by Dark Angel
"You drive me so fucking insane," I hear Connor say as he rests his hands over my ass cheeks, spreading them wide as his cum drips down my ass crack. Then he leans into me, and I tremble as I feel the tip of his tongue moving up the length of my ass. He stops right on my asshole, and then he moves his mouth down in a hurry, crushing his lips against my hole. Jabbing his tongue against my ass, he scoops up his own cum, licking and sucking with a wicked hunger.
"Oh, God, yes," I moan, smiling to myself as I feel the wet touch of his mouth. I even jut my ass back, pressing it against his face, and I stay like that until he finally pulls back from me.
Sitting up in a hurry, I then turn to him and lace one arm around his neck. I pull him into me fast and he doesn’t react; he just parts his lips as I crush my mouth against his, shoving my tongue past his lips. I kiss him eagerly, savoring that sweet blend of flavors in his mouth. The muskiness of my pussy, the saltiness of his seed… God, I used to think of myself as an experienced woman, but only after Connor and I started going at it did I really push past my limits. I mean, I've never done something as crazy as kiss a man with his own cum, not to mention that this was the first time I allowed someone inside my backdoor… Yeah, that’s right, in a sense, Connor stripped me of my virginity.
"I gotta start confessing more regularly," I whisper with a light chuckle, running my tongue over my lips and licking them dry. Looking into him, I see his chin glistening, a thick strand of cum hanging from his lower lip, and I don’t even think twice. Leaning into him, I reach for that strand with the tip of my tongue and scoop it into my mouth. Swallowing as I smile at him, I then throw myself back against one of the walls, closing my eyes as I savor all that pleasure still running inside my veins.
"It’s liberating, isn’t it?" he asks me, sitting by my side.
"What is?"
"To confess your sins…" he smiles, and then he can’t resist adding a few words more. "And to make some more."
Clarise
Squeezing myself inside my clothes again, I run one hand through my hair and sit in one of the pews. I lean back against it and sigh heavily, my heart still hammering against my chest.
I close my eyes for a second, and then I remember the reason I came after Connor in the first place. Earl, remember? I know, I know… I was in such a hurry to talk with Connor about my impromptu meeting with Earl, but what can I say? I simply couldn’t resist teasing him the moment I saw him kneeling inside the confessionary.
"Come here, we need to talk about something…" I say, patting the spot next to me. He smiles softly as he buttons up his shirt, and then he sits down on the pew by my side.
"What is it, Clarise? I hope you don’t have anything else to confess," he chuckles, and I can’t help but chuckle as well; there’s no regret in his voice this time, and that kinda makes me feel better. As fun as it is to make him cross a line, I sure as hell don’t like making him miserable because of it.
"No, nothing to confess," I start. "But Earl’s up to something… He met me in the library and there was something about the way he talked. I don’t know what it is, Connor, but he’s up to something. And it isn’t good," I tell him, now capable of talking business. It’s as if I needed to have his body first before I could articulate a sentence that would make any sense.
"I know he is," he tells me flatly, his gaze wandering out to the altar. He remains deep in thought for a long while, and I have to be the one to cut through the silence.
"I’m worried … I don’t know what Earl might do if he gets control of the company. He doesn’t really care about the family. All he cares about is power and control … and once he has that…"
"I know, Clarise…" he whispers, and then he places his hand on top of mine, gently squeezing it. "But I don’t want you to worry. I’ll keep Jonathan on the right path, and I won’t let Earl wrestle the company away from him … or from the family."
"Please, don’t underestimate him … I mean it. He’s dangerous, and if he sees you as an obstacle, he knows no limitations."
"I know, I won’t underestimate him. I’ll keep my eyes open," he tells me softly, and something in his tone of voice eases my mind.
"Thank you," I whisper back at him and, before I think of what I’m doing, I open my arms and wrap them around his body, pulling him into me and hugging him tightly. Somehow, his closeness makes me feel safer than I’ve ever felt.
