What the Heart Desires (Contemporary Erotic Romance)

by Adderly, Allora

  Kimberly simply smiled at him and then leaned her head against his chest. She liked the way she could hear his heart pounding beneath his soft, warm sweater. Clearly his reaction to the kiss had been every bit as strong as hers.

  It was nice to know where she stood.

  Chapter Three

  As time went on, Kimberley’s relationship with Felix blossomed. They started spending much of their spare time together.

  They settled into a comfortable routine. On Monday nights, they’d go to the theater. On Tuesday evenings, they’d go grocery shopping together. Wednesdays and Thursdays were off the table because Felix taught night classes at the local community college – such was the life of an aspiring academic. On Friday nights Felix cooked Kimberly dinner at his apartment and on Saturday night she returned the favor at her place. Sundays were usually lazy days reserved for doing household chores and watching television together.

  Kimberly was content with the new routine. It wasn’t exciting, but it was familiar and predictable and safe. She liked that. Maybe, she reasoned, excitement was overrated.

  It seemed Felix came into Kimberly’s life at the right time because he was the one constant when everything else was up in the air. While all was well on the relationship front, Kimberly’s work situation was something else entirely.

  Being a science major, Kimberly had figured the lab tech job at the hospital was perfect for her. Sometimes it was a little dull, but it paid the bills and was generally tolerable. Or at least it was until a change in management occurred. Then, it became a hostile, awful environment.

  The new manager was the devil in disguise. She was bossy and opinionated, critical and demanding. She had unrealistic expectations, no compassion and imposed all sorts of crazy rules that made no sense whatsoever.

  The effect it had on the staff was clear. Two of them quit after the first week. A few others displayed irritability and a lack of motivation. It was an incredibly difficult situation to be in. Going into that hostile place day after day zapped Kimberly’s energy and her professional drive. She found herself listless and upset more often than not.

  Felix listened to Kimberly vent night after night. She tried not to complain about her work situation constantly, but he assured her he didn’t mind. He was patient and tried his best to be supportive.

  “Have you considered a career change?” Felix finally asked one Friday evening after Kimberly finished telling him about a particularly brutal, soul-crushing week. They were standing in the tiny kitchen of his apartment, where he was chopping vegetables for a salad.

  “Yes, only every minute of every day!” Kimberly replied, frustrated. “You know how hard it is to find jobs relevant to our field. I’ll need specialized training to get the type of career I want and even then, who knows what the job market will be like. I’m planning to follow up on a couple opportunities I came across, but they’re probably long shots.”

  “Think positive,” Felix encouraged her. “Things just have a way of working out.”

  “I hope you’re right,” Kimberly sighed. “But enough about my evil manager and the hospital’s stupid new policies,” she said decidedly. “Let’s just have a good time tonight. Hey, do you want to go out to eat?”

  Felix looked up. His salad was half-prepared and water was boiling for pasta. “What, you don’t like my cooking?” he teased, sounding surprised.

  “You know I do,” Kimberly assured him, “but maybe a change would be nice. I think I need to get out and be distracted, you know?”

  “Alright,” Felix replied, shutting off the stove burner. “Where do you want to go?”

