by Louise Bay
“It was exhausting, but I think I had a breakthrough by the end. He’s going to read the proposal.”
“You look so tired. Why are you doing this to yourself? You don’t have to work. Why not buy a yacht and become an international playboy?”
“Yeah, nice idea, but I don’t think that’s really me, do you? I really believe in this renewable energy thing. I know I can make it happen,” I said.
“Well at least get a decent place to live. This place is really starting to gross me out.” My sister had lived with me since following me to England from Chicago. We’d both had our reasons to escape Chicago.
“I’m sentimental about the place. What can I tell you?” I was still in the apartment I rented while I was in college. I’d bought it, and my two roommates had moved out eventually, but I’d never had time to decorate it so there were nicer places to live, for sure. I didn’t notice the stuff Beth hated. It was home and it was comfortable. I didn’t want to become one of those guys who started making some money and then felt the need to let everyone know. The wealth didn’t and wouldn’t define me. I was my father’s son however much I made.
“I’m going to start looking at new places for you.”
I grinned at her. “You mean for you.”
“Well for me too. But think how you can impress your dates if you bring them back to mews house in Mayfair or an apartment in Marylebone.”
“A mews house in Mayfair? You’re planning for me to drop a cool five million on a new house when I’m perfectly happy where I am?”
“Think of the women.”
“Now you’re being offensive. You think I can’t get girls without a big house?”
Beth laughed. “I admit, my logic is flawed a little there. You’ve never had an issue getting women. But how nice would it be to have somewhere new with more space and a nicer kitchen? And you could get a place without the rat problem or the damp problem or the seventies carpet problem.”
“Okay. You can look, but I’m not committing to moving.”
“Woohoo!” Beth flung her arms around me.
Seeing her happy was worth every penny of the money I was sure I’d end up spending on a new place. She seemed to be getting better and better since she’d moved to London. Chicago hadn’t been good for her, but in the last few years, she had blossomed. She was sober and about to graduate—neither of which I would have thought possible four years ago when she’d landed at Heathrow. Distance from our father and his new family had helped us both.
“You’ve not told me about Rallegra? How was it? How’s Robert?” Beth asked.
“He’s good. He says hello.”
“Did you enjoy your first day?”
I shrugged. “I think I ran into some office politics. The girl I’m working with on this Sandy article doesn’t seem to like me very much.”
“You mean she didn’t beg you to sleep with her within five minutes of meeting her.”
“I mean she called me a spoiled, entitled rich boy.”
Beth threw her head back and laughed. “Well she’s right about the rich.”
I shrugged. There wasn’t much that got me ruffled, but apparently being accused of being spoiled, entitled and rich by Haven did. Maybe it was because it was partly true, and I’d never seen myself like that. I grew up a cop’s kid. We lived in the south side of Chicago among the criminals my father arrested. It hadn’t been a privileged existence. I didn’t feel money had changed who I was, and I hated when it altered how people saw me.
“Don’t say that,” I said, disturbed by the label.
“What? That you’re rich? Why?”
“I don’t know. It’s not me.”
“Jesus, most people would be shouting it from the rooftops. You should be proud of yourself. I know I am. What you did with Energy Trade was amazing. Stop being so shy about it.”
“I’ve been lucky,” I muttered. Beth was my greatest champion, but even her praise made me uncomfortable. My father was the same. My feet were firmly on the ground and that’s where I was determined for them to stay.
“A little. Most of all you’ve worked hard, you’ve got a brilliant brain and you have some kind of chip in here,” she said, tapping her head. “It gives you great ideas and the ability to follow through with them. Jeez, and you say I beat myself up.”
Beth always saw the best in people. I swear she’d find the good in a serial killer. “What are you cooking?”
“You’re not so talented at subtly changing the subject though.” She grinned at me.
“Whatever.”
The following Monday, I was back at Rallegra.
“I saw your photographs in a gallery over the weekend. You kept that quiet,” Robert said. It was good to catch up with him again. I’d not spent much time with any of my friends since I started Energy Trade.
“You did? The one in Chelsea?”
“You have your pictures in more than one? You dark horse.”
“Just two. They don’t sell very well, but for some reason the owners still like to have them.” Photography helped me relax. I didn’t do it to make money, and I certainly didn’t tell my friends that they were in galleries. It was no big deal.
“From what I saw, they were selling just fine. You make me sick, you know that?”
I drew my eyebrows together. “Sick?”
“Yeah, you piss me off. The way you pick up a camera for fun and suddenly you’ve got galleries wanting to sell your work. You set up a company and the next thing you know, you’re selling it for millions. And the women? You couldn’t keep them away, even before you had money.”
“Dude, right place, right time. What can I say?” He made it sound like I had the Midas touch, but I’d been lucky and I enjoyed what I did.
“I have no idea how you have any friends because you make all of us look bad. Oh, that’s right, because on top of it all, you’re a really good guy. Piss off, I’m sick of your handsome face.”
I chuckled. “Okay, I’m out of here. I only came in to drop off your coffee, Mr. Boss Man. I’ll see you in five.”
