by Emma Woods
I fell into a tenuous sleep after midnight. I hit snooze four times the next morning before I absolutely had to get up or else be terribly late for work. When I arrived, Heather asked if I was sick.
“I have a headache. I didn’t sleep well,” was all I would admit.
“I’m sure you heard that Ty went back to St. Paul,” she added, not connecting the dots. “If you’re coming down with a cold, the timing is good, since he’ll be out of town anyway.”
“Did he tell Luke why he’s going?” I asked dully.
Heather shook her head, unconcerned. “Something came up with his old job or friends, I think. He’ll be back before long.”
Sure, he’d be back, but for how long exactly?
My sister-in-law scrutinized me. “Hey, if you feel really bad, why don’t you go home? We can cover you here.”
Nothing sounded better than climbing in bed, though my dark thoughts would be right there with me. Nonetheless, I took her up on her offer and returned home.
It was a long day. Danielle was home but working in her room. I laid on the couch and watched TV for a while, glad for the distraction, though every even remotely sad commercial made me burst out in fresh tears. The woman who couldn’t afford her medication got me every time that particular ad popped up.
Matt called after lunch. “Hey, Luke said you were sick. You’re never sick. Are you okay?”
“No,” I said and couldn’t hold back the onslaught of fresh tears.
“I’m coming over,” he said and hung up.
He didn’t even bother to ring the doorbell. He just came in and called for me.
“I’m in here,” I called and waited for Matt’s wonderful, bearded face to appear.
He handed me a cup of coffee and then sat down next to me, putting an arm around my shoulders. “What’s wrong?”
And then he had to take the cup back because I was crying too hard to drink. Finally, I told him what I’d seen the day before.
Matt’s brow furrowed. “That doesn’t sound like Ty. He’s not the cheating kind.”
“But Luke said that when Ty was living in St. Paul, Jenna had turned him into a different guy. Maybe that guy is the sort who cheats. And anyway, was it even really cheating? We’ve gone on one date and talked on the phone. We aren’t exclusively dating. And now he’s gone back to Minnesota. I think it’s just a matter of time before he decides that’s where he wants to live now.”
Matt handed me a tissue, and I wiped my red nose.
“I’m choosing to keep my faith in Ty. He really likes you, Rosie. I’ve watched him lately, and I know he cares a lot for you,” he argued.
I shrugged. “But if he liked me that much, would he have been sitting like that with Jenna? Would he have let her kiss him?”
“I think you need to give him a chance to explain.”
I shook my head sadly. “I might not get the chance for an explanation now.”
Soon Matt stopped talking about the whole Ty mess, and we sat and watched old reruns of The A-Team and napped on and off together. By the time he left, I felt like I might, one day, be okay again.
18
The rest of that week of work would have been the best I’d ever had, except that Ty was missing from it. Luke actually asked me to sit in on a planning meeting and listened to my suggestions. One of the supervisors was out for a day at the education barn, and I was asked to cover with the expectation that the other employees would defer to me. Heather even suggested that I be the one to call Rosa’s niece, Corinne, and talk about what to expect life in Birch Springs to be like. We really hit it off, and I was excited to learn she was going to come live at Bumblebee House with us.
But every time I glanced toward Ty’s empty office, a sour feeling filled my stomach. I avoided our table at lunch. I used one of those lonely lunches to call Donna and tell her I was coming in with her at the studio as a partner. Then I had only one more week at the ranch after Ty got back. Surely, I could keep from weeping at work for that long.
The worst part of all was that he was almost completely out of touch with me. If he would just call and tell me that everything was fine, I wouldn’t have been so devastated. But other than a few text messages telling me he couldn’t talk, I heard nothing.
And that lack of communication told me everything. It was obvious that it was over between us. Sure, he might return and try to let me down easy, but he might not. This might be all the closure I got from Ty Dondero.
