by Izzy Shows
Of course, it’s not human. You’re in hell. Nothing here is human. Idiot.
I winced at the sharp tone of the voice in my head, but it had a point. I didn’t know what I’d been thinking.
The creature—because it could only be a creature—had a giant body and three heads, its body covered in red scales. It looked about damn ready to eat us.
I forced one foot up, so I was half-kneeling, then braced one hand on the knee to push myself up.
And fell.
Okay, so I wasn’t standing up then. I cursed and clenched my jaw. We were here staring down a very nasty monster, and I was weak as tits.
Weaker. I couldn’t even stand up.
I fucking knew this would happen. I knew the Sacrifice of Blood was going to fuck me. This is why I wanted to piggyback on that arsehole’s death.
Emily’s sword rang out as she drew it. I couldn’t leave her to fight this creature on her own. I reached for my magic, but couldn’t grasp it. It wasn’t that it eluded me; I just couldn’t hold onto it. It was like trying to grab hold of water; only it wasn’t water. The problem was I was too gods damned weak to keep it.
“Fuck.” I tried to force myself into action, but it did no good.
I was powerless, and I hated being so. My entire life before I’d met Aidan had been one situation after another where I’d been too weak to do anything—too small to stop my foster parents from beating me, too distracted to pay attention in school, too broke to pay my rent.
With Aidan, I’d found my power. The magic inside of me allowed me to be something different, something more, and I…I didn’t know what to do without it.
It’s not gone. You just can’t use it right now.
“Demon, I offer you a chance at redemption,” Emily called. She had one hand outstretched. “Step aside now, and your existence can be changed forevermore. You need not cause such senseless destruction. You can journey outside this realm and find a life of peace.”
There she went again offering redemption to anyone, and everyone, she came across. It would be funny if it weren't so dangerous. The demon wasn’t going to accept her offer, but she had to make it. It was who she was.
And damn it, while I was mad at her for doing it last night, it was one of the reasons I loved her. She didn’t give up on anyone, no matter what. She didn’t give up on me.
“Emily…” I panted, forcing myself to at least kneel. “I can’t…”
She turned her gaze to me, her eyes shining with a powerful light. “Rest, Blair. This will be over in a moment.”
I swallowed. Emily wasn’t entirely Emily anymore. Imbued with a holy power I could never really understand. She was capable of so much more than anyone else could ever hope to be. She was the embodiment of all that was good in the world, and she was going to do what she’d been made to do: fight evil.
The demon roared, pawing the ground like an animal.
“You foolish mortal. You should not have come here. Your mercy will die with you.”
Emily lifted her chin, but she didn’t repeat herself. She’d given the creature a chance, and he’d failed to take it. He’d signed his own death warrant.
Soundless, she raised her sword with both hands and charged the creature four times her size, as if it was nothing for her to worry about. My breath caught in my throat and terror seized my body.
Emily!
Oh gods, what if she failed? What if she died? I couldn’t bear to watch, and yet I couldn’t tear my eyes from the scene playing out. I cursed myself again for being too weak to help.
She needed me, and I couldn’t even stand up to shield her with my body.
But Emily didn’t seem to have given a second thought about fighting on her own. She was faster than she looked—faster than she had any right to be with that armor on. She darted in and out to slice at the demon’s legs.
In for a cut, then out to evade his hands. Hands that could crush her in an instant.
My heart was in my throat as I watched with a mingled sense of horror and amazement her attacks against the creature.
Please be all right. Please let this be over quickly.
The creature grabbed her with one giant fist and lifted her into the air. Her sword fell, useless, to the ground.
“Emily!” I screamed, fighting, and failing, to get to my feet.
No, no, no. It couldn’t end like this. She couldn’t die in front of me while I stood helpless to defend her. I should never have brought her here, never should have endangered her like this. Oh, gods, it was all my fault.
The creature swung her from side to side, letting out an ugly sound that might have been laughter.
“Emily, no!” Tears burned my eyes as they slid down my cheeks. I tried, again and again, to get up, but my body ignored my commands.
Nothing I can do…no, please, no…
I brokenly sobbed as I watched and bitterly wished there was something I could do. Anything.
She stretched her hands in front of her. A blinding white light shot out and seared into the chest of the demon. The demon screamed, falling to its knees. Its hand opened, and she fell from it.
She landed in a crouch, never dropping her hands, keeping up the constant burn of white light.
The demon screamed, clawing at its chest until it slumped over. Its head hit the ground with a sickening thud.
Quiet.
The light faded, and Emily staggered to the side.
Oh gods, was she okay?
“Emily,” I whispered.
She slumped to the ground.
Chapter 10
“Emily!” I clawed the ground, dragging myself an inch at a time over the blackened earth. My legs wouldn’t hold me up, but at least my arms worked somewhat.
An eternity passed before I reached her still form. She laid on her side. With a weak shove, I rolled her onto her back.
“Emily, please.” I stroked her hair out of her face. “Wake up. I can’t lose you. Please, don’t leave me.”