  Kimberly shrugged and then reached for the phone book that always sat exactly two inches from the kitchen phone. She opened it to a random page, scanned the restaurant listings and pointed at a Thai place neither of them had ever heard of. “How about here?” she suggested.

  ~~~

  Spontaneity wasn’t something that came naturally to the couple. Kimberly and Felix were both very much creatures of habit. Even so, Felix dutifully indulged Kimberly’s request to try something different.

  That was how they found themselves at a small hole-in-the-wall Thai restaurant filled with strange yet enticing smells. The menu, unfortunately, wasn’t in English.

  “You order now?” the young server said in broken English.

  “Um, we’ve never been here before,” Felix informed her. “What do you recommend?”

  The young woman held up her hands apologetically. “You order now?” she asked again. It was evident she didn’t speak much English.

  “Why don’t we just point to some random things on the menu?” Kimberly suggested. “Our dinner will be a surprise but that’s okay, isn’t it?”

  “As long as there’s no shellfish,” Felix agreed somewhat reluctantly. “I’m allergic.”

  A well-dressed man sitting at the bar turned around. It was evident that in the close quarters, he’d overheard the conversation. He had an amused grin on his face and a drink in his hand. “Need some help?” he offered. “There’s a lot of shellfish on the menu, actually, but I can suggest a few dishes if you want. The food here is fuckin’ amazing.”

  Felix’s eyes widened at the man’s colorful language. He wore a Rolex and a high quality suit. He was probably a businessman of some sort, and a successful one at that. He didn’t seem to be the type to throw curse words around in every day conversation, yet there he was doing exactly that.

  “Um, that would be great,” Felix replied politely, regaining his composure. “Thank you.”

  The food, it turned out, was fuckin’ amazing. The stranger at the bar made excellent selections and Kimberly found herself absolutely salivating over the meal. It was to die for.

  “Thanks again for your help,” Kimberly said to the guy at the bar as she and Felix were leaving the restaurant.

  He turned around, his piercing green eyes slightly bloodshot. Day old stubble covered his strong jaw. He’d loosened his tie and it hung haphazardly from his unbuttoned shirt collar. He was incredibly attractive in a slightly inebriated, rough around the edges sort of way. “No worries,” he replied, raising his glass and taking a swig of whiskey. “Have a good one.”

  ~~~

  Kimberly did, in fact, have a good one. Maybe it was the wine she’d had with dinner or maybe it was her desperate need to relieve some stress, but when Felix drove her home she found herself feeling rather frisky.

  “Come inside,” she demanded as Felix walked her to the front entrance of her condo and prepared to kiss her goodnight as he always did. “Stay.”

  Felix looked surprised, but not at all unpleased. “Are you sure?” he asked, as though the invitation was too good to be true. She’d never asked him to stay over before. In fact, they had yet to do anything more than kiss.

  In response, Kimberly grabbed Felix’s scarf and pulled him toward her. Then she kissed him hard, with more enthusiasm and raw, undeniable need than ever before. When she released him, he was chuckling.

  “Whoa,” he said, wiping his mouth. “You really are drunk.”

  “I am not!” Kimberly insisted with mock indignation. “I’m just a little tipsy!”

  They walked up the stairs to Kimberly’s place. Or rather, Felix walked and Kimberly stumbled. Maybe she had indulged in a bit too much wine, but who cared? She was entitled to let loose every once in a while…

  “I want you,” Kimberly announced as soon as the door shut behind them. She pulled Felix toward her bedroom. “Come here.”

  “Hey,” Felix protested, resisting. “Hey.” His tone was gentle, kind and even a little apologetic. “There’s nothing I’d love to do more than…be with you, but not like this,” he told her. “Not when you’re drunk. I don’t want to take advantage…I respect you too much for that. Besides, it wouldn’t be right.”

  That was Felix: always morally upstanding. Kimberly knew she could always count on Felix to listen to his conscience and do the right thing. Usually it was an endearing, ad
mirable quality, but tonight she found it frustrating.

  “Are you serious?” she demanded, feeling a little hurt and rejected.

  “Yeah,” he confirmed. “Sorry.” He sat on her bed, grabbed the remote control from the nightstand and flipped on the TV. “How about we find a movie to watch?”

  Kimberly sighed. “Alright,” she relented. “But I’m going to go take a shower first.”

  Chapter Four

  She’d saved herself. Kimberly was inexperienced, but she certainly wasn’t unattractive by any stretch of the imagination. She was a pretty girl with a nice figure and a sweet demeanor. Over the years, that definitely hadn’t been lost on the opposite sex.

  In her freshman year of high school, Kimberly had dated a cute sophomore named Will. Back then, “dating” had involved awkward group dates at the mall and walking home from school together hand in hand. (Actually, her relationship with Felix wasn’t all that different.) After a few months of innocent flirtation, Will had tried to get with her in the backseat of his car.

