Unable to make eye contact with him, she asked, “What do you want to ask me?”
“Mason said that I’m not really his brother. He said I’m someone named Alastair and that I used to work in the circus. Is he right?”
Her shoulders slumped. “I don’t know if your real name is Alastair or if you worked in the circus, but he’s right about you not being his brother.” There. She said it. The horrible truth was out in the open, and now she’d have to suffer whatever consequences came from it.
For a long moment, Jason didn’t speak. He didn’t even move from his spot near the door. She couldn’t be sure what he was doing, and she didn’t dare look at him to find out. Her gaze remain fixed on the piano keys in front of her, though she remained facing in his direction.
“Why did you lie to me?” Jason asked.
Tears sprang to her eyes. She didn’t know what was worse: having to explain it or the gentleness in his voice. “I didn’t see any reason why you should know. Appleton searched for anyone who might know you, but no one did. We didn’t know who you were. We found you on the forest road, beaten and left for dead.”
“What were you and Appleton doing in the forest?”
She sniffed and wiped her eyes. “Burying my husband.”
“Your real husband. The one I replaced?”
She nodded.
“So when he became ill, he died?”
“Yes,” she whispered. “And Lord Mason was going to come here to take his place. The title would have gone to him, and he’s worse than his brother was.”
Jason approached her, his steps slow as he crossed the room. Lowering his voice, he asked, “How did you plan to hide your husband’s death?”
“Appleton was going to tell everyone that he went on a trip. It wouldn’t have been uncommon. He’d traveled in the past. I thought that when people started getting suspicious, Appleton and I could gather enough money to disappear so that by the time everyone realized he was dead, we’d be long gone.”
“But then you found me?”
She nodded again and finally looked at him, afraid of what she’d see, but he didn’t seem to be condemning her as she’d feared. Instead, there seemed to be a spark of understanding in his eyes. Encouraged, she continued, “You look just like him. We couldn’t believe it. Our original plan was to ask you if you’d pretend you were my husband, but then you didn’t remember anything or anyone and…” She cleared her throat. “It just seemed easier this way. If you didn’t know the truth, then when Lord Mason came around, you wouldn’t have to hide anything from him, and you’d be innocent of the lie.”
“And you don’t know anything about my past? Anything at all?”
“No.”
He knelt in front of her and placed his hand on her knee. “I know what life was like for you with your husband, and I know what kind of person Mason is. I can’t fault you for doing what you did.”
It took her a moment to understand what he was saying, and when she realized he hadn’t condemned her, she felt as if a weight had been lifted from her shoulders. “Thank you, Jason.” She held his hand. “Thank you.”
“Anna, I need to find out who I am.”
She blinked and tried to make sense of what he was saying. “What?”
“In the carriage, I remembered a gentleman at Gretna Green who called me Alastair. That was the same name Mason called me tonight. That has to be my real name. I have to find out who I am.”
Her hand tightened on his as a flicker of panic came over her. “Why? What’s wrong with things as they are now? Someone wanted you dead. You were beaten so badly you would have died if Appleton hadn’t found you.”
“That’s not what I’m concerned about. I need to find out if I had a wife.”
“No. You didn’t have a wife. No one recognized you. Jason-”
“No one Appleton asked recognized me, Anna. And if someone did but they wanted me dead, do you think they would have said they did?”
“But you don’t remember anyone from that life.”
“Does that mean I’m supposed to forget my duty to a wife I might have had before Appleton found me? And what if there are children? What kind of gentleman would I be if I didn’t do right by them?”
“And what of your duty to me?”
He paused, his gaze going to their hands. With a sigh, he returned his gaze to her, his expression resolute even as pain filled his eyes. “If I was married, then our marriage is null and void. You know that.”
“But I love you. I don’t want you to go.”
“I love you, too, but I need to find out. If I find out there’s no wife, I’ll return. I don’t want to leave you, but I need to. I won’t tell anyone what I learned tonight. As for Mason, you have another problem altogether.”
He released her hand and stood up. Pacing to the window, he peered out of it and released his breath.
“He knows everything,” Jason continued. “He knows more than you do. I don’t know how, but he does. Obviously, he’s been investigating things for a while. I’ll talk to the servants, tell them I’m going to take a trip. I won’t disclose how long I’ll be gone, but I’ll explain that they must protect you. I don’t trust Mason, Anna. He knows more than we do about my past, and he wanted half of your husband’s money to keep quiet.”
Bolting to her feet, she hurried over to him. “Give him the money, Jason. Lady Templeton will marry him if he has it, and he’ll go to British India where he won’t be a threat anymore.”
“It won’t be enough.” Jason turned from the window and faced her. “I’m not so gullible as to believe he’ll be satisfied with half the money. He’ll want it all. You said he was eager for your husband to die.”
“To get the title, but Lady Templeton will come with more money.”
“And the more he’ll receive, the more he’ll want. I have a sense about him…” He shook his head. “I can’t explain it. You’ll have to promise me that you’ll be careful. Make sure you have someone you trust with you at all times.”
