by Tabatha Kiss
I slide my arm free. “Maybe.”
“Are you leaving?” she asks, following me across the porch and down the stairs. “I’ll come with you… give you some company.”
“No, thanks, Steph.”
She frowns, letting out a thick, twisted sigh as she slams her heel into the grass. “Goddammit.”
I pause at her sudden outburst. “What?”
Her face tilts with a mean pout. “Junior’s married, Ty’s gay, and you’re…”
“Preoccupied.”
“Whatever the hell that means,” she says. “What’s a girl supposed to do to get a little dick around here?”
I laugh. “You have my sympathies, Stephanie.”
“That doesn’t help me.”
“Actually…” I look her up and down as sobering clarity takes hold of me. “I think we can help each other.”
She squints. “How?”
“Do you know Dr. Payton Zach?”
“The chemistry guy?”
“Yeah,” I nod.
“Oh, I know Dr. Payton Zach…” she smirks. “I know Dr. Payton Zach very well.”
I fucking knew it.
“Really?” I seethe.
“Hey, you aren’t the only one that went for their trifecta this year.”
“Kudos, Ms. Gomez.”
She curtsies. “Thank you.”
“Would you be able to… trifecta Dr. Zach again for me?”
“Maybe.” She raises a brow. “Why?”
“Because he’s a hypocritical jackass and I need to prove it,” I say. “A few incriminating selfies with you should do the trick.”
She tilts her head. “But what do I get out of it?”
I shrug. “His dick, mostly.”
“Ahh…” she nods. “Let me see what I can do.”
“Thank you, Stephanie.”
She pulls her phone out of her pocket and squeezes my shoulder as she passes around me. “Bye bye, John.”
I nod, feeling the edges of epiphany rattle my knees.
Dr. Zach is just the tip of the problem iceberg. I have no doubts that Stephanie will work her magic on that one but now I have the very real issue of getting Rose’s attention again. A banana sure as hell won’t work this time — not that I can get close enough to give one to her anyway.
But if I know Rose Hawthorne like I think I do, then there’s only one place she’ll be tomorrow afternoon.
I have one shot at this. She’ll be watching, along with the rest of the college football lovers of the world.
Might as well show them what I got.
Chapter 24
Rose
Daisy and I arrive at the football stadium for the final game. Honestly, I have a little trouble even being here; torn in two by the love of the game and the hatred of the player but Daisy, of all people, insisted we show up. I guess she’s right. John’s already ruined enough of me already. I can’t let him ruin football, too.
“You know what you need?” she asks as we sit down in the bleachers. “A vacation.”
“Ya think?”
“Seriously, you should come back with me. A little east coast air will do you some good.”
“I have to finish up the semester,” I point out.
“Fine. Winter break, then.”
“Winter on the east coast sucks.”
She exaggerates an exhale. “Okay, fine. Summer.”
I nod. “That might be good.”
“Damn right it’ll be good,” she says, throwing her arm over my shoulder. “Because summer is baseball season.”
“I walked right into that, didn’t I?”
“Ohh, this is gonna be awesome.” I can see the wheels spinning in her head already. “We’ll go to every game, eat our weight in hot dogs, maybe get a second basemen or two in our dugouts…”
“Gross.”
“You’ll love it and it’ll make us even for this.”
I roll my eyes. “It was your idea to come today.”
“A little closure is a good thing, Rose.” She lays a palm on her chest. “I’m just trying to help.”
“I guess.”
“Hey, Rose…”
I look up, hearing my name on a familiar voice, and I instantly regret coming here again.
Dr. Zach stands over me, his eyes shifting between me and my twin as he smiles politely.
“Hey, Dr. Zach,” I say. “You remember my sister, Daisy.”
Daisy keeps her dark eyes on him as if she’s memorizing his features for a collection of voodoo dolls and he gives her an uncomfortable nod.
“Of course.” He clears his throat and looks at me instead. “May I speak to you for a moment?”
I inhale a deep breath. “Okay.”
Daisy pats my knee in support as I stand up and I follow Dr. Zach to the edge of the bleachers.
I fold my arms and stand still, bracing myself for whatever the hell he wants now. “What’s up?” I ask.
“Rose…” he pauses, fidgeting in his shoes. “You are an excellent student.”
I nod. “Okay.”
“One of the best, really,” he continues. “And a terrific TA.”
I stare at him, feeling a little worse than before.
“I guess what I’m trying to say is that I may have been a little too hasty in class the other day,” he says. “Suspending you was the wrong move and I apologize.”
My ears twitch. “Really?”
“I’d like to offer you your TA position back. You can start again on Monday.”
“Seriously?” I ask, a weight lifting off of me. “But… what about John?”
“You know, that’s really none of my business,” he chuckles. “Don’t worry about it.”
“But…” I pause, confused by his quick dismissal of my wrongdoings. “Are you sure? I mean… we disrupted class—”
“People make mistakes.” His voice breaks and he glances at his feet. “Anyway, I’ll see you on Monday.”