“Blair…” Her hand caressed my hair. “You’re crying.”
“Of course, I’m crying, you dummy! You almost died.”
She struggled to a sitting position and cupped my face. “I would never leave you without protection, no matter what happens.”
“I wouldn’t have cared if that demon had eaten me whole. I care about you.”
She hugged me fiercely. “Don’t say such things about yourself.”
“It’s true. I care a helluva lot more about your life than mine.” I let her hold me, drinking in the feel of her arms around me.
“Are you all right? You scared me when you couldn’t stand up.”
“You scared me when that monster picked you up.”
She made an exasperated sound. “Be serious. I asked you a question.”
“I’m fine. Maybe. I don’t know. I still can’t stand.”
“Can you feel your legs? Did something happen when we came through the gate?”
“Other than mind shattering pain?” I shrugged, then winced. “No, nothing special happened. I’m just so damn weak from the Sacrifice of Blood.”
She closed her eyes, breathing in sharply. “I’m sorry. This is my fault.”
“It’s fine. We had to come, doesn’t really matter in the long run which way. And we got through it in one piece, didn’t we?”
She chuckled. “Yes, I suppose. We’re alive. That’s all that matters.”
“Exactly, and we’re going to stay that way. Which reminds me, we need to move. This isn’t a good spot to camp.”
She raised one eyebrow. “But you can’t stand.”
I grinned. “I’m willing to bet I can shuffle along if you let me hang onto you. I’m a fighter. We’ll figure something out.”
“Well…all right. This probably isn’t a good place to stay for the moment.”
I shifted away from her so she could stand up. She retrieved her sword, sheathing it on her back. Then she pulled me to my feet and wrapped one of my arms around her nec
k, holding tight to my hand with her own.
I smiled. She wouldn’t let me fall. No matter what, I was always safe with Emily.
“One sec, I need to get the map out,” I said. “Need to make sure we’re going in the right direction.”
“Where are we going?”
“Dersius, one of the seven realms down here. One of the seven fallen brothers rules one. That’s all the demon told me. But the locating spell pointed to Dersius.” I groped awkwardly for my bag, still slung over my body so that it rested against my hip. It took me a minute, but I got the map out and shook it a few times to make it stay open. “All right, so it looks like we need to head that way. Dersius is at the very center, so at least we don’t have to cross the whole of hell to get there.”
“That’s good, but we still have to go through all seven realms.”
“Yep. It’s set up like a ring, for some reason. Dersius is the center ring, around the lake of fire. Don’t ask me who designed this. It doesn’t seem very intelligent to me. But as long as we keep going in a more or less straight line, we should be all right.”
She nodded. I put the map back in my bag.
We shuffled off in the right direction.
My damaged body was holding us back, but I couldn’t do anything about it, even if I couldn’t stop stressing about it.
Hell was huge. While I didn’t have a frame of reference for the map, there had been something like a legend on it. I estimated it would take about a day to get to the first realm.
It was looking to be a long journey. What if it would be too late by the time we reached Malphas? What if the angel got bored of toying with him and killed him?
What if he was dead already?
No, I can’t think like that. Malphas is going to live.
It was the only acceptable option.
Chapter 11
I was wrong.
It only took us half a day to get to the first border, which was good. But the distance we’d crossed to get to here was about the same distance between the first realm and the second, as well as between the second and the third, which meant it would take another full day to get to the third realm. And to make matters worse, the distance between them only grew with each ring you passed through.
It was going to take more than three days to get to Desirius.
I was not going to panic about this. Old Blair would waste all her time freaking out and overthinking things, but I was New Blair now. New Blair didn’t fuck around.
The border was just a wall of energy. It was nearly invisible, so if you didn’t know what you were looking for, you would have missed it.
“Here goes nothing.” I took a step toward the border.
Emily put her hand on my arm. “This is going to be the first trial, right?”
“Yeah. We are going to have to go through the Trials of the Seven Realms, so most likely we’ll encounter the trial when we cross.”
She frowned.
“Do you have any idea what the trial might be? Anything to prepare for?”
I sighed. “No clue. All I know is we have to go through and deal with whatever comes.”
She grimaced.
“What’s wrong?” I asked.
“I just worry we may be facing another fight, and you aren’t fully recovered. I have no problem fighting on my own. It’s not that. I only worry something might happen to you.”
My body was mostly recovered, just still a little weak from the blood loss, but I could walk. Fighting would be more difficult, but not impossible.
I shrugged. “I’m well enough to defend myself, and you, if necessary. Maybe not punching a heart out ready, but I will manage.”
She giggled when I gave her a lopsided grin.
I offered her my arm. “Together?”
She nodded and looped her arm through mine. We walked across the barrier.
The effect was instantaneous. One moment we strode across the blackened earth, the next we were somewhere else. Not on the other side of the border.
We stood in a white void. There was nothing visible, but we were definitely standing on something.
