by T. S. Joyce
“My house—our house—isn’t very big. I just wanted to tell you before you saw it.”
“I lived in a small house with roommates and I stayed in my room as much as I could. I made people uncomfortable.”
“Why?” Brody asked, running his fingertips over a tuft of long stem grass that jutted up at an angle across the trail.
“I don’t know for sure, but maybe I reminded them of the people they attacked to get to where they are. I don’t think they’re inherently bad or violent. I think they run their clans in a way that gives too much power to the alpha and they always turn to war. There’s a long line of it, and lots of pressure to surpass the alphas before them. At least that’s what Nathan told me once. I think during peacetime their people don’t like to remember the bloody stuff—the awful things they’ve done to get where they are. I reminded them of that because I wasn’t one of them. I was one of Nathan’s trophies from a war, and they could probably tell I was angry over it. Fitting in was impossible, so I just didn’t try to after a while. At least in your house, I won’t have to pretend.”
“Our house.”
“Right, our house. That’ll take some getting used to.”
“Listen, if it’s not enough for you, we can apply for one of the bigger houses near Hannah and Riker.”
“Would you be happier there?” she asked.
“No.”
“You’ll feel stifled?”
“Yes.”
“Then your house will be just fine.” She bumped his shoulder but he moved farther away. The smell of bear became stronger and she stopped in the shade of a great spruce tree. “Stop.”
He paused and turned, his eyes bright. “Stop what?”
“Reverting to your bear whenever you think I’m getting too close. You’re confusing me on where to draw the lines.”
“I’m not comfortable with touching.”
“So we can fuck, but not flirt?” She crossed her arms and leaned against the bark. No way was she going to see her new home for the first time while this was being hashed out.
“Don’t call it that,” he growled.
“That’s what it’ll be. You’ve made it clear you want a shallow relationship.”
Somewhere nearby a locust screamed, and Brody ran his hands through his hair. He ripped his furious gaze away from her. “I dated a woman who liked to bait me, Joanna. I won’t go through it again.”
The anger seeped out of her at his admission, like air from a balloon. It was strange hearing he had a life before the insanity that had engulfed the last few days. She understood about toxic relationships and the tolls they took.
She pushed off the tree and started hiking again. He seemed to speak easier when he was moving. “How did she bait you?”
He inhaled loudly and helped her up a steep embankment. “She liked to fight. It was her thing. We couldn’t…” He threw her an annoyed glare. “We couldn’t fuck unless we were screaming at each other. I don’t think I ever bedded her unless I was pissed off.”
His hesitation around her made more and more sense. “Do you think it jaded you?”
“Sometimes. It was a long relationship and it trained my body. Fighting gets me ramped up now, like some sick natural response. I hate it.”
“Maybe…” She cleared her throat. “Maybe I could train you to enjoy sex without fighting again.” Studying a grove of young trees to the right, nothing in her wanted to see his reaction. It would only hurt her.
He snorted. “You’re going to train me?”
“That’s not what I meant.”
“The last woman I trusted with my training ruined me.” His voice was sharp like a blade and she tugged his hand.
He flinched away but she followed, trapping him against a tree that split into a v. He held his hands up, refusing to touch her and his gaze stayed frozen fast over her shoulder.
“Brody,” she said, gently taking the bag of her things from his hand. “You’re fighting and you don’t have to with me.”
His lips twisted into a cruel smile and he canted his head, then dropped his feral gaze to hers. “Has my training already started?”
She wrapped her arms around his waist and laid her cheek against his chest. “I won’t be intimate with you mad, Brody Bannister. We both deserve better. I’m sorry I said it wrong, but I was just trying to help. We can wait until you have better control of your bear around me. I have hang-ups too, you know.”
The silence stretched on and on between them, but at last, he lowered his arms and pulled her closer. “Like what?”
“Like I have been teased for two years by a man who wouldn’t let anyone touch me. I didn’t want him like that, but I missed being touched. Being denied intimacy the way I wanted it has taken its toll on me too.”