“Okay. Thank you, Dr. Zach…”
He spins around and bounces down the bleachers, beelining through the crowd until he finally settles in a seat several sections away.
I return to Daisy, her eyes wide and expectant.
“What did he want?” she asks, ready to pounce.
For the first time in days, I smile. “He offered me my job back.”
“No shit?”
I nod. “He said that people make mistakes and that he may have been too hasty with my suspension.”
“See?” She wraps her arm around me again. “And you didn’t want to come here today…”
I sit in shock and Daisy lists off a few more things we can do over the summer while I watch the field.
Soon, the bleachers are full and the crowd starts pounding their feet, eager and demanding, as they wait for the game to begin.
The team rushes the field and my chest clenches.
Of course, my eyes spot his jersey first. Of course, the fans cry his name. Of course, all I can think about is the way my spine tingles when he kisses me or how he always came up with an excuse to touch me, even when we were just sitting there doing nothing.
John Kirby.
Why haven’t you disappeared yet?
Chapter 25
John
The final game.
This was supposed to be our year. We put in the work. We paid our dues. We lost last time but we fought our way back to the top again. Today, we were meant to take our places amongst college football royalty; fast-tracked right into the pros.
Sorry, guys.
“Hike!”
The center snaps the ball back into Junior’s fingers and he spins around. I make myself available, rushing forward and he slides it into my outstretched fingers.
Then I twist around and slam myself into the first defensive lineman I see.
Ouch.
My team pats me on the back as I stand back up. It was just one mistake; one quick misstep at the start of a stressful game. I take the failure in stride and set myse
lf up for another one.
“Hike!”
I can’t make it too obvious. If I do, they’ll take me out of the game and replace me with a benched player. This won’t work unless Rose can see it.
Junior tosses me the ball again and I take off, traveling less than a yard before I let the cornerback slog me right down to my knees.
Another bad play. Another chance at unattainable redemption.
“Hike!”
Junior’s giving me another shot at this play but I see the hesitation in his eyes as he watches me cradle the ball in my elbow. I fire to the left, playing up the enthusiasm before spinning directly into the outstretched arms of the linebacker. He drags me down to the turf with him and the other team celebrates his wonderful play while I cough the air out of my lungs.
“John!”
Junior calls a time-out and extends his hand to me to pull me off my back. That last hit almost took the wind out of me but I take a few deep breaths to prepare for my next willing tackle.
“John…” Junior steps closer, close enough for our helmets to touch, and I hear him over the crowd completely turning on us. “What’s going on? You okay?”
“I’m fine,” I wheeze.
“No, you’re not. You’re taking this beat down on purpose. What’s going on?” he asks again.
I inhale until I can’t anymore. “We have to lose.”
His eyes grow wide. “We what now?”
“We have to lose.”
“Why?”
I look to the crowd, once again searching for her in a sea of painted and angry faces. “She’s here…” I nod. “I can feel it. She’s out there.”
“Who?”
“Rose.”
“The girl from the wedding?”
“Yes, her.”
“Wait a second… I know what this is!” He points a finger at me. “You’re gesturing right now, aren’t you? This is a love gesture.”
“Rose lost everything because of me and that stupid challenge, man,” I say. “It’s only fair that I lose everything, too.”
“John…” He slaps a hand onto my shoulder pad. “I get it. I do. I don’t like it. But I get it.”
“Thank you.”
“But for the love of god… can you please advance a few yards for me?”
I dig my cleats into the turf. “Nope.”
“John.”
“No! We have to lose.” I stand a little taller. “It’s the only way I can prove that I really love her. She’s my obsession. I have to go out of my way to show her that she’s the only woman in the whole world for me. It’s just like Eliza said.”
Junior blinks. “Eliza made you do this? My Eliza?”
“No, I’m making me do this. It’s for the greater good.”
He sighs. “You realize this is our last shot, right, John?”
I nod. “I do.”
“This is our final game,” he reiterates. “Senior year. Scouts watching. Championship qualifier. The night that makes or breaks our chances at playing pro.”
“I know… but it’s worth it.”
“Holy shit… you really love her.”
“Yeah,” I say. “She’s my Eliza Pierce, Junior.”
“Dammit.” His head drops for a moment. “Okay.”
I tilt my head as he walks away, confused by his reaction as he huddles us up and tells the wide receivers to get ready.
The clock resumes and we take position on the line.
“Hike!”
The center snaps the ball to Junior and he pulls back, readying his arm for a hard throw down the field towards Ty. He launches it but it veers embarrassingly off course and Ty can’t catch up to it before it hits the ground.
The crowd boos and their stomping feet shake the earth beneath us.
Junior turns back to me and nods with understanding.
Chapter 26
Rose
It’s a damn train wreck.
Three minutes into the second quarter and we’re sitting at zero points. I can’t even bring myself to look at the scoreboard to see badly the visiting team is dominating us.
