by Becky Harmon
Sabrina nodded. “I get it. When I came out, I stopped feeling comfortable around my family, too. I could choose to be myself and alienate everyone or pretend to be something I wasn’t.”
She tried not to breathe a sigh of relief at what Sabrina had revealed. She had hoped Sabrina was a lesbian since she had readily agreed to their coffee date. It’s not a date.
She took a deep breath and asked, “So, what did you do?”
“I avoided going home, too. Unlike your parents though mine stopped asking when I was coming to visit. Even after…”
Devon watched the sadness spread across Sabrina’s face as her voice trailed off.
“Anyway,” Sabrina continued. “My parents have never even suggested they come here.”
“Where do they live?”
“Seattle.”
“We’ll that’s a little farther than Maryland where my parents are coming from,” Devon said as she ripped the last bite of the cinnamon roll into two pieces. She handed one piece to Sabrina and slowly ate the other one. “What brought you to Florida?”
Sabrina started to answer and then stopped. Swiping her hair behind her ear, she smiled shyly at Devon. “A stupid reason that I’d rather not talk about. Besides, we’re talking about you and your favor.”
“Oh, right.” She could feel the heat flooding her face again. She had enjoyed chatting with Sabrina and had almost forgotten the question she needed to ask. “My parents think the reason I haven’t been home for Christmas is so I can celebrate here with my girlfriend.”
“Oh.”
Was that disappointment? Maybe it is a date.
She quickly continued, “But I don’t have one.”
“You don’t have a girlfriend?” Sabrina asked.
Devon shook her head.
“And you want me to pretend to be your girlfriend?”
She was relieved that Sabrina had made the connection so quickly. She nodded and then grimaced. “It’s terrible, right?”
“Yeah, it is,” Sabrina said with a chuckle. “But I’ll do it.”
She felt the warmth in Sabrina’s smile and for the first time noticed a dimple appear on her right cheek. It took a second for Sabrina’s words to register.
“What?” she asked in surprise.
“I’ll do it,” Sabrina said again. “When do they arrive?”
Devon shook her head. Had this amazing woman really agreed to her crazy scheme? She wanted to know why but she wasn’t going to risk asking and give her a chance to change her mind. For now, she would bask in the joy of the moment.
“I work day shift on Christmas. Mom said they would be here when I get off at three.”
“I work the overnight Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. Seven to seven. I’ll need to sleep for a few hours but I’m guessing limited exposure is probably better anyway.”
“Right. Less time for questions,” she agreed. “I ordered a turkey and sides from the deli on Seventh. If you could be at my place about four that’ll give us an hour or so to play nice and then you can run.”
“That works for me. When do you want to get together and discuss our nonexistent past?” Sabrina asked with a grin.
“I’m off until Christmas morning, so how about tonight?”
“I go in at seven, but I could come by your place about four or five?” Sabrina suggested.
“That works for me. I can text you the address.”
* * *
Devon answered the door on the first knock. Christmas lights lined both sides of the apartment hallway casting Sabrina in a multicolored festive glow. Her one-sided dimple was in full view along with the easy smile Devon already adored.
“Can I come in?” Sabrina asked, making Devon wonder how long she had been staring.
“Yeah, yeah, sure,” she said, stepping back. She had to admit she was surprised Sabrina had shown up.
Sabrina stepped inside and slowly scanned Devon’s living room. “Are you sure you live here?”
She followed Sabrina’s gaze. The barely four-foot-tall Christmas tree she had grabbed after her mother’s phone call stood dark and bare in the corner.
“I do have a box of Christmas tree decorations.” She pointed at the shoebox sitting on the table. “I just haven’t had a chance to put them up.”
Sabrina’s eyes widened. “All of your decorations are in that box?”
“Yeah. Why?”
“Well for one thing that box is really small but honestly I was referring more to the emptiness. Don’t you have any photos or personal belongings that you’d like to display?”
“I don’t like clutter.”
Sabrina chuckled. “Okay. How about if I bring over a few things to make it look more lived in.”
Before Devon could answer, Sabrina’s phone interrupted them.
Sabrina looked at the display and then at Devon. “I’m sorry, but I have to take this call.”
Devon nodded and turned into the kitchen trying not to listen to Sabrina’s half of the conversation.
“What happened? Is she okay?” Sabrina asked as she began to pace across the living room.
Devon watched her through the opening over the breakfast bar. Sabrina was clearly frustrated, and her anger was growing as she listened to the voice on the other end of the conversation.
“I can but I work tonight through Christmas. Why can’t—never mind. I’m coming to get her right now.”
Sabrina disconnected the call and shoved her phone in her pocket.
“Everything okay?” Devon asked even though she could see by Sabrina’s face that it wasn’t.
“I need to go.”
“I understand. It sounded urgent.”
“Yes, it’s my—I mean, it is urgent.”
Devon smiled sheepishly. “Is there another time we can get together before my parents arrive?”
“I’m sorry. I really was willing to help you.” Sabrina sighed. “In fact, I was looking forward to celebrating Christmas with you and your family. But now, well, my plans have changed.”
“I was looking forward to it too,” she said softly.
