“Come on,” she whispered. “Come inside me, James.”
He gave a strangled moan and pulsed deep, a stream of curses pouring off his tongue. Then the fantasy, like all fantasies, ended. James pulled away, re-buttoned his jeans and threw the condom in the bin. The tap surged behind her and she wondered how the stranger would have ended this scenario. By smacking her ass most likely. Thanks for the pussy, sweetheart, tell your man your cunt tastes like strawberries.
James didn’t do that. He pulled her shaking body into his arms and walked her into the living room, kissing her with slow, deliberate brushes of his lips. Charlie breathed deeply and it felt like her entire body exhaled. James laid her down on the floor, lowering himself beside her. The moment was so sweet Charlie didn’t care how many disgusting things she’d seen happen on this very carpet.
“That felt fucking amazing.” He kissed her neck. “Did you like it?”
She opened her mouth to say she was fine and an entirely different voice tried to speak. Please don’t hurt me.
“Charlotte? You all right?”
Charlie hugged her arms to her chest. “Yeah, I’m good. That was really intense but I liked it. I liked being the object of a stranger’s desire.”
James folded his big body around hers and the chasm in her chest closed somewhat.
Please don’t hurt me.
“I doubt that’s the first time you’ve been the object of a stranger’s desire, Blue-Eyes. In fact, I know it’s not.” He stroked his fingers over the torn babydoll still clinging to her breasts. “You looked like a fuckin’ angel in that getup. Sorry I got carried away.”
Please don’t hurt me. “Don’t stress, technically it was yours.”
James huffed into her hair. “I wouldn’t say th—”
He sat up suddenly.
“What? What’s wrong?”
A strange rattle came from the hallway and there was the unmistakable sound of the front door being opened. She and James exchanged looks of alarm.
“You expecting anyone?” he asked, clambering to his feet.
Charlie shook her head. “No one else has a key except Belinda.”
James got to his feet and stomped toward the door. “Stay here.”
Ignoring him, Charlie slung his discarded T-shirt over her head. She rushed into the hallway in time to see James bearing down on a bearded guy in a blue paisley shirt. It was Hawthorne, one of Belinda’s stoner friends. Judging from the crowbar he held, he’d just jimmied their front door.
“Hey, Hawthorne, what are you doing here?”
Hawthorn visibly relaxed. “Hey, short chick, where’s Belinda? She owes me and I need to collect, like now.”
“She’s in Canada. Did you break our door down?”
Hawthorne made a tiny gap between his thumb and forefinger. “A little. I knocked earlier and no one was here.”
“Oh sorry, I was out. Belinda’s back on Tuesday.”
Hawthorne stroked his beard. “Hmm, that’s annoying. I’m really sorry, short chick.”
“It’s okay, are you all right? Do you need money for something important?”
“Naw, it’s okay. How’s your Tai Chi or whatever?”
James, who was watching their exchange with a look of abject horror on his face, seized Hawthorne by his paisley shirt. “Get out of here. Now.”
“Relax, lover boy. There’s no need to get aggressive.” Hawthorne’s expression was one of weary disdain. He threw his crowbar over his shoulder like a gentleman’s cane and nodded to Charlie. “You can do way better than this douchebag, short chick.”
James growled like an angry dog. “I said, get the fuck out of here.”
“Okay, okay, later, kids.”
Hawthorne sauntered out of the apartment and James slammed the now-broken door behind him.
“Sorry about that. Cup of tea?”
James’ glare registered at around fifty thousand volts. “So strange men just break in here at night looking for money? When you’re all alone? What the fuck, Charlotte?”
“So, you’re saying you don’t want a cup of tea?”
“Charlotte.”
Urgh. She was terrible at confrontation. How to explain this diplomatically to a man who looks like a crazed archangel from the mean parts of the Bible? “Hawthorne’s the first one to, you know, penetrate the apartment’s exterior. Usually they knock for a bit and leave. But they’re not dangerous, they’re just sort of stupid. And high.”