She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him, taking small comfort in the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. “Take me with you. If you turn out to have a wife,” her throat went dry but she managed to choke out, “I’ll say I’m your sister. Then I’ll do what I had planned to originally do. I’ll leave for another country and be out of Lord Mason’s way.”
He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. “I can’t take you with me. It’s too dangerous. The people who left me in the forest might find me. I can’t have them coming after you, too.”
“Then don’t go at all! Stay with me.”
He gently pulled her away from him. “I can’t. I have to know who I am.”
“You’re the Duke of Watkins! What more is there to know than that?” She burst into a fresh wave of tears. “Let the past be in the past. Whatever is out there can take care of itself. You’re the duke. You were in the forest when I needed you. You’re meant to be with me.”
“If there is no wife and children, then I’ll return to you.” He kissed her, and even if she didn’t want to admit it, the kiss was much too final. “No matter what happens, I love you. I’ll love you to my dying day.”
She closed her eyes and fought to think of something—anything—that would make him stay. But words eluded her, and before she knew it, he quietly strode out of the drawing room. He closed the door softly behind him, and within the next second, she collapsed on the floor, sobbing uncontrollably until she had no more tears to give.
Chapter Twenty-One
Jason could think of only one person who could start answering his questions, and that was the gentleman he’d run into the last time he was at Gretna Green. Don. If Jason remembered right, Don had referred to himself as the ‘fire eater’. He had no idea what that meant, but it was all he had to go on, and he hoped it would be enough to find him.
Time had passed in agonizing slowness since the night he left London, and the coachman he paid seemed to take
longer than his regular one. He supposed the time dragged on because Anna wasn’t with him. He couldn’t help but think of her with every mile that separated them.
Half a month of travel came and went before he reached his destination. He checked into an inn before he went to the front desk where the innkeeper was checking his books.
“May I help you, Your Grace?” the innkeeper asked.
“Yes. I was wondering if you’re familiar with a gentleman by the name of Don.” He chuckled. “You’ll think it strange, but he might go by ‘fire eater’.”
The innkeeper laughed. “Yes, I know the gentleman. Came here when a circus passed through and never left. Married one of the ladies who lives here. Come.” The innkeeper led Jason to the window and pointed to a lane not too far from the inn. “Lives down that way. He’s a blacksmith now.”
Jason thanked him and left the inn. As he walked down the road, he tried not to think of the day when he’d been coming through here in search of a priest to marry him and Anna, but no matter what he did, she was always on his mind. With a regretful sigh for how happy he’d been the day they married, he forced his attention to the task at hand. He found the blacksmith’s shop easy enough and entered through the open door. He recognized Don right away, even though the gentleman had his back to him as he shoed a horse.
“Pardon me,” Jason called out. “I was wondering if I might have a word with you?”
Don glanced over his shoulder. “Your Grace, I didn’t think anyone came to Gretna Green after they married.”
Jason stepped closer to him. “As I recall, you called me by another name last time I was here. It was Alastair.”
He finished with the horseshoe and gently placed the hoof down. With a shake of his head, he grinned. “I’m sorry about that. It’s just that you look so much like him.”
“What if… That is to say, I have good reason to believe I might be him, this Alastair that you speak of.”
Don crossed his arms and scanned him up and down. “You’re the same height and build, and besides that, you got the same face. But didn’t you say you’re the Duke of Watkins?”
“I’m not sure. I was hoping you could answer some questions for me.”
“Let me get this horse back into the stall. Then we’ll talk in my home.”
Jason nodded his consent and waited as Don led the horse in his direction. He balked and Don paused, stopping the horse.
“Does the horse frighten you?” Don asked.
“I’m trying to get over my fear of horses.”
“You really might be Alastair. Alastair fell off a horse during a routine and nearly got trampled to death.”
“I was?” Curious, he followed Don to the stall and waited as he secured the animal in it. “Did this have anything to do with a circus?”
“As a matter of fact, it did.” Don closed the stall door and placed his hands on his hips. “It was a new act. Do you remember it?”
“No. I don’t remember anything from my previous life. My first memory is of my new life. I woke up badly injured. I was at an estate being tended to by a lady who said she was my wife.”
“Except she wasn’t?”
“Not at the time. I came here to find out who I really am. A gentleman, Lord Mason, told me my real name was Alastair and that I used to be in a circus. You’re the only one who seems to know anything about me so I came here.”
“I remember talking to Lord Mason.”
“You do?”
“Yes. He arrived here the same day I talked to you.”
Jason rushed to the entrance of the stable and scanned his surroundings. He hadn’t considered that Lord Mason might be following him, but now he knew Lord Mason had in the past.
“I assured him you weren’t Alastair, but then again, I wouldn’t have even if I knew you were but had lost your memory. There’s something wrong with him.”
He turned back to Don. “Yes, there is. How did he get here? I saw no carriage with his crest on it.”
“He was in a carriage without a crest on it.”
Jason studied his surroundings one more time. He didn’t see anything that would make him suspect Mason was out there, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t lurking nearby.
