by Beth Burnett
Lynne turns toward me. “I was just telling Davey that this might be my last ladies night.”
“Why’s that?”
“Sarah thinks that since she quit drinking for me, I shouldn’t go out drinking.”
Interesting. “Well, she didn’t quit drinking for you. She quit drinking because she’s an alcoholic and quitting is the right thing to do.”
Lynne sighs. “I guess she isn’t seeing it that way right now. She thinks that for me to go to a bar while she goes to an AA meeting is a slap in the face.”
Davey laughs. “Maybe it is. But it is her journey. Do you have to stop seeing your friends just because she has decided to get sober?”
I take a swig of my beer. “I don’t know. I guess I can see her point. Sort of a solidarity sister thing.”
Lynne shrugs. “I guess. But it doesn’t seem fair to me to have to give up ladies night. I wouldn’t make her give up something so important.”
“It isn’t fair.” Davey shakes her head. “You’ve been going to these with us for a hundred years. It’s childish to try to make you give it up. Couples have to have some separate activities.”
“I agree.” I’m all for separate activities. I don’t ever want a girlfriend who is up my butt all of the time. That’s one of the things I like about Heather. She has school and work and writing and that mystical energy shit she likes to go to.
Lynne is playing with the straw in her drink. “On the other hand, I do kind of see her point. Maybe I should quit drinking. Not because I have to, but because it would be the right thing to do.” She takes a big swallow of her drink and raises her hand for the server. “Three shots,” she says. “Bartender’s choice.”
Davey groans. “Lynne, I can’t get ripped tonight. Besides, isn’t Sarah going to be pissed if you come home drunk?”
“I’m not going to come home drunk. I’m going to come home tipsy. Besides, I can’t let her get back into trying to control what I do. That’s what she did when we were together before.”
Trying to play the impartial observer, I’m looking at both sides of the situation. “Listen. Leah is trying to quit smoking pot. What if we all went out on ladies night and got high? It wouldn’t be nice.”
Lynne shrugs again as the server brings our shots. We raise our glasses and clink. “To friends.”
“Okay, you’re probably right. It isn’t nice. It isn’t fair.”
Davey smiles. “Besides, just because you give up drinking doesn’t mean you have to give up ladies night. We can all meet at a coffee shop or something.”
My head hits the table, and I bang it a few times.
“Andy?” Davey pats the back of my head. “Are you all right?”
“I was just talking to Maggie on the way here and told her that when we decided to start going for coffee instead of booze, we’d know that we’re old.”
“It has nothing to do with being old,” Davey insists. “We’re just getting to that age when we need to be concerned about taking care of our health.”
“Old,” Lynne states firmly.
“Definitely.” I nod wisely. “Let’s face it, we’re getting old. A couple of weeks ago, I turned down a sure thing that was shoving her breasts in my face.”
Davey and Lynne both laugh. “Man, you are old,” Lynne chides.
“Speaking of sure things,” Davey says. “How is Maggie?”
“Not nice, Davey.”
She smiles. “You’re right. I’m sorry. But what’s going on there?”
“Nothing is going on. She’s an old friend, and I’ve been chatting with her.”
“Just chatting?” Lynne wants details.
“We went to lunch on Monday.”
Davey raises an eyebrow. “And?”
“We had lunch. A picnic. It was a beautiful day.”
Lynne smiles. “And you kissed her?”
“How do you do that?” I glare at her.
“I can read it in your face.”
“We kissed. It was nice. But that was it.”
Davey looks at me firmly. “Andy. That woman broke your heart. Do not get involved with her again.”
“I’m not getting involved with her.”
She looks dubious. “Andy.”
“Davey, seriously. This is a woman I dated twenty years ago. I’m an entirely different person. So is she. Besides, I’m kind of getting involved with Heather. I like her. I don’t know where it’s going to go right now, but I want to wait and see.”
Lynne looks impressed. “Andy, it’s not like you to start thinking about monogamy so early in a relationship.”
“I’m not. I’m just putting other women on hold while I explore the possibilities with Heather.”