Part of me would argue that he wasn’t the sort of guy to thoughtlessly drop the girl he was seeing. But then I’d remember Jenna in all her glory, kissing him while wearing her engagement ring. Luke’s reminder that Ty was a different person when he was around her would flare up in my memory, and I didn’t know what to think.
I avoided Sunday dinner with my family and spent the day distracting myself with a rom-com marathon with Jill and Mae after church. They’d been great supporters over the past week and seemed to understand that I needed some girl time.
But I couldn’t put Monday off. I drove to the ranch growing so anxious that I thought I’d be sick. Heather had already texted that morning and asked if I could help Tom, the foreman, with inventory. That meant I didn’t need to go anywhere near the office all day.
Inventory was a big job, and Tom kept me hopping. We paused and ate our lunches leaning against a stack of crates. Tom told me all about his daughter Sophie’s new obsession with outer space.
“Jill’s teaching a new unit, and Sophie is fascinated,” he said with a proud chuckle.
I tried to smile. It was wonderful that he and Jill were so in love and that his daughter loved her teacher so much. Still, it was salt in my wounds, and my eyes filled with tears I had to hide.
By five o’clock, we’d finished, and I hurried out to my car. I’d promised Donna I’d help cover for one of the evening tap teachers, who was out sick.
Just as I pulled open my car door, I heard Ty calling my name off in the distance. Pretending not to hear him, I fairly jumped into my car seat and scrambled to start the car and drive away. I was in such a rush I almost hit a minivan, but I got away without having to even look at him.
It helped, again, to throw myself into work. Tom had kept me running all morning, and the tap classes took my attention all evening.
In fact, it wasn’t until I was locking up after the last student had left for the night that my melancholy surged.
What would have happened if Jenna had stayed away? Ty and I were on our way to falling in love. To be fair, I was pretty much already there. He was my dream come true, and so kind and smart and handsome…. We would have gotten married and moved into his tiny apartment and eaten frozen pizzas and gotten a dog.
I almost couldn’t read the buttons on the alarm. I was crying for the nine thousandth time that week. Luckily, it was dark and I was alone, so it didn’t matter. Hurrying to get out before the alarm set, I shut and locked the doors, then turned and jumped.
Someone was sitting on the bench outside the door.
“You scared me,” I said, brushing at my eyes. Whoever this was, I didn’t want him to see my tears.
And, of course, it was Ty.
“I guess you’ve decided to become Donna’s partner,” he began as if nothing was wrong.
“Yeah, I did.” I wanted to run away. I wanted to give him a good punch to the gut. But I also wanted to throw my arms around him and sob and beg him not to leave me. “How was your trip?”
He shook his head, as if he was still unable to believe it. “I forgot how much I love the city.” And he went on and on about the great places he ate and the fun things he did and all the friends he’d seen while he was back. We wandered to our cars. Ty had parked in the space next to mine, right under a streetlamp that shone dingy yellow light onto us. I leaned against my driver’s side door, and he against his passenger side door.
“My old boss wanted me to come back and talk through some of the reasons I’d left the company. It turns out things
haven’t been going so well since I left. They realized what an asset I was and offered me my job back with a big raise.” He said it as though he could hardly believe his good fortune.
I nodded dully. So, he’d be leaving soon. Well, that was probably for the best. He and Jenna could be married in St. Paul, and Luke and Heather would fly there, and I wouldn’t have to know about it.
“That’s great, Ty. I’m happy for you. Listen, it’s been a long day and I need to get some sleep.” I tried to extricate myself from this painful conversation before I self-destructed.
Ty’s face fell. “I was kind of hoping we could talk. I really hated leaving without getting a chance to explain what happened with Jenna.”
I looked down at my hands and admitted, “I saw plenty.”
His eyes widened as he remembered what I might have seen. “Oh, man,” he groaned. “It wasn’t what it looked like!”
And instantly I snapped. All that hurt and disappointment balled together into anger. I couldn’t keep the tears from my voice as I said, “Well, I’d love to hear the explanation for why the two of you were cuddling on your couch and kissing. Oh, and why was she wearing her engagement ring?”
