He didn’t answer me for a good thirty seconds. When he did, his words were stark with honesty. If you weren’t here now, I would feel compelled to participate in the tyro, but in such a way that allowed me to keep my oath to help David at the same time it honored the bond between us.
You’d have sex with strangers.
No. I’d pretend to have sex with strangers.
How do you pretend to have sex?
You get naked and roll around with a bunch of other naked people.
Fury unlike anything I’d ever felt burbled up inside me. And you think that would be honoring me?
No. I think that would be getting naked and rolling around with other people. That is not sex, Fran.
It’s close enough to make no difference! I snapped.
You think not? Let me ask you this—you believed you had severed our relationship a year ago. How many men have you slept with since then?
You know full well I haven’t been with any man, sexually or romantically. What’s your point?
My point is that I did not believe our bond had been broken. I did not have then, nor do I have now, any desire to engage in sex with any woman but you.
I thought about that for a moment, strangely pleased by the little tinge of outrage to his words. But you would if you had to?
He sighed. There is no way I’m going to be able to continue this discussion without you becoming angry with me.
I was going to point out that was a cop-out, when Inner Fran piped up once again with yet another dish of wisdom: What might have been was not important. It was the here and now that mattered. You’re right. I won’t lambaste you for something you haven’t done.
I didn’t think it would happen, but you have changed, Beloved.
Matured?
Not in the sense you mean. Before, you were fairly insular, very reticent to become involved with anything or anyone. Now you are more aware of others. You are more . . . earthy.
I hope being earthy is a good thing.
Oh, yes. He let me feel his emotions. The little spark that had always been between us shimmered into an electrical charge of attraction that skittered down my back. I could feel him considering me, as if he was seeing me with new eyes, and what he saw pleased him immensely.
I basked in that for a moment before I realized David was saying something to me.
“Fran? Benedikt has said he would not attend the tyro unless you agreed.”
I looked from David to Ben, my emotions torn. On the one hand, I wanted to tell David to stuff the tyro where the sun doesn’t shine. On the other hand, I knew from feeling the strength of Ben’s emotions just how much this mattered to him, to them both. And while I didn’t have any qualms about dissing Naomi, I hesitated at giving in to jealous anger if it meant that David’s lion friends might suffer for it. “There will have to be conditions. I want to know exactly what is involved in the orgy part of the evening.”
Ben’s lips thinned. “I will escort Naomi to the tyro. She will name me as a new member. They will initiate me into the group.”
“With sex.”
“A group celebration of primal forces.”
“Sex,” I said, nodding. I held up a finger. “Condition one: no sex.”
“Agreed,” Ben said. David watched us warily.
“No getting naked and rolling around with other people.”
Ben frowned. “That is not sex.”
“I don’t care. I don’t like the idea of Naomi seeing you naked.”
Ben said nothing.
I gasped, and socked him as hard as I could on the chest. “You didn’t!”
“I have to take a shower sometime, Francesca. I try to do it when she’s not around, but there are times when it is inevitable.”
I seethed for a few minutes, and desperately tried to remember a curse I had learned when I was fourteen. When my mother found out that I was trying to practice what she called harmful magic, she grounded me for three straight months. “There will come a day, Ben, when I am going to settle things with Naomi.”
To my surprise, he grinned. “I look forward to seeing that.”
Don’t be so happy—I have a few things to settle with you, too. “Can you at least try to limit the nudity in quantity and time? Maybe just take off your shirt and hope no one notices your pants?”
“Yes,” he said gravely. I thought I heard David snort, but when I looked, his expression was blank.
“Condition two: no touching or kissing Naomi.”
“Francesca,” Ben said on another sigh.
“I don’t want you kissing her,” I said, realizing full well I sounded like a petulant child.
“She will be suspicious if I distance myself from her in that manner. I don’t enjoy it, if that’s what you’re worried about,” he said.
I ground off a layer or two of enamel. “Fine. You can kiss her. But I get to kiss other men. In fact, I think I’ll start with David.”
David’s eyes widened as I leaned toward him, reaching for his shoulders. Before my mouth was even close to his, I was yanked backward, onto my feet, and spun around to face a Ben whose dark oak eyes fairly spat flames. “You will not kiss other men!”
I raised my eyebrows and tapped my fingers on his chest.
His jaw tightened as David laughed.
“Fine,” Ben snarled, letting go of my arms. “I won’t kiss Naomi. But I can’t stop her from kissing me.”
I thought about that for a minute. “Fair enough.”
Once again, he looked surprised at my acquiescence. I made sure I kept hidden the thought that I’d just see to it that Naomi didn’t have the chance to try any moves on him.
“Are those your only conditions?” he asked.
“For now,” I said. “I reserve the right to include others at a later date.”
“And I reserve the right to qualify any subsequent terms,” he added.
I made a face, but stopped when David took my hand and shook it vigorously. “Thank you, Fran. I know that you must be anxious to Join with Benedikt, and I appreciate you putting it off on my behalf.”
I glanced at Ben. You’re going to hell for all those lies you told him.