Lynne puts her hand on my arm and smiles. “Well, I’m proud of you. You’re not rushing into anything, but you’re making an adult decision to give Heather a chance. I think it’s great.”
“Thanks, Lynne.” I put my arm around her and give her a squeeze. “I guess even I can behave like a respectable person occasionally.”
Davey opens her mouth to respond. She pauses, makes a small noise in the back of her throat and looks at me and Lynne. Lynne looks at Davey’s face and whip around. Sarah has come into the bar and is weaving through the tables. I remove my arm from Lynne’s shoulders and move my chair over. Sarah makes it to our table and sits down. Looking at the empty shot glasses on the table, she grabs one and shakes it at Lynne.
“I’m trying to do this for you—for us. What are you doing?”
Lynne raises her hands in a soothing gesture. “Sarah, come on. We had a couple of drinks. In fact, we were just discussing moving ladies night to a coffee shop instead of a bar out of respect for you.”
“Right. And it was probably for me that this one was all over you.”
Davey is incensed. “Oh come on, Sarah. Andy was talking about her new girlfriend and she gave Lynne a friendly hug.”
“I’m not stupid, Davey!”
It suddenly occurs to me that Sarah is drunk. I wonder if Lynne has realized it yet.
“You’re doing a pretty good job at acting like it then,” Lynne says, pissed.
Sarah reels back, knocking one of the shot glasses to the ground. Davey’s eyes widen. Yep, she figured it out. Sarah’s neck is trembling and she’s swaying a bit. Lynne isn’t an idiot. She has to know that Sarah is drunk.
“Don’t be such a bitch, Lynne. I’ve been trying to make this work for us. I’m trying to change!”
“Obviously not, since you’re in here drunk!” Lynne waves her hand around angrily and knocks over her own glass. “Fuck!” She jumps up and mops at her pants.
Sarah laughs. “Apparently, I’m not the only idiot.”
Lynne goes motionless and looks at Sarah in dead silence. “Did you just call me an idiot.”
“No. I said that I am not the only idiot. I didn’t say a word about you.”
Lynne slams her hand down on the table and presses her face close to Sarah. “I go out with my friends once a week and you show up here like some Neanderthal dyke. What are you going to do next? Start a fist fight? Hit someone with a pool cue? Accuse someone of stepping on your balls?”
Sarah tries to stand up, but Lynne pokes her in the chest and knocks her back into the chair. Another glass goes flying. It’s time for me to intervene.
Standing up, I walk around to Sarah and put my hand on her shoulder. “Maybe I should take you home.”
She shrugs off my hand and slams back in her chair, kicking the table. My beer falls over and spills on my chair. Now I’m pissed.
“Sarah, come on.” I wrap one of my hands around her shoulder and drag her to her feet. She looks at me for a second. I stare her down until she drops her eyes.
“I’m trying,” she mumbles. “I’m trying. But it’s so hard.”
She starts shaking and her eyes are filling with tears. Lynne stands up and pushes me aside, wrapping her arms around Sarah and holding her close. Davey and I make eye contact. The server sho
ws up with a towel and starts cleaning up the table.
“I’m sorry, baby,” Sarah cries into Lynne’s shoulder.
“Come on, love. I’ll drive you home.” Lynne opens her purse and puts some money on the table.
“Lynne, I’m not so sure that you’re good to drive, either.” Davey looks worried.
“I’m fine.” She waves her hand, and she and Sarah walk out of the bar.
Davey looks at me. “We probably shouldn’t have let them go.”
Passing my hand over my eyes, I lean my head back against my chair.
“Are you okay, Andy?”
“I’m sick of lesbian drama.”
She laughs. “Your kind does have a lot of drama.”
“I don’t.”
“Sometimes you can’t avoid it.” She takes out some money and signals the server for the bill. I add a few bills to cover the rest. I throw in an extra twenty toward the tip since we made such a mess.
“Want to come over for a while?” Davey asks as we adjourn to our respective vehicles.
“Yeah. I want to check in on Leah anyway.”