Sabrina pulled open the door. “I really am sorry. I need to go.”
She nodded even though Sabrina was halfway down the hall.
“I hope everything is okay,” she called after her.
She was shocked at how disappointed she felt. Sabrina hadn’t even been in her life for a day and she already felt the loss of her. She didn’t care that the con was over. It no longer mattered. When her parents arrived, she would tell them the truth and the charade would finally be over.
She dropped onto the couch. Whatever had pulled Sabrina away today was important and she was a little curious. Following up to make sure everything was okay was a good excuse to reach out to her after Christmas. And maybe she would gather the courage to ask her out on a real date.
* * *
Devon sat up and grabbed her phone when it beeped with an incoming text message. It had been almost five hours since Sabrina left, and she had done nothing but lay on the couch. Sleep would have been good, but she couldn’t get thoughts of Sabrina out of her head.
Sabrina’s name displayed on her screen with a street and number. She recognized the street from a nearby residential area. Was this an invitation to Sabrina’s house? Was the con back on? She didn’t care. She only wanted to see Sabrina. She responded with one word.
Now?
The answer came immediately.
Yes.
It took her less than ten minutes to shower and run out the door. A five-minute drive and she was pulling in front of a single car garage with the address that matched the one Sabrina had sent. The little one-story brick bungalow connected to the garage was festively decorated. Multicolored lights were wrapped around the front door as well as the porch columns and railings. She followed the small glowing snowmen that lined the walkway to the front door.
The door swung open as she lifted her hand to knock.
“Hey,” Sabrina said softly. “I�
��m sorry it’s so late, but I figured if you still wanted to try to pull this off then we didn’t have any time to waste.”
“I really appreciate this, but shouldn’t you be at work?”
Sabrina shrugged. “I had to take the night off.”
She thought about asking why but the cozy glow of the living room behind Sabrina pulled her attention. A large Christmas tree filled one corner and green garland hung from the fireplace mantel. She walked around the tan cushioned sofa and studied the pictures displayed on the wall. Sabrina holding a baby. One with a toddler and another with a little girl in a cowgirl outfit. She turned and met Sabrina’s eyes as she watched from the doorway.
Sabrina motioned for her to follow down the hall. At the first closed door, Sabrina quietly pushed it open and stepped aside so Devon could see.
A small body was wrapped in a bright blue dinosaur comforter with a bush of red, curly hair covering the pillow.
Devon stepped back and Sabrina softly closed the door. They walked silently back to the living room.
“Can I get you something to drink?” Sabrina asked.
“Sure, a Coke or anything is fine.”
She watched Sabrina disappear into the kitchen and then took a deep breath. Seeing the small child in the bed was surprising but not disappointing. She knew there was something different about Sabrina. Something that made her feel settled and at ease when she was around her.
She dropped onto the couch feeling the stresses of the day start to fade. Too many hours without sleep and the soft glow from the fake logs inside the fireplace made her eyelids feel heavy. The room was large, but the furniture was arranged in a cozy bundle in front of the Christmas tree. The lights danced across the limbs in a slow hypnotizing rhythm.
Her eyes flew open as Sabrina sank heavily onto the couch beside her. Two glasses of Coke and a small bottle of rum had been added to the coffee table.
Sabrina turned toward Devon. “Go ahead and ask your questions.”
“I’m not really sure where to start.”
“Fine,” Sabrina said with a sigh. “Allow me. She’s eleven. I would have mentioned her sooner, but she was supposed to be with her father through Christmas.”
“Why–”
“I was young. Everyone expected me to find a husband. He was a jerk. Still is, in fact. Lucky for me he left before Alexa was born. He came back into our life last year. I refused to see him, but I felt that Alexa was old enough to have a choice.” She shrugged. “And she chooses to get to know him.”
Sabrina added a splash of rum to her Coke, took a sip and continued. “Apparently he gave her chocolate donuts for breakfast this morning and she ate the entire bag. Then when she threw up, he demanded I come and pick her up. It’s for the best though. Now I’ll have her for Christmas.”
“I’m sure it was hard to let her go.”
Sabrina grinned. “I’ve got her back now, so it no longer matters.”
“Is he the stupid reason you ended up in Florida?”
“He is. His job transferred him, and my family expected me to follow even though we weren’t married yet. But enough about me. It’s your turn.”
Devon added a small amount of rum to her glass and tipped it at Sabrina. “Fire away.”
“Why would you let your parents think you had a girlfriend if you didn’t?”
“It was a moment of weakness to avoid facing my entire family at one time. I love them, but they tend to discuss my life like I’m not even in the room. They weren’t happy when I moved to Florida. Truth is I never thought ahead or realized how big the lie would grow.”
“Trying to live up to someone else’s expectations sucks.”
“Don’t I know it,” Devon said with a yawn. “So does working a rotating shift. I should head home.”
She wasn’t sure why Sabrina had called her here this late except to explain why she wasn’t going to be able to help her. It was a good sign though and maybe they could get to know each other after the holidays.
“Hang on a minute and I’ll walk you out,” Sabrina said as she disappeared down the hall.
