“Well, that’s what you’re insinuating and you’re wrong. Grant is a good person. So is Blake. I don’t know the whole family, but it feels like you taught us to hate them our whole lives for no real reason.”
“That’s not true, I had several reasons. For one thing, I had to raise Logan to hate that family or he would get too close to the truth. What if he and Blake hung out together and someone noticed a resemblance like you did? Or worse, what if he wanted to date one of the Chamberlain girls? I couldn’t have this turn into a V. C. Andrews book.”
“And me?”
“And you had to stay away so you wouldn’t make the same mistakes I made. Whether or not those boys are as heartless as their father, they still have his sex drive. You can’t tell me that they haven’t made their rounds through this town. I thought it was better for you, healthier for you, to stay out of all that. I know they’re charming men, with those big blue eyes and strong hands. They smile and say soft words and you feel your knees give out beneath you. But they don’t mean any of it.”
“When Norman rejected me,” Kate continued, “I wasn’t just upset, I was broken. I had no self-esteem. I was convinced that I was ugly and fat and no one would ever love me. I didn’t even believe your father cared for me for a while. I thought he felt sorry for me. I didn’t want you to ever feel that way about yourself. You’re beautiful and talented and smart. I didn’t want their manipulative lies to destroy your self-confidence.”
“Speaking of Daddy and lies”—Pepper wanted to get off the current subject as quickly as possible—“what did you tell Daddy? Did you just seduce him and trick him into thinking Logan was his son?”
“No, of course not. You must really think badly of me after all this to say such a thing. Your father knows Logan isn’t his son. He’s always known.”
Pepper’s jaw dropped. Just when she thought she knew what was going on, she got hit with another bomb. Did that mean her father had lied to her, too? “What?”
“Your father had been in love with me since the eleventh grade. We’d gone out from time to time, but I didn’t let myself fall for him when I thought I could have Norman. He was away at college most of the time, but when he came home, he only had eyes for me. I want you to understand that it wasn’t some casual fling, Pepper. Norman and I wrote letters and talked on the phone while he was gone. We stole away to secluded corners of the lake with a picnic and made love in a field. I gave him my virginity because I thought he loved me. I was certain that once he graduated law school and came back to Rosewood that he would ask me to marry him. And then everything fell apart.”
“And you ran to Daddy once Norman was out of the picture for good?”
Her mother pressed her lips into a flat line of displeasure. “No. It wasn’t like that at all. Your father had always been a presence in my life. He was just there to help, to talk to. He was my best friend and that was all I saw in him because I was blinded by my love for Norman. I didn’t realize the depths of his feelings for me at first. After my fight with Norman, I ran to Vince in tears and confessed everything. I didn’t know what I was going to do.”
Kate shook her head as the memories of the moment replayed in her mind. “Vince held me in his arms and said that I was strong and I would get through this. He got down on one knee, right there at the gas station where he was working, and asked me to marry him. I thought he was crazy, but he told me that he loved me and wanted to do this for me. He insisted we could be happy together and that we would raise that child, and any other children that came along, as our own. No one ever needed to know any different.”
Pepper didn’t know what to say. In the last two weeks, her life had totally turned upside down. She’d hated the Chamberlains for so long. Now the waters were muddy, her own version of reality shifting the more she learned.
“I thought Norman loved me, but I learned what real love was when I agreed to marry your father. We eloped the next day. When your brother was born, Daddy held Logan in his arms and cried just the same way he did when you were born. Logan was his son; there was never any question of it for him. In that moment, I knew I’d made the right choice. We never had much, but it didn’t matter, because your father is a good man, probably a better man than I deserved. You and Logan couldn’t have asked for a better father. And as far as I’m concerned, I didn’t lie to you because Daddy is Logan’s father. He’s the one who taught him how to ride a bike and throw a ball; how to be a man and how to treat a lady.”
Pepper understood. Her father was an amazing man and she was a daddy’s girl at heart. She had never once had doubts about Logan’s paternity because their father had never given them any reason to doubt it. “Has Norman ever acknowledged in any way that Logan is his son? I mean, he obviously knows.”
Kate nodded. “Just once. I did my best to avoid him, especially when I had Logan with me. But one day, we were all at the Fourth of July picnic at the park. You were only a few months old at the time, and Logan was a rambunctious little boy, running all over the place. I had a hard time keeping up with both of you. At one point, I lost sight of Logan and I started to panic. A few minutes later, Norman walked up, holding Logan’s hand and he was covered in mud.
“Norman passed him off to me with the closest thing to a smile I’d seen from him in years. He told me he’d found Logan in a puddle with another little boy. He said that beneath all that dirt, he was a handsome child and that it must run in the family. Then he turned and walked off.”
Pepper couldn’t believe the man’s audacity. “What did you do?”
“I was shaken by the whole encounter, so I used my muddy child as an excuse to go home and I never went back. I was just so thrown off guard and Daddy had to work, so I was there alone. It was just easier to leave.”
“And he never spoke of or hinted about Logan’s paternity ever again?”