"You don’t have to thank me," he breathes out, running one hand through my hair as he holds me close. "There’s nothing that I want more than to protect you…"
I look into his eyes, stunned at his words. For a man who was so adamant about running away from me, this is quite a change.
"I know what you’re thinking," he says, offering me one weak smile. "But I guess I wasn’t really running away from you … I was running away from the truth."
"What truth…?"
"I want you, Clarise. Ever since I returned to the States, you’ve been the only thing brightening up my day. I didn’t mean to break my vows, but… sometimes a man has to follow his heart. That’s the truth."
"I’m glad you’re here," I tell him softly, not knowing what else to say. I still have my arms wrapped around him, and I close my eyes and lay my head against his chest. I stay there, in his embrace, for God knows how long. I feel his heartbeat, soft and steady, and I realize that all the lust and desire I feel toward Connor is growing into something else. Something powerful… Something over which I’ll have no control soon enough.
And you know what? It feels right.
"I should go…" I force myself to say, my heart weighed down by sorrow. "My parents will be home soon, and I guess it’s better I’m inside the house when they arrive…"
"I’ll walk you there," he tells me in a single breath, standing up and pulling me after him. We walk down the aisle in silence and, only when he reaches for the door and opens it, do I realize I'm holding hands with him. My transformation into sappy teenager is almost complete, I guess.
He only lets go of my hand when we step out of the chapel and, even though we walk up the road in silence, I feel closer to him than ever. More than just the sex, something happened inside the chapel… I broke through his defenses and I think that, somehow, I’ve showed him that he doesn’t need to be as stern and disciplined as his father to make him proud.
As good to me as Edward was, he was a true stoic. He seemed unphased by most things in life, and he followed what looked like a Spartan regimen. I don’t think that Connor knows it but, after the first few months with us, Edward changed his quarters without telling anyone; instead of sleeping in the guest house, he started sleeping in the smallest and coldest room we had available in the servants’ quarters.
Of course, I can’t say for sure what was going on inside Edward’s mind. In a way, though, I believe that it had to do with the death of his wife. The moment she passed away, something broke inside of him, and he denied himself the happiness he deserved.
I don’t want Connor to follow down that road.
"Well, we’re here," he says, and I realize that we’re already in front of the stairway leading up to the mansion.
"We’re here," I smile, and then look from side to side. Certain that there’s no one around, I go on tip-toes and brush my lips against his.
He kisses me back and, for a moment, the world is perfect.
Connor
Change.
I guess that’s what Clarise taught me—sometimes change isn’t bad. Sometimes, change is exactly what you need.
I guess I thought that, by changing, I was disrespecting everything that I treasure. God, my honor, my father… But now, I think that I see it differently. Change is necessary if I’m to learn and grow. What good am I if I remain stagnant for the rest of my life?
Besides, my relationship with Clarise has nothing to do with the way I can help the Donovans. Sure, it might cause some trouble down the road, but that has nothing to do with my capabilities or impartiality right now.
Pu
sh comes to shove, I’ll resign. I won’t let my relationship with Clarise hurt the Donovan family, but I sure as hell won’t put a business family above the woman I --
Jesus, I was about to say it, wasn’t I? I was about to tell you that I love her. What’s happening to me? Okay, I need to focus; I can’t be thinking of this right now. I’ve got a meeting to prepare for, and contemplating the meaning of love and life isn’t going to help me with that.
Sitting down at the desk in my bedroom, I crack open the folder sitting in front of me and start reading through the documents. I’m about to start writing down some notes when I hear a knock at my door.
My heart jumps up happily as I think it might be Clarise, and I stand up in a hurry. I walk to the door with wide strides and, without thinking twice about it, I just open it and smile.
It isn’t Clarise on the other side.
"You should've been more careful, Connor," Earl says, walking past me and inside the guest house. There’s a contemptuous expression on his face, one that means trouble.
