“What does that mean? Did your tests come back?”
Kathryn got to her feet. “Yes, they did, and the results are…not great. I’m not terminally ill or anything, but I need to make some changes. I had hoped that being able to see you would be one of those changes.”
“I lead a pretty busy life. I think…give me some time, okay? A few weeks. I’ll call you.”
Control.
“That would be wonderful. Thank you for seeing me. It means a lot.”
Kathryn stepped forward, and because she had no room to escape, Jordan let herself be embraced. She didn’t hug her back, though, and sensing her reserve, Kathryn took a step backwards.
“I know it’s a lot to think about. Please know that you’ve been on my mind, and the beautiful life your parents were going to give you. Back in those days, we didn’t always think of the police as our friends.”
“I wonder why,” Jordan muttered.
“You saved me. You have become an extraordinary woman. If I had to do it all over again, give you up to make that happen, I’m sorry, I would.”
Abruptly, she turned on her heel and left, before Jordan could react in any way.
What if you had tried harder instead?
She sank onto the armchair, leaning forward. The truth was, Jordan knew all about what it was like to try as hard as you could, and still fail. She had picked up the pieces. That made all the difference in the world. Didn’t it?
Chapter Twenty
Ellie was in her arms a split-second after she opened the door to her. It felt so good that it took Jordan a while to step back and take in her appearance. Her short dress and boots were clearly for a night out. Jordan wasn’t sure she was up to it, but it might be better than trying to analyze Kathryn’s story and what it meant for her, right now. She would have liked to stop thinking altogether for a while.
Something else was new.
“You changed your hair back.”
“Yes, I did. I thought you could use something to cheer you up today…” Ellie nervously tugged on a strand of her newly auburn colored hair. “I hope it’s a good surprise.”
“You’re beautiful. I mean, of course you were beautiful before, but this is actually your natural color.”
A smile lit up Ellie’s face. “You would know.”
“I would. And it’s totally working, thank you. But you didn’t get into this outfit so I could take if off of you right away—or did you?”
“Later,” Ellie said, her cheeks reddening. “For now, there’s somewhere I wanted to go with you…and I thought we could have dinner in town after. Kate is staying at Derek’s for the weekend, so we have the place to ourselves again. If you want to talk…”
“Just let me change and we can leave.”
Kathryn was right about one thing. Jordan had been given the chance to become someone other than a carbon copy of her birthmother, repeating the same mistakes. All the times she’d struggled, with being faithful, with drinking too much, it was behind her now. If she left that in the past, she could do the same with her anger, her accusations, even if they were righteous. She had a different life now, with a woman who loved her, and a job for which she still had the right instincts. Time to move on.
* * * *
Ellie had known it would be a good idea to take Jordan to see Darla. While she hadn’t completely made up her mind about Kathryn, she was, and would always be partial to Jordan.
Darla looked a lot better than the last time she’d seen her. She was allowed to get up and see her son, so Jordan and Ellie joined her.
“Aren’t you proud of me? This was my toughest assignment so far,” she joked.
“How is he? Did you name him yet?”
“He’s gaining weight, so that’s good. I actually did come up with a name. It’s Jordan Avery Pierson.”
“You’re kidding me.”
“I’m not. For all those donuts and specialty coffees you bought me, you deserve it. Now I am kidding. But you know why.”
“I’m honored.” Jordan carefully embraced the younger woman. “You’ll be a great mom.”
Ellie couldn’t help smiling, glad Jordan had found those words. “Anything you need, you know where to find us,” she said. “Let us know when you can go home, one of us can give you a ride.”
“Thank you so much. This little guy will have to stay a little bit longer, but I know he’ll be okay. He’s a fighter.”
“I can see where he got it from,” Jordan said.
* * * *
Ellie had made reservations earlier, just in case, so they could get a quiet table at one of their favorite restaurants in the city.
“I really don’t want to talk about me all the time. Or Kathryn. It is what it is, and she seems to be honest wanting to make amends. I guess I can live with that. What about you?”
“I can live with that too,” Ellie said quickly.
“That’s not what I meant.”
“I didn’t feel like I was going to have a panic attack when we opened up that apartment. So that’s good.”
“It is.”
“Truth be told, I was so busy I didn’t have time to think about it much. I still have…nightmares sometimes.” She stopped while the waiter filled their glasses, and continued when he had left. “I know you do too. It will become less over time. I’m going to live my life. Be with you. Take the detective’s exam eventually. They can’t take that away from us.”
“Sounds good to me.” Jordan raised her glass, and Ellie touched hers against it with a soft clink. “You were always the one with the plan. I admired that from the moment I met you.”
“I’m not sure if my plans were always good.” Ellie laughed softly. “But thank you. I admire you, period. You think you could stand having to work with me every day? If I moved upstairs?”
“Why not? We already work well together.”