“That was it. It certainly made for an awkward parent conference when Logan broke Blake’s nose after school. I’m responsible for that, raising him to dislike the whole family, but I never expected him to get into a fight. It could’ve been so much worse. The one thing I can say is that Norman refused to make a big deal out of it. He could’ve gotten Logan suspended, but he talked the principal out of it. He said boys were boys, and once he got Logan and Blake to agree to stay away from one another, it was over and done.”
“What a saint,” Pepper muttered.
“No one is perfect, especially me. But I did what I had to do. I think both of my children have turned out well, in spite of everything.”
It was true. They had both grown up in a loving home. They might not have had all the latest and greatest clothes and toys, but they were happy and well-adjusted. Pepper credited her parents for that. They worked very hard to keep the roof over their heads and food in their bellies. But that didn’t change the truth. Logan still needed to know that the arrogant lawyer he competed with was actually his biological father. “We did. But you’ve got to tell Logan, Mama.”
Her mother’s eyes widened. “No,” she said with a shake of her head. “I can’t.”
“Why?”
“Because of your father. He took on another man’s child and raised it as his own. He’s a good man, and I won’t have him become the subject of town gossip or have Logan harbor any ill will toward him. You know how people are around here. He doesn’t deserve that.”
“But Logan deserves to know. Even if no one else ever finds out, he should know the truth.”
“What good will the truth do, Pepper? It will only hurt people, like it’s hurt you. I regret that I’ve had to keep these secrets, but I couldn’t risk Norman retaliating if the truth got out. If we were smart, we would’ve moved far from Rosewood and no one would’ve ever known the truth, but this was our home. I wasn’t going to be run off by the Chamberlains. In the end, things worked out the way they were meant to. I love Logan, and have since the moment I found out about him. I made the choices I had to make to protect him. I found the best father I could
for you and Logan. You are both our children in every way that matters.”
“He can’t go on not knowing who he really is. Logan needs to know that his business rival is actually his father.”
“I can’t do it, Pepper. You just don’t understand how hard this is. I couldn’t even admit the truth to you until you figured it out for yourself.”
Pepper swallowed the lump in her throat. “You will, Mama. Or I will.”
Thursday night, as Grant prepared to head home from the firehouse, he found himself at a loss. He wasn’t sure what to do with himself in the evenings anymore. He’d spent so much time with Pepper that it felt odd to return home to his loft apartment and not see her. He missed her. He liked sleeping with her in his arms. He enjoyed waking up with Pepper and her crazy morning hair, and sharing a cup of coffee. And yet, he didn’t want to constantly show up at her place and make a pest of himself.
When he told her he’d never seriously dated anyone, he’d meant it. He wasn’t entirely sure how to handle things. He’d also never found himself in the position where he wanted to see a woman every day. He’d thought at first that he was just intrigued by her because she turned him down. Pepper had been a new challenge. But now that they were past that point in their relationship . . . he still wanted her. She wasn’t just beautiful and infuriating. She was smart and funny. She was adventurous enough to jump on his motorcycle and drive with no destination in mind, but cautious enough to temper any crazy, reckless thoughts that might run through his head, like popping a wheelie on the bike to show off.
Leaving the fire station, he went down to where he’d parked his truck: a 1986 Chevy Silverado. It was hardly a glamorous ride; older than Grant was, the silver and burgundy paint was fading, it had rusty spots, and the seats squeaked with every bump in the road. But, it did the job it was intended to do.
As a southern man, Grant was obligated to own a truck.
Grant only drove it when the weather was bad or he needed to haul something around. Today, weather had made the choice. It had been a cold, wet few days—typical February weather for Alabama—and he’d had to park the bike for a while. Not even his waterproof leather gear could fight off the bone-chill that set in at higher speed.
Starting up the engine and cranking the heat, Grant turned toward Pepper’s house instead of his loft. He wasn’t entirely sure how he’d be received, but he couldn’t help it, the truck just instinctively drove that way.
He and Pepper had parted awkwardly on Monday night. He hadn’t meant to clam up when the conversation strayed to his father, but he also hadn’t wanted to ruin dinner talking about him. It had been a splash of cold water on the evening and it never really recovered. He’d driven her back to her car and went home to sleep in his own bed, alone.
Since then, life in Rosewood had been taken up by Estelle’s funeral. They had texted back and forth a couple of times, but he hadn’t seen her since he dropped her off outside the salon.
He didn’t know if that was a long time or not in a normal relationship, but to him, it felt like years.
This was something he’d never had before. Something he never thought he would have. At least, something he believed he was doomed to ruin, like his father had.
“I’m not my father,” Grant said silently to himself. If he wanted Pepper in his life, he could make this work. He needed to man up and take his life by the horns or he would end up one of those pathetic old bachelors who tries to pick up women in the bar and makes an ass of himself. Somehow that seemed even worse than becoming like his father.
His truck rolled to a stop outside Pepper’s house. Her red SUV was in the driveway and the lights were shining through her covered windows. He tapped at her front door, waiting anxiously until she answered.
The door swung open, revealing Pepper in a pair of jeans, a sweatshirt, and Ugg boots. She’d pulled her red curls back into a ponytail, looking casual, but cute. And she was smiling.
“You’re just in time,” she said cheerfully.