  Kimberly had put a stop that before it had even had a chance to start.

  It had resulted in her very first break up. Being dumped by a popular sophomore hadn’t been a pleasant experience, but Kimberly hadn’t regretted it…much. If anything, it had strengthened her resolve to wait. She wanted to give herself to someone who was worthwhile, so she’d committed herself to just that.

  Now, after years of being alone and longing for companionship, Kimberly had found Felix. She was glad they had taken it slow and she’d gotten to know him. Felix was worthwhile. Of that, she was sure.

  Although alcohol played a part in her invitation, the truth was Kimberly had been thinking about giving her virginity to Felix for a while.

  She’d imagined what it would be like.

  What she hadn’t imagined was that he’d reject her advances. Sure, he’d declined the invitation for noble reasons, but that didn’t matter. Regardless of his rationale, being turned down stung.

  In the bathroom, Kimberly stripped off her clothes and then stood in front of the full-length mirror. Her skin was smooth and supple and her body was toned. Like most women Kimberly felt she could stand to lose a few pounds, but now that she had a few glasses of wine coursing through her veins, her perception had changed.

  Kimberly’s breasts were large and firm, perky and gorgeous. Her pink nipples were already erect, a testament to her growing desire. Her belly was taut and the swell of her hips was both feminine and alluring. Kimberly’s eyes travelled lower, to the plump, hairless mound between her thighs.

  She kept herself clean-shaven because she liked the way her smooth sex felt when she played with herself late at night. She also loved how being bald down there seemed to increase her sensitivity.

  Kimberly didn’t lock the bathroom door behind her. She knew Felix wouldn’t come in – he was far too respectful and proper for that. But she liked the thought that he could come in.

  As she stepped into the shower and felt the deliciously hot water wash over her, Kimberly lost herself in a sexy daydream. What if Felix burst in right now, unable to resist the temptation of her body for one second longer? What if he yanked her out of the shower, bent her over the bathroom counter and pushed his throbbing erection right inside her?

  True, that probably wasn’t the way Kimberly wanted to lose her virginity, but even so, the thought was hot. She wondered if there was an animal hiding inside Felix, waiting to be unleashed. She doubted it, but it was still sexy to imagine.

  As her hands idly soaped up her breasts, pausing to play with her perky nipples, Kimberly’s mind wandered. For some reason she found herself thinking about the man at the Thai restaurant who’d helped them order. She was sure he wasn’t the type to do what was noble. No, he was the type to take what he wanted when he wanted it.

  Kimberly wasn’t sure how she knew that. Maybe it was the confident, almost arrogant way the man had thrown around curse words without a second thought. Or maybe it was because he looked like a successful businessman and, from what Kimberly knew, to succeed in the corporate world, one had to be ruthless.

  He’d be the type to knock down the door and ravage her.

  Kimberly’s hands traveled to her sex mound as she recalled the stranger’s casual demeanor, broad shoulders and piercing stare. She wondered what his rough stubble would feel like against her delicate skin; Felix always kept his own face clean shaven.

  She wondered if the stranger would take her virginity gently and considerately, or toss her around like a ragdoll, using her body for his own pleasure. Kimberly had always envisioned her first time to be the former, but right now, here in the shower, she found herself craving the latter.

  She wanted primal, animalistic passion. She wanted to be taken by a powerful man like the stranger from the Thai restaurant. She wanted to be just a little scared in the moments leading up to that first penetration.

  The water from the showerhead poured down on Kimberly’s naked body, both soothing and further arousing her. Steam hung in the air.

  With closed eyes, Kimberly slid her fingers along the slit of her sex. She could feel how slick her swollen, smooth gash was. Her juices were already pouring out of her and she hadn’t even begun to masturbate in earnest yet.

  One finger delved between Kimberly’s pussy lips and sought out her sensitive clitoris. The tiny nub was already swollen and erect, poking excitedly from beneath its protective hood. She teased the tender morsel expertly, causing it to grow even larger and harder.

  She wondered what her boyfriend’s gentle fingers would feel like stroking her most sensitive part. Then she wondered what the stranger’s fingers would feel like.