“You think he followed you here?” Don asked, also examining the village.
“Anything’s possible.” And knowing Mason’s desire for money, he could very easily be biding his time until he could kill him. He had no proof that Jason wasn’t the real duke, which was his greatest obstacle.
Don patted him on the shoulder. “Come and we’ll have something to eat.”
Jason didn’t know what it was about Don that made him trust him, but he did. Without another word, he followed him to his home.
***
Anna sat at her piano and traced the keys. The days without Jason dragged from one to another, and for every day he didn’t return or send her a letter, the possibility she might never see him again grew stronger. Where could he have gone? If only she knew what he was doing. Camden wasn’t the same without him. She wasn’t the same without him. Did she make the right choice in returning here? Before he left, she made sure he knew she would leave London, but what if he forgot?
She closed her eyes and fought aside her nausea.
Appleton entered the drawing room and closed the door. “Your Grace, I haven’t heard you play anything ever since His Grace left.”
She opened her eyes, a tear falling down her cheek. With a sigh, she grabbed her handkerchief and wiped her face. “I’m not in the mood for music.”
“He didn’t say he’d be gone forever,” he softly began, “and when he left, he wasn’t upset with you.”
“But the longer he’s gone, the less likely it is that he’ll return.”
“We don’t know that.”
Unwilling to be comforted by his words, she turned from the piano and sighed.
“I realize it’s a small consolation, but if he doesn’t return, you’ll still have the child.”
Bowing her head so he couldn’t see more tears fall from her eyes, she knew he was right. In all the years she’d been unable to conceive, it struck her as a bittersweet irony that she should be expecting a child now. But without knowing where Jason was, she had no way of telling him.
The door opened and the footman said, “Lord Mason is here to see you, Your Grace.”
Now she knew she was going to be sick! She was ready to tell the footman to send him away when Appleton spoke up.
“I’ll send him away, Your Grace,” he told her before he left the room.
She gripped the handkerchief in her hands and willed Lord Mason to leave her alone. Jason had sent word to him that he’d be traveling for a while, so he shouldn’t be stopping by. But if she counted right, this was the third time he’d been by since Jason left.
The footman quietly stepped out of the room, and she finally looked up. The room was, mercifully, empty, but she could hear Lord Mason arguing with Appleton. She couldn’t make out what they were saying, but Lord Mason’s voice rose and Appleton’s remained calm. Why couldn’t Lord Mason leave her alone? Why did he continue to hover about? Was he hoping Jason wouldn’t return?
She placed her hand on her stomach and prayed she’d have a boy. If there could be an heir, he’d inherit the title. Even better than that, Jason would return. He couldn’t be married to someone else. Appleton assured her of that from the search he did. But what if he didn’t ask the right people to find that out?
Footsteps alerted her that Appleton was returning to the drawing room. She took a deep breath and glanced at him. “Is Lord Mason gone?”
“Yes, Your Grace. I told him he mustn’t return until he receives an invitation from His Grace.”
She nodded, wondering if he’d actually stay away. “What does he want?”
“He says he wishes to make sure you’re all right.” He paused for a moment and added, “I suspect there’s more to it than that.”
“What do you think he wants?”<
br />
“I don’t know. That’s why I think it’s best if he’s no longer welcome here until His Grace returns. His Grace isn’t a fool. He can handle him.”
“I agree. I didn’t think so in the beginning, but he’s proven me wrong.”
“He’ll return, Your Grace,” Appleton said. “In the meantime, I hope you’ll remember to eat.”
“I hardly have an appetite,” she whispered.
“That’s to be expected given your condition, but it’s still good to eat something.”
She smiled. “You’re always there to take care of me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
He returned her smile. “It’s a pleasure to be your butler, Your Grace. I’ll ask Cook to prepare some fruit for you.”
“Thank you.”
As he left the room, she turned her attention back to the piano and stroked the keys. If Jason did return, she’d play anything he wanted to hear, and if she made a few mistakes, then she’d just keep playing. She hoped she’d get a chance to play for him again.
***
“No, I can’t do it,” the footman whispered.
Mason stood with his horse and studied the manor Alastair stole from him. This place was his birthright, not Alastair’s. The title belonged to him, and Alastair had the nerve to hold onto Jason’s name and title even after he was exposed for the fraud he was. Looking back at Jason’s footman, he said, “Your hands are already bloody, Fieldman. Don’t make it worse.”
“What blood?”
“The Duke of Watkins died, and that was all because of you.”
Fieldman shook his head and glanced around to make sure no one overheard them. “No, he didn’t. The poison didn’t have enough time to work, and then Her Grace was tending to him all the time so I couldn’t slip the drinks to him.”
Mason impatiently waved his hand at him. “No, you fool. The poison did work. But the duchess and butler disposed of his body. Where and how, I don’t know, but they did. And somehow they found someone who looked just like my brother to take his place. Now that she’s with child, he’s conveniently gone to France?”
Her Counterfeit Husband Page 18