He was? “Good. Just in time for what?”
Pushing the door open, Pepper revealed her living room, which was scattered with various lengths and sizes of laminated particle board. “In time to help me put together my new entertainment center.”
“Of course,” he said with a chuckle as he stepped inside and closed the door behind him. “Lucky me.”
Pepper smiled and returned to her spot on the floor where she was reading the directions. In front of her was the start of the furniture—a set of three assembled cubes, one divided with a shelf for a Blu-ray player or DVR. “Grab yourself a beer from the fridge and join me.”
He grabbed a long-neck bottle from the fridge, slipped out of his coat, and sat down on the hardwood floor beside her. He glanced over the instructions and handed her the piece labeled “F”. “How was your day?” he asked.
She shrugged, focused on attaching piece F to piece M with a wooden dowel. “It was a little slow today. After all the excitement of the auction and the funeral, things seem to have finally settled back down. How about you? Anything burn down?”
Grant held the wood so she could screw a number four screw into it. “Not today. It’s too cold and wet.”
The conversation lagged awkwardly for a few minutes as they worked on the shelf. This was what he was afraid of. She wasn’t her normal, chatty self. She didn’t greet him with a hug or a kiss. Pepper could be preoccupied, but odds were, he’d screwed up on Monday.
“Listen,” he said, setting aside the screwdriver. “I wanted to apologize for Monday night.”
Pepper looked at him with her brow furrowed in confusion. “Apologize for what?”
Grant mirrored her look of befuddlement. She didn’t even remember what happened, so she wasn’t mad at him. And yet, there was a distance between them that wasn’t there before.
“Well,” he explained, “I was short with you at the restaurant. I don’t really like talking about my dad. I didn’t want him putting a damper on our night together, but it seemed to anyway. I didn’t know if you were upset with me about it.”
Pepper shook her head and set down the wood panel in her hands. “No. I understand how family stuff can be. I shouldn’t have pressed you about it. None of my business, really.”
“Then we’re okay?” he asked.
Pepper smiled and leaned in to kiss him. The contact was brief, her lips tighter than usual. “Yes,” she said, but he had a hard time believing her.
“Is something else bothering you, then? You seem a little . . . I don’t know . . . distant, maybe.”
Pepper sighed. “Sorry. I’ve just got a lot on my mind the last few days. It’s nothing to worry about.”
“Well, dump it on me. That’s what I’m here for. You’ll feel better if you can talk about it.”
“I really can’t talk about it.”
“Sure you can. You can tell me anything.”
She looked at him, a sadness in her dark brown eyes. “Not this.”
Grant didn’t like the way she said that. There was an ominous tone to her voice that worried him. “Don’t you think it’s a little early to be keeping secrets from each other?” he tried to say in a joking way, but she didn’t smile.
“I know you’re Mr. Honesty, Grant. And I promise to tell the truth whenever it’s humanly possible, but I can’t tell you this. I need you to leave it at that.”
He was so stunned by her blunt words, he didn’t know what to say. “Okay,” he managed.
“What are you doing this weekend?”
Grant let her change the subject. It was easier than trying to figure out what to do about this issue looming between them. “I work both days and then I’m off Monday and Tuesday. Seven on, two off, then I switch to night shift for another seven straight.”
Pepper winced. “Okay, then. I guess I won’t be seeing you much when you’re on nights. That’s a miserable schedule.”
He didn’t mind it. He wasn’t slaving away, standing on his feet twelve hours on
some assembly line, so the long shifts weren’t as bad as they seemed. “I get off at six. I’ll be able to meet you for breakfast before the salon opens, maybe. Or a quick dinner after the salon closes.”
“Okay,” she said, her expression brightening. “That’s not too bad. What do you say we knock this entertainment center out and I’ll make us some grilled cheese sandwiches?”
“That sounds good to me.”
They focused on getting the rest of the furniture put together. It didn’t take long once they put their minds to it.
Within the hour, they had the new entertainment center in place and Grant hooked up her electronics for her while she went to the kitchen to make grilled cheese and tomato soup.
Grant tried to focus on his chore, but he couldn’t keep the worries from creeping into his mind. What could possibly be so bad that she couldn’t tell him? He didn’t like secrets, and he certainly didn’t like his girlfriend keeping something from him so blatantly. Then again, who was he to point fingers? One mention of his father and he was looking for the exit. It seemed they both had things they didn’t want to share.
Chapter 14
“We have a one-car rollover with possible entrapment,” the dispatcher’s voice barked through the radio. “Location on Interstate 59, northbound near mile-marker 153. HEMSI already en route. Assistance requested.”
Grant and Mack hurried out of the fire station and leaped into the truck. It had been a long and busy day already. They’d had a small warehouse fire, three car accidents, and an older man who fell and broke his hip. They’d had to break down the door for that one.
With only a half hour left in their shift, they got the call for another accident. Grant prayed it wouldn’t be a difficult one. He was exhausted. All he wanted to do was grab a burger and veg out in front of the television. Even better if he could do that with Pepper on the couch beside him. He was hopeful she would accept the offer if he extended it.
Feeding the Fire: A Rosewood Novel Page 17