge of the bed. She leaned forward, kissing his chest and grasped the waistband of his pants.
She palmed his erection with one hand and released the catch on his belt with the other, all while he watched. The man had some crazy self-discipline. She refused to believe that he didn’t feel half of what she did. He had to. It was burning her up from the inside.
Jaxon grasped her by the wrists and gently pushed her hands away. He took a step back, out of her grasp.
She huffed her frustration. Words were still too complicated.
Again, with the no? Was he serious?
She grasped the side of the bed and slid her feet under her.
Freya was going to give him a piece of her mind.
Jaxon’s pants and boxers hit the floor.
She froze.
Oh, sweet mercy...
The man was built like a god. Something to be worshiped.
She watched the bunch and flex of his muscles as he knelt and rummaged in his clothes.
He pulled something out of his pocket. A condom? It crinkled in his grasp. She held her breath, hoping that’s what it was, as he tore it open.
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