I wandered into the room we’d used for Monday’s meeting and found Haven sitting in the spot where I sat last week.
“Good morning,” I said, unsure of what sort of reaction I would get from her.
“Hi, Harry. How are you?”
Okay, she was making an effort. That was promising. “I’m all good, thanks. You?”
I watched her. Her hair was still severe, and she was still dressed as if she were in mourning, but the light bounced off her cheekbones in a way I hadn’t noticed before. She would probably photograph well. Her lips were naturally pouty—
“Harry?” She broke my internal train of thought, and I realized I hadn’t been listening to her while looking at her.
“Sorry, what?” I asked.
“We’ve been given the green light to go to the first day of Sandy’s filming on Thursday. So it would be great if we could have a meeting—you, Jenny and me after this to agree on our approach.”
I nodded. “Oh, and thanks for the coffee.”
“I’m really sorry I overreacted.” She seemed worried and searched my face for a reaction. “I was stressed, and I have a lot riding on this interview. I took it out on you. I hear you’re really talented, and I’m really excited to be working with you.”
I started to laugh. I couldn’t help it. She was a useless suck-up, but I appreciated the effort. “Shall we call a truce?” I asked.
She quickly responded, “That would be great, and I promise to keep my bitchy side medicated and unconscious in future.”
“Oh, don’t do that,” I said, teasing her. “I can handle a little bitchy.” It was true. I liked that she was obviously passionate about what she did. She just didn’t manage to channel it in the right way.
Her eyes narrowed slightly, and she cocked her head at me as people started to file in.
Three
Haven
Harry had been good to his word—he didn’t seem
to be holding any grudges, and I was grateful.
“So, remember, let me do the talking. She’s volatile and I don’t want to upset her,” I reminded Harry as we headed to the building where we’d been directed.
“You think I’d piss her off.” He smirked at me.
Shit. I hadn’t meant it like that. “No, not at all. I’m sure she will love you. Better than me, in any event. I just don’t want to fuck this up.”
“So you keep saying.”
We showed our passes to the security guard and he let us through a door. “Follow signs for stage two,” he grunted.
We went down a dark corridor, which led us into what looked like a huge airport hangar with lots of scaffolding and people bunched at one end. My belly was fluttering with the unfamiliar. I’d never been on a film set before, and I didn’t know what to expect. I really hoped Sandy liked me. It would make interviewing her a lot easier.
“Come on,” Harry said.
I’d stopped dead. I took a deep breath and headed toward the people. The set started to come into view. I couldn’t quite make out what or where it was supposed to be. Was it an office or a call center? A squeal broke my concentration. I searched for the source and saw Sandy Fox with her hands thrown up in the air, staring in my direction.
“Oh my God!” she squealed again and started running toward me. She couldn’t be that excited to see me. I turned to Harry, who wore a shit-eating grin and was holding his arms out, ready to catch her. What the fuck?
Sandy launched herself at Harry and he spun her around.
“Hey, kiddo,” he said as he hugged her and winked at me over her shoulder.
I should have fucking known.
“Harry, I’m so excited to see you. It’s been too long,” Sandy said as she clung to him.
It was like I was in a movie. Nothing was making sense. All I could do was roll my eyes at the pair of them.
When he finally put her down, she grabbed his hand.
“Kiddo, this is Haven. She’s the journalist from Rallegra.”
“Hey, Haven.”
“Hi, Sandy, it’s a pleasure to—”
“You know you’re not allowed to call me kiddo anymore. You promised.” Sandy pushed out her lips in an exaggerated pout. I rolled my eyes again.
“Well, if you promise not to be a brat, I won’t.” He ruffled her hair. They seemed very familiar with each other.
“When have I ever been a brat?” she asked.
“Every time you drink?” Harry replied.
She threw her head back and laughed. I felt uncomfortable, as though I was intruding on a private conversation. Should I give them some space to catch up? They were completely ignoring me. Where could I go?
“How’s Dave?” Harry asked.
“He’s dating some guy and neglecting me.” She pouted again.
“I’m sure you have more than enough attention from your many admirers.”
“None are as handsome as you, Harry,” Sandy whined as she pulled on his hand, getting him to follow her across to the set.
“You’ll go blind if you keep rolling your eyes like that,” he whispered to me as he followed her. “Come on.”
As we got nearer to the action, the director scooped Sandy up and we were ushered over to a couple of chairs at the edge of the cameras and lighting equipment.
“So you know her, huh?” I asked Harry, desperate to understand the extent of their relationship.
“A little.” His eyes were fixed on the scene in front of him.
“I should have guessed. Go to school with her brother?”
“No.” He wasn’t going to make this easy for me.
“You haven’t slept with her, have you?” I was almost certain that he had.
“Nope.” Was he being deliberately obtuse? He was starting to irritate me.
“Why are you even working at this magazine? You clearly don’t need the money. Shouldn’t you be interning at an investment bank or something?”
“I know you find it difficult, but will you just try not to be bitchy for thirty minutes? If you had any sense, you would be doubly nice to me now that you know I know Sandy.”