I’m too busy watching John accidentally fumble the ball. Luckily, our tight end falls fast to the ground to take it back before the defense can get their hands on it.
“Man, he’s playing like shit,” Daisy laughs. “At least you know he didn’t rebound with a little natural performance enhancer last night.”
I glare at her.
“What?” she asks. “Does that not help?”
John darts forward on the field, knocking shoulder pads with his own offensive line straight into the other team and I shake my head as the boos around me cry out even louder.
“This isn’t your normal off day playing, Daisy.”
“Then, what is it?”
“He’s doing it on purpose.”
She furrows her brow. “Why?”
“Even Junior is making bad plays…”
“The hunky quarterback?” she asks, her interest piqued.
“Yeah.” I launch onto the tips of my toes to see better. “What the hell is he doing?”
“Uh-oh.”
I look at Daisy. “What?”
She winces. “I kinda might know what he’s doing…”
I stand still, waiting for her say more but she just squeezes her eyes closed. “What is he doing?”
“He’s…” She bites her lip.
“What, Daisy?”
“He’s getting your attention.”
“What?”
“You weren’t returning his calls or texts,” she says, the words tumbling out fast, “so I told him to find some other way of getting your attention. I guess he figured sabotaging the game would be the best way—”
“You told him?” I repeat. “What do you mean you told him? When did you even talk to him?”
“Last night.”
My jaw drops. “When?”
She hesitates. “Like… the second time you were passed out from crying. It’s not important.”
“Why would you talk to him?!”
“Because you were passed out from crying maybe?” she fires back. “Because you’re madly in love with him? Because he’s madly in love with you? Because I got bored waiting on you to wake up again? Take your pick.”
“He is not in love with me,” I argue. “He’s in love with himself.”
“I’m pretty sure he’s both, actually. Also…” She gestures to the field. “I’d like to submit Exhibit A as evidence for his affection towards you. He sure as hell isn’t getting slammed repeatedly for his own funsies. He knows you’ll notice.”
I stare down at the gridiron, letting the argument sink in as the game resumes. The teams take their positions across the forty-yard line. Instead of passing the ball back to John or another running back, Junior launches himself straight into the linebackers in front of him.
The crowd heaves with frustration.
“Is this really my fault?” I ask.
Daisy shrugs. “Probably.”
I wince. “Ah, crap.”
John is sabotaging his chances of winning on purpose and he’s doing it because of me. Because I wouldn’t listen to him. I couldn’t bring myself to give him a second chance because my damn safety bubble felt just a little more secure than his arms.
I stand up from my seat.
“Where are you going?” Daisy asks.
“Uh…” I feel a burst of panic in my chest. “I’m answering the door.”
She squints. “Huh?”
I sidle down the row, constantly knocking knees with others sitting down on my way. They glare hatefully at me and I do my best to mumble off apologies as Daisy shouts after me.
I ignore it. I ignore all of it. It’s what John would do, isn’t it? He’d just keep taking every sack and every tackle that gets shoved at him because getting through to me is more important than winning a damn football game.
“John!”
I jump off the bleachers, nearly slipping to my knees a
s I stumble towards the sidelines.
“John!”
He can’t hear me. I can hardly even hear myself over the hellish screams surrounding the stadium.
I have to get his attention but I’m not crazy enough to rush the field during a damn game.
I take off around the field, keeping on the sidelines all the way to the end zone. Adrenaline rattles my veins, pumping through me faster than I can run but I keep moving past anyone that would try and stop me.
I halt behind the end zone facing the offensive line, my chest heaving as I wave my arms in the air.
“Johnny!”
I jump. I scream. I say his name over and over again until my throat burns.
And then, I hear it. The slow-growing chant behind me.
“Johnny! Johnny! Johnny!”
I turn around and there’s Daisy, riling up the sports fans, coaching them to shout together and they start stomping their feet in unison. The chant spreads, pitching louder until it’s all I can hear over the pounding in my chest.
I spin back and instantly focus on John down the field.
He’s looking right at me.
As the teams get into position along the line of scrimmage, he nudges Junior’s shoulder and points to the end zone.
“Hike!”
Junior hands the ball off to John and he takes off like a damn bullet in my direction.
He slips through the defensive line without even stumbling. They dive at him but John dodges them easily, pumping his feet and arms to take him faster down the field.
He goes all the way, charging right into the end zone in front of me to score a touchdown.
The stadium explodes from all sides but John doesn’t care. He doesn’t stop to dance and show off like he usually does. The ball slips from his fingers and he tears his helmet off his head as he finishes his run towards me.
I throw my arms around his neck and he picks me up as our lips lock. We kiss hard and fast, fighting through the lack of air in our lungs as the ground buzzes beneath us.
“What the hell are you doing?” I ask, tears forming in my eyes.
He lowers me down to my feet. “You were right,” he says. “This isn’t fair. None of this is fair.”
“Is that why you’re losing?”
“If you lose everything, then I lose everything. That’s the way it should be.”