“Yeah. Even if Bristol thinks I’m spending a bit too much time with you guys. Don’t worry.” She held up a hand at Jordan’s alarmed expression. “He was nice about it when he told me, but that made me think I need to get back to studying. When it’s time, I want no delays.”
“See. Plans.” Jordan took her hand, holding it in hers gently.
“Speaking of which,” Ellie said, “I know we were kind of laughing when Pauline mentioned it, but I was wondering if you’ve been thinking about kids…lately.”
“Plural? I have thought about it, but my answer is still the same. I want you to be comfortable, take that test, do what you want to do. That’s priority to me, and besides, I still fear I would be a terrible mother.”
“You wouldn’t be, but there’s no rush. I just bring it up so you know you can talk to me about these things…planning the future. Because you’re stuck with me.”
“That’s fine. Because there’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
Ellie couldn’t help smiling at that, thinking how far they’d come. She still had to ask. “How bad was it?”
“Not as bad as I expected. Worse in some respect,” Jordan said honestly. “I’m not twelve anymore, and I realize there’s a limit as to how we can make things better for each other now. Anger takes a lot of energy. My focus is elsewhere now.”
“That’s a good thing.”
As far as Ellie was concerned, it was only the beginning of good things to come. It was true that she usually had a plan. It was coming true, even if they still lived in separate apartments.
* * * *
They spent a quiet weekend at Jordan’s house. Having coffee on the deck, listening to the sounds of birds, Ellie had to admit there was some advantage to this more remote neighborhood. It was just hard to get over the fact, still, that the man who had sold it to her was a convicted serial killer. It was puzzling to Ellie that Jordan could disregard it considering the harm Darby had done her—but it worked for her. The space was beautiful without a doubt, but it was also a half hour drive into the city without traffic, something inconvenient when having to get to work on a Monda
y morning.
At roll call, Ellie was still too content with the course of the weekend and her life in general to react to Chris Atwood whistling as she walked by, whispering something to his buddy. She sat down next to Kate whose eyes widened when she saw Ellie.
“What?”
“He’s a jerk, but I’d whistle too if I could. You look great. So you’re not a natural blonde after all.”
“Great. I’m going to hear variations of this all day, I assume.”
“Prepare for it. Looks great on you.”
Sergeant Bristol walked in, and Ellie could swear there was a flash of surprise on his face when he saw her. She barely suppressed a sigh.
* * * *
No matter how good your life could get, sometimes it just—stank. Jordan tried not to breathe too deeply as she and Derek were standing at the landfill site where workers had reported a body minutes ago.
“What a way to start off the week, huh?”
The woman was face-down, in her twenties maybe, wearing a long dress over a blouse, her hair in a braid that was now disheveled, dirt everywhere. It looked more like a costume than what a women her age might wear on a daily basis, but it was hard to tell. What Jordan found most disturbing was that with the dress riding up, she couldn’t see any underwear.
The scene was already busy, officers taping off the area. The medical examiner’s team had arrived.
Jordan watched as they carefully moved the body around. There was less damage to the woman’s face than she’d feared.
“Oh God,” she heard the soft whisper behind her.
Turning around to find Kate McCarthy’s face an alarming color, she said, “If you’re going to be sick, I understand, but please, go outside the tape, okay?”
Kate shook her head, still ghostly pale. “I’m feeling pretty sick right now, but that’s not it. The woman…it’s Jennifer Beaumont.”
Ellie came up behind her, laying a hand on her shoulder.
“I have to tell her mother,” Kate said, close to tears.
“No, you don’t have to. This is now on a completely different scale. We’ll take care of it.” It was without a doubt the worst part of the job, but Kate had clearly been personally invested. Jordan didn’t think this should be any more traumatic on her than it needed to be.
“You don’t understand. I have to.”
“Kate. Jordan is right.”
Ignoring Derek’s words, and anyone else’s, Kate turned and walked away. Ellie hurried to catch up with her.
Jordan crouched next to the body of the young woman who had been on her way to visit her mother but then disappeared after being seen with the man Rhonda Marks had briefly dated.
They’d had to let him go, but this changed everything.
Raphael Deane would have to answer many more questions.
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The Interpretation of Love and the Truth
The Design of Everything Perfect
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Utopian/Dystopian
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Read a chapter of the next Carpenter/Harding novel, Initiations:
Initiations
Chapter One
There was no sign of Jordan or Kate when Ellie entered the Night Shift. In fact, there was nobody familiar, so she decided to take a seat at the bar and have a glass of wine while waiting for them. She was worried about her friend who had become quiet and withdrawn ever since a missing persons case she had worked on turned into a homicide investigation.
This case was the reason why Jordan was late, too. Lately, Kate had expressed little interest in going out with friends after work. Since she stayed at Derek Henderson’s most of the time, Ellie hardly saw her anymore outside of the precinct, even though they shared an apartment.