Was he saying he could make things awkward if I didn’t suck up to him? “You’re blackmailing me?” I asked him.
He sighed. “Jesus, you’re hard work.”
“I’m the one trying to keep it professional. You clearly have a personal relationship with the subject of this article,” I said. I’d pressed a button I couldn’t turn off. I’d slotted into giving him grief and I couldn’t row back.
“You think consistently insulting me is professional?”
I didn’t. I needed to stop. I had to un-press my bitch button. I couldn’t work out what had started it. Did I resent his charmed life? The way everyone seemed to eat out of the palm of his hand? The way women began tittering around him? Check, check and check. I wasn’t normally this bad. At least I didn’t mean to be. The problem was that he seemed like a nice guy, and despite calling me on my shit, he didn’t seem to hold it against me. I pushed back my stray hairs into my bun.
“I’m sorry if you thought—”
“Stop it with your half-assed apologies. There’s nothing worse than the non-apology apology. Either apologize and mean it, or don’t bother. Don’t try to be clever and half apologize and think I won’t notice—like on the Post-it. I’m not dumb. Say sorry and we can all move on, but don’t dare say you’re sorry if I thought you were a bitch. It’s a cop-out. You were a bitch.”
I pushed my lips together. I’d always found apologizing hard until I discovered a way to do it without actually saying I was sorry. No one had ever noticed before, or they never told me they had. Shit. Shit. Shit.
Harry uncrossed his too-long legs and stood, clearly wanting to make every inch between us count.
He was right. I was going to have to try to be nice to him. I couldn’t have him turning Sandy against me, and I didn’t want him not to like me.
“Okay. I’m sorry for being a bitch.”
He slid his hands into his pockets and nodded.
I pulled out my laptop and took some notes. If I focused on the article, at least I would have less opportunity to be mean to Harry. I guess he couldn’t help it if he came from a privileged background any more than I could help not coming from one. I would try to make more of an effort with him.
There was a lot more to take in than I expected. I had thought I’d be tucked away in a dressing room, waiting for a break in filming, but being on set was fascinating. There seemed to be a lot of people not doing much but staring intently at Sandy and her co-stars as they ran through what seemed to be the same scene again and again and again. We were too far away to hear what they were saying, and no one had given us headphones. I checked to see if there was a free seat closer to the action.
“Do you think they would mind if we moved forward?” I asked Harry.
“I think if you were a little nicer to me, I’d ask Sandy to get them to move us forward, but as you’re not, I think we should stay put.”
It seemed I was being taught a lesson, like a schoolgirl who’d been caught talking in class. “Okay,” I replied.
“Okay?” he asked.
“Yes, if you think we should stay here, then that’s what we’ll do.”
“Okay,” he said, giving nothing away.
“I am sorry. I don’t mean to say those things. My lips get loose when you’re around.”
“Your lips get loose?” He turned to look at me and raised his eyebrows.
“You know, things just tumble out.”
“I think you’re a little crazy,” he said as he turned back to the set.
I nodded and took a deep breath. “You’re probably right. But there’s a little crazy in everyone, isn’t there?”
He chuckled. “In everyone worth knowing.”
My cheeks heated. Had he paid me a compliment?
“I’ll make you a deal,” he continued.
“What kind of deal?
”
“Something to focus your loose lips and to help me to pass the time.”
That sounded interesting. I looked at him as his eyes flitted across my face. He didn’t elaborate when I didn’t reply straightaway, he just kept his eyes on me. “Okay, what’s the deal?” I asked softly.
“I’ll help you get what you need from Sandy, but in return, you have to answer any questions I ask you completely honestly.”
“What sort of questions?” I asked. I was worried he was going to report things back to Robert.
He shrugged.
“Personal questions?” I asked.
“Maybe. Anything I want.”
“This is just between us? I mean, you’re not going to tell anyone what I say?” My heart had begun to beat rapidly. I was going to accept his deal.
“Of course,” he said as if he thought I was ridiculous for thinking otherwise.
“Why?”
“That’s the deal.”
“Are you blackmailing me?”
“Call it what you like. I just want to pass the time, and you want to get access to Sandy. Accept, don’t accept.”
I was being pulled toward him with each word he spoke to me. What was he trying to do? Keep me quiet? Gain control? A warm sensation passed up my spine, and I didn’t know if it was fear or anticipation. Before I knew what I was saying, I replied, “Deal.”
Jake
I grinned, but I kept facing forward so she wouldn’t see. A sense of victory washed over me. Despite herself, Haven was fun. You could tell that there was a little more to her than most of the women I came across. She was clearly ambitious and driven, and I admired that about her. I liked that she wanted to do a good job on this article, however vacuous it might be. And she was funny, sometimes not intentionally, but that clueless part of her was kinda endearing.
There was no particular question I had in mind for her when I suggested our bargain. I wanted to see if she’d take the deal. I was surprised she had. She might lie, but something told me she wouldn’t. Her pride would stop her. She liked rules and she’d stick to them. This might be fun, and it was better than being a victim of her loose lips.