  When Kimberly felt her arousal heighten, she abruptly pulled her finger away from her clitoris. She always liked to tease herself a bit before the grand finale; she found it increased the intensity of her orgasms.

  Gently, Kimberly eased her middle finger into her slick, virgin orifice. She liked the feeling of fullness and often wondered what it would feel like to have a man’s member inside her. She was so tight down there that she wasn’t sure how something so big would fit, but that didn’t stop her from wanting to be filled up.

  With care, Kimberly slid her middle finger in and out of her snug hole. She did it slowly at first and then with increasing speed as her need grew. Meanwhile, the fingers of her other hand rubbed her erect clitoris in a circular motion.

  “Ooh,” Kimberly moaned aloud as her hips gyrated in pleasure. She was close. In a moment, she’d climax. She’d feel her vaginal walls involuntarily contracting around her finger as though it were a miniature penis. Her hips would go rigid and thrust forward in a blatant display of arousal. Her clitoris would throb and pulsate as a tidal wave of pleasure took her out to sea…

  “Yes!” Kimberly hissed as her belly tightened and a lightning bolt of pleasure surged through her very core. “Oh, yes!”

  When it hit, her orgasm was intense. Her entire body shuddered in pleasure as she let out a stifled moan of satisfaction. She only wished she wasn’t alone there in the shower.

  If Felix had heard Kimberly pleasuring herself in the shower, he didn’t let on. When she emerged from the bathroom wearing her white fleece robe, he was engrossed in a documentary about dolphins that had come on television.

  Kimberly climbed onto the bed beside him and cuddled up to him. He wrapped an arm around her, his eyes never leaving the TV screen. He’d taken off his sweater and jeans and was clad in just a brown t-shirt and adorably dorky cartoon character boxers.

  Briefly, Kimberly contemplated making another move. Maybe by now, Felix would be convinced that she was no longer too drunk to consent to sex. But truthfully, Kimberly’s orgasm in the shower had taken the edge off.

  Now, more than anything, she really just wanted to fall asleep in his arms.

  “Let’s get under the covers,” Kimberly whispered in Felix’s ear when the documentary was finished.

  “Okay,” he said agreeably.
He pulled the white duvet up over them, taking care to cover Kimberly’s back and shoulders. He wrapped his arms around her, resting his chin on her head. “Warm enough?”

  “Yes.” Kimberly could feel his heart beating in time with her own. She and Felix had never been this close, this intimate before. It felt nice. It was what she’d been craving for as long as she could remember.

  “Your hair smells good,” Felix murmured, inhaling deeply.

  In response, Kimberly kissed him, a small, affectionate peck. As she drifted off to sleep in his arms, she was vaguely aware of Felix planting a sweet, loving kiss on the top of her head.

  Chapter Five

  It was the best and worst thing that had ever happened to her. Kimberly was a wreck. Just when things were going fantastic in her love life, everything had to change. Why? It wasn’t fair.

  It was Saturday night and Felix was on his way over for dinner. Kimberly was making pizza, but she was so distracted it would be a miracle if it turned out okay. She kept going over what she was going to say in her mind, rehearsing it, but nothing sounded right.

  There was no good way to break the news to Felix.

  She fully expected to be single again by the end of the night, and the thought of Felix not being in her life anymore made her want to cry. He’d become such a constant, reassuring presence that she couldn’t imagine not spending time with him. She couldn’t seem to remember what life had been like before Felix became a part of it. She already felt empty inside.

  When Felix got to her condo, Kimberly buzzed him in with a feeling of dread in the pit of her stomach. She stood in the kitchen wringing her hands. Her anxiety was written all over her face.

  “Hey!” Felix called as he let himself in the unlocked door. “Is that pizza I smell? Yum! Homemade pizza is the best!” He stopped in his tracks when he saw the expression on his girlfriend’s face. “What’s wrong?” he asked, pizza temporarily forgotten. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes…no…I don’t know,” Kimberly replied, looking distraught.