James pinched the bridge of his nose. “Jesus Christ, Charlotte.”
“I can just forget about you calling me Charlie, huh?”
“Goddamn it, this is fuckin’ serious. You can’t be at home by yourself with men breakin’ in.”
Charlie sighed. “I’ll speak to my landlord, see if I can get new locks on the doors and windows.”
“You need to move the fuck out of this dangerous hell-hole. Tonight.”
“I told you, I can’t afford to do that.”
“You can’t afford to be safe in your own home?”
Charlie winced. “It’s not ideal, I admit that, but I know Hawthorne, he’s nice. It’s Belinda’s fault for not paying him.”
James gripped his hair as though he intended to pull it out. “You’re a sitting duck for whatever junkies your roommate forgot to pay before she fucked off to Canada. How could you put yourself in this situation, Charlotte?”
“Whoa, tell me how you really feel.”
James advanced on her. “Okay, Charlotte, I will. The thought of you being robbed or beaten or worse, makes me want to kill someone. A girl like you should never have been allowed to live here in the first place.”
Charlie scowled. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means you’re a tiny, little yoga teacher and it’s not fucking safe.”
“James, this ‘man of the house’ act is starting to get obnoxious.”
He laughed bitterly. “That’s funny because a minute ago you were lapping up my caveman shit. Maybe the smart thing to do here would be to put you over my knee and spank your naive little ass.”
Charlie froze. Her brain and sex struggled to process such a perplexing idea.
James patted his thighs, mouth a hard line. “Come on, Charlotte, you want daddy to teach you a lesson?”
Charlie wished she had a projectile handy so she could throw it at his obnoxious face. “Look, Tarzan, I know you’ve got a lot of protective feelings blaring through you right now but it’s uncool of you to use my fantasies against me. Do it again and you can leave and not come back.”
James placed both hands on his head and exhaled loudly. “I’m sorry. That was a dick move.”
He looked so lost, so frustrated, Charlie felt her annoyance evaporate. Really, his reaction wasn’t totally uncalled for. Hayley would have beaten Hawthorne senseless. Jordan would have maced him. Sophia would have had her airlifted to a safe house.
Good thing you’re so well versed in apologizing, Bell.
She stepped forward and wrapped her arms around James’ torso. He didn’t pull away. Charlie blinked up at him. “I’m glad you were here. I would have been scared if that happened while I was alone. And I do love your caveman shit. In the bedroom, where it belongs.” Not that we ever have sex in a bedroom…
To her infinite pleasure, James smiled down at her and brushed the hair from her eyes. “I’m sorry for being an asshole, Blue-Eyes. I don’t want you to get hurt.” He picked her up once more, cradling her around his waist. “I’m staying the night.”
Delight fizzed through Charlie’s veins like lemonade and she hated herself a little bit for it. “I don’t need a guardian, James.”
“Yeah, you do, Blue-Eyes, you need one every minute you live here.”
Charlie grinned. “What if I’ve decided it’s my fantasy to kick you out of my flat?”
“Then I’m going to keep you busy all night, darlin’. You won’t ever want to get rid of me.”
Chapter 14
James scowled
at the sunlight streaming through his bedroom window. How late had he slept? And why was he wrapped up in some kind of net? He shook his face trying to remove the clinging strands, and the person in his arms hummed. In a flash the disorientation cleared and everything made sense. He’d stayed at Charlotte’s place; he was in Charlotte’s bed and Charlotte’s hair was twisted around his face. They’d collapsed in here at some god-awful hour last night, exhausted from fucking. He flexed his fingers, trying to pump blood back into his arms, and waited for the usual irritation that accompanied spooning to surface. Nothing.
Well, all right then. Fine. Good.
James returned his right arm to where it had been, cupping Charlotte’s full, warm breasts. In the dim light he could finally see her room. It was nicer than the rest of the apartment; old as shit but camouflaged with framed photographs and brightly-colored candles. Her sheets were deep blue with lotuses printed on them. For some reason he found that charming. Without thinking, James pulled her closer to his chest and she made a soft, musical sound, like an orca calling to its mate. He smiled and it wasn’t until his mouth relaxed that he realized he’d been clenching his jaw.