“Welcome, mortals,” a disembodied voice boomed. The voice was different than the creature we’d faced before, not as painful and not demonic in the slightest. If I had to guess, whatever spoke to us was some sort of automatic system and not a sentient creature at all. “You have come to enter Vashtix, the Realm of Pride. You will be tried before allowed to pass.”
“Bring it on.” I defiantly looked around for the source of the voice but found nothing.
“Be at ease, mortal. Your trial is not one of combat. Your soul will be stripped bare and your pride taken from you. You will relive that which is most unbearable for you.”
I froze, and my eyes flicked to meet Emily’s. Was she going to see what I experienced? Oh, gods, I didn’t want her to—
I snuggled deeper under my covers and pulled them up to my chin as I clenched my eyes tight and willed myself to sleep. But it was not forthcoming, and it wouldn’t be anytime soon. I hadn’t been able to rest well for the past week, but still, I hoped the uneasiness would pass, and I’d find peace.
The floorboards outside my room creaked. I tensed. I tried to soothe the tension out of my body but failed. Something bad was coming. I knew it in my bones.
The door eased opened. The pale light from the hall spilled onto the floor. I clenched my eyes closed, pretending to be asleep. Maybe if she thought I was sleeping nothing bad would happen.
Nothing bad is going to happen. She’s just checking on you.
“You’re supposed to be asleep.” Her voice was flat, but it still sent chills down my spine.
“I’m trying,” I said in a small voice, then immediately regretted it. I shouldn’t have acknowledged I was awake, should have pretended to sleep.
“You’ve been in bed for an hour, and you’re still awake.” She marched into the room and yanked the covers off me. “Why can’t you follow simple rules? It’s bedtime. Go to sleep.”
“I’m trying, I promise. I stayed in my bed and counted sheep. I’m trying to follow the rules like a good girl.”
“You’re not a good girl! You break everything.”
I remembered the way she’d looked this morning when her cell phone died. I had tried to explain it hadn’t been my fault. I’d touched it, that’s all, but it had fizzled out a mostly quiet death as soon as my fingers had grazed it. She’d looked at me like I’d done it on purpose like I was trying to destroy things.
It wasn’t the first time something had gone wrong here. The lights kept burning out, and the television got all static-y whenever I got too close.
I wasn’t trying to ruin things, and I didn’t see how these things could be my fault, but she’d used her angry voice when it happened.
Tears welled in my eyes.
Can’t cry. If I cry, she’ll send me back, I just know it.
“I didn’t break anything.”
She smacked me so hard I saw stars. My head jerked back at the impact. I whimpered, afraid to make too much sound and antagonize her further.
Why had she hit me? What did I do wrong?
It was all my fault. If only I’d fallen asleep, she wouldn’t be mad.
“I’m trying…” I whispered, hoping to appease her.
She smacked me again, her breathing coming hard now. She grabbed me by the hair and jerked my head back, forcing me to look at her.
She sneered. “You’re ruining everything.”
“What did I do?” My voice broke at the beginning of a sob.
“Shut up!” Her hand curled into a fist and slammed into my abdomen, driving all the air from my lungs. She let go of my hair, and her fists hammered into me one after the other.
She didn’t hit my head or my arms or anywhere that would leave a visible mark, but everywhere else was fair game. I’d later learn she kept the marks hidden on purpose, keeping the marks hidden so that no one would know. But at the time I didn’t understand—
didn’t understand any of it.
The beating continued for ages. She stepped back, breathing hard. I didn’t dare look at her. I just curled into a ball and did my best to hold back any sounds of pain. Tears burned in my eyes. If I made a noise, it might set her off again.
Without a word, she stormed out of the room and slammed the door.
I let myself cry, but only silently. I tried to be as quiet as possible.
I didn’t know why she had hit me. All I knew was I hurt so much. Not just my body, but also my fragile little heart that had just wanted to be loved.
No one can love me. I’m awful. I must be really horrible for her to do that. It’s all my fault. I should have been better. I don’t deserve to be loved.
It was the first time the self-loathing thoughts echoed in my head, but far from the last.
The pain, and shame, of the memory consumed me. It hadn’t just been a memory. I’d been that little girl all over again. I remembered so clearly how much I had hoped she would love me, and how broken I’d felt when I realized it would never happen. I couldn’t look at Emily. I didn’t want to see the pity in her eyes, or the revulsion I feared would be there. Had she seen it? Maybe she hadn’t—
I was somewhere else. It had happened so fast I didn’t have time to wallow in my misery anymore.
It took a moment, and then I realized what I was seeing.
Emily put on her armor in her room, preparing for a mission. A ghost of a smile curved my lips. She was resplendent in her armor.
But this was her memory—her worst memory. What could go wrong? Everything looked so picture perfect.
She walked out of the room as soon as she finished, her face set in pure determination. I shivered. I wouldn’t want to be whoever she was going up against. She was a terrifying warrior. She passed through me as if I were a ghost. My body was pulled along behind her like a string connected us.
I was powerless to be anything but a casual observer.
A van waited for her outside. She climbed in the back, and I was pulled in behind her. Three men sat in the back with her dressed as she was. For a little while, none of them spoke.