I haven’t lied. The Joining has been delayed until such time as you feel comfortable with it. His mind felt shuttered, as if he was trying to keep something from me.
And if that is never?
Then it will still be postponed.
This is because of Naomi, isn’t it? I asked, trying to see what it was he wanted to keep hidden.
He didn’t answer. The patented Ben silence . . . but I was no longer a teenager intimidated by that sort of tactic.
Let’s say I was ready to Join with you right now. Why couldn’t you use that as your excuse for not wanting to indulge in the orgy at the sex party?
Unfortunately, Naomi knows enough about Dark Ones to realize the difference between a Beloved who is not yet Joined and one who is. If we Joined, she would know that you would take precedence in my thoughts, and that she could never hold sway over me. That isn’t the case now.
I didn’t know what hurt worse: the thought that Ben was willing to continue with the farce, or that I didn’t matter as much to him as David.
Francesca—
No, don’t say it. I am ashamed of myself for even thinking that. I gave him a chagrined smile. I’m going to have to get used to you seeing the real me, warty thoughts and all.
There’s nothing about your thoughts that are warty. I just wish—
I know, I interrupted. I’m being selfish and self-centered, and you’re only trying to help your friend. All right, we’ll help him.
David had been thanking me during that entire exchange, finally finishing with, “I can’t tell you how much this means to my pride and me.”
I was even more ashamed that I had put my own feelings so far ahead of his concern for his family. “There’s no need to thank me. Is there anything I can do to help you?” I glanced at Ben. “I assume Ben told you about my ab
ilities?”
David looked down at my black-laced hands. “Yes, he did. I don’t know how psychometry can help us now, but I appreciate you offering your assistance, and I’m just desperate enough that I will ask for help should you be able to give it. I just hope you forgive me for . . . er . . . bringing you here as I did. Benedikt told me to bring you without causing you any distress, and it seemed easiest to simply drug you.”
“I won’t say I enjoyed it, but there’s no harm done.” I looked around us, trying to figure out just where we were. We seemed to be in some sort of thickly wooded area. A faint thrum of noise sounded in the distance. “Are we near the Faire?”
“About seven miles,” Ben said. “This is a small wild-life preserve that David uses when he’s in the area. No one ever comes out—”
He stopped speaking when three people, two men each wearing half a horse costume, and a woman clad in a nude-colored body stocking and knee-length blond wig, strolled past with polite greetings.
“—here,” Ben finished, looking after the threesome.
“This is the weirdest town I’ve ever been in,” I commented.
“I’ll take you back to the Faire,” Ben said, holding out his hand for me. I took it, smiling to myself when he peeled off both sets of gloves, handing them back to me before taking my hand again.
“Will David be all right out there by himself? Well, by himself and with whatever oddballs are walking through the woods in the middle of the night in stage costumes?” I asked, glancing over my shoulder to see David waving at us before disappearing into the shadows.
“Yes. His kind prefers solitude to intense contact with mortals. Would you have really kissed him?”
My secret smile grew a lot bigger. “What do you think?”
He helped me down a gravelly incline, holding back the branches of a scraggly fir tree. “I think you were deliberately trying to bait me.”
“Then that must be the answer,” I said complacently, greatly enjoying the irritated look he shot me as he lifted me over a fallen tree. I debated pointing out that I was perfectly able to clamber over obstacles on my own, but decided to enjoy his show of masculinity.
Ten minutes later we reached a narrow dirt track. Ben’s lantern didn’t cast much light, but there was enough for me to see no bulky shape of a car. “We’re walking to the Faire?”
“No.” He tugged me after him. A few hundred yards down the track, it curved. As we rounded it, a black shadow loomed up against the darker trees. I stopped, a strange joy filling me. “Your bike! You still have it?”
“Of course. It’s a classic.” His lips quirked for a moment. “No helmets, though. Do you think your mother will be angry?”
“No doubt, but I trust you not to kill me or leave me brain dead,” I said, waiting for him to get onto the motorcycle before climbing on behind him. “At the risk of inflating your ego past bearable levels, I have to admit that I’ve often thought of the rides we took together. For some reason, they always left me . . .”
I hesitated, searching for the right word.
“Aroused?” he asked, looking back at me.
“Yes. I just didn’t realize that’s what it was.”
He grinned. I’m glad I wasn’t alone in that. The last few times, I was afraid I’d scare you off forever with the natural consequence of you riding in front of me.
Oh, I noticed you were in a very happy mood. I was flattered, to be honest. And more than a little intrigued.
He gave me an unreadable look before turning around to start the bike.
A little thrill ran through me at the combination of the motorcycle vibrating beneath me and the fact that I was plastered up against Ben’s back. “I’ve missed this.”
“As have I. If you want to drive, though, I’d prefer you wait until we get onto the road proper.”
“Hang on a second.” I wrapped my arms around him, made an unhappy noise, and slid my hands beneath the black leather jacket he’d donned. That wasn’t enough, either. Ben looked down in surprise when I yanked the front of his shirt out of his pants, slipping my hands under it to his bare stomach. The muscles there contracted as I spread my fingers out across their warmth. “Perfect. Let’s go.”