Devon dropped her head against the back of the couch. She couldn’t remember the last time she had felt so relaxed. Sabrina’s house smelled like cookies and pine trees. The room was dimly lit by the Christmas tree and very, very toasty.
* * *
Devon stretched her legs and her toes immediately felt the cold outside of the blanket. She opened her eyes and was surprised to see the sun coming through the window behind the Christmas tree. She could hear distant voices and it took her a minute to realize she was still on Sabrina’s couch. She was so embarrassed. How had Sabrina explained her presence to Alexa?
She threw the covers off and sat up. Should she sneak out the door? No. She wanted to meet Alexa and besides there was no way she hadn’t already been seen. She took a deep breath and walked into the kitchen.
A smaller version of Sabrina sat at the table eating a piece of toast. She looked up at Devon. Her eyes curious round orbs.
“Alexa? Answer me,” Sabrina said as she turned to look at her daughter. Her face spread into a smile when she saw Devon standing in the doorway. “Alexa, meet Devon. Devon, this is my daughter, Alexa. Join us.” Sabrina motioned to an empty seat at the table.
“Good morning, Alexa,” Devon said as she sat down across from her.
“Hullo. Are you my mommy’s friend?”
“I guess I am,” Devon said, taking a drink of the coffee Sabrina sat in front of her.
“Can I get you something to eat?” Sabrina asked.
“No, I’ll stick with coffee. Thanks, though.”
Sabrina turned to answer her ringing cell phone.
“Are you staying with us again tonight?” Alexa asked.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because I have my own place.” Devon tried to answer Alexa’s questions while she listened to Sabrina’s conversation.
“Why did you stay last night?” Alexa asked.
“Alexa!” Sabrina chastised as she pocketed her phone and joined them at the table. “Don’t be rude to our guest.”
“I’m not! I was trying to find out what the plan was.”
Sabrina laughed, shaking her head at her daughter. “I told a friend about our agreement and big ears was listening. She wants to participate in our plan.”
“Our plan?” Devon asked.
“Yes, our pretend family Christmas,” Alexa said excitedly.
“Oh. I just assumed that was off.” Devon looked back and forth between them. Their faces were almost identical. Each of their eyes filled with mischief and excitement.
“So, what do you think? Do you still want to give it a shot?” Sabrina asked.
“Well, I’m not sure. My parents aren’t expecting a kid.”
“But they like kids, right?” Alexa asked.
“Well, I guess they do.” She looked at Sabrina. “I’m not sure we could convince them.”
“You mean you aren’t sure I can convince them.” Alexa said, sitting up straighter in her chair. “I’m almost twelve, you know. I can do this.”
Devon shrugged. “I guess I’m in if you guys are.” I must be insane.
“Yeah!” Alexa exclaimed, jumping up from her chair. “I’m going to pack.”
“Is she moving in with me? She’s going to be disappointed when she sees my apartment.”
Sabrina laughed. “I already told her your tree was bare. I’m not really sure we have enough time to get your apartment ready though. What if your parents came here?”
“Oh, I like that idea. Would you mind?”
“Not at all, but you should know that Alexa will probably still want to decorate your Christmas tree.”
She laughed. “That would be fun. Do you need me to stay with her tonight?”
“Really? That phone call was my last option for a sitter and of course she’s busy. Would you mind?”
“Not at all. When should I get here?”
“She’s fine during the day while I sleep but if you could be here about six that would be great.”
“I’ll be here. Now, I’m going home to sleep some more.”
“Thanks so much,” Sabrina said with a sigh as they walked toward the front door. “I’ll work things out for tomorrow night.”
“That’s Christmas Eve, you know. I have to work at seven Christmas morning, but I can stay until six or so.”
“Maybe I can get off early then if I can’t get the entire night.”
“Great. I’ll see you this evening.”
* * *
“You killed me again!” Devon exclaimed.
“That’s because you’re slow,” Alexa shot back.
She dropped the video controller on the coffee table and stood.
“Time for bed, speedy.”
“Ha. Ha. I’ll show you speedy.” Alexa ran out of the room and then returned. “Are you sleeping out here again?”
She fluffed the couch pillow. “I believe so.”
“Well, if you change your mind, I have a double bed. Or I guess you could sleep in mom’s room.”
She laughed. “That’s okay. I’m comfortable here. I’m sure you’re too old to be tucked in but yell if you need anything.”
She flipped off the television and listened to the sounds of Alexa getting ready for bed. She never imaged that she would enjoy spending time with a kid. Not that she hadn’t thought about what it might be like to have her own one day.
Alexa had openly shared her wishes for Christmas. And they weren’t only for presents. Alexa wanted things for her mom too. Alexa was starting to see her father for the jerk he was and in Devon’s opinion, Alexa was pretty much done with her deadbeat dad. She couldn’t help thinking that would be the best present Alexa could give her mother.
* * *
Devon opened her eyes to find Alexa sitting on the coffee table staring at her.
“What time is it?” she groaned.
“Seven.”
“What are you doing up? Do you need something?”
“I’m hungry.”
“Your mom’s going to be at home any minute.”
“And then we can go out for pancakes.” Alexa jumped excitedly.
Devon sat up. “I can make pancakes.”