“Oh, let me warn you. She’s some kind of pissy.”
“The no-pot thing isn’t going so well?”
“She’s not happy, but she is sticking with it.” Davey shakes her head.
“You know, I don’t know that it’s our place to tell her what to do.”
She gives me the look. “Don’t start, Andy. At her age, she needs to start taking care of her health.”
“That’s what you said about us.”
“That’s true, too.”
I wiggle my fingers at her and jump into my vehicle. Music comes on, cell phone comes out. I dial Heather’s number as I head down Lake Road.
“Hey, Andy.”
“Heather. How was work?”
“Oh, so fun and exciting. How was ladies’ night?”
“Interesting. Sarah showed up drunk.”
“She’s Lynne’s girlfriend, right?”
“Yep.” I reach out and turn the radio down a bit.
“Is everyone all right?”
“Everyone is fine. Sarah and Lynne left together. Both of them a bit drunk, I should say.”
“You should have stopped them from driving.”
“My theory was that Sarah lives two minutes from the bar.”
“Bad theory. People often get killed just a couple of blocks from their house.”
“You’re right. I should have stopped them. It was a bad judgment call on my part.”
“I’m sorry, Andy. I don’t want to argue.”
“We’re not arguing.”
“What about you?” She sounds concerned. “Are you okay to drive?”
“Perfect. I drank one frou-frou shot and one beer. The other was spilled all over my chair.”
“You should be fine.”
“I’m drinking a bottle of water as we speak.”
“What’s next?”
I signal a turn. “Heading to Davey’s to check on Leah.”
“I love her,” Heather laughs.
“Everyone does,” I answer. “Everyone. Some people are shocked by her and some people don’t get her, but everyone loves her.”
“I can see why? She is full of love.”
“That she is.”
“I’m looking forward to our date tomorrow,” she says softly. “Do we need to postpone it to a later time? I don’t want you all exhausted all day.”
Laughing, I shake my head. “I’m shaking my head. I don’t know why I do that. I know you can’t see me.”
“We should get Skype.”
“Maybe not a good idea while I’m driving.”
I pull into Davey’s parking lot. Davey has gotten out of her car and is looking at me. I motion her to go in.
“I’m going to be bright-eyed and bushy-tailed for our morning run.”
“All right. I’m not going to be so easy on you this time.”
“Easy on me? I kicked your ass on our last run.”
“Only because I hadn’t put it into full-gear,” she laughs.
“We’ll see tomorrow,” I growl. “Better be prepared to see the beast.”
“I’m terrified,” she whispers, still laughing.
“See you tomorrow, Heather.”
“Have a great night, Andy.”
Wandering into the house, the first thing I see is Davey, standing by the couch with her lips pursed in that expression of disapproval she often wears around her mother. Leah jumps up when I come in and throws her arms around me. “Andy, come meet my new friend.”
A man stands up and walks over to shake my hand. He’s tall with long hair pulled back in a ponytail. He’s wearing what looks like some kind of pajamas. They are all white and flowing and gauzy. With his dark skin and his black hair, I’m guessing there might be some Native American in him. He’s pretty good-looking for a man. He holds his hand out and I shake it. His grip is firm, but not tight. We make eye contact and he smiles. Making allowances for the strange outfit, I might already like this man.
Leah smiles and puts her arm around him. “This is Wolf Featherstone.”
Wolf Featherstone. I can feel my eyebrow shooting up. That can’t be his real name.
“Andy Ericksson.” I can feel Davey’s eyes on me as I am introduced to Wolf.
“Wolf and I met at a drum circle last week,” Leah says. “I thought it was time we got to know each other a bit more, especially now.”
“Especially now?” I perch on the arm of a chair.
“With my near-death experience,” Leah says.
“Mom. It wasn’t a near death experience!”
“Don’t call me Mom, Davey. And it was a wakeup call. I thought it was time to get my soul in order.”
“Your soul isn’t already in order, Leah?” I’m surprised. She’s been following spiritual paths as long as I’ve known her. I may not always agree with what she believes, but there is no question that she’s a searcher.