I swear I heard him mutter, “You have no idea,” but contented myself to rest my cheek against his shoulder, silky little wisps of his hair brushing against my face as he drove us through the night. I wondered if sex on a motorcycle was possible.
No, but it is on horseback if you have a very welltrained horse.
I pulled back from where I had my nose buried in his nape and pinched his belly. Stop reading my wicked thoughts about you!
He laughed in my mind, and I settled back against him, my heart and my mind, for the moment at least, at ease.
Chapter 10
The Faire was in full swing when we returned, the center aisle positively crammed with people. I could hear gasps of awe and applause coming from the main tent as Peter or Kurt and Karl did their magic acts.
“I suppose I should find Imogen and see if there’s been any word on my Vikingahärta.”
“She will no doubt be busy reading rune stones.”
“True. I suppose it’ll have to wait until later.” I stopped next to my mother’s stall, worry suddenly consuming me.
Ben, holding my hand, knew what I was thinking. His fingers tightened around mine now, offering comfort just by his touch. “Your mother is not only a woman not to be trifled with—she’s also a powerful Wiccan. I know you are worried about Loki, but I can’t see him wishing to engage in a battle with her for no reason other than to harm her.”
“Imogen said the same thing.”
“That is because Loki has no reason to harm Miranda, and every motivation to keep her safe so that he may use her to barter for the Vikingahärta.”
“That’s the only reason I could figure he’d be interested in seducing her. I mean, she’s not really his type. But what if he already has it? What if it was he who stole it?”
Ben looked thoughtful for a moment, rubbing his chin as he mulled that idea over. Such an action never failed to make my legs go wobbly. “It’s not beyond the realm of possibility that a god could control a lich, but I’ve never heard of it being done. To my mind, the lich indicates that there’s someone else involved who wanted the valknut. Just who remains unclear. Regardless, I don’t believe your mother is in physical danger.”
Despite a tiny remaining worry, I agreed with what he said. I had a feeling I’d know if something truly horrible had happened to my mother. I had known when I was little and in school and her appendix burst. Surely I would know now if she was being tortured or worse?
Ben held tightly to me as he forged a path through the dense mass of bodies. As he came up to a booth painted in black and red, he dropped my hand.
I’m going to stop in a few feet. Please slap me when I do so.
I beg your pardon?
Slap me. If I am to convince Naomi that you have some sort of a hold over me, we must give her a show.
Don’t get me wrong. I’m more than happy to slap you, but what on earth will that prove other than I’m pissed at you?
Just follow my lead. You’re hurt and angry with me, but you aren’t ready to walk away yet. All right?
I kept the thought to myself that it wouldn’t take much, if any, acting to depict those emotions, following Ben as he stalked through the crowd, his jaw set.
Yell at me.
“Will you wait for me, you great big wart on the bottom of a slug?” I shouted, running after him.
He spun around and glowered at me. I noticed from the corner of my eye that he had stopped right in front of Naomi’s booth, and that she, holding a tattoo gun, was watching us with a calculating glare. “I will not be spoken to in such a manner as that!”
I slapped him hard enough for him to feel it. He emphasized the slap by snapping his head to the side before slowly turning back to regard me with fiery eyes. “You will regret that.”
&nb
sp; “In your dreams!” I snarled, and shoved past him to storm my way through the crowds toward the trailers.
I assumed he would return to Naomi to make the most of the scene, but was surprised to feel his presence behind me as I stomped my way to my mother’s trailer.
Uh . . . should you be here?
Probably not, but unless you order me to leave, it would take a monumental effort to remove me from your side tonight.
Heat swept up from my chest as I realized just what he was implying. I’d all but given him the go-ahead to jump into bed with me, but he really was going to do it? Excitement fluttered in my stomach. Naomi won’t like it.
He thought something extremely rude about her that made me smile. I entered the trailer, waiting for him to close the door behind himself before I looked at him.
“I’ve wanted to have you alone for a long time,” I said, every bit of me tingling at the nearness of him.
“Even when you thought I was trying to control your life?” he asked, one side of his mouth going up in a smile.
“Well . . . I won’t say there weren’t some fantasies about decking you with a two-by-four mixed in there, but for the most part, even then. Ben, I know I sound like an inarticulate, confused twit—”
“No, you don’t.”
I raised my eyebrows.
“Perhaps you sound a little confused,” he admitted with a grin. “But I understand that this is of vital importance to you. Which is why I’m prepared to give you the space you need should you require more of it.”
“I appreciate that.” I bit my lip, trying to figure out how best to get his clothes off him without looking like that’s all I could think of. Which it was, but he didn’t have to know that.
“Are you sure you wish for me to be here tonight, Francesca?” he asked, and the meaning behind his words was extremely clear.
“I’m sure of that. But, I’m . . . uh . . . it seems a little crude of me to just tell you to strip, and then pounce on you. Although right now, that really does sound good.”
He laughed and gently pulled me into his arms. “We will do this slowly, all right? If you wish for me to stop at any time, I will.”
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