Ty looked horrified. “Rosie, I’m so, so sorry you saw that. I can’t imagine what you’ve been going through this week! I had no idea you’d come back and caught that particular scene. And then I went away and hardly had the chance to text.” He hit himself on the forehead with the flat of his hand before looking up at me with big, sad eyes. “I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me. I had no idea, I swear.”
I crossed my arms over my chest, fighting tears. “Just tell me what happened with Jenna.”
“Yeah, okay. So, she showed up at my door last Monday and said she was returning her dog to me. I let her in without really thinking anything of it. But once she was inside, she started buttering me up and telling me how much she missed me. She told me her brother had been killed in a car accident a few weeks back, which got her thinking about the time we spent together and how short life is.”
He looked pained and a bit embarrassed as he went on. “I really liked her brother when we met, and it hit me hard. She started crying and we sat on the couch. I gave her a hug because I didn’t know what else to do, and she ended up putting her head on my shoulder. And then, out of the blue, she started kissing me. I was so shocked I didn’t react right away. But as soon as I saw what was happening, I pushed her off and told her that wasn’t okay.”
It could have happened that way. But was that all that happened? “Did you see her in St. Paul?”
Ty sighed. “Yeah, once. Of course, it turns out that she knew that my boss was going to offer me my job back with a promotion. I think she decided to try and hitch her wagon to a star again. I went to her apartment and confronted her and asked for my engagement ring back. I told her I’d take the dog if she gave me the ring. So, I came back with both.
“I wouldn’t do that to you, Rosie. I wouldn’t ask you to go out with me and then kiss some other girl behind your back. Even if I thought I wanted to get back with Jenna, I would have let you know it was over first.
“Please forgive me, though, for not calling you and checking on you this week. I got caught up in trying to see everyone and do all the stuff I loved before I left. It didn’t cross my mind that you were back here in such pain.”
And I found that I did believe him. Ty wasn’t the cheating sort. He’d been thoughtless where I was concerned, but I saw that he hadn’t done it intentionally. He’d honestly thought I was fine, though I don’t know what he figured I’d thought about Jenna arriving out of nowhere. Truth be told, if I hadn’t been so intimidated by her and I hadn’t seen her kiss him, I would never have suspected that he had done anything remiss.
“Is there any chance we can have our rain check on Monday’s date sometime soon?” he asked sheepishly.
I closed my eyes. “I don’t know. Are you really thinking about taking the job in St. Paul?”
Ty ducked his head and kicked at the ground. “I can’t help but consider it. I mean, I really love living in the city, believe it or not. I forgot just how much. And the job is a great one for me with a huge pay raise. It’s hard not to imagine taking it.”
My stomach tightened. I pressed my lips together and found I couldn’t look at him any longer. “Look, Ty, if you’re heading back to St. Paul, I don’t think there’s any point in the two of us seeing each other anymore.”
He was clearly stunned by this. Slowly, he nodded. “I guess it would be hard to keep things going long-distance.”
“Right. I mean, this sounds like a great job opportunity, and you obviously miss living in the city. I guess this is your chance to get back there.”
I could feel him searching my face with his too-perceptive eyes, so I fixed my gaze off to the side, not giving anything away.
“Yeah, I guess,” he said sadly.
“Well, I’ll see you around work for the rest of the week.”
Without waiting, I unlocked my car, got in and backed onto the street. I drove three blocks away before pulling into the elementary school parking lot and giving into the storm of emotions that was building in my chest. I’d ended it. I’d actually dated Ty Dondero, and I’d ended things.
Nothing else in my life had ever hurt this badly.
19
I was filling in for a ranch hand the next day. This kept me out riding, caring for cattle and horses away from most everyone. It was nice to have the space, but the quiet wasn’t so great. After another long, sleepless night, I was tired of thinking. I’d gone over and over the situation and tried to find a way that Ty and I could end up together. But if he wanted to move back to St. Paul, I didn’t want to stand in his way.