She was baring her soul to this man, this stranger, and hoping he wouldn’t crush her. She had no reason to trust anyone after what she’d been through, but she had to believe they could both be saved from the scars of their pasts.
His hands cupped her cheeks and with his thumbs, he tilted her chin up. His gaze was questioning and open and she closed her eyes just as he lowered his lips to hers. The kiss was gentle and slow and she molded against him as minutes drifted by. Still, he didn’t push for anything more and for the first time since he’d cut her at the pond, he didn’t growl when he touched her.
He eased back, his eyes smoldering. “Teach me.”
Chapter Eleven
Brody was letting her in. Just that little hint of vulnerability had cracked Joanna right open. He was strong, battle-hardened, and dominant to his core and still, he was willing to try something different for her. She wouldn’t waste the gift.
Brody’s house sat nestled in a grove of pines with the Bighorn Mountains behind it. Water bugs skated across a small pond out back and cattails swayed in the breeze. The house was small but not cramped. When he opened the door for her, she was surprised to see vaulted ceilings and natural wood floors that made the space appear much bigger than it looked from outside. The furniture was minimal, dark, and masculine. Every line of the wooden chairs, tables and bookshelves sang of Brody’s adoration for balance. She didn’t have any expectations coming in here, but the hominess of the cabin was a good surprise.
He held out his arm gallantly, and she settled her fingers in the crook of it, playing along with his game. He led her through the kitchen, apologizing when they came to a sink full of rinsed dishes that hadn’t hit the suds yet. “I haven’t invited a woman over in a while, much less…” He let the words lay unspoken between them. Bring a woman home to stay.
Her heart skittered and he tilted his head as if he could hear the rapid beating just behind her breastbone. Off the kitchen was the only bedroom and under a set of picture windows was Brody’s sprawling bed. The comforters were thick and colored in dark browns and blues, and the headboard was made of the same natural wood that the dining room set seemed to be made of.
She didn’t need to see any more. The rest she’d find on her own but right now, she needed his touch. She needed him to feel how much she already cared for him. As if he could read her mind, he leaned forward and gripped her waist, set his lips to hers. She couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe. He was everything as his hands trailed up the skin of her back, tugging her shirt with them. If her bandages were unattractive to him, she couldn’t tell. The quiet snick of her bra followed and he backed her to the bed, a low rumble in his throat.
“Shhh,” she said, tugging gently on the hem of his shirt.
His bear seemed to settle under her patient touch. Lifting his arms, he pulled off his shirt and she bit her lip against a gasp. He had been hurt in the fight with the Long Claws, or perhaps with Riker, and long healing claw marks covered his muscled torso. She traced the jagged edge of one. She should’ve noticed these yesterday, but she had been too hurt and scared to care about much.
He grabbed her wrist and turned his head slightly, as if to admonish her, and she let him hold it. Touch didn’t w
ork for him sometimes and she wouldn’t push, but sooner or later he would have to get used to being caressed by one person. His mate.
Trailing her lips down his neck and to the injuries he’d removed her touch from, his grip loosened and eventually released her altogether. Running her hands down the hills of his abdomen, she snapped open the button of his jeans and pulled the zipper. He brushed her hair behind her ear, much gentler than she’d thought he would, and his fingers lingered against her tresses like he had wanted to feel them for a while.
His erection, now free of his clothes felt as hard as stone when her hand brushed it and her stomach clenched, spreading warmth through her until she felt flushed. She’d never wanted someone so badly. His lips drank hers in, and she threw her arms around his neck as he walked her backward to the bed. The mattress hit the backs of her knees and she collapsed onto the soft covers. Brody’s smile was so damned sexy, a little moan escaped her lips before she could help it. His eyes widened, and the grin dipped from his face, giving way to desire. Holding her wrists above her head, he rocked against her hips. She wanted to scramble away from his hold and shimmy out of her shorts but he seemed to be enjoying the wait. It wasn’t like the teasing Nathan had done. Brody’s gaze held promise of giving her release.
Rolling off her, he pulled her free of the rest of her clothes and cupped her moist heat. Arching against his hand, he eased is finger inside her and she raked her nails through his hair. She wanted to take it slow, really she did, but she’d held out for the right man for so long. By the time she knew she needed to tell him to stop, her first orgasm came crashing through her. When she opened her mouth to apologize, he looked so satisfied, she swallowed the words back down. Dipping to her neck, he bit and nibbled his way down her, careful of the bandages.
“I’ve been wanting to taste you since I saw you,” he rumbled against the sensitive skin of her hip. His teeth grazed the top of her leg and she gasped as chills rippled up her body. He blew a puff of hot air against the fabric of her panties before he pulled them down her legs and tossed them to the floor. Exposed, she marveled at how she didn’t feel vulnerable like she had near Nathan. She couldn’t when Brody was looking at her like she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. He plunged his tongue into her, lapping her until she shook and whispered his name. She was so close, but he eased back and crawled over her.
“Please,” she begged as he hovered over her opening.
Another growl rippled through him but she let him keep this one. This one she liked as she watched his control slip. Slowly, he slid into her until he filled her completely. His hand gripped her hair as he stroked into her, and the languid pace became faster, more focused. She clawed his back as pleasure built inside of her. Arched, she closed her eyes as he groaned and spilled into her. She exploded around him, pulsing to match his own throbbing release.
Brody’s unshaven face scratched against her neck as he nuzzled her and she smiled at the ceiling fan, turning slowly in the breeze from the open window.
“You deserve an A plus and a gold star,” she murmured against his ear.
He chuckled and the sound of his amusement brought another layer of warmth through her. “That was…different.”
“Good different or bad?”
He rolled off her and propped up on his elbow. “Definitely good.”
She traced his jawline with the tip of her finger and rolled to face him. “I don’t think I would mind a good anger bang eventually, but maybe for now we should just keep trying to figure each other out like this.”
“Anger bang?” His voice sounded hard, but the smirk on his face said he was teasing. She liked when he was like this. Serious Brody had put a canyon in between them. This Brody made her heart pound just to be near him.
“We could pretend to fight if you want,” she teased. “I’m angry with the color of the paint you chose for these walls.” She tried to contain her laughter, but he tickled her ribs and buried his scratchy jaw against her neck again.
She tried to escape but he pulled her back and held her tight. Settling into his warmth, she listened to his heartbeat slowly drum against her cheek and sighed.
So quiet, she almost missed it, he said, “I don’t want to fight with you.”
Laying a kiss on his collarbone, she agreed. “Doesn’t feel right to me either.”
Brody’s phone chirped and he sent a dark look to his crumpled jeans on the floor. He moved to answer it but she pulled him back.
“Stay. For just a little while, stay with me.”
He cast one more look at his jeans, then pulled the covers over their legs and held her against him. She’d never asked a man to hold her after intimacy, but she didn’t tell him that. He would run away from those kinds of sentiments. But she couldn’t just let him go after they had shared such a moment—one that seemed so important.
The pain killers were wearing off and her stomach felt like someone had set it on fire, but she wouldn’t ruin this time with him for anything. With a happy little sigh, she burrowed against him and traced his shoulders and hips with her fingertip. And eventually, his breathing deepened and his hold relaxed, and she marveled that such a powerful, solitary creature could fall asleep in her arms.
And she fell for him a little more.
****
Brody already cared for Joanna more than he’d cared for any woman. He and Audrey had dated for three years, and his relationship with her had never scared him like this one. Joanna was asleep right now, unconscious to the world, and he still didn’t want to leave her side. He’d been staring at her for an hour, uncomfortable as shit, but not willing to move and wake her because then he wouldn’t be able to watch her sleep anymore.
More proof that he’d lost his mind completely.
Maybe making those marks on her body with the blade held more magic than he’d given the tradition credit for. No, it wasn’t just that. Something struck him in the gut the first time he had laid eyes on her. Something in her had called to something long buried within him, and sent them spiraling on a collision course. He just couldn’t decide if it was a good thing, or if fate was bound to destroy them both.
He allowed himself to think about his father again after all these years. About his mother’s face before everything had been destroyed. The man had cursed him in name and genetics, and because of that black-hearted demon shifter, Joanna might be in danger someday. The fear of endangering her had cut his nap beside her to twenty minutes at most. He couldn’t afford to lose himself to a deep sleep after bedding her for the first time.
Sleep was scary and made him feel out of control, and he’d never invited a woman to stay the night and accept that side of him. He wouldn’t be able to avoid it for long with Joanna, but he could keep the taint from their first time together by avoiding deep sleep. He wanted to be asleep with her and cursed his lineage all over again.
He brushed the thought aside, pressed it back in the darkest corner of his mind where his childhood memories belonged. His father wouldn’t ruin this moment for him. Brody wouldn’t let him.
A pounding on the front door drew a curse from him. He debated not answering, but the second round of knocking began and Joanna’s eyes opened slowly.
“Sorry,” he muttered.
She needed the sleep after everything she’d been through, both mentally and physically, but he should’ve known better than to ignore his cell phone. One person and one person alone knocked on a door like that, and that was the alpha. Riker was going to filet him for ignoring his duties.
Brody kissed Joanna on her forehead and slid off the bed, pulled his jeans on, then padded down the hallway to the front door.
“Meeting,” Riker said as soon as he pulled the knob. “Get dressed. And answer your damned phone.”
“Riker!” Hannah scolded. She stood on the gravel walkway behind her mate with her arms crossed. “I’m sorry, Brody. Apparently he’s forgotten what it’s like being newly mated. Which is impressive because it was like, five
days ago.” She yelled the last part.
Riker cleared his throat and took a long, steadying breath. “Hannah and Jenny are making dinner for all of us after the meeting, so please invite Joanna.”
“See?” Hannah said, looking triumphant. “That wasn’t so hard now was it?”
Brody bit back a smile at Hannah’s handling of such a dangerous creature. Riker could definitely swipe his entire grin away with one clawed slap. “Joanna,” he started as he turned for the bedroom, but she was already standing in the hallway, wrapped in his comforter and looking so damned delicious he wanted to blow Riker off and drive into her again.
“I want to go,” she rushed out.
He chuckled and nodded to Riker. “We’ll be there. What time?”
“Now, you asshole. I texted you ten times.”
Brody opened the door wider and gestured them in. “Give us ten minutes.”
Joanna had already unwrapped her bandages and turned on the tap to the shower by the time he left Hannah and Riker in the living room, so he shut the bathroom door and hopped in behind her. Her giggle was infectious as she lathered soap onto a washrag and scrubbed around his injuries, while he worked shampoo into her hair. He handed her a towel and rushed to his room to bite the tags off the rest of the clothes he’d bought her yesterday, then he dressed and shook the dampness from his hair and rejoined Hannah and Riker. Joanna came out a few minutes later in the blue stretchy shirt and black cotton shorts he’d purchased.
“You got anything more comfortable to hike in other than flip flops?” Hannah asked.
“This is all I have.” Joanna gripped her elbow and looked uncomfortable but Hannah waved it off.
“Jenny and I will take you shopping in the morning for what you need.”
Riker was already halfway out the door with his mate on his heels, so Brody took a moment to kiss Joanna thoroughly and show her he didn’t care what kind of shoes she wore on her feet. He gripped the damp strands of her hair and she gave off the sexiest little noise as she opened her mouth for him. Running her hand up the seam of his pants, she tempted him to lock the front door and take her hard and fast against the dining room table, and hang the meeting. But Riker stuck his head back in and yelled, “Brody, now!” successfully scaring Joanna into skittering away from him.