"What are you talking about?" I ask him, already feeling a knot forming deep in the pit of my stomach.
"Well, you know … the church has a damn good security system. And, unfortunately for you, the pastor over there owed me a favor."
"What are you getting at, Earl? Spit it out," I tell him, balling my hands into fists. Even though I asked him what he’s talking about, I know exactly what he means with his words: he has proof of my involvement with Clarise. It has to be it.
"Oh, I can see it in your eyes… You know what I’m talking about, don’t you? You and my little sister, going at it… Let me tell you, you two sure went really hard at it. I’m surprised that a man of God would have so much stamina."
"You fucking --"
"Oh, aside from fucking my little sister, now you’re also cursing? You’re a basket full of surprises," he laughs, the sound of his voice feeling like nails being dragged across chalkboard. "Well, I’ve got the footage," he continues, taking an USB pen out from his breast pocket. I take one step toward him, ready to crush my fist against his head, but he just throws the pen toward me. Moving fast, I raise my hand and grab it mid-air. "You can keep that one… I have copies."
"You’re a shame to your family, Earl…"
"Well, I wasn’t the one fucking Clarise inside a church. I’d say that’s shameful," he laughs, his eyes immediately going toward the orchid that Clarise gifted me on my first day at the estate. "Nice flower, did my sister gave it to you?"
"What do you want, Earl?" I ask him, but then I can’t resist adding a few more words. "Start talking, and start doing it fast."
"What do I want? Now you’re asking the right kind of questions, Connor…" he continues, the tone in his voice pissing me off more and more with each passing second. Swear to God, I’m seconds away from grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and throwing him out the window. "Well, it’s pretty simple; you either start playing ball or else I’m going to expose your dirty little secret."
"What do you want?" I ask him, my patience already growing low.
"So impatient, man," he laughs, reaching inside his jacket at the same time. "If you were more patient with my sister, maybe you wouldn’t be in this situation," he continues, taking an envelope out of the inner pocket of his jacket. He pushes it into my hands and I just stare at him for a second.
"What’s this?"
"That’s a bit of information on your assignment."
"My assignment?" I ask him, arching one eyebrow in disbelief.
"Yeah, Connor, your assignment. Now you work for me. You’re my little bitch," he whispers, his words brimming with threats. "What I want you to do is to get my father to invest in that company." He nods at the envelope in my hands, and I start opening it.
"Red Lion Aviation? What the hell’s this?" I ask him, reading the red lettering on top of the document. It seems to be a small summary of the operations of a mid-sized airline based out of Indonesia.
"Can’t you read? It’s an airline. And I want you to get my father to invest in it, $2 billion." His grin widens into something sickly as he tells me the value he intends to invest, and I look at him with disbelief.
"$2 billion? Are you out of your mind? That’s a lot of risk for a piece-of-shit company like this," I growl, throwing the envelope and the document into his face. They hit him in the chest and then float down to his feet.
"I don’t care what you think, asshole," he growls back at me, closing the distance between us and pressing his index finger against my chest. "You’ll do what I say, or else I’ll ruin you… and Clarise." With that, he narrows his eyes and takes one step back. Giving me one final grin, he finally marches out of my house, slamming the door behind him.
Fuck.
Clarise
I don’t understand.
After everything that happened between the two of us, after the words we exchanged the last time we were together, Connor simply vanished. He doesn’t return my calls, and he’s nowhere to be found. It’s been one day after our little confession, and I haven’t seen him since.
Oh, God, what if Earl has done something stupid…? Something I even don’t dare think about?
I’ve been to his house and to the chapel, but he wasn’t there. Then, I enlisted one of our private drivers and he took me to the mega-church; he wasn’t there either. Nor was he in the Donovan Tower.
So where the hell can he be?