Everything would have been different if Ty had argued that he wanted to be with me more than he wanted to go back to St. Paul. He could have announced that he loved the city but loved me more. But he didn’t.
And as I rode along, I thought about how much of a country girl I was. Sure, I loved ballet, but I also loved riding horses and the way the sky seemed endless when the sun was shining on really clear days. I doubted that I could adjust to life in a city. I hated traffic and not knowing your neighbors. If Ty wanted to live in St. Paul, we didn’t have a future.
So when I came in at the end of the day and found Luke waiting for me, a worried frown firmly fixed on his face, my stomach sank even lower than before.
“Can I talk to you for a minute?” he asked as soon as my boots were on the ground.
I stretched my lower back and followed my brother to a quiet piece of fence.
“Ty told me today he’s planning on moving back to Minnesota. Do you know about this?”
I sighed and looked out over the corral. “Yeah, I do.”
Luke’s eyebrows shot up. “I thought the two of you were dating.”
“We were,” I answered simply.
For once, Luke was perceptive. “Oh, no, Rosemarie. I’m sorry.”
I stared at my boots and nodded numbly. “He realized how much he loves city life and wants to go back.”
Luke was quiet so long that I glanced up at his face. He looked confused.
“What?” I asked.
“It’s just, that isn’t the impression I got. It seemed to me that he was leaving because the two of you split up.”
I rolled my eyes. “That’s not what happened.” And then everything spilled out. “I’m not the kind of girl he wants, Luke,” I said as I finished the gruesome tale of Ty and Jenna on the couch. “I’m not glamorous or cosmopolitan. I wear old t-shirts and ratty jeans. I smell like horses half the time, for crying out loud! If Ty wants to live in the city, I’m not the girl for him. It was stupid of me to think I could be.” I brushed angrily at the tears rolling down my cheeks.
Luke pulled me into a hug and I leaned against him, letting his shirt absorb the worst of my sadness. He didn’t try and tell me I was wrong, which was probably the first time ever.
/> After several minutes, I pushed back to my own feet and said, “I need to get home and take a shower.”
“Yeah, you do,” my brother teased.
I gave him a watery smile, and then went to my car and drove back to Bumblebee House. On the way, I reflected on the past weeks. Even though I’d gotten my heart broken, I’d had some really wonderful times with Ty. It gave me hope that one day I might find a guy who was funny, smart, and kind, who wanted to stick around.
I’d also changed my relationship with Luke and Heather, which was monumental. I only had a few more days before I signed the paperwork and became a part owner of a dance studio. It was a change I was genuinely excited to take on. Mom and Dad had given me the go-ahead to take some of my investment earnings to put into the studio renovations. I had the cashier’s check sitting on my dresser, ready to hand over to Donna at the lawyer’s during our Wednesday meeting.
I sat in the driveway and took a deep breath. This had been really hard. It was still hard, and it was going to be hard for some time to come. But good things had come from it. I had to remember that.
It was my turn to help with supper. Jill and I had decided to make a taco bar and had a great time cutting up tomatoes and searching the fridge for absolutely everything that could possibly taste okay on a taco. Well, Jill had a great time. I did a really good job of pretending.
The girls kept my mind off Ty as they chatted about their workdays and the craziest people they’d ever dealt with. It became a bit of a one-upmanship contest, which Danielle won handily when she told the story of a woman who’d actually vandalized her car after Danielle refused her service.
“She was clearly intoxicated,” Danielle explained dryly. “I didn’t think it would be wise to rent her a car.”
We all cracked up. Mae and Rosa were on dish duty and began clearing plates. I offered to help but they firmly refused.
I was about to ask Jill if she wanted to watch a movie when her phone pinged. She looked down and smiled at it. I sighed inwardly. It was likely Tom making plans with her. Well, I could always watch a movie on my own.