Calm down, asshole. You’re with her.
He’d crashed out in plenty of strange places and woken up next to plenty of strange women, but not like this. He could give a girl his body, his cock, but spooning fell under the banner of “invading my personal space.”
You’re nothing if not generous, Hunter.
Even though he religiously avoided cuddling, he had to admit it felt pretty fucking nice having Charlotte pressed against him, like he was protecting her from some unknown threat. Which is ironic because the only thing she needs protection from is you, Jimmy-boy.
“Hey, stranger.”
Charlotte’s voice was thick and adorable. He leaned forward and kissed her temple. “Go back to sleep, darlin’.”
Don’t you know the sooner you wake up, the sooner I’m gonna leave?
“I usually get up early and meditate. What’s your excuse?”
“Grew up on a ranch.”
“Of course you did, cowboy.”
She wriggled around in his arms until they were face-to-face. “Do you want breakfast or a shower or something?”
She was giving him an out, knowing in that strange Charlotte way he was uneasy in her bed. He should go home and change for work but his mind was fixated on other things. The feel of her dark hair running itself across his bare chest, the way the weak sunlight turned her blue eyes navy and her well-kissed mouth into a big, ripe rosebud.
She smiled. “What?”
You look like my birthday. James put a hand through her curls and let the strands filter through his fingers. “Your hair, it’s so thick.”
Charlotte blushed. “My grandmother had hair like this. I think I get it from her.”
He kissed her because he fucking had to, and within seconds he was on top of her, the feel of her body beneath him drowning out every other thought. They kissed for an eternity, until she was squirming beneath him.
“James, do you want to? Do we have time?”
He put his mouth to her neck and inhaled her warm smell. “I’ve always got time for you, Blue-Eyes. Besides, I’m the boss, remember?”
She laughed and James reached up and snagged a condom from the box on Charlotte’s bedside table. It was already open when they came in here last night and the knowledge filled him with hot, inexplicable energy. He was pretty sure he was the only guy she’d been with since her relationship ended, which meant the condoms were from her ex.
Think again, Jimmy. That asshole fucked her bare, probably in the missionary position with his eyes full of reverent tears.
More pulsing energy flooded into his system. Had Charlotte said he was the best lay she’d ever had or was that just wishful thinking? He gave her rough sex, but did she miss a more refined kind of fucking? Was that what he was meant to do for her now?
Paranoid thoughts swelled inside him, leading him back where he never wanted to go. Acrylic nails trailing down his cheek, a familiar voice crooning in his ear. I couldn’t help it, James, you’re just so gorgeous. I wanted you so bad.
Goddamn it, enough.
He looked down at Charlotte who smiled at him in sweet anticipation, completely unaware he was so fucked-up inside. He could satisfy her. Better than any of the assholes that came before him, not just when it came to kink. If she wanted to make love in bed early in the morning, bring it the fuck on. It was selfish and vain, but he was going to be the best fuck Charlotte ever had. For the rest of her life boyfriends were gonna be compared to him and fall short. James seized his cock, trailing the head through her pussy.
“You wet enough, baby, or do you want me to eat you first?”
Charlotte grabbed his ass and tried to force him down into her pussy. “Please, just be inside me, James.”
He chuckled. Charlotte always let her eagerness show. He liked that about her more than he could say. “You’re so impatient, Blue-Eyes, makes me feel like I didn’t lay you right last night.”
She licked his neck and James felt his arm hairs stand on end. “You did, I just want more. I always want more.”
Nothing to worry about, asshole.
He slid inside her, mindful of the fact that she’d gotten sore last night. Charlotte’s cunt fluttered around him and he groaned, pressing his mouth to her neck. He kept his pace steady, trying not to crush her under his weight.
This feels way, way too good.