Right now, sitting in the back of the limo, I can’t help but feel that something nefarious has just happened. Connor wouldn’t disappear like that, especially when he knows that my father might need him. But what if…? What if Connor ran away from me? Maybe he simply couldn’t endure the pressure of being with me and serving as my father’s adviser. But no, that doesn’t make any sense. Connor isn’t the kind of man to pack up and leave.
Maybe I’m acting crazy. I mean, it’s only been a day … maybe he’s busy with something else? But with what?
Then, it dawns on me.
"Take me to the cemetery," I tell my driver through the intercom, certain that Connor has to be there. Where else would a man like him turn in a moment of turmoil? If he isn’t in the church or in the chapel, he must've gone to the cemetery.
I spend the next fifteen minutes in a kind of desperate anxiety and, by the time the limo stops in front of the cemetery, I almost jump out of the car while it’s still moving.
"I’m okay," I wave at the driver and, without bothering to look back, I start hurrying down one of the small cemetery paths, the one that’s going to take me to the place where Edward was buried.
And there he is.
The sun is setting, and the shadows are already growing long. There’s a certain solemnity to his silhouette in the distance, standing in front of his father’s grave; for a moment, I almost consider turning around and leaving him alone.
But my feet carry me toward him, and neither my mind nor my soul raise their voices in protest. He looks back over his shoulder as he hears my soft footsteps over the grass, and he offers me a sad smile. Something’s wrong. Something’s very, very wrong.
"What’s wrong?" I ask him, my mouth suddenly feeling dry.
"Isn’t it obvious, Clarise?" he asks me, that sad smile never leaving his lips. Now facing his father’s grave, he continues to speak as I stand by his side. "What are we even doing?"
"Does it matter? Do we really have to think so hard about it?"
"In a perfect world, there’d be nothing to think about… Because I love you, Clarise, I really do," he says, and it feels as if I’ve been hit in the head with a brick. He loves me? "But this isn’t a perfect world, is it? And there are larger things in play here."
"Is this about your vows?"
"It’s about everything," he shrugs. "I’ve already broken my vows, I’m risking my job and --"
"Your vows don’t matter, Connor. You don’t need to prove anything to anyone. And what good will come from forbidding yourself from love? As for the job, no
body will ever find out…"
"You know that’s not the truth… What’s done in the darkness, will destroy us in the light."
"Stop that!" I demand, trying to reach for him, but he just takes one step back and pushes me away. "I don’t understand, Connor! Everything was … everything was good. I don’t understand why you have to be talking like this now!"
"Just think of it. Really think about it, Clarise. I know you want to prove to your father that you can run the company as well as he does; do you think he’ll still give you that chance after he finds out about the two of us?"
"What does that got to do with anything? We’re not talking about the company! We’re talking about you and I," I protest, feeling a blend of sadness and anger welling up inside of me. I simply can’t understand why he’s quitting on us right now. And, God, it feels horrible. It feels as if the ground is shifting under my feet, ready to open up and swallow me whole.
"We’re done, Clarise," he tells me sternly, grabbing the overcoat he has folded over his arm and putting it on. A slight breeze picks up and he buttons his coat, looking at me with a firm but sad expression. "Whatever there was between the two of us… It was only a fantasy. It wasn’t real."
"What are you talking about? You just said you loved me!" I cry out, feeling the tears start to sting my eyes.
"And what’s love if not a fantasy?" he whispers and, with that, he turns his back to me and starts walking down the cemetery path. I almost start rushing after him, but my pride keeps my feet glued to the floor.
No, I won’t chase after him and grovel at his feet like some stupid teenager. If he wants to break my heart, fine, but I sure as hell won’t let him see the pain he’s causing me right now.
Pursing my lips, I start walking back to the limo, clenching my jaw so hard that the bones in my face start to hurt.
"Take me home," I tell the driver as he opens up the limo door for me. I slide onto my seat and close my eyes, pressing my forehead against the window in my door. A few seconds later and the engine comes alive with its characteristic purr.