She handed a bill to the bartender who placed the glass of chilled wine in front of her.
“Hey. I almost didn’t recognize you. Nice color.”
The woman taking a seat on the stool next to hers looked different from the way Ellie remembered her, too, her blonde hair cut to chin length, her clothes more casual than she had ever seen her in.
“You’re back.”
“I see you found a new place,” Dr. Bethany Roberts said. “Not quite the same. The Code 7 was legendary, even though it was kind of…rustic.”
“I’m surprised to see you here.”
“Why, because I’m not one of the down-to-earth cops you usually hang with?” Bethany asked, amused. She ordered a whiskey on the rocks. “It’s about work, but you already guessed that. At least I hope you did. How are you doing?”
Ellie shrugged, still somewhat perplexed about Bethany making small talk.
“I’m good. We’ve been good,” she added with a hint of an edge. Defensive. That wasn’t likely to go away around Bethany.
“That’s great to hear.”
“What’s going on?” After half the glass, Ellie found she was brave enough to ask the question.
Bethany gave her a wry smile. “Honestly, I’m not sure, but I know this. You’ve seen me at my worst, and you’re still polite. It’s only fair to return the favor, don’t you think?”
“I guess.”
“Besides, I’m grateful. I was clinging to something that clearly wasn’t worth holding on to. That’s over. It’s better for all of us.”
Ellie took another sip, uncomfortable with where this conversation was going. She never knew how to pick the right tone with Bethany, or what she expected her to say at this moment. Don’t worry, you’ll find someone? Maybe she could come up with something less condescending.
“Is this about Deane? I hear the A.D.A. is going to charge him.”
“Esposito, yes. I’m sure he’s guilty of something, but with him, we’re only scratching the surface. I shouldn’t be telling you this, though I’m sure you are up to date on the case. How are you getting along with her?”
“The A.D.A? I don’t have much to do with her. I know she worked here before, but that’s all.”
It was Bethany’s turn to look surprised. “Jordan didn’t tell you?”
“Tell me what?”
“Oh, nothing. I thought you knew. It’s really not that important—forget I said anything.”
“What did you mean? I’m asking you politely.”
“You know you weren’t the only one, right? The difference is, you won. After her, I was still fooling myself into thinking that there was something we could fix. Never mind, with the way Jordan left her, there’s not much of a chance Valerie came back for her. And that’s all you’re getting from me on that subject. It’s not one I’m happy to revisit.”
You brought it up, Ellie wanted to say, unsure how to feel about the news. Jordan hadn’t mentioned her previous involvement with the A.D.A. She’d had more than enough opportunities.
“Then let’s not. What did you mean that we’re only scratching the surface with Deane?”
“Really? I’m supposed to save the fun stuff for the meeting tomorrow. Maybe Bristol lets you come. You’re still going to take the detective’s exam?”
“I haven’t changed any plans,” Ellie said. She hoped Jordan hadn’t either. “I’ll ask him.”
/>
“Yes, you do that. Oh, and here’s the gang. Like old times.”
Jordan walked in with a group of other detectives from the precinct, Derek Henderson, Maria Doss and Cliff Waters. Ellie was relieved to see Kate with Derek. She slipped off the barstool and went to greet Jordan with a kiss, the second glass of wine sparking more public display of affection than usual.
“Hello to you too,” Jordan said with a surprised laugh. “You really missed me.”
They found themselves a table at the far end of the bar. Ellie would have liked to confront her sins of omission right now, but to her dismay, Valerie Esposito entered the bar. She was heading for their table, but realizing Bethany had joined them, she turned and stayed at the counter.
“I so did,” Ellie admitted as she sat down next to Jordan, ignoring Bethany studying their exchange with an amused expression.
“I assume neither of you missed me much, but here it goes. Tomorrow, 7:00 a.m. in the conference room. I guess your boss told you that we’ll take Deane into Federal custody.”
“What?” Jordan said, obviously not happy with this turn of events.
“I know, you never were a morning person, sorry about that. We’ll have to wrap this up quickly.”
“I wasn’t talking about the time. This is a murder investigation. There’s no reason for you to be on it.”
“Oh, wait for it, there is,” Bethany insisted. “I’ll have to wait until tomorrow, though, because then Valerie has no choice whether or not to join us. We’ll all do our jobs. You’ll see it will be just fine.”
“Whatever,” Jordan dismissed her. “Is anybody going to get drinks?”
“I’ll go,” Derek offered. “Kate?”
“I’ll have a beer.”
“I’ll have another glass of wine,” Ellie said simultaneously.
Bethany swirled the rest of her whiskey in the glass where the ice cubes had almost melted down. Derek hadn’t waited for her. “A warm welcome as usual. How could I ever stay away?”
Intrusions Page 17