“Wolf is an expert.”
“Undoubtedly,” Davey intones. “And how much money does it cost to get your soul in order?”
“Davey!” Leah glares at her, but Wolf isn’t offended.
“I’m not charging her anything, Davey,” he offers. “I’m just helping out as a friend.”
“How exactly are you qualified to help my mother get her soul in order?” She still has a sarcastic tone in her voice.
“My career is guiding people to their deaths.”
I shoot straight up. “You kill people?”
“No,” he answers calmly. “I help the dying to find their spiritual paths, and I sit with them while they take their final breath to see their souls into the next realm.”
“I bet,” Davey retorts. “Bet there is a lot of money in that.”
Wolf is still not perturbed. I’m starting to like him. “Some people have money and they pay me. Some don’t have money and they don’t pay me. I’ve written some books on spirituality. My income comes from that.”
Davey doesn’t look convinced. God knows Leah has brought home a steady stream of strange people throughout our lives, but other than the outfit and the obviously made-up name, he seems pretty normal compared to some of the yahoos we’ve met. He’s nowhere near as weird as the guy who came tiptoeing in to Davey’s grandparents’ house, whispering that we should all get naked if we wanted to be able to feel the true vibrations of the spirits. In fact, there were an awful lot of nudists now that I think about it. Chanters, dancers, drummers, meditators, holistic healers, acupuncturists. Leah has always been kind of a free spirit, but it is suddenly occurring to me that all of her life, at least as long as I’ve been old enough to recognize it, she has been searching for answers. I guess that’s more than I can say for the rest of us.
Wolf sits back on the couch. Leah sits next to him, holding his hand.
“Wolf wants us to have a family session. We need to find out when Danny is available since he’s part of this family now, too.”
>
Davey shakes her head. “I’m not getting Danny involved in some crackpot scheme to find our inner selves. We’re fine the way we are.”
Wolf smiles gently at her. “Then why are you so angry?”
“I’m not angry,” she snaps. She turns on her heel and heads to the door. “Andy, I’m going to Danny’s for the evening.”
“I’m going to head out, too.” Leah gives me a hug and Wolf smiles from the couch. “I hope to see you again soon,” he says as I leave.
I guide Davey out the door and put my arms around her. “Davey,” I whisper before she leaves. “Why are you so angry?”
“I don’t like these people taking advantage of my mother.” She looks up into my face, silently asking for understanding.
Tightening the hug, I let her rest her head against my shoulder for a minute. Davey is a wonderful, generous woman in a lot of ways, but when it comes to her mother, she has a blind spot. I’ve often wondered how someone who is so open-minded in so many ways can be so hard when it comes to Leah.
“Baby girl, I don’t think that guy is trying to take advantage of Leah.” I think back to the looks that had passed between them. “Maybe sexually. But I think that would be a mutual thing.”
“Ew, stop. I don’t want to think about Leah having sex.”
“You’ve always been so close-minded when it comes to her.”
“Try to imagine your mother having sex,” she snaps.
I laugh, thinking about my cold and wealthy mother having a passionate affair with someone named Wolf. “Somehow, I can’t see it.”
I open the door of Davey’s car. She looks at me once more before getting in. “The one thing I can count on is for you to be practical, Andy. I can’t believe you’re buying into this spiritual guidance crap.”
“Davey,” I say, softly. “It doesn’t matter if I believe in it or not. Leah believes in it and if it makes her happy to have something to believe in, who are we to try to take it away?”
She looks up at me from the driver’s seat. “I do want her to be happy.” She sighs. “I just don’t want to see her get hurt.”
“If there’s one thing I know for sure it’s that we can never stop someone else from being hurt.”
I watch her drive away, thinking about Renee and Leah and Heather and Maggie. It seems as if everyone in my universe is searching for something these days. I guess we just all go about it different ways. My searching has always taken the form of casual sex and a long string of hot women. If that isn’t in my plan anymore, I wonder what’s going to replace it.