Unlike his usual morning sex, there was no hangover dulling the feel of her beneath him. Everything was fresh and new in the light of dawn and their bodies joined together like one complete thing. It was wrong, having dinner with Charlotte, staying the night, screwing her under the covers like a couple trying to make a baby, but even as doubts appeared they drained away. He had to be here, he’d fight anyone to stay inside her right now.
“James, can you hold me down?”
“Anything you want,” he grunted. “Anything.”
He seized her delicate wrists and pulled them over her head, pinning them with one hand. Charlotte’s inner muscles clamped around him, as though she was determined to draw the come up from his balls.
“Oh Lord. Tell me you’re close, sweetheart?”
Her eyes were wild. Desperate. “I’m so close, James, please keep going just like this. I need you.”
I need you.
The words went straight to his dick, filling him with a strange spiraling warmth. Gritting his teeth, he moved against her with that same excruciatingly slow rhythm, thinking about nothing but her. When she cried out and went taut as a bow against him he collapsed, finding his own release in a few messy strokes. He rolled onto his back and tugged off the condom.
Charlotte held out her hand. “Here, let me have it.”
He eyed her pert ass as she left the room and her tits as she returned. When she crawled back under the covers, James pulled her into his arms. God, she’s so fucking sweet.
He lay there for a while, watching the way her head rose and fell with his chest. He liked her, he was man enough to admit that. It wasn’t every day you found a woman so cute and warm and crazy in the sack. He could sleep in her bed and give her a few hugs after sex. It wasn’t that big of a fucking deal. She certainly didn’t act like it was.
Charlotte planted a kiss on his sternum. “Do you want breakfast?”
“What do vegans eat for breakfast?”
Charlotte laughed. “I’m sorry, words like vegan shouldn’t come out of your mouth. You should only say things like ‘home on the range’.”
James bit her shoulder. “C’mon, brat, answer the question.”
“Do you want pancakes?”
“Well, hell yeah, Blue-Eyes. How long you been a vegan for anyway?”
Charlotte shrugged. “About three years. My sister’s an environmental scientist and the more she told me about growth hormones and factory farms, the worse I felt. In the end it was easier to not ea
t meat than to eat it.”
She smiled. “Now when I go to a farm, I enjoy the animals more. I freaking love lambs, their tiny little legs…”
James traced patterns on her shoulder, wondering if he should open his mouth and let the words crowding his brain fall out.
“If you’ll forgive the cliché. What are you thinking about?” Charlotte asked.
“When I was a kid my sister Kelsey and I used to follow the cows around, give ’em all names, try to put bandages on their legs. I used to hate it when they got sent for slaughter.”
His voice trailed away and he continued tracing circles on her skin, avoiding her eyes. Charlotte’s eyes were full of questions, questions he found himself asking when his mood got black enough.
If you love cows so damn much, why do you help run a live export company? Why didn’t you study vet science like Kelsey? Oh wait, you were too busy screwing and throwing footballs and gettin’ applause for being a pretty boy.
“Uh, James, are you okay?”
With a start he realized he’d been glaring into space like a mental patient. What the fuck was wrong with him this morning? “I’m fine, Blue-Eyes. A little tired.”
Charlotte nodded. “You are very old.”
He seized her with a snarl and worked his fingers into her sides making her shriek and kick out at him. But even as he laughed, all he could think was what the fuck are you doing to me?
When she buried her face in his hair and kissed his scalp an air raid alarm went off inside his head and in an instant he was halfway across the room. “Can I shower?”
“Sure, I’ll get you a towel and start breakfast.”
The bathroom was freezing and as he stood under the lukewarm spray. What would have happened if Charlotte had been alone when that asshole broke in? The thought pricked him like a rusty syringe. She wasn’t safe here at all. Surely if Sophia knew about her friend living in such a dangerous shithole she’d drag her out by the ear. Clearly Charlotte had a stubborn streak and a whole lot of pride. He’d known she didn’t have a lot of money, but if she couldn’t afford anywhere better than this she must be really struggling.
Degrees of Control Page 15