“Is that what I’m feeling?”
“That’s what it sounds like, but you’re not supposed to. Mating gives you lend of my powers, but not your own wolf…” He grabbed the cell phone on the nightstand and tapped a contact. “Dad. Yes. Can you come over? We need to talk to you. Thanks.”
He put the phone back on the nightstand and glanced at me pressed against the headboard.
Do you hate me?
I felt my brow wrinkle for a moment. It was purely in response to hearing his words in my mind. Slanting my head, I considered him.
“I was dying. They stole our choice. But you made the right one, Garrett. I’m glad I’m still here.” So no. I don’t hate you at all. Not even a little.
The look of terror, and the smell of his guilt dropped away. A little smile twitched in the corner of his mouth. “I was so scared you’d beat me with another branch.”
“I would have thought the coffee-to-the-crotch was worse.”
“It wasn’t my crotch, it was my head.”
I laughed. It felt good to laugh.
“I really thought I was going to die when I came down off that roof. The ground was coming up so fast.”
“Addi helped me catch you. You landed on my wolf.”
“You two… really?” My hand flew to my mouth. “Thank you, Garrett. You really did save my life.”
“I would have given mine for you.”
What the hell did I say to something like that? A moment went by and I decided there was no proper verbal answer. Instead, I sprang at him and slammed my mouth over his.
I kissed him with the fierce love I felt for him in my soul. I welcomed the taste of him as I never had before, masculine, chocolate, rich wine, and wilderness. I tangled my fingers in his hair and reveled in the soft feeling of his thick locks. I nibbled at his lips and possessed his mouth again and again.
And he welcomed me there. He welcomed my taste and my passion and possession as only someone who loves another soul-deep can.
Maybe I didn’t know Garrett as much as I should. Maybe I didn’t understand his world yet. Maybe some might think I was crazy for letting an age-old mating instinct drive us together. But there, as his arms wrapped around me, holding me tight to him, caressing my back, he shared my insanity for this moment.
I believed that moment was the beginning of our eternity.
Slowly, I pulled away from him, peppering little kisses for a moment more. My eyes wandered over his features, memorizing him, drinking him in.
I used our newly forged link. I love you, Garrett.
A grin spread across the kiss-swollen lips of the man—the shifter—I wanted to spend my life with.
And I love you, Jess.
“We’re still going to Hawaii someday.”
He grinned. “I heard there are some nice volcanoes and rocks there.”
“Am I interrupting?” Martin’s chuckle drifted into the room.
I yelped, knowing my naked ass was hanging out. I pulled the sheets around me as fast as I could, but both Martin and Garrett were unperturbed.
Sitting up, Garrett motioned his father into the room.
Garrett! I’m naked!
Sorry.
No, you’re not.
You’re right.
“I’m going to guess you’re not pissed at my son?” Martin settled into the chair on the other side of the room.
“Not even slightly.”
“I am happy to hear that. He was wracked with guilt and fear. But, my dear girl, don’t ever let him fool you. I was the one who suggested it.”
I wasn’t surprised. At all. That seemed completely in line with the Martin I was coming to know. “Well, then thank you, too. I much preferred to live.”
“I thought so.” He grinned. It was hard to believe that this incredibly sexy, young-looking man was my mate’s father.
Mate.
I was getting used to this.
“So. Why did you call? You know we don’t witness matings anymore.”
I made a face at Garrett, who shrugged.
“Well, we don’t. It’s true. That was ages ago when they wanted them witnessed, and it was during the alliances time. Now we mate for love, not power.” He nodded at his father sitting there. “Tell him what you told me.”
“About what?”
“The crowded feeling.”
I blinked a few times, then turned to the Alpha in the chair. “I feel like there’s more to me. Something under my skin. I’ve been describing it as a wildness, and it wants to escape.”
Martin steepled his fingers and stared at me. It was again quiet in the room for a while, and I could hear the thoughts whirling in Martin’s mind.
“Wildness.” He repeated the word. “Is it shaped or formed in any way?”
“It’s compact, neat. Growing, but not chaotic.”
“And it feels like it’s below your skin?”
“Yes. It wants to escape…” I paused. “Well, not yet. It knows that it will want to, but it’s still growing.”
Martin’s eyebrows shot up. “That’s interesting. Uncomfortable? Trying to crowd you out?”
“Not at all. Just there.” I felt the sensation seem to wiggle, snuggle in closer and changed my answer again. “Not right. It’s friendly. It doesn’t seek to harm me. It wants to be a comfort.”
Martin nodded slowly and studied me again. Finally he stood. “You have to take her to Grandmother.”
Garrett and I chorused, “Grandmother?”
“I think I know what’s going on, but she’ll know best.” Turning to me, Martin explained, “Grandmother is the oldest shifter around Mendenhall. She lives high up in the mountains around the glacier. She’s a bear shifter and a medicine woman.”
“She’s ancient,” Garrett offered.
Martin nodded. “She remembers when the land was only those of the many gods. There was no white man and their Christian God.”
I swallowed. That meant this woman was probably five hundred years old or better. And an ancient medicine woman. “Just tell me if what you think is going on is bad.”
“I don’t know. It depends on your interpretation of good and bad in this situation.” He looked over at his son sitting there. “Go to Grandmother right now. Don’t wait. No consummating this union yet. Just go.”
“It’s that important?”
A short, terse nod accompanied his answer. “Yes.”
* * *
I could feel Jess’s nervousness as we hiked up the trail on the land side of the glacier.
I couldn’t feel completely nervous about this. My mate, the woman I was in love with, loved me too. She wasn’t mad at me. She was as rugged and strong as I was, and she was amazed at her own strength now.
Grandmother’s house was tucked in an overhang that was covered by trees. The tourist helicopters passed nearby, but no one had ever really spotted it there. Some of the local pilots knew it was there, but never pointed it out.
Are you okay?
She laughed. I’m more than okay. Nothing hurts, and I’m not even winded. This is amazing.
I grinned and turned to offer a hand up on the last set of rocks. She took it and chuckled as I pulled her up and straight into my arms.
“I really wish your dad had given us just a few minutes. I really need you right now.”
I groaned, “Woman, I have been hard since you kissed me. My dick is killing me. I’m going to have permanent imprints from the denim.”
“Move faster, that’s not helping me either.”
We laughed and headed up the final path to Grandmother’s house as quickly as we could.
The house was covered in moss. The cool air from the glacier held water that collected on the trees and soaked the needles and trees around the pathway.
“Grandmother is eccentric, and one of the best people on the planet. She’s a treasure, and a nut.” I had met her a few times over the years, and I adored her. She was the best kind of crazy.
Before I even raised my han
d to knock, the old woman pulled the door open and grinned at us.
“Like spooked buffalo through my forest.” She laughed.
Her white hair was pulled back in a bun, neat but severe. Everyone expected Grandmother to be a short rotund woman but everyone forgot that natives were not subject to European standards. She was tall and slim and fit. Like all shifters in their human form were.
“Hello, Grandmother.” I grinned from ear to ear.
“Who is the woman? She smells like you.”
“This is my mate, Jessica. Jess, this is Grandmother.”
Jess was startled when the old woman pulled her into a familiar embrace. “I’ve been waiting a long time for you, my little one.” She let her go and walked us both into her house. It was cozy, neat, and full of memories.
“Waiting for me?”
“Oh yes, yes.” She strode over to her stove where there was a tea kettle waiting. She had three cups on the counter, and filled each. She glanced at us standing there and laughed. “You two look so confused! It’s adorable. Sit, sit. We’ll talk. I know you have a lot of questions.”
I held the chair for Jess and sat down next to her after pulling the chair over. I took her hand as Grandmother put the cups on the table in front of us.
“Okay, first, my Christian name is Tomasina, not Grandmother. My Tsimshian name Sagait-gaga’i. And I don’t expect you to remember that. It’s also a weird name to give to a bear shifter because it has to do with wings.”
Cocking my head, I was astonished. I had no idea that Grandmother had a Christian name beyond Grandmother. Jess giggled. “Did you think that her husband would have called her Grandmother?”
“A woman would realize that,” Grandmother said with a nod. “Now. There is tea, and there are questions. Go ahead.”
Clearing my throat, I nudged Jess. She raised an eyebrow, and then smiled.
“We were mated under what could loosely be called, not ideal circumstances. I was basically dying, and Garrett had to make a decision. He made the right one.”
“He did.”
Having Grandmother confirm that lifted another weight off my shoulders.
“I am sorry that this was a mess for you. Mating should be wonderful and erotic. Not the pain you two shared. There’s no redo on the official mating, but”—she lowered her voice conspiratorially—“I do know you don’t only have to share your blood just once.”
Jess’s shiver raced through me. I didn’t need it—I was still hard. Thank God for denim and tables.
Jess cleared her throat. “So, when I woke up this morning, I felt different. I mean, yes, I’m supposed to feel different, but both Garrett and Martin were confused by what I was feeling.”
Jess described the sensation again, and Grandmother sat in rapt attention, sipping her tea just once in a while. Her attention was focused, and after holding her tea for a long moment, slowly put it down.
“Are there words or ideas with this feeling?”
“No, just the feelings. It feels…”
“Embryonic. Like there is going to be so much more, but it must be allowed to grow and blossom?”
Jess nodded. “Exactly that.”
Grandmother offered a hand for Jess to put her own in. Jess placed it there without question.
God, this woman. She was so made for this.
“Ohhh,” Grandmother breathed. “Oh. My. This is wonderful. Just marvelous.” The grin spread on her face and she flipped Jess’s hand over and patted it. “Child, you are who we’ve been waiting for. Well, I have. You have been long anticipated by me and other medicine women and men. I shall send word of you.”
“What am I?”
“A new step in our evolution as shifters. You are going to signal the end of the moonborn. We shall have no more of that curse. And, you are the first of the new shifters.”
“Shif—wait,” I stuttered. “No human can shift. No human mate has ever been given that.”
“Things must change, Garrett. We have known that for a while. If we are meant to exist beyond this place, we must change. The gods know that. The earth knows that. The Thunderbird always protects us. And those who are good to the earth, the gods, and honor the Thunderbird will always be blessed.”
“Wait…” Jess leaned forward. “Are you saying I’m going to be able to shift?”
“Eventually, yes. Right now, your wolf is being born inside you. That’s why it’s wild and diffuse and just an idea. But as your wolf grows, and you nurture her, she will come into her own and you will be able to shift.”
“Holy shit.” The words fell out of me.
“Nurture her how?” Jess was intense.
Grandmother sat back. “Run with the pack. Smell the wilderness. See the moon, taste the fresh waters of the mountains. Sing the songs of nature and love. Be loving, be caring. Give her time, teach her what you—what we are. Listen to her.”
“How long until…”
“We are young for many years, but I suspect that because you are grown, she will grow quickly. Perhaps two years.”
“As long as that?” I asked.
“You greedy bastard.” Grandmother chuckled. “Let her learn the wolf. You’ve had a century to know yours. She will be able to run through the forest with you.”
“I’m really going to be able to shift?”
Grandmother nodded. “Yes, child. And I suspect that anyone whose true mate is human will gift the shifter to them as well.”
“We should warn people, then.”
“That would be wise, young Alpha.”
“So I’m fine. There’s nothing bad about this? I’d say normal, but my definition of normal is so out of whack…”
Grandmother laughed. “You are going to be an excellent leader when it’s time, Jessica. I’m glad you were brought to us.”
“Me too.” I grinned and kissed her knuckles.
Chapter Fourteen
Mid-September
I sat at the main table, surrounded by the women who were part of my now-very-long life.
We watched everyone around us, laughing and mingling, dancing, drinking in the long twilight that graced Alaska this time of year.
I inhaled deeply and scented the world around me.
I smelled home.
The pine of the Tongass, the cool salt of the ocean, the musty hints of Earth. And the chocolate and musk of my husband.
The grin was unstoppable.
He looked incredible in the semi-formal suit he wore with the boutonniere of berries and summer grass. His feet were bare—nearly everyone was to feel the last of the summer grass on our feet. He stood talking with Rick and Jason, who had become fast friends with us, and glanced over when he felt me looking at him.
His smile was my whole heart.
Home. Alaska. The St. Terese-Mendenhall pack.
What a damn change from June.
I would have never guessed that a shitty cabin in the backwoods of Juneau would lead me to the man—the mate—I needed.
“Are you thinking dirty thoughts?” Addi laughed quietly in my ear.
“I wasn’t until just now, sister-in-law.”
That killed Addi’s smart-ass remarks. “I don’t want to do a wedding.”
“Then don’t! Jeez, Addi. The wedding is up to you!”
“My parents won’t hear it. They want the wedding. I just want the party.”
In the eyes of the pack, Addi and Patrick were already married. Just as Garrett and I had been long before this party. The party was just a fun thing to do to celebrate.
“Tell them you eloped and that’s all you’re having.”
“They already have the church and the hall in town. I can’t get out of it.”
I patted her hand. “It’s one day. You’ll live.”
She stood, clearly intent on getting some more food, and leaned down. “I don’t want one day. I’d rather be naked in bed with your brother-in-law.”
I flipped her a finger as she walked away, and we both laughed.
&n
bsp; Brandy moved into her seat. “Did you decide?”
“Simon Fraser University.”
“Yes! Roomies!”
“Yes, roomies.” I smiled. “And you know, it turns out that my husband is really quite well-off. We’re getting a two-bedroom apartment and for the love of all that’s holy, please warn me if you’re having guests?”
Brandy went bright red. “Yeah. Sorry about that…”
“You are not even remotely sorry about that.”
“You’re right.” Brandy smiled through her blush. “I’m not. This is taking some getting used to.”
“Are you happy?”
“I didn’t know I could be this happy.”
“Then whatever. Enjoy it.” I patted her knee. “But don’t make me have to put soundproofing on the walls in your room.”
Brandy chuckled and stood as Zanna walked by. She waggled her eyebrows and followed after her.
Delia was the last one to move over and sit next to me. She didn’t say anything right away. She just sat and looked.
She finally turned to me. “You good?”
“I’m good. You?”
“I am. Mom and Dad don’t know exactly what to do about me wanting to live here, but they want to buy me a house.”
“Did you tell them it’s not really an option about living here?”
“Hey, Mom, Dad. I mated a wolf shifter and I have my own wolf growing inside me. Sorry I can’t come back to the lower forty-eight, but you know. Wolves and packs and shit.”
I chuckled. “They aren’t disowning you, are they?”
“Not even remotely. They don’t understand me, and never have, but they have always loved me and my brother without question. You know, parenting done right.”
“Says you, ten years after puberty.”
“True story.” She smiled. “But I’m grateful.” There was a small lull in her happiness and she looked at me. “Did… did Garrett pick Jason as enforcer because we’re friends?”
I shook my head. “Not even remotely. He told me he started to think about it before we knew you two were really an item. When the coyotes attacked and I was shot. Jason was insanely helpful, and Garrett took it upon himself without input to consider him.”
“Good, I’ll